[churros]

Strong +1 on what other guys said: the girl probably isn't single.

Couple weeks ago I was whining on the forum about a girl that ghosted. I texted her to reboot the other day. Turns out she was seeing a dude the whole time!

Moral of the story? Don't overthink on these bitches.

[XPQ22]

(10-12-2016 09:00 AM)LeoneVolpe Wrote:  

The way girls are nowadays, even if you want her to be your girlfriend you can't really be the one to ask for it because all these "strong, independent women" out there have been socially conditioned to be repulsed by men being "too clingy" AKA wanting them for anything more than a sport fuck.

"Ugh, I hope I wasn't banged out by a player who never contacts me again after the first lay. He better hit me up again so I can turn him down for being needy and feel empowered!"

Along the same lines, it drives girls nuts when they act bored, standoffish, and resistant to physical escalation all through a lame first meet, and then before the end they wanna bear hug me like we're long lost friends, and I just head off and leave them hanging there.

It's my of saying "You probably think that I'm going to hit you up again even though you totally weren't with it, and you'll get the validation from being desired and choosing not to see me again. But actually I knew the score all along and I'm deleting your number moments from now.

I had one girl follow me for a good ten minutes, waiting for me by the bathroom and out by the parking lot, desperately seeking her HUG CLOSE.

[Tigre]

We don't have all the info, but I lean towards: the experience wasn't great for her.

A girl with hypergamy and a bf would at least remain in contact after the bang. If only to see if she could lock you down and safely trade up from bf to you.

She would only be interested in that if she thought you were the better option.

Many girls prefer to return to a known guy rather than take on a random new one. It satisfies her primal desire of getting laid without new risk and without increasing her notch count.

Even if she had a boyfriend and was just looking for some action on the side - it's not a vote of confidence that she had no interest in keeping you on the roster.

[XPQ22]

(10-12-2016 09:30 AM)Tigre Wrote:  

We don't have all the info, but I lean towards: the experience wasn't great for her.

Usually her own fault.

Quote:

A girl with hypergamy and a bf would at least remain in contact after the bang. If only to see if she could lock you down and safely trade up from bf to you.

She would only be interested in that if she thought you were the better option.

Many girls prefer to return to a known guy rather than take on a random new one. It satisfies her primal desire of getting laid without new risk and without increasing her notch count.

Even if she had a boyfriend and was just looking for some action on the side - it's not a vote of confidence that she had no interest in keeping you on the roster.

Lots of women in their late 20s and early 30s may have been in the same stagnant relationship for many years, maybe to some beta provider. They share a dwelling, assets, vehicles, whatever. They may be enamored of the idea of "trading up", but when it comes to trading up for a player who's an unknown quantity vs. her meal ticket and emotional tampon, I'm sure it can be a tough call to make. And keeping random guys in her phone "on the roster" is always a risk the longer it goes on.

And remember that a player who exudes an air of being relaxed and non-needy is the type of guy a girl in a situation like that is deliberately going to seek out. They can tell the players from the squares pretty quickly - they're no fools at least on that point.

With younger women in their teens and early-mid 20s, "she's naturally flighty" is probably the best explanation. With older women, "there's someone else" is generally my go-to hypothesis, except for the most free-spirited of antique sluts.

Quote:

Moral of the story? Don't overthink on these bitches.

Yeah, to keep your sanity you honestly can't spend a lot of time pondering why this girl ghosted afterwards and that one didn't. She liked you enough to bang, which means that as long as you weren't the worst lay she's ever had, there's probably very little you could've done differently with your game to change the outcome. Can't control it - it's whatever their deal is. Not good to spend a lot of time worrying about things you can't control, but it's certainly frustrating to not feel you got a good value for your investment.

Most threads regarding "why did she flake after sex" should simply redirect to this classic:

[Unchained]

(10-12-2016 09:30 AM)Tigre Wrote:  

We don't have all the info, but I lean towards: the experience wasn't great for her.

A girl with hypergamy and a bf would at least remain in contact after the bang. If only to see if she could lock you down and safely trade up from bf to you.

She would only be interested in that if she thought you were the better option.

Many girls prefer to return to a known guy rather than take on a random new one. It satisfies her primal desire of getting laid without new risk and without increasing her notch count.

Even if she had a boyfriend and was just looking for some action on the side - it's not a vote of confidence that she had no interest in keeping you on the roster.

Not really. Some girls only want your dick. They're not looking to "trade up" in every case sometimes they just wanna have fun with a big dick badboy then go back home to their bluepill boyfriend who showers them with validation and attention.

That's why the best option for guys who care mostly about sex is to give off a player/scumbag vibe so she gives it up easy. Easy come easy go.

I just found out a girl I banged like 5 or 6 times is actually dating someone. I fucked her for a week straight then we ghosted each other. She calls me up randomly a month later and we hook up again and her boyfriend calls her and they have an argument on the phone and she tells him he needs to do better.

So for her, I was just a sex toy. She's not going to fall in love with me (nor do I want her to). And even if I did want to "steal" her, the moment I showed I actually cared she would probably get turned off and disgusted.

So many DTF western women are so damaged that just like some other poster mentioned, the moment you show them you think of them as anything other than a "sport fuck" they get disgusted and repulsed by your "neediness".

[WestIndianArchie]

*slow clap for Unchained*

We still need more information from OP, but your breakdown would be part of my overall answer.

WIA

[Rocha]

@Unchained and WIA

We are still missing the OP answers, but from what I understood, simply girls ghost after sex, not after 5 or 6 fuck sessions. IF she bangs you 5 times, there is/was a connection, and she will ghost for a variety of reasons, she could have met another guy in the meanwhile, returned to the boyfriend (alpha or beta does not matter), having a bad time at the job or other personal issue...who knows.
But if there is a padron of girls ghosting after the first time they have sex, there is another kind of issue. My blind guess is that even that if OP bangs them damn well, he is not fucking with their mind and is showing some kind neediness, during or after the act. Other option is that sex sucked...

[WestIndianArchie]

@Rocha, we're definitely speculating at this point.

But Suits questions detail lots of specific scenarios that hit on different reasons.

Bad pre bang game
Bad post bang game
Bad sex
Bad breath
Comfort and trust issues
Etc.

Unchained's approach, being just the guy selling a good time, gives a player max flexibility, which I think is important to highlight.

WIA

[kaotic]

Unchained is right, but I also think it's a bit of both.

I think we can summarize most the scenarios that we've talked about

-That good dick, that good fuck, to get off. (sex toy)
-Angry revenge fucks on a "break" with their boyfriend. (ghost)
-That really good lover and that beta bucks (kept separate)
-Slut Regret/Shame (can be alleviated post sex)
-Freaks out because she might like you (hamster)
-Bad sex (it happens)
-Neediness/Thirst post sex (chasing her)
-Hamster in general (constantly spins)
-WIA's "bad" questions


You can't worry about females like that, but you CAN work on yourself and improve your game/sex life/connection with females.

The hamster runs all sorts of direction, you'll never understand how a female thinks, BUT you can definitely predict what will happen with your interaction with her.

Especially on firsts dates, it's sadly a routine for me now, but I still make it as fun and as intimate as possible.

We can't overanalyze females and their actions, in the end, you work on yourself, and try something new if you aren't getting results.

[WestIndianArchie]

It might be an easy fix.

Like if you meet a chick, and you're inside of her in 30 minutes (some of these Tinder pulls you youngstas are pulling off). That's probably an issue where you didn't build up enough pre bang and post bang trust...or you banged and you were immediately needy.

But it could be a lot more nuanced, dealing with how a player views himself and how he views women. In a lot of cases world view influences behavior in non verbal but detectable ways.

If it keeps happening to the guy. It's usually something with him, not the chicks.

Overall if you run good quality game retention is not the problem. (Dopamine addiction is: Like sugar, a girl should want more, until she realizes it's not good for her, lol

WIA

[Cage]

(10-11-2016 10:29 PM)Unchained Wrote:  

(10-11-2016 09:19 PM)Cage Wrote:  

I hate this shit when it happens but in my view it's probably cause they got more than they bargained for and now regret it. Ie) they didn't bargain on such a hard fuck and now they can't handle it so they do what 90% of women do - turn chicken and vanish. Hah.

I agree. Depending on the experience level of the girl and her expectations, if you come with some tight game and you fuck her good and quick within hours of meeting her especially if it's night game shit, sometimes she goes ghost because she feels like a slut.

Also if she's already a slut "you was just another nigga on the hit list"

Also sometimes with night game it's purely physical there's not much rapport building and so the next day she has basically fucked a stranger. The last chick I fucked didn't even know my name.

Honestly though it's best not to think about WHY women do things in specific individual instances. It is what it is. These days I try not to fuss over the inner workings of the dark abyss known as the female mind. Get in where you fit in and replace em don't chase em.

Agree, but it's useful to keep a tab on these things so you prep yourself against any unwanted surprises. I mean all guys love to keep a goood fuck around for a long a possible until we wear them out. lol.

This way when she ghosts it will not be a shock but an expected part of events.

Ghosting is what the coward ' slut ' does when they have next day regrets, that's women for you - can't even be good sluts, pah !

[Cage]

(10-12-2016 02:30 PM)kaotic Wrote:  

Unchained is right, but I also think it's a bit of both.


-Freaks out because she might like you (hamster)

I also fucking hate, it happens to me a lot. women = emotional cowards.

[Putin Closes]

(10-11-2016 10:51 AM)Suits Wrote:  

Are these night-game, day-game or online-game ONS?

All night game and online game ONS, many within the first 3 hours of meeting. This shame spiral is quite interesting, thing is day game time wise is just a killer, I simply don't have the time to go out couple hours a day and get a few leads.

Tried Pokemon Go when it was hot and got a couple contact info and went nowhere.

But I will look into how to increase performance I'm typically real aggresive, choking, hair pulling, but position wise very vanilla, anyone have a good list of resources on how to actually have good sex. My buddy use to powder viagra, said snorting it made the effect faster, but can't tell if he's bullshitting or actually true.

Just hate the fact spending so much money on booze, much easier on the wallet and health wise to have a couple plates to concentrate on my income. Last night banged this pretty solid 6.5/7, but that's a $100 gone + a nasty hangover. Fully expect ghosting even after making her squirt.

[Jagnum]

(10-12-2016 11:28 PM)Putin Closes Wrote:  

All night game and online game ONS, many within the first 3 hours of meeting. This shame spiral is quite interesting, thing is day game time wise is just a killer, I simply don't have the time to go out couple hours a day and get a few leads.

Tried Pokemon Go when it was hot and got a couple contact info and went nowhere.

But I will look into how to increase performance I'm typically real aggresive, choking, hair pulling, but position wise very vanilla, anyone have a good list of resources on how to actually have good sex. My buddy use to powder viagra, said snorting it made the effect faster, but can't tell if he's bullshitting or actually true.

Just hate the fact spending so much money on booze, much easier on the wallet and health wise to have a couple plates to concentrate on my income. Last night banged this pretty solid 6.5/7, but that's a $100 gone + a nasty hangover. Fully expect ghosting even after making her squirt.

Consider ZMA instead of powder Viagra. If I ever have trouble getting hard, two ZMAs and I'll be rock hard in about 20 minutes. It's more natural than "powder Viagra" or regular Viagra. Again, it works for me. What works for me might not work for you.

Yes, Sex God Method by Daniel Rose is a good place to start. Shoot me a PM, I'll send you a copy.

Sounds like your sex game isn't bad. Remember 90% of sex is psychological, try dirty talking more. It's not only about choking and pulling her hair, it's about telling her all the dirty things you're going to do to her.

Also if you don't like $100 gone + a nasty hangover, don't spend money on booze. You don't have to drink to meet girls. You can go out sober. I do it all the time. The best gamer I know on this forum doesn't drink at all. Goes out all the time and he tears up the bars.

If she asks you why you aren't drinking, the easiest thing to say is "taking a little break." I'm sure there's a more creative thing to say that communicates your standards that you don't need "liquid courage to talk to people you think look interesting", but for now just tell her you're taking a little break.

If you think you need to drink booze to meet girls...

--

To address things said earlier on this thread. A maxim of game I've come to accept is:

Girls do not want to date their one night stands.

Don't expect your one night stand to come back for seconds. Of course, exceptions to every rule, but this is how I operate when I get the ONS. Plan for success, but don't expect to see them again.

After the ONS or first date bang, here's what to consider texting:

Before you have sex, make sure you know what to text her next

I've never met up with a girl for a second bang if she neglects to respond to the text: "We should meet up again some time". Even if she's friendly in a restart a few days afterwards, it means nothing. She's crossed you off her list.

Also, many girls don't want to date guys who bang them on the first date. Of course, exceptions to every rule. More advanced players are sometimes better at pre-screening girls who aren't down for a FB type of setup, if you've read any of BlurredSevens' threads on zero date bangs and harem management.

Earlier this year, I recall a girl I banged on a first date, after rough, hot sex where she told me:

“You are filling me up, I love how good your dick feels inside me." And kissing goodnight and telling me, "See you soon, love."

Then, a week later she texts me to say "I'm sorry Jagnum, I'm seeing someone now...". Lol yes, I'm sure she just started seeing someone a week after we banged.

--

Here's the other thing about ghosting.

I've gone on three, sometimes four or five dates with a girl, before the bang. Obviously, it's not my base case. But sometimes it happens and if I like the girl enough, I'll continue to hang out with her and move the ball up the field.

What gets to me is going out on a few dates with a girl, and you finally have sex, and THEN she ghosts.

It's one of the most frustrating things I've had to deal with in game this year.

Made me realize the traditional narrative of "men are just using women for sex" is false. In this day and age, it's "women are just using men for sex." Women have a plethora of available options.

If she doesn't see you as being a boyfriend for whatever reason, she won't stick around.

In your case, girls do not think of guys they met at a bar/club or online as potential partners.

The best text or sex in the world won't change her mind.

That's okay. Don't get hung up on it. Be persistent over text after the bang, but don't push too much. If she doesn't want to meet up again, go out and approach other girls. It's that simple.

That's post #100. Thanks guys on this forum for being with me on this journey. Onward.

[Putin Closes]

Thanks for the advice Jagnum, real gold mine of knowledge. I found a copy and will read up.

[James Bond Next level]

Lots of great advice here! I feel you bro, I struggled with the same problem and still has it a bit. My conclusions so far :

What is your vibe
If you run typical asshole/douchebag game, she will see you as a sex toy only. If you wanna see her again, connect to her more, make her talk about more meaningful stuff and reveal yourself more. Do something more boyfriendy.



Who is the girl
If you pick a girl who rides plenty of dicks, is afraid of any commitment, is afraid to get too attached or just want to forget her BF for one night, you won't see her again. Pick carefully.

Tighten your game
I don't know how tight your game is, but if you want to see her again, you have to do a bit more than necessary, especially during the date. And of course, awesome sex!

[DonnyGately]

Sometimes you're just a walking dildo. Either that's gonna bother you, or it won't. But it's all part of the game.

[Unchained]

(10-15-2016 03:51 PM)DonnyGately Wrote:  

Sometimes you're just a walking dildo. Either that's gonna bother you, or it won't. But it's all part of the game.

Charge it to the game baby.

Guys spend to much time wondering about shit outside of their control. Contrary to PUA belief, women aren't a video game. You can't just execute the proper cheat code and they'll always do what you want them to do.

It's possible to do everything "right" and still not get what you want. Stop overthinking it and talk to more bitches.

[Graft]

This was one of the stranger things that I came across when I went back on the dating market in the post-technology age. Everything would go great, I'd get laid (from online or daygame), and then the ghost/flake. A couple of times I knew I performed shittily in bed, but other than that it was weird to be used as a sex toy.

Just don't overinvest in women at this point, they are digging their own graves.

[Sikh Warrior]

I once had a one night stand where I woke up right in the middle of the girl leaving and she just smiled, gave me a kiss, and said I didn't have to get up. I never saw her again. Let us be honest, not many people exchange phone numbers and contact information from a same night lay. That is just the nature of the ONS.