[Clown]

I am interested in going out more to get more experience interacting with girls, but I don't really have any guy friends that would make good wingmen. Going out by myself is a scary proposition and I'm looking for advice on how it's done.

1) What sorts of places do I go to?
2) Do I sit by myself or try to join a group immediately?
3) How do I explain why I'm alone if a girl asks?

[wi30]

http://www.rooshv.com/going-out-alone

[thegmanifesto]

Check out the search feature.

Here is a thread:

Advice on Rolling Dolo http://www.rooshvforum.network/thread-1552.html

This topic has been discussed Ad nauseam.

[Basil Ransom]

Some others:
http://www.rooshvforum.network/thread-1003.html
http://www.rooshvforum.network/thread-381.html
http://www.rooshvforum.network/thread-5075.html
http://www.rooshvforum.network/thread-2151.html

[Dash Global]

Get / make some friends.

Stop making excuses.

Going out solo isnt bad but you dont want to make a habit of it.

You need to start networking and making tons of friends and building social proof.

In my town, I can go out to any bar / club by myself and not worry because I will know plenty of people in the joint.

[Tony Snow25]

Dash-

"Going out solo isnt bad but you dont want to make a habit of it."

I don't agree with this statement. If you don't have friends that are good wingmen then it is better to fly solo. What happens if you are more successful when flying solo. You shouldn't make it a habit? If a girl ask you "where are your friends" then she probably isn't interested in you. You shouldn't have to rely on people to go out with you if you want to meet girls.

[Dash Global]

(07-31-2011 07:02 PM)Tony Snow25 Wrote:  

Dash-

"Going out solo isnt bad but you dont want to make a habit of it."

I don't agree with this statement. If you don't have friends that are good wingmen then it is better to fly solo. What happens if you are more successful when flying solo. You shouldn't make it a habit? If a girl ask you "where are your friends" then she probably isn't interested in you. You shouldn't have to rely on people to go out with you if you want to meet girls.

So I must have missed the new rule that your friends must be your "wingman".

Also I didnt realize you couldnt branch off from your friends and run solo game at the venue.

I addressed this in another thread but I will go ahead and touch on this real quick.

Unless you are some weird introvert, having your friends around is more enjoyable and fun than doing things by yourself.

Also like I said above, just because your friends are in the venue doesnt mean you cant branch off and do your own thing. I leave my friends and walk around solo atleast once every night I go out.

If a girl finds out you are in the venue alone It automatically lowers your value 99% of the time. The more people your know, and the more social proof you have the better. Frankly most girls will think you are plain weird and a loser for going out by yourself. Hell I catch flake from simply going out to the movies alone. Going out to a club is 10 times worse in the females eyes. ** this is more in regards to the 18-25 year old crowd, im not talking about the 30 and up crowd that games at hotel bars and upscale lounges**

The bottom line is you can run solo game in a joint with your friends their also. Common sense tells you want to have ALL your options available. ie ability to branch off and do your own thing, and also the ability to use ur social proof to attract and game females. The more friends you have in the place the higher the chance you will have of being introduced to females and expanding your social circle / network.

There is nothing that a guy going to a joint solo can do that I cant do with my friends there.

Like I said there is nothing wrong with going out solo and I advise EVERY guy to be able / confident / comfortable to go out alone when the time calls for it.

[Blade]

I am a veteran in the solo-dolo game, but am now incapable of going to a venue and not having at least 10 people with whom I can hang out with already there. But trust me, I know what you are going through. Straight up, going out alone is scary at first. I moved to Pittsburgh a year and a half ago and knew one person. He was the epitome of what you do NOT want as a wingman. So I decided to go it alone and am now better known than I want to be, but rack up an average of 1 new notch every other week if I put forth zero effort, simply by making friends in the field. It took a lot of hard work to get to this point, and I learned a lot of lessons.

1. Venues: Simple. Wherever you feel comfortable and will enjoy your evening. Music, clientele, etc. Check around on nightlife-oriented websites for reviews. Facebook is good, too, if you know venue names. Just look at the pictures and you will get a feel for what the place will be like.

2. Presentation: You may need some prep time. Start hitting the gym. Hard. GET LEAN. Lean face makes for a stronger jaw line. I don't care what anyone says, looking good helps. Go out dressed VERY stylishly when you roll solo. I favor the vest and dress shirt, Miami style, shirt unbuttoned. You are solo. Lay back a bit. Post up by the bar, chat with the bar tender. You need to show up early.

Remember: You are new in town and you want to make friends.

Target personnel: For access to attractive girls (7+'s), you need to access the "in crowd". This is the nightlife scene crowd. Promoters, VIP Hosts, bartenders, even some bouncers. Club resident DJs are GREAT friends to have. Just go bullshit with him about music, when possible. When you appreciate their musical tastes and what they do as an art (which it is), they will LOVE you and introduce you to their friends, who always have tons of hot friends. (i.e. promoters) Promoters and VIP managers have tons of sexy friends. It is their job. You become friends with them, you are a made man

You are new in town.

Make new friends: Select a target group and mingle. Make sure you will have good synergy. These are your wingmen. Make sure they are energetic and alpha-like. Win one over. I met my crew from last summer at a Steve Aoki show, opened the convo by making a drug reference, and out of it became best friends with the promoter and VIP manager of the club. Keep in mind, the guys who are out a lot can give you the down-low on a lot of info. The key: MAKE SHIT HAPPEN. You pull your weight, you just gained yourself access to a new network of people. Do this continuously. Then build your own dream team. I have a team of pure-bred alpha-males, who I hand selected out of everyone I knew after a year of searching. These guys get together, fun as had and girls are pounded. It's inevitable. You can build your own team. And they make you. But you have to make shit happen on the regular in order to reach this golden land of easy pussy. Can't be a slouch. Every man on my team banged girls the first time they hung out with me. Except the one kid from my original crew. He was one of the guys I met at the Steve Aoki show, and he is an event manager. Gets me laid all the time. Awesome. You need to sharpen your skills at making this happen by pulling on your own while making friends.

You are new in town.

Follow standard approach tactics when opening, and make sure you can close. hough if you pull this method off right, you won't have too for long. I have girls thrown at me now. I got good at closing on my own. I made friends with whom I worked well with and had common interests, and we have been plowing girls ever since.

YOU ARE NEW IN TOWN!!!

Get into the character of being new in town. It helped me being new in town and needing to make new friends. So you make yourself into a newcomer. Think from that position. You want to infiltrate the structure of the club scene.

Remember, the nightlife scene has a structure. People who run shit, and people who hang out with them. The alphas and the betas. Seek out the alphas. Work their networks. My life as it is now as a 25 year old prior-military college student was built out of this method. My VIP birthday bash was taken care of by others, and I was thrown car models as a kicker. They were in town and the VIP manager brought them to my VIP section as a favor to me.

(07-31-2011 12:23 PM)Clown Wrote:  

I am interested in going out more to get more experience interacting with girls, but I don't really have any guy friends that would make good wingmen. Going out by myself is a scary proposition and I'm looking for advice on how it's done.

1) What sorts of places do I go to?
2) Do I sit by myself or try to join a group immediately?
3) How do I explain why I'm alone if a girl asks?

[Hazaer]

Hey guys, I would like some suggestions on getting the motivation to roll solo on a weekend night. There are too many times, I have told myself to go out gaming by myself for the weekend of that week and later kind of gave myself an excuse not to at the very last minute. I have read things like Bang and Mystery method so the theory is there but its just that some kind of hesitancy gets in the way when the evening in question (fri/sat evening) actually comes. I end up watching movies or just decide to catch up on sleep. I think part of the reason is that, being in a small city of 80K, I think it might be awkward being a lone regular in a venue every week or maybe its the approach anxiety. But I have rolled solo before in a very intermittent manner.

Will be great if those guys who have rolled solo can share their routines that make them motivated or helps them to get into the right frame of mind.

Thanks.

[Phoenix]

(06-25-2016 08:44 AM)Hazaer Wrote:  

Hey guys, I would like some suggestions on getting the motivation to roll solo on a weekend night. There are too many times, I have told myself to go out gaming by myself for the weekend of that week and later kind of gave myself an excuse not to at the very last minute. I have read things like Bang and Mystery method so the theory is there but its just that some kind of hesitancy gets in the way when the evening in question (fri/sat evening) actually comes. I end up watching movies or just decide to catch up on sleep. I think part of the reason is that, being in a small city of 80K, I think it might be awkward being a lone regular in a venue every week or maybe its the approach anxiety. But I have rolled solo before in a very intermittent manner.

Will be great if those guys who have rolled solo can share their routines that make them motivated or helps them to get into the right frame of mind.

Thanks.

Motivation:
- It results in me sticking my dick in girls. This makes me happy.

Reasons for solo:
- It strengthens your overall social muscles. This helps you later in life not just in getting chicks, but in business etc too. The surest way to meet new folk is to be alone and say hi to random folk.
- You don't have to worry about wingmen. 90% of the time, wingmen do not improve your chances. If your wingman is an RVFer, yes it will help -- because the quality will be high. But most wingmen damage your chances for a multitude of reasons. The only times I've ever benefited from having a wingman were when the guy was savvy as fuck, basically at the standard of a reputable RVFer like Linux or Dreambig. And you're not going to meet guys like that unless you go out alone and say hi to new people.
- You can do it whenever, so your constraint is only yourself. You can go wherever the fuck you want, whenever the fuck you want, and be in total control of yourself and your life.

In general, 90%+ of my successful nights have started solo. Occasionally, I have recruited an "insta wingman" which has helped (not with any frequency). But in general, I start by talking to random dudes. If the dude is a fuckwit, he either walks off himself or I cut him loose, and later slinks off home alone after staring at chicks and doing nothing. If he is cool, he's good to start the social ball rolling. I start pinging chicks. Eventually I'll find a chick who is warm, and try and drive it home. The biggest issue, depending on country, is screening timewasters. Etc etc.

Basically, if you are not putting in the effort to flex your social muscles, and grow in that regard, you're a lazy fuck who's going to die alone after all his peers have fucked the nice chicks. Motivation enough?

Also probably move to a city. That's a town.

Also the routine is this: I put on going-out clothes. I go out. I talk to people -- but I talk to people with intent. That's it.

[Hazaer]

(06-25-2016 11:11 AM)Phoenix Wrote:  

(06-25-2016 08:44 AM)Hazaer Wrote:  

Hey guys, I would like some suggestions on getting the motivation to roll solo on a weekend night. There are too many times, I have told myself to go out gaming by myself for the weekend of that week and later kind of gave myself an excuse not to at the very last minute. I have read things like Bang and Mystery method so the theory is there but its just that some kind of hesitancy gets in the way when the evening in question (fri/sat evening) actually comes. I end up watching movies or just decide to catch up on sleep. I think part of the reason is that, being in a small city of 80K, I think it might be awkward being a lone regular in a venue every week or maybe its the approach anxiety. But I have rolled solo before in a very intermittent manner.

Will be great if those guys who have rolled solo can share their routines that make them motivated or helps them to get into the right frame of mind.

Thanks.

Motivation:
- It results in me sticking my dick in girls. This makes me happy.

Reasons for solo:
- It strengthens your overall social muscles. This helps you later in life not just in getting chicks, but in business etc too. The surest way to meet new folk is to be alone and say hi to random folk.
- You don't have to worry about wingmen. 90% of the time, wingmen do not improve your chances. If your wingman is an RVFer, yes it will help -- because the quality will be high. But most wingmen damage your chances for a multitude of reasons. The only times I've ever benefited from having a wingman were when the guy was savvy as fuck, basically at the standard of a reputable RVFer like Linux or Dreambig. And you're not going to meet guys like that unless you go out alone and say hi to new people.
- You can do it whenever, so your constraint is only yourself. You can go wherever the fuck you want, whenever the fuck you want, and be in total control of yourself and your life.

In general, 90%+ of my successful nights have started solo. Occasionally, I have recruited an "insta wingman" which has helped (not with any frequency). But in general, I start by talking to random dudes. If the dude is a fuckwit, he either walks off himself or I cut him loose, and later slinks off home alone after staring at chicks and doing nothing. If he is cool, he's good to start the social ball rolling. I start pinging chicks. Eventually I'll find a chick who is warm, and try and drive it home. The biggest issue, depending on country, is screening timewasters. Etc etc.

Basically, if you are not putting in the effort to flex your social muscles, and grow in that regard, you're a lazy fuck who's going to die alone after all his peers have fucked the nice chicks. Motivation enough?

Also probably move to a city. That's a town.

Also the routine is this: I put on going-out clothes. I go out. I talk to people -- but I talk to people with intent. That's it.

Yeah laziness is probably a part of it. Its also a procrastination mentality at work, putting it off for the next weekend and telling oneself that I am saving some money by not going out. Being in a small city also makes for a rather quiet downtown at night even for weekends which does not make for an attractive nightlife. But you might have had a good suggestion there.. Dressing up for a late dinner even if you are having it at your place might set the tone for going out that night.

[Phoenix]

From the tone of your reply, it doesn't sound like you're getting it.

You're from Australia, as am I, so I can understand where this lazy attitude comes from.

This is the visualization exercise you should undertake:
- Imagine doing what you are doing now, for the next 2 years. Imagine where you end up as a result. Imagine the things you've missed out on. Imagine where you are now.
- Imagine doing it for 5 years. Imagine where you are now. What you look like. How your life has gone by with no success or happiness while every other man around you grins ear-to-ear about theirs.
- Imagine it for 10 years, for 20 years. What do you look like now? What do you have? What have you lost as a result of what you've done, and what you've failed to do? Think about it, feel it, feel the misery and the sorrow and the despair. It's over. It's over.
- Now come back. It's 2016, and none of that has happened. You can choose to do everything different.
- Now imagine you're doing your very best. You're putting in the work. You're out and about, busy hustling for what you want. You're taking the punches the world throws at you. You're shrugging them off and marching ahead. Imagine you do this for 2 years, where are you now? What joy have you now had as a result of this?
- Imagine the next 5, 10, 20 years, doing this. Where are you now? What do you look like now? What do you have now? How happy are you now.

That's how you fix your attitude. Bring the inevitable future into today's mind.

[rapaz12]

For me, it helps to come out earlier and also go to a place that lets you slowly warm up for the night.

For example, I might go out around 8pm and just chat with whoever or just sit at the front where the bartenders are quietly for an hour or so at a bar I like. After this hour, I start to walk around to other bars since they're all close proximity in my town.

I like doing it this way because people will slowly start trickling in while you're relaxing and before you know it, the place will be packed. The only difference is I'm not very anxious about all the people there and being alone because I've slowly eased myself into the packed environment.

I think of it as easing into a cold pool. It sucks when you jump in all at once, but if you ease your body in, it doesn't feel as bad.

[Hazaer]

(06-26-2016 08:08 AM)Phoenix Wrote:  

From the tone of your reply, it doesn't sound like you're getting it.

You're from Australia, as am I, so I can understand where this lazy attitude comes from.

This is the visualization exercise you should undertake:
- Imagine doing what you are doing now, for the next 2 years. Imagine where you end up as a result. Imagine the things you've missed out on. Imagine where you are now.
- Imagine doing it for 5 years. Imagine where you are now. What you look like. How your life has gone by with no success or happiness while every other man around you grins ear-to-ear about theirs.
- Imagine it for 10 years, for 20 years. What do you look like now? What do you have? What have you lost as a result of what you've done, and what you've failed to do? Think about it, feel it, feel the misery and the sorrow and the despair. It's over. It's over.
- Now come back. It's 2016, and none of that has happened. You can choose to do everything different.
- Now imagine you're doing your very best. You're putting in the work. You're out and about, busy hustling for what you want. You're taking the punches the world throws at you. You're shrugging them off and marching ahead. Imagine you do this for 2 years, where are you now? What joy have you now had as a result of this?
- Imagine the next 5, 10, 20 years, doing this. Where are you now? What do you look like now? What do you have now? How happy are you now.

That's how you fix your attitude. Bring the inevitable future into today's mind.

This is something that I think about from time to time. Yes, it is a source of motivation for every guy in this forum but when the day to go out is upon me, that awkwardness of going out alone and standing there by myself just take over. The fact that there are only a handful of venues in my city and me going to the same places every week, thus, appearing to everyone there who might be regulars themselves, as the loner, kind of takes over and I just dont do it. But when there are people, going out with me, back in my college days, I didnt really mind going to the same venue every week. Its probably something psychological about having a night out alone, I guess.

[Hazaer]

(06-27-2016 11:46 PM)rapaz12 Wrote:  

For me, it helps to come out earlier and also go to a place that lets you slowly warm up for the night.

For example, I might go out around 8pm and just chat with whoever or just sit at the front where the bartenders are quietly for an hour or so at a bar I like. After this hour, I start to walk around to other bars since they're all close proximity in my town.

I like doing it this way because people will slowly start trickling in while you're relaxing and before you know it, the place will be packed. The only difference is I'm not very anxious about all the people there and being alone because I've slowly eased myself into the packed environment.

I think of it as easing into a cold pool. It sucks when you jump in all at once, but if you ease your body in, it doesn't feel as bad.

Yeah, its a good idea. I am actually planning to go out an hour earlier to get in the mood, maybe at abt 9.30. But in more regional cities there are no streets lined with bars, rather there might be only a handful of venues going on a particular night and if you are there early, you gotta be there for a longer period of time and if you are not socialising a lot, it can be a bit weird to yourself and those around you. But being more chatty with strangers is something I am working on.

Btw, I read one of roosh's blogs and he recommends an episode of Seinfeld before going out to ease yourself into the mood on a night out solo.

[gang]

Went out to a bar alone my first day being 21, went to bars alone before that in Mexico. Been doing it since I can remember and it's very natural to me. Sometimes I forget most people are trapped in their own minds and would never dare to go out alone. To be dependent on another person to go out seems like a bitch life to me.

[brokinetic]

I went out alone to a night club once but it ended in disaster and I went back home early. I'm a daygamer and rarely do nightgame.

I tried having wings but most of them don't help as they rarely feed any positive energy. Once a guy from a local forum asked me to send him my pic. I refused as it was akward.

However, recently my housemate started winging me. He just came to know about daygame but we help each other to be in a social mode. Basicly, I still prefer going out alone as it helps me to be independant and I love the freedom. A good wing is a wing that gets along well with us in daily life who shares at least a few principles with you, or else better role alone.

https://brokinetic.wordpress.com

[GreenHills]

(06-25-2016 08:44 AM)Hazaer Wrote:  

I think it might be awkward being a lone regular in a venue every week or maybe its the approach anxiety. But I have rolled solo before in a very intermittent manner.

Will be great if those guys who have rolled solo can share their routines that make them motivated or helps them to get into the right frame of mind.

Thanks.

1. There's probably more than one place to go out in your hood. Go out to three places, one every weekend, and nobody will think that you're a regular.

2. I'm a regular at one bar near my place. The bartender knows me by name. She likes me. Nothing bad about being a regular. Girls like guys that know the bartenders, since in our lame society, bartenders are high value individuals.

3. You're in front of the bar and you're afraid to go in. I can't think right now of an easier fear to face. There's absolutely nothing that can go wrong and once you do it, you'd have conquered a fear. The bartenders don't give a shit, they deal with far worse drunk idiots.

Motivation: If you go out enough times, you'll get laid. I'm not a pro, but I have found out that I can reliably pull from bars if I go out enough times. And it's always a thrill.

[Hazaer]

(07-06-2016 07:08 PM)GreenHills Wrote:  

(06-25-2016 08:44 AM)Hazaer Wrote:  

I think it might be awkward being a lone regular in a venue every week or maybe its the approach anxiety. But I have rolled solo before in a very intermittent manner.

Will be great if those guys who have rolled solo can share their routines that make them motivated or helps them to get into the right frame of mind.

Thanks.

1. There's probably more than one place to go out in your hood. Go out to three places, one every weekend, and nobody will think that you're a regular.

2. I'm a regular at one bar near my place. The bartender knows me by name. She likes me. Nothing bad about being a regular. Girls like guys that know the bartenders, since in our lame society, bartenders are high value individuals.

3. You're in front of the bar and you're afraid to go in. I can't think right now of an easier fear to face. There's absolutely nothing that can go wrong and once you do it, you'd have conquered a fear. The bartenders don't give a shit, they deal with far worse drunk idiots.

Motivation: If you go out enough times, you'll get laid. I'm not a pro, but I have found out that I can reliably pull from bars if I go out enough times. And it's always a thrill.

In my place, there are only about 3 venues worth going and if you are going friday and saturday, its difficult not being a regular. But you are right, this awkwardness is something I have to overcome and turn it into an advantage.

[DimeBait]

I went out 30 nights straight when I moved to a new city by myself. To mentally prepare, I'd open every person I had extended contact with during the day @work, @lunch, etc. It put me in the mindset. Once I went out, I'd get my drink, and open the first set that gave me any form of eye contact, men women, groups, whatever just to stay occupied. My social interaction only improved from there.

[AboveAverageJoe]

I prefer gaming solo over a wingman most of the time. It is hard to find a competent wingman that doesn't have competing tastes. I used to work with Black wingmen who always wanted to go for the lightest and whitest chick available whereas I was after the slimmest and the prettiest. The "Black Barbies" as I used to call them long before Nicki Minaj even grew a pair of tits. That system served me well. Now I just roll alone. It is easier when you don't have to accomodate anyone other than yourself. A wingman is really only necessary if you are going somewhere where women are in groups which is usually night game. If you only day game like me, most women are by themselves. A wingman would get in the way especially if he is taller and better looking.

[Pointer]

(07-31-2011 12:23 PM)Clown Wrote:  

I am interested in going out more to get more experience interacting with girls, but I don't really have any guy friends that would make good wingmen. Going out by myself is a scary proposition and I'm looking for advice on how it's done.

1) What sorts of places do I go to?
2) Do I sit by myself or try to join a group immediately?
3) How do I explain why I'm alone if a girl asks?

1. Crowded places where you can talk to people without sitting down. When going solo it's important to find good venues. In small towns it can be difficult.
2. Start talking as soon as you enter the venue. It's best to do so while you wait for your drink or if you smoke then it's easy to ask for a light and start a conversation.
3. "My friends are over there (point to some random group)"
"My friends will join me in 10 mins"
"My friends went to this place to check it out"
Never had any trouble with this question. Girls don't care if you're with friends or not once you isolate them.

Going solo is the best way to learn game. You will build up inner confidence and you will do far more approaches than with friends.

I recommend traveling alone for a few months, you will develop skills that will later help you be more confident. Lastly, you can have a few drinks before going out.

[Hazaer]

(07-10-2016 06:33 PM)Pointer Wrote:  

(07-31-2011 12:23 PM)Clown Wrote:  

I am interested in going out more to get more experience interacting with girls, but I don't really have any guy friends that would make good wingmen. Going out by myself is a scary proposition and I'm looking for advice on how it's done.

1) What sorts of places do I go to?
2) Do I sit by myself or try to join a group immediately?
3) How do I explain why I'm alone if a girl asks?

1. Crowded places where you can talk to people without sitting down. When going solo it's important to find good venues. In small towns it can be difficult.
2. Start talking as soon as you enter the venue. It's best to do so while you wait for your drink or if you smoke then it's easy to ask for a light and start a conversation.
3. "My friends are over there (point to some random group)"
"My friends will join me in 10 mins"
"My friends went to this place to check it out"
Never had any trouble with this question. Girls don't care if you're with friends or not once you isolate them.

Going solo is the best way to learn game. You will build up inner confidence and you will do far more approaches than with friends.

I recommend traveling alone for a few months, you will develop skills that will later help you be more confident. Lastly, you can have a few drinks before going out.

I think the challenge in dealing with this is when the set doesnt hook especially if its all girls and you cant isolate. Girls might then start asking where are those friends. Ejecting the set would then be the best option but since you are solo, the awkwardness of then wandering around might be damaging unless you rapidly open another set. But if you are doing this too much with poor body language you might give off the needy vibe especially if you are in a small city with a venue that is not fully packed.