I wrote this for a blog a while back that I never got going.
It happens every day. It happens to the clueless guys who will become even more of the beta provider type and it will happens to the most alpha, machismo bravado types.
It is never an accident. Maybe you didn’t use a condom. Maybe you didn’t pull out. You DID make the conscious decision to fuck her and not prevent the pregnancy.
Before I get started, let me throw this out there. Disclaimer: The following is not legal advice, it is simply what worked for me and my friends. I am NOT an attorney. Consult a lawyer. If he does not agree, fuck that spineless attorney and find one that does.
You are responsible for your seed. Take control of it and don’t become its bitch!
Everyone knows those guys that pay child support. They whine about it. They see their kid a time or two a month. They are terrified to change jobs or take any chances in life. What if it doesn’t work out and then they owe back child support?
They are afraid to do anything with their life in fear they won’t make their payment on time and “baby momma” will take them back to court. The system will lock them up and forget about them.
They are right. Do not be controlled by your seed!
In the USA where women are allowed to freely murder their unborn children there are five most possible scenarios when becoming a father and here is my answer to each. This plan applies to all.
1. You are a “good” guy and want to make it work with her even though you have major differences.
2. You don’t hardly know her or you do and want nothing to do with her.
3. You want to stay on friendly terms with her but don’t want to be with her but do want to be a part of the kid’s life.
4. You love her and are shopping for a ring but stumbled on this or another manosphere site.
5. You hate her guts and want to inflict maximum damage and not get fucked.
Let’s review the options.
You are a “good” guy and want to make it work with her even though you have major differences.
Hope into one hand and shit into the other. Which fills up first? Hope something changes and it works out? People don’t change. Women don’t change.
You have your differences and it is noble to want to work through them. Bottom line is 99% of people do not change.
If she wants to change, good for her. Be pleasant. Be cooperative. Talk about the plans for the kiddo. Wait to see (the unlikely event of) change. But for now, attack! You can reconcile later after Scubadude's plan is implemented.
You don’t hardly know her or you do and want nothing to do with her.
You got drunk and probably would have been better off sticking your dick in a blender or smashing it with a toilet seat. But you didn’t.
Maybe you two are some fairytale story. More than likely you are not. You need to follow this plan to the letter.
You want to stay on friendly terms with her but don’t want to be with her but do want to be a part of the kid’s life.
So you think you will just be supportive through the pregnancy and things will work themselves out after the delivery. You are most probably wrong. I want to find the pot of gold at the end of the rainbow and win Powerball. Stop dreaming and follow Scubadude's plan.
You love her and are shopping for a ring but stumbled on this or another manosphere site.
Good luck. Start reading everything you can about marriage and divorce in the USA.
You hate her guts and want to inflict maximum damage and/or not get screwed by the court system.
This plan is especially for you. It is what happened to me and what this is designed for. Follow the plan. Do not do anything stupid that is a crime. Follow my plan and be as good off as possible.
Here is my plan for custody battles. This will benefit 90% + of men in any of the above situations.
Scubadude's plan.
This isn’t really my plan. It is advice given to me by several men many years ago when I was in a bad situation.
“In case of doubt, attack.”
General George S. Patton
It is time to go on the offensive.
Just find out she is pregnant? Go on the offensive.
Been dealing with her pregnancy attitude and hormonal swings for months but not committed to her? Go on the offensive.
Not sure what you want to do? Go on the offensive.
Cowering and waiting for the subpoena is not an option
Talk to a lawyer. Talk to a several. Be on the offensive.
There are two type of custody. Legal and physical.
Legal custody is who makes the important decisions such as religion, school medical care etc.
Physical Custody is where the kid lives and where it spends time.
The following is the most important words I can say
YOU WANT FULL LEGAL CUSTODY
Let me repeat that.
YOU WANT FULL LEGAL CUSTODY
This means you make all the important decisions and don’t have to consult her.
“A good plan, violently executed now, is better than a perfect plan next week”
General George S. Patton
There are several steps to this plan and I can not number them because they are all equally important and need to be implemented together. One is not necessarily more important as they are all reliant on the other parts.
Step One: Stop incriminating yourself.
Shut the fuck up.
Delete Facebook, Twitter and any other social media accounts. I don’t care how harmless a post seems, a good a lawyer (her’s) will turn them around on you.
Do not edit your accounts. DELETE THEM.
Do not argue with her or discuss details on text, email or phone. It can all be used against you.
Save all of her info you can
This coincides with part A and needs to be done at the same time. Before you delete your accounts you need to be able to see any friends only access available.
Screen shot everything. Save one copy to disk and print another at minimum.
A post from three years ago showing she is depressed? Absolutely. “liking” mentally unstable posts? Money. Cursing, sexual deviancy or violent references? Without doubt. If there is a post, tweet or picture showing anything short of sainthood, you want it.
Pregnancy hormones are hell. They will play all kinds of games on her., They will make her say and do all kinds of crazy things. Document and or record it all. All emails, calls, texts and tweets.
After the baby is born with postpartal depression they can get even crazier. Document it all.
Screen shots of texts are easy to take. If she calls non stop and curses or makes threats you want it recorded to play to the judge. Use a digital recorder of your choice.
Step Two: Consult an attorney
Or a few- if you live in a small town. It’s called “conflicting out”. When you pay a fee to an attorney and explain some details of your case, you have created an attorney client relationship.
Now she can not hire him to represent her in the matter without a conflict of interest being created. He won’t take her on so now she can’t get the best in your town. This is most effective in smaller towns that don’t have 100’s of good attorneys.
Read everything you can for a couple days before the meeting. Tell him (do not get a female attorney, I will explain in another post) what you want. If they just want a big retainer and can not give you a plan or what to expect, move on to the next attorney. You want the smartest asshole you can afford.
Step Three: Go for the throat
The court will not award you anything you do not ask for.
Being aggressive from the start puts her on the defensive.
No matter how you feel now, unless you are a true psychopath you will love the child once it is born or at least after DNA tests confirm it’s yours.
Speaking of, you were planning on getting a DNA test right? EVERY man needs to insist on one no matter what she says. There are private places you can get them done for a hundred bucks.
You went to the attorney first. Your name will be on top of the paper. You will be the petitioner. You want to ask for the world. You can settle for less later.
Think long and hard what you want to ask for. There are many possible variations.
Full legal custody and full physical custody.
Full legal custody and shared physical custody.
The list goes on.
But no matter what you want full legal custody. You don’t want to fight with her years down the road over some trivial matter. It needs to be your decision alone.
Most states have calculators for child support. The amounts paid vary based on incomes and days spent with each parent. Find an amount that will work best for you.
Lastly, Stick To Your Guns
You can compromise on some issues but decide what is important and stick to it. She will have many many mood swings and try to convince you of stuff and situations that are not true. Stick to your guns.
That is it for the plan. It is simple but it works out better that waiting around for a subpoena and wage garnishment. It puts you in the driver’s seat and gives you more control over your future.
In case you missed it at the top. I am not a lawyer. This is simply what I’ve seen work. Consult a real attorney.
