[EDantes]

I agree more or less with the other posts here:

The one thing that irks me is that guys who have lots of female friends are usually just beta orbiters looking for a chance to score. (Not to mention women rarely if ever give hard-hitting advice that a guy needs if he's looking to get his life in shape, the women I've known usually just 'coddle' a guy and try to make him feel better about himself like he's their son or something, going well out of their way not to 'offend' anyone). I think guys who are beta purposely gravitate toward 'female friends' for this reason, they basically just want a "safe space" where they don't have to worry about being "judged" for acting too beta.

I definitely believe a guy should make an effort primary to have male friends; if he 'hangs out' with women too much I think he might start to identify too much with women and lose touch with his masculinity.

I won't say I'm totally against it, though I can see why it might be complicated especially if the woman is interested in you.

[EDantes]

(04-16-2016 01:00 PM)Comte De St. Germain Wrote:  

(04-16-2016 12:51 PM)General Stalin Wrote:  

(04-16-2016 11:30 AM)Comte De St. Germain Wrote:  

(04-16-2016 11:08 AM)General Stalin Wrote:  

(04-15-2016 08:53 PM)Comte De St. Germain Wrote:  

On a personal note I do enjoy the company of a good looking woman if I'm having coffee or tea, outside with good weather, and reading a book at the coffee joints I frequent. It's kind of the perfect atmosphere for me to enjoy myself.

Everything feels better with beautiful company period. My coffee is tastier. The cloudy sky feels nicer. Whenever I look up from my book I see a pretty face, and if I get tired of reading for a bit I can flirt/verbally spar with her for a bit.

Then again that's a more personal preference, but I do recommend it. It's very cathartic and all feels right in the world.

This actually made me think about a trait I possess and I'm not sure if it's negative social anxiety issue or merely a harmless personal preference:

I cannot do what you explain here. Reason being, if I'm sharing personal time with an attractive female, I want to be intimate with her. That doesn't mean I can't enjoy a drink and chat idly, but I like to have the idea in my head that I can kiss this girl, touch her body, and possibly have sex with her.

This is the reason I do not go to strip clubs. I see no benefit to myself hanging around with sexually arousing women who I am not going to potentially be intimate with. It just becomes and pointless distraction for me.

It's not for everyone. For me it's like enjoying a fine piece of art. The occasional giggles or inane comment with a sweet voice. She's dressed nice so she's exciting and beautiful. A bit of human warmth as girls like to lean against my shoulder. The last girl I did this with liked to grab my cigarette out of mouth and take drags then put it back in which I found kind of endearing in a strange way.

The closest experience I would describe it too as the eldest with two siblings and the second eldest out of all of cousins in a large family where I had to look after a lot of kids, is like playing with kids. It just evokes warm feelings and a smile just playing around a bit like that.

It's not really an intelligent kind of emotion, but more like stopping complex thoughts and enjoying a bit of pleasantness.

Honestly it's actually rather hard to relate something like a feeling into words especially when the target doesn't have the same kind of appreciation for it(such as my not being able to enjoy country music, but a lot of people I know do).

I completely understand that, and it's not a foreign concept to me - I just can't bring myself to feel that way about it (yet).

I don't know how old you are or your history of game in comparison to mine. I'm still in my 20's and my hormones are still raging, so being able to sit back, chill, and just appreciate the more subtle fine points of female company does not come as easily to me. That is, without the idea in my head that we can/will be smashing.

I guess it really comes down to self control. Can I subdue my sexual urges and desires when spending time with an attractive woman? Should I?

Odds are I'm probably younger than you. You shouldn't have to subdue any urges unless you have too(and I'm completely understand the hormones raging bit). If anything it's a guilty pleasure more than it is something completely utilitarian and with use unlike my general sentiments towards attractive female friends earlier in the thread.

I just kind of enjoying chilling with an attractive woman. Some people will. Some people won't. As enjoying something is due to someone's life experiences and preferences.

My view used to be more like Stalin's - lately though I've been aiming for more of the "player" mindset you're describing, actually enjoying the overall experience with women versus 'hating women' but still liking to have sex with them.

Being honest the times I had this mindset are when my game was at its best anyway, when I was strictly thinking with my dick or not even liking the woman I was wanting to have sex with my game came across as more contrived and more likely to fail.

(I also felt that strip clubs were pretty beta for the most part; paying just to get close to an attractive woman instead of actually using game).