[jbkunt2]

Hi all,

I suffer from mild-ish social anxiety and awkwardness. I don't suffer from a lack of confidence or self-esteem. I personally think that they are two different things, though I understand why others my disagree.

I suffer from Rosacea, so I blush very easily in social situations. It's extremely noticeable, and projects awkwardness. Throughout my life, it's pulled me back a bit in some ways. I deal with it though.

My body essentially has a strong physical reaction to the symptoms of social anxiety, e.g. fast heart rate, awkward body language.

I just got out of an LTR and landed a date with a HB8. I was nervous as its the first date I've been on in 2 plus years.

I got a script for Proporanalol, which is a beta blocker. It lowers your blood pressure, which really reduces the physical symptoms of social anxiety. It's commonly used by performers, musicians, businessmen, etc. for presentations/performances on stage.

I popped one an hour before my date, and felt very in control and comfortable. It does not alter your mental state in anyway, so you may still feel nerves. As I said, I feel confident on the inside, but my physical reaction can be misleading.

I only popped it for the first date, and recently went on a second, sober and without propranalol. I only need a boost for that first 10 minutes.

Has anyone used this or other drugs (e.g. SSRIs, Benzos, Adderral, etc.) for a short-term boost, e.g. for dealing with AA? Obviously MDMA is a super boost but the come down is not worth it.

I feel this approach can be useful for some people if used sporadically for getting numbers, and handling first dates.

Please no lectures or preaching about ''squeezing your balls and just getting it done'', etc.

[trojans10]

hey OP,

i use it. more so for speeches or public speaking. but with that drug, you want to just take it anytime you feel like you'll be in a anxieity driven situation. you also only wanna take 1/4 of a pill. or half. it still works great. if you start taking full pills, itll lose its efectiveness if you take it consistently. also, be prepared for headaches if you dont stay hydrated while taking it. its a good medicine. really no negative side effects, just don't take it everyday. ONLY for super anxiety situations.

[Turkish Republican]

I was about to open a topic like this, I have exactly the same questions as you.
I have very severe AA, it is so severe that I have never made a cold approach in my life. All of my bangs came from social circle and internet game.... My notch count is 17, 15 of them are from online game (Okcupid,Tinder,POF)

I don't think I'm socially awkward as I've had no problem bedding girls from online game... But I just can't seem to overcome this AA fear, I had severe trauma with a girl in my high school year which still prevents me from making cold approaches. I don't want to go to a psychiatrist.

I've used Addereall in my teenage years because I have ADD, I've also used Ritalin. These drugs make you more social, but I've never made a cold approach while I was on these drugs. However 2 days ago SWIY tried ecstacy with a group of friends at a party, and the trip was amazing! But the come down was very bad. I want to know as well if there are any legal drugs which help with AA. I can get any legal drug without a problem, my cousin is a doctor and has the necessary connections.

Definitely MDMA and other types are out of question because I will be travelling around SEA, I don't want to end up in a Thai prison.

[Zona]

I sympathize with you guys because I'm in the same boat with the anxiety issues. I've had them in one form or another ever since I was a kid. I also know exactly what you mean about being confident, yet still suffering from anxiety. I'm a naturally confident guy, yet my body sometimes responds to minor issues in an extreme way. A situation that would cause a bit of nervousness for most people might trigger my body's fight or flight response (conversely, I seem to do well when there is some sort of actual threat...go figure). It's a real bitch when, intellectually, you know that the feelings aren't warranted, but you continue to feel them anyway.

As for drugs, I don't know much about beta blockers, but I would definitely caution against going the benzo route. I can tell you from personal experience that it is extremely easy to develop a dependence on them, and trying to come off when you are addicted is horrible. If you do end up using them, I would do so very sparingly, and only in situations that provoke extreme anxiety. I would not use them for every day, general anxiety. You'd be better off making lifestyle changes to lower your overall stress. SSRIs did nothing for me, and often come with a bunch of negative side effects (loss of libido, apathy, etc.)

It sounds like beta blockers work, at least with the physical symptoms (which should alleviate some of the mental symptoms), so why not just stick with those?

Also, I think that the best non-drug solution to overcome it is through exposure and working through the issues themselves. No, I'm not just saying that you need to "man up" (trust me, I know how difficult the situation is). I've been delving into cognitive behavioral therapy lately, and so far I can see how it might be beneficial. It helps you to discover the cognitive distortions that are the root causes of your issues. Then you can deal with those ideas or beliefs, which will in turn lessen your anxiety. Might be another tool that's worth looking into, although it probably won't be a quick fix.

[LINUX]

I'll tell you my experience with these drugs. But I don't have anxiety issues.

I was prescribed propranalol a few years ago for college football season. At the time I couldn't watch college football without breaking something or throwing something across the room. Playing ball myself, it was very difficult for me to watch certain routes being ran and defenses being played without criticizing someone. I don't remember how much I was presribed but I remember I was taking four pills before the games and they didn't do a damn thing for me. So don't put too much hope into those.

As far as adderall, I think that is going to make your anxiety worse. I don't think kicking up your sympathetic nervous system is in your best interest.


Here is a question. Do you have social anxiety when you're around one woman in a closed off environment or is it anxiety of the unknown when in large groups? I can offer some suggestions on how to tweak your game to your personality type.

[jake1720]

It works amazingly for AA. I have used it in the past.

[Phoenix]

I think this is only a western thing. The idea that all of life's natural discomforts need to be medicated away. How many people thought like that 30 years ago?

I forgot which thread, but someone posted recently about talking to a Russian/Ukraine player at a bar, and complaining about his approach anxiety to him. The Russian's response was something along the lines of "so what? we all have that, get on with it".

Failure to approach is not caused by a deficient intake of drugs. Are you going to walk around carrying a sack of all the drugs you need to cope with a normal life? What you need is to chug a nice cup of cement and harden up.

I also don't care that you don't want a lecture, you're getting it anyway because you need it. Hope it doesn't trigger you, lest you have to take your expensive 'I got lectured on the internet even when I asked them not to' pills to cope with the discomfort.

Practical advice:
- When you feel discomfort during an approach, do it anyway. It fades a bit each time until it's quite minor.
- Practice going into bars alone and just chilling at the bar by yourself. It feels weird to begin with, but eventually feels as normal as going to a shop.
- Find other groups of people (such as local 'pickup lairs', or meetups with people from RVF or similar) who expect dudes to approach. I've seen firsthand the peer pressure of being in such a group compel soft men to approach. It seems the inbuilt peer pressure from the group cancels out the anxiety of approaching. Do approach: maybe the girl rejects you, Don't approach: the guys definitely reject you.

[Cheetah]

Quote:

I also don't care that you don't want a lecture, you're getting it anyway because you need it. Hope it doesn't trigger you, lest you have to take your expensive 'I got lectured on the internet even when I asked them not to' pills to cope with the discomfort.

[Cheetah]

jbkunt2, what exactly is it that you fear?

Most girls seem to appreciate being approached even if they wouldn't be interested. Yeah, a tiny minority might try to be bitchy but that is actually a little against the social norms, being bitchy towards someone that wasn't rude or bitchy towards her. Just call her out on it and move forward.

As to your dates, if she showed up to the date it was for a reason. Don't treat it very differently from when you were out with your pervious LTR.

Is it out of the question to tell her about your rosacea if you start blushing a lot? It might make the situation a little bit less awkward?

[Cheetah]

Quote:

Here is a question. Do you have social anxiety when you're around one woman in a closed off environment or is it anxiety of the unknown when in large groups? I can offer some suggestions on how to tweak your game to your personality type.

I'm obviously not the OP but you, or anyone else, don't happen to have any tips of overcoming the feeling of discomfort - if the girl is actually showing strong IOI or when you talk to her she is starting to act as she is really interested?

I have no problem to approach or initiate social conversations but I might feel uncomfortable if she is actually interested and I am supposed to take it further than a polite conversation. It's kinda strange, and it has happened that I just bailed from the situation.

It's not my intention to hijack the thread but it might be related even if not for the same reason.

[gmoneysauce]

(09-19-2015 10:43 AM)Phoenix Wrote:  

Failure to approach is not caused by a deficient intake of drugs. Are you going to walk around carrying a sack of all the drugs you need to cope with a normal life? What you need is to chug a nice cup of cement and harden up.

I also don't care that you don't want a lecture, you're getting it anyway because you need it. Hope it doesn't trigger you, lest you have to take your expensive 'I got lectured on the internet even when I asked them not to' pills to cope with the discomfort.

Practical advice:
- When you feel discomfort during an approach, do it anyway. It fades a bit each time until it's quite minor.
- Practice going into bars alone and just chilling at the bar by yourself. It feels weird to begin with, but eventually feels as normal as going to a shop.
- Find other groups of people (such as local 'pickup lairs', or meetups with people from RVF or similar) who expect dudes to approach. I've seen firsthand the peer pressure of being in such a group compel soft men to approach. It seems the inbuilt peer pressure from the group cancels out the anxiety of approaching. Do approach: maybe the girl rejects you, Don't approach: the guys definitely reject you.

Phoenix has a point here. What he is describing has been called 'Exposure Therapy' and has merit. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Exposure_therapy

Exposure therapy fucking works. But it only works if you continue the exposure.

I have had some anxiety and so I do very specific things to lower my baseline anxiety level.

1. Rock climbing routes above my level where I will have falls. (three times a week)
2. Swimming in cold lakes/water (this is like a fucking magic pill), also cold showers.
3. Plan to engage in things like approaches that will cause me anxiety.
4. Sprinting
5. Lifting weights (for me I do an intense kettle bell set to music and then scream)

I actually do not have approach anxiety at all but I do have closing anxiety so I will approach women, make jokes but not get the number.

I have also used NLP techniques and Tony Robbins NAC stuff to good success. I did the firewalking thing and it removed almost all anxiety for a number of months.

G

[Gorgiass]

(09-19-2015 10:43 AM)Phoenix Wrote:  

I think this is only a western thing. The idea that all of life's natural discomforts need to be medicated away. How many people thought like that 30 years ago?

I first learned about Propranolol for anxiety from "Life Extension" which was published more than 35 years ago. Also there's that universal anxiolytic alcohol which almost every person in almost every culture enjoys and has been around a few years longer than that.

Every person is different, some literally can't grab their balls and do it anyway without training wheels just like some people would faint from fear and fall to their death if you put them on a plank 100' in the air. You need to be able to get a handle on the extreme physiological symptoms to be able to effectively address the psychological ones.

Anyway, there's a huge thread on phenibut here, great stuff, do a search. Another I've had luck with is Tianeptine, gives a nice glow for a few hours too, longer if you use the acid rather than sodium and a higher dose. Some people have luck with kratom as well. All the above have potential for dependency and withdrawal.

[Hafran]

I can relate to OP myself as in some situations I experience extreme blushing and it can be very embarrassing (I don't know if it's rosacea or something else, but I imagine it's similar symptoms). It happens in situations where I am stressed and it is very warm. Typically a house party with alcool, heating, and bright lights is the worst scenario for me.

The approach I have taken is to plan my dates outside in the terrace of the bar if it's not too cold. If it's very warm outside, then go inside and sit by the aircon. Basically, as long as it's chilly, the blushing will rarely occur.

Second thing I'd like to add, is that it has gotten a lot better for me over the years, and I never took any medication to control it. I don't think my skin has gotten better, but I have become more confident during dates, and it has a been a while since I last had an embarrassing blushing during a date.

So I'm sure drugs can help on the short term, but on the long term, there's only one way to improve our situation, and it is to confront enough stressful situations to the point where they don't seem stressful at all anymore.

[jbkunt2]

Thought I'd update to say Propranolol has proven pretty useful once in a while for going out an approaching. I'd take it at least 90 mins before drinking. Controls a lot of the physical symptoms.

Worth a go to get a few numbers once in a while.

[jake1720]

I used propanolol in my early days of gaming to get over AA. Benzos too in my early college years.

They help reduce the anxiety so when you are not on them you know how to act and are less nervous. They definitely help if you still have massive approach anxiety.

[Cortés]

Very interesting. I have moderate social anxiety, and also sometimes make awkward movements and other shit like that. I also have pretty bad blushing on my face, as well as high blood pressure and frequent shortness of breath. And coincidentally, I went to the doctors today and the doctors insisted it was my creatine doing all this shit . I'll look into Propranalol, as all of the symptoms that this treats are things I struggle with daily.

[NovaVirtu]

Try Kratom.

It makes you feel very peaceful, disinhibited and relaxed with people. To me at least, it feels kind of like the positive effects of alcohol without becoming drunk or getting a hangover.

I tried the sample kit from happy hippo (Chris from Good Looking Loser sells that brand). There are other sites that are cheaper but this is the only brand I have tried since it was recommended by Victor Pride.

(I have no relation to either of those sites, I just dig the stuff). Good luck.