Thanks for the criticism, and you're right about leading conversations. I didn't want to have some wall-of-text post filled with personal bullshit, but I understand how that context would be important. Reviewed the "forum troll" page a couple times before posting, but figured I needed to hash something out and take action.
I'm genetically gifted, in ways - IQ ~ 125, 6 foot tall white male, athletic build, not balding - probably a 7-8 by most women's standards, not accounting for low paying job and inconsistent confidence (ADD, depression - diagnoses that I've figured to be at least part bullshit) - but talking to / approaching women has always been a hard thing for me to parse. I've usually managed to "pull" women by being attractive, intelligent, stoic, and funny in circumstances I often had little control over - attractive, sexually aggressive 6's and 7's usually sought me out with little energy investment on my end.
After a couple terrible relationships, and failed online approaches at higher SMV girls, I hit an obvious wall. Found Heartiste and Rational Male, and started casually observing female social dynamics at my office job. This last week, I gamed a girl I knew in college via facebook into meeting up. My text game with this girl was going pretty well, so initially I had her offering to meet at her place, or come out to mine. I ended up fucking up the date by being open about my low-profile work / life experience, and she's hardly returning texts at this point.
With every failure, it's becoming clear that I need to start hammering away at pure cold approach game, and stop clinging to the past. I'm being a bitch and having a hard time getting outside of my own head. Tonight I went out to a bar, enjoyed some scotch, and talked to a dude about getting a job bouncing at a nearby bar.
For reference, here's the chick:
http://www.nytimes.com/2015/04/19/fashio...nting.html