[solipsis85]

Long time no see might be the first thing I tell them.

Now a little bit of context : I'm 29 yo and I currently have a huge approach anxiety issue. I'm fed up of meeting girls online, the girls that gives me eye contact and smile at me in the subway are much hotter than the girls who answer me on dating websites. It seems like daygame might improve drastically the quality of the girls I pull.

I tried day game a few times with friends in the past, then a serious depression got the best of me, I recently recovered, I am now in the process of self improvement.

This topic will be my approach diary, there will be no lies, this topic makes me accountable, if by the end of the week I haven't approached anyone then it will mean I really have no balls.

My advantages : I'm rather tall (183cm), I look ok (I'm no brad pitt but I'm above average). I would look better if I lifted seriously. When I'm really relaxed, I have a deep voice that got complimented by a few girls in intimate moments.

Weak point : I'm very shy, when I'm outside of my comfort zone my voice get high pitched, I don't speak loud enough. I'm very low energy. I have a very bad logistic (I live with a roommate in the suburb of Paris, hopefluly I will be living in Paris by the end of this year).

The last few days I took the habit of saying gentle jokes or comments at random people in everyday situations (woman in the train, cashier, store employee, etc). It's funny how easy it is to make most people smile, even though a minority are not responding at all.

So... here I am, meanwhile I'm eagerly reading other daygame diaries, those are really interesting and gives me a great sense of not being alone to struggle in this area.

[JoeChange]

Well at least you are living in one of the best cities to day game, there are tonnes of hot women unlike most smaller towns...

[Atlantic]

Read up on Giovinny. He posts here on the forum and has a lot of great day game material.

Also check out the approach thread in the game section.

[Dusty]

Check out this thread OP, to learn a proven system for overcoming anxiety (including approach anxiety) and depression.

(03-16-2015 05:24 PM)solipsis85 Wrote:  

This topic will be my approach diary, there will be no lies, this topic makes me accountable, if by the end of the week I haven't approached anyone then it will mean I really have no balls.

This is the type of self defeating thinking you need to fix. I don't think shaming yourself and putting yourself down is a very effective motivator.

You say you are young, tall and good looking ...that gives you a huge edge. Learn psychological/emotional stength and you are well on your way to slaying some serious pussy.

[ordinaryleastsquared]

Hey OP: I'm almost in the exact same boat as you, same age, height, etc. I realized recenlty that relying on online game, as I have been, is the biggest limiting factor in the quality of girls I date. And so far day game has been my albatross.

Night game out with friends and drinks, I approach like a machine. Online, once I meet up with girl in real life, its seemless at this point and I convert a majority of 1st dates, but again the quality is generally lower than I expect. Out and about by myself during the day, I have no game. My energy level isn't usually that high and I rarely feel like making conversation beyond pleasant niceities with anyone.

This weekend I decided to drop all my plates (who I met online) and make my focus day game and solo night game.. converting in these environments is really what game is all about, and developing an iron sense of self that can take rejections. It's scary, but its the next step, the only way to really grow myself. Good luck, I'm right there with you.

[Travesty]

^ Yeah day game is like ripping the covers off that you're using to hide from the boogeyman, then going under the bed to beat the shit out of him. It's a different level in difficulty.

There is no computer screen alcohol, drugs, dim lights, or exciting surroundings to help you deal with rejection.

Also day gaming often takes much better timing and pacing abilities just to approach at the right second (faking phone calls and whatnot so you can serendipituously delay the right amount of time to get by girl to approach her) unlike night game where you often just literally and physically bump into prospects.

[solipsis85]

Thank you all for your input, I'll definitely check the cited threads, also this "guide to rational living" book seems really interesting.

I came to the same conclusions about online game: daygame is the way to go. Also it seems like online dating is more likely to bring girls with a lot of attitude. Of course daygame is much more challenging, but that's part of what makes it exciting, I see it as a way to stand out, right at the beginning the girl sees that you are brave, and that's attractive.

Oh and I'd like to precise that I'm not crazy good looking, just slightly above average compared to people of my age I think, I got really better when I took the decision to cut my hair really short, that was a game changer for some reason. I'm planning to get bigger for the summer, or at least to get a better definition.

Summer is arriving fast, and with it entire cars of tourists coming from the USA, Russia, EE, SA, etc... including many women who come here alone and expecting to have a fling in Paris. Let's get ready. (Paris is never talked about here for some reasons, but I know few other cities with so many foreign girls on their own for a short period of time, looking for NSA interactions, I'm not sure but I have the impression that women tourists outnumber men tourists)

[solipsis85]

(03-16-2015 08:13 PM)Dusty Wrote:  

(03-16-2015 05:24 PM)solipsis85 Wrote:  

This topic will be my approach diary, there will be no lies, this topic makes me accountable, if by the end of the week I haven't approached anyone then it will mean I really have no balls.

This is the type of self defeating thinking you need to fix. I don't think shaming yourself and putting yourself down is a very effective motivator.

That's really true, I often caught myself in the middle of negative self talk. Something I have to deal with as well.

[TripleG]

(03-17-2015 02:35 AM)solipsis85 Wrote:  

Thank you all for your input, I'll definitely check the cited threads, also this "guide to rational living" book seems really interesting.

I came to the same conclusions about online game: daygame is the way to go. Also it seems like online dating is more likely to bring girls with a lot of attitude. Of course daygame is much more challenging, but that's part of what makes it exciting, I see it as a way to stand out, right at the beginning the girl sees that you are brave, and that's attractive.

Oh and I'd like to precise that I'm not crazy good looking, just slightly above average compared to people of my age I think, I got really better when I took the decision to cut my hair really short, that was a game changer for some reason. I'm planning to get bigger for the summer, or at least to get a better definition.

Summer is arriving fast, and with it entire cars of tourists coming from the USA, Russia, EE, SA, etc... including many women who come here alone and expecting to have a fling in Paris. Let's get ready. (Paris is never talked about here for some reasons, but I know few other cities with so many foreign girls on their own for a short period of time, looking for NSA interactions, I'm not sure but I have the impression that women tourists outnumber men tourists)

Disagree on that point. Online you immediately know if the girl is single or not, whether she has kids or not, her age, her education, and if she has a lengthy profile can know if she is a nutcase or not. You immediately get to filter for girls you think you will match up with the best!
Problem with day game, especially for us older guys (over 30+) is that too many times the women we approach end up being too young (sometimes these 18 year olds look like they are mid 20s however in my somewhat conservative city and circle of friends anything more than a 10 year age gap is unacceptable) or the dreaded boyfriend line comes up. Day game is very exhausting and conversion rates for most guys tend to be lower than via online game. All things being equal I still prefer to game girls via my smartphone and apps like Tinder vs nervously approaching cute girls only to find out that they give me the boyfriend excuse most times (usually I suspect they are lying but who am I to judge)

[Off The Reservation]

(03-19-2015 11:27 PM)TripleG Wrote:  

(03-17-2015 02:35 AM)solipsis85 Wrote:  

Thank you all for your input, I'll definitely check the cited threads, also this "guide to rational living" book seems really interesting.

I came to the same conclusions about online game: daygame is the way to go. Also it seems like online dating is more likely to bring girls with a lot of attitude. Of course daygame is much more challenging, but that's part of what makes it exciting, I see it as a way to stand out, right at the beginning the girl sees that you are brave, and that's attractive.

Oh and I'd like to precise that I'm not crazy good looking, just slightly above average compared to people of my age I think, I got really better when I took the decision to cut my hair really short, that was a game changer for some reason. I'm planning to get bigger for the summer, or at least to get a better definition.

Summer is arriving fast, and with it entire cars of tourists coming from the USA, Russia, EE, SA, etc... including many women who come here alone and expecting to have a fling in Paris. Let's get ready. (Paris is never talked about here for some reasons, but I know few other cities with so many foreign girls on their own for a short period of time, looking for NSA interactions, I'm not sure but I have the impression that women tourists outnumber men tourists)

Disagree on that point. Online you immediately know if the girl is single or not, whether she has kids or not, her age, her education, and if she has a lengthy profile can know if she is a nutcase or not. You immediately get to filter for girls you think you will match up with the best!
Problem with day game, especially for us older guys (over 30+) is that too many times the women we approach end up being too young (sometimes these 18 year olds look like they are mid 20s however in my somewhat conservative city and circle of friends anything more than a 10 year age gap is unacceptable) or the dreaded boyfriend line comes up. Day game is very exhausting and conversion rates for most guys tend to be lower than via online game. All things being equal I still prefer to game girls via my smartphone and apps like Tinder vs nervously approaching cute girls only to find out that they give me the boyfriend excuse most times (usually I suspect they are lying but who am I to judge)

TripleG you are daygaming in the wrong places
I find it much more interesting and much more rewarding than online.

[456]

As TripleG points out, online filters for "available" girls.

However, in-person game filters for girls who give us VISCERAL REACTIONS causing us to approach.

What's better:

3 x [online girl who is unlikely to look as good in person as in photos, who I may not have chosen to approach in real life, who I may not be super proud to show off, frame is that "we swiiiped each other"]

or

1 x [offline girl whose very physical essence inspired me to bold action, frame is "I saw her and made her mine"]

?

Having eschewed online for day/evening/sidewalk game (NYC) for years, with brief exceptions, my online girls have had a ceiling of 7.0, and my real-life girlshave had an absolute floor of 7.5, on my personal scale (face, body, personality, sexiness).

Real-life is a much more efficient filter in some ways.