[Adrenaline]

The harsh reality is females are shallow, especially at your age, and especially in the venues I assume you're gaming in. You'll never beat someone who is insta-famous for their looks with girls up to the age of 25, even with the best game in the world (unless said guy is a COMPLETE social retard). The only solution is to cut him off and begin gaming with guys on or below your level of attractiveness or even better, gaming solo.

Got a photo of this guy, or someone who looks similar? Curious to see what the big deal is. How tall is he? Is he built? Is it just a handsome face? I usually get a lot of attention with passive game, but your description of his passive game sounds whole another level.

[HankMoody]

(08-13-2015 05:26 PM)Travesty Wrote:  

(08-13-2015 03:50 PM)HankMoody Wrote:  

If you're 5'5, a bit chubby, but have a lot of game, you still can't realistically expect to slay dimes on the regular. It is what it is.

I just want to mention I see this time an again guys listing height and body shape as the bigger attraction factor examples.

Face is the most important by FAR, the only hold against that is if you are under 5'8" even then though you could still kill it with the majority of chicks with great looks.

That is just the truth.

Eh. Some girls like tall guys, some girls like thick guys.

I only date really short girls.

[scorpion]

(08-13-2015 09:32 PM)The_e_man Wrote:  

Scorpion - Your post is the slap in the face that I desperately need.
I'll even go as far as to admit I receive more pleasure from the ego validation of sex then the actual act of sex itself. Everytime I get a new notch, I feel a rush of endorphins and euphoria and a heightened sense of well-being. I feel as if I conquered a dragon.
Once my dick is inside of a woman, I almost no longer care past that point as it is now an official notch and I have "won."

I am rooting too much of my own sense of self-worth in my success with women.
How does one stop this though? I have a very high sex drive and beautiful girls are constantly on my mind.

As I said, you're a victim of your own success. This actually happens to a lot of guys once they develop solid game - they get addicted to the thrill of successfully bedding new women. And that's what you are right now - an addict. You're addicted to the thrill of chasing strange pussy. I know exactly how you feel because I've been there myself.

The first thing you need to do is pat yourself on the back. You've got very good game. You have nothing to prove to anyone, including yourself. You have no more need to play the notch game from here on out. Your new focus should be quality over quantity. Whether you want to build a harem, engage in mini-LTRs or aim for a LTR with one chick is up to you, but you're at the point where additional numbers will do nothing for you.

This new mindset should help you shift your focus away from relentlessly gaming for new notches to improving yourself as a man in order to attract more quality women. Hit the gym hard. Take acting/improv/dancing classes. Learn to play guitar/sing and start a local band. Work on building an impressive network of social and professional contacts. Take up boxing or MMA. Acquire valuable professional skills that will enable you to make good money while enjoying your career. Think about where you want to be in your life ten years from now at 32, and then twenty years from now at 42. Become the man you want to be. You have to put in the work. You can do it. You put in the work to get good at game and achieved success. Now you need to apply the same dedication to achieving success as a man in general.

[BossOfBosses]

Let's not also forget that a large component of being "good looking" is simply being well built and well groomed. Look at the guy who was in guardians of the galaxy. All of a sudden he's a sex symbol, where before he was fat and getting shitty movie roles.

Most popular actors are not only short but start out with all kinds of physical flaws.

[Gixxy]

I just want to encourage you to take a step back and reflect. You're 22. 50+ notches is impressive. That aside, you've been working game like a job for 5+ years. Burn out is real. You have to take a break from your work occasionally to find new ideas, new paths, and new challenges.

Just some food for thought:
- You're young. Life is long. But oh so very precious. Enjoy it. Tap into the things that you are passionate about and pursue those things. With vigor.
- Set new goals. You're plateaued right now. Set your sights on the next mountain, but understand that there is a valley in between where you are, and where you want to be. Pursuing your passions will make the valley seem smaller/shorter.
- Stay in your own lane, focus on your own race. Staring at the people around you will only slow you down.
- Success is a journey, not a destination. The journey is long.
- Find your path. Like Scorpion said,

Quote:

Stop thinking that the meaning of life is hidden between a woman's legs. It's not.

This couldn't be any more true. Fucking endless numbers of women is an empty endeavor if you don't know where you are going and what you want.

Honestly, I'm glad that you posted this. You need some perspective because you've lost sight of what is important; your own growth and development. Enjoy the journey.

[TonySandos]

I'm he not only posted, but that when I posted my response and the page refreshed, Scorpion had replied with similar advice including some better, detailed remarks. You did need a slap in the face E_man because this issue can mean a long road down aimless hedonism, like chasing the first high. That lacking of mission can turn a man of good character into something else. Bless you Scorpion for not pulling any punches

[Roardog]

(08-13-2015 07:20 PM)The_e_man Wrote:  

(08-13-2015 05:14 PM)Travesty Wrote:  

The OP doesn't like this because to him he has made Game such a center piece of his life that it is like he spent 10 years learning guitar practicing all the time and his friend comes up picks up a guitar and out does him with having never played before. That's life.

Absolutely spot on. Exactly how I'm feeling right now, really disheartening.

I know how the OP feels. One of my best mates is 6'4", alpha and good looking. Girls look at him wherever we go and I've walked into bars/clubs behind him and seen all the girls turn and look at him and then come over to hit on him. He is aware of game but he's not particularly good at it because he doesn't need to be, girls throw themselves at him.
It's hard not to be jealous of someone like that when you're studying game, busting your balls at work and the gym to be the best man you can be, but then still can't pull the kinds of girls he does on a regular basis.

However in the end you have to realise that's life and it's not an equal playing field and you have to make the most of the hand you're dealt. The sooner you realise that and come to terms with it the happier you will be.

I know that's easier said than done and sometimes if I have a bad night I'll still find myself falling into the trap of "If only I was better looking", "if only I was taller", "if only I was richer", etc. But you have to shake that off, keep moving forward and working on being the best you that you can be.

[TonySandos]

Why not just let it fall into the realm of "this is what destiny intended"? Never assume that just because conclusion didn't fall in line with your expectations that good fortunes have passed you up.

[Phoenix]

I might add that at 22, you're probably not at peak attractiveness if you're engaged in self-improvement. I remember guys around 21 who used to be the guy who could get any girl, who've now dropped off the map in mid or late twenties. Now isn't the time to worry. If you pass 30 and you're a loser, that's a fair cause to worry. Focus on personal growth, your rank will improve, and the hotter girls will open up.

[not-a-pua]

You are friends with a pussy magnet - he can't bang ALL the girls.
Run solid game, get the fall out pussy.
I listened to Howard Stern in the past. He talked to John Stamos a lot, and this guy seems like your friend. Minimum effort, constant flow of pussy. I thought it must be great to be friends with Stamos. No work needed, girls come over and start communicating. He can't handle all the attention.

[H1N1]

Some awesome advice from the guys here OP. I want to preface my post by saying please don't think I'm hating on you, I've got a fraction of your notch count, and in some respects being more like you would give my own life greater balance.

The guys are absolutely spot on that your problem is that you're building an extremely trivial life for yourself here. If you think about it, you are spending all of your time and energy and purpose chasing something inconsequential - these girls must be inconsequential or it wouldn't be so easy to move on to the next one.

When you actually stop, and break it down, you are building your life around chasing the unimportant, defining yourself by irrelevant victories that don't contribute to any meaningful personal success. You are actively trying to become an inconsequential man, by prioritising worthless things.

The whole 'I can't stop thinking about my dick' thing is childish. It's like shrieking 'I wanna play with my toy, I wanna play with my toy'. The problem, as you describe it, seems to be that you don't have any adult purpose, and consequentially, you're stuck living the life of an indulged man-child. Spending the majority of your free hours chasing women is an unimaginative use of a life. Like any skill, to start with you have to put in the time to achieve competence, but now that you have it, you have the opportunity to move on and find something significant to do with your life. You feel shattered that this guy makes little effort and out pulls you. How can you not feel shattered that everywhere you go there are guys who have out-learned you, who out-understand you, who out-fight you, who out-work you - everywhere you look in the past 100 years of human history there are extraordinary men making meaningful contributions to the sum total of human knowledge, and the cause of your greatest shame is that someone can out-shag you? It may be time to reassess your priorities.

[Blackwell]

Great thread lots to take in. I think I'll have to come back to it one day.

But I ain't tired of banging sluts just yet.

Can't say much more than what's already been said. Good luck to you OP. Let us know how you get on making the transition from quantity to quality.

Being a man is a lot more than trying to chase down the next wet coochie to slip your dick in. It's fun sure but you can destroy the value of anything if you abuse it.

[Natural Born Gyalist]

Read your signature OP. Your answer is right there. You can't change your looks tongue extent that you will get approached like your friend. I knew a guy like that, once in my late teens. I always thought he looked kind of like a horse or some sort of Labrador retriever. I achieved fame game in my twenties that allowed me to slay better quality and way more quantity. Trust me these guys always get tied down by an aggressive 7-8, and eventually end up alone, with no game, after their looks fade. I wouldn't wing with the guy personally because it will eventually make you bitter. How do you day game with a wing? I can't imagine how that works. Wings are for nighttime.

[Sonsowey]

I'm not very good looking, and somewhat of an introvert, and I've always disliked night game for the reasons the OP has laid out.

For this reason I've mainly done online and day game. When you meet a girl sober, your personality, confidence, game, cool stories, everything that you have worked on developing by studying Game, is on display. It stands out so much more that you can be charming and cool dead sober one-on-one with a girl. Even for sluts who have been with tons of guys, it's nearly guaranteed that they have mostly been drunken hookups, and you will stand out for having a cool personality during the day. I have been with gorgeous girls that pre-Game I never thought I would have a shot with, and mostly on dates that start at a park or walking around a cool area of the city. Many of these dates have been same day lays where it's like, start at a cafe, wander around a park, kiss in the park, go to a music shop, play some guitar, invite them back to my place, bang.

I don't think if you're having bad luck in bars you need to keep gaming in bars. Looks really are very important during the night as you've seen. This isn't to say Game is worthless, you're well on your way to 100 notches, I just think guys who are not that good looking have a comparative advantage in day game where you're displaying value for more than just your looks.

[Akwesi]

I get a strong sense that you are a perfectionist: you study game and practice game obsessively, you won't count the subpar girls you've banged as notches (own those porkers, man, it's all part of the game), you are worried about your boy playing on easy mode despite the fact that you are killing it out there. Perfectionism can be a character flaw to the extent that it causes paralysis and lack of action. I think your crisis is rooted in a (most likely subconscious) desire to get out of moving forward because your game will never be perfect. Don't give in.

The fact that you are having success is probably also giving you a strong sense of entitlement, raising your expectations to unreasonable levels. This is good to the extent that it promotes the kind of irrational confidence women fall for, but is has some downsides as well. I have noticed that sometimes when I am doing well I start feeling jealous every time I see a hot girl with another guy - why isn't that bitch with me? Why isn't every hot bitch with me? In reality, the envy and jealousy you are feeling are results of success, not products of failure. Game has worked tremendously for you and it will continue to do so. What your bro does is neither here nor there.

[mpr]

Quote:

Anyways, almost every set I open the girls end up giving all the attention to him

Why are you going out hunting poon with a guy that is significantly better looking then you? You're kneecapping yourself by bringing Chad Thundercock along with you, then doing all of the introduction work for him. I prefer to be more of a lone wolf. But if I were to bring a wingman they'd have to be roughly of equal or lesser attractiveness to me.

Quote:

I'd probably be at 3-4 notches and stuck in a shitty one-sided LTR if it weren't for game.

So by your own admission you've done roughly 1,300% [51/4] better with women then you would have without game. What are you complaining about again?

Quote:

It's just shattering to my paradigm seeing this guy have everything handed to him on a silver platter with absolutely zero application of game or effort (apart from showing up).

That's how the world works my friend. Some people are more fortunate then you, some people are less fortunate. All in all you're not doing too bad. You could have been born in the Sudan where your biggest worry would be finding enough food to survive, or how to avoid being murdered by government militias. If your biggest concern is that you have to put in a little bit of effort to bang an 8-10 then life isn't too bad.

[Malo]

OP sounds like you're pumping the girls up to buying temperature with your game, and once they're getting warmed up your good looking guy shows up and rips the rewards.

I used to have this too - had an extremely good looking friend, but I would do all the game. Then he would just pop up say hi and get all the attention.

There's no denying that looks are a super power when it comes to attracting girls, but the fact was that he could hardly ever pull anyone on his own. So I would basically 'do the game for him', then he'll show up with his 'super power' and leave me empty handed.

If that's the dynamics between you too then don't hang out with him for pickup. That's what I did.

A good dynamics would be that you both acknowledge that 'you got the game, he got the looks' and team up to have it work for the benefit of both of you. E.g. once a girl switches over to him, he uses his 'super powers' to make sure her friend goes with you.

That's teamwork. Otherwise he's just a leech. Go with him to watch a sports match over a beer, not to pick up girls.

[The Wire]

(08-13-2015 02:16 PM)The_e_man Wrote:  

I have invested so much time and effort into game just to have my paradigm shattered by a good looking guy who gets girls to throw themselves at him with absolutely no effort on his part.
Surely someone else on this forum has had experience with a friend like this and can chime in with some insight. I could really use some insight on this, brothers, because I want to keep moving forward but this stupid hang-ups I have about looks is really starting to bother me.

haha didn't Tyler go on some rant about looks not mattering on the Blueprint Decoded video.

Anyway I'm not sure really whats the issue. You got a reality check. An analogy would be fighting and lets say your sensei(Tyler Durden in game) told you size and strength doesn't matter and that it all came down to 'skill'(game in our case). Then you got into a fight with a 6'4" 250lb super athlete with no fighting background who plays starting line for Ohio state football and you got your ass handed to you. It's a reality check. It doesn't mean all of your martial training is bullshit but it does mean that it isn't enough at this point in your young life to overcome someone with natural size and strength. Its the same shit with your friend.

What are your options? Would have you been better off without game? Its like a bitching about someone with an IQ of 180 not having to study in college and getting better grades than you.

[mpr]

Quote:

If I have a bad night I'll still find myself falling into the trap of "If only I was better looking", "if only I was taller", "if only I was richer", etc. But you have to shake that off, keep moving forward and working on being the best you that you can be.

It's also important to remember that you can improve on most of these things. Not good enough looking? Hit the gym, learn more about style and upgrade your wardrobe. Not rich enough? Improve your career prospects. If you believe you've hit a point of diminishing returns learning game, you can always redirect some of that effort into raising your SMV.

[xxMarco]

A lot of us have been in your shoes OP. When my highschool girlfriend dumped me I started obsessing over game. I was reading so many game books, hitting the gym, buying new clothes, going out every weekend. I started getting laid with average girls.
A friend of mine started hanging out with me and girls would approach him. He was turning girls down left and right. It was insane.
Eventually I figured out not to wing with people more attractive than you.
Now my game is pretty good and my social skills have greatly improved. I'm still lifting, reading, and trying to progress my career. Those skills that I acquired trying to slay so much pussy over The years has made me a better person today. I don't really go out and game as much but I do have that option if I choose.

A lot of the advice in this thread is spot on and I don't have to repeat it. I wish I had this forum back then when I slipped into a sort of depression that my game wasn't as tight as I thought. A lot of it is also learning through your experiences, being 22 you have a lot of adventures and growth up ahead.

[Mister X]

I've been around dudes like that and I guess there's two schools of thought. Some may argue, keep them around, learn from them, and hope that some of the pussy trickles down to you. And others may say being around guys like that does more harm than good. I'd go with the latter.

Firstly, I felt that a lot of those dudes who just had pussy handed to them didn't really have an explanation as to why that was. They didn't know game, they didn't have theories. They were just naturally attractive to women. Not only that, but it just was fucking with my psyche. To work smarter and harder, but continue to come up short against those dudes just jaded me.

I don't have wings, or single friends that I roll with, and at my age (27) a lot of guys are in long terms or outright married. I roll alone. Always. I don't roll with dudes who can out game me, I don't roll with guys who may make me look better. I game alone. In my reality, I'm the only guy that matters. All wins and losses are on me.

As far as the game/looks thing - I'd say it depends on the girl quite honestly. As jaded as I may be at times, I still have seen enough to know that there are girls out there (the only girls worth fucking with) who take your entire character, who you are as a whole into account when it comes to attraction.

If you're smarter, funnier, more confident, more interesting, more stylish, have more game overall, and she goes with the dude who's taller and/or better looking, there's not much you can do. Chalk it up to her being shallow and move on to the next one.

[Adrenaline]

I still don't comprehend why is height always talked up as being in the same league as looks in terms of attracting girls. Unless you're trying to date an Olympic basketball it shouldn't even be a factor, and men put far more emphasis on judging other males by height than woman do.

You're getting destroyed by these guys because of their face and/or body, not their height.

[LAX]

OP your investment is driving you crazy.

- stop being OCD over the science and education of game. Remember the fundamentals and focus your drive on endevours that will grow you as a person or make you independently wealthy
- stop going out with Mr local celebrity. You are in Edmonton. If this guy was in a major city or was over 25 no one would give a fuck. He won the genetic lottery. Don't put yourself in disheartening situations unless he wings with you and you get a piece of the action (entourage game)
- since you have a phd in game now use that knowledge to contribute here. Start with explaining how you got to 51 girls in 5 years for newbies in the newbies section and give back. Volunteering will grow you in a positive way

Being jealous of your friend is like being jealous of a NFL athlete in a bar. You cant do shit about it so try and accept it. Where do you want to be 5 years from now? Get there

[The_e_man]

Brothers, thank you for the humbling and sobering words.
This is exactly what I needed to hear, though it's not easy to swallow.

Please keep the posts coming. I enjoy hearing everyones insights and thoughts into this. It has become a much more deeper discussion than me simply being a sad little bitch about not being a good-looking god who has women throw themselves at him.

[Merenguero]

I haven't even read the thread, but if O.P. has 51 notches at age 22, he has absolutely nothing to worry about or complain about.