[robreke]

Do any of you guys do this?

This could apply to the street or a girl you just noticed walking away towards the exit in a store or place you're in.....and there's only limited time to approach.

For me, this particularly applies to one bookstore I hangout in. Often, I'll spot a hot girl checking out buying a book. There are one of two ways she can exit the store after buying her book. I usually hang near the checkout line hopeing to walk out when she does and if I try to predict the left one ....she usually goes to the right.

This will take her on a long walk through the bookstore to the opposite exit, leaving me in the dust. At this point, the only way is to approach her from behind and do direct. There's not enough time to get in front of her and walk past her as that would look weird.

I've been letting these women go as I perceive approaching from behind would creep her out too much. I'd reserve this only for the hottest girls ( like the one I let go today)

Let these chicks walk or approach?

Anyone do this with success in these situations?

[CleanSlate]

Every time I approach from behind, she gets startled and the whole thing is ruined. I'm sure there are a few who can pull it off, but I've never been able to. Would be interested to see what others say.

[Sensei Creation]

When I approach from behind I lightly place my hand on her upper back and say " Excuse me "

If she jumps or is startled I simply say " I'm sorry I didn't mean to startle/scare you , but I saw you other there and I you seemed cute so I had to come and say Hi "

Then I proceed as usual .

[LINUX]

I never do this. I was reading a book about NLP and PTSD some time ago when I was trying to figure out PTSD. It had something to do with sensory modalities and kinestetic sensory inputs invoked by being touched regarding people with sexual trauma.

If you take a man or woman who was raped or molested as a child for example, anytime they were touched a certain way, unexpectedly, the neurons would fire in their brain and it would invoke that same feeling of when he or she was assaulted. I've always kept that in mind, so I never touch anyone at a bar whether I'm talking to a woman or asking a man to use his lighter, unless they can see that I am about to touch them. I use this same method when I'm in the gym but in a different context. I can go from thinking about life and what I'm going to do tomorrow to complete blocking it out when I slap my right shoulder, everything goes blank and all I'm focused on is the lift. It's the same concept. Conditioning those pathways. It takes a lot of time for a rape victim to recondition those pathways, and the truth is, you never know what man or woman was raped or assaulted as a child and touching a random person without them seeing you is never smart.

[robreke]

(02-23-2015 04:17 PM)LINUX Wrote:  

I never do this. I was reading a book about NLP and PTSD some time ago when I was trying to figure out PTSD. It had something to do with sensory modalities and kinestetic sensory inputs invoked by being touched regarding people with sexual trauma.

If you take a man or woman who was raped or molested as a child for example, anytime they were touched a certain way, unexpectedly, the neurons would fire in their brain and it would invoke that same feeling of when he or she was assaulted. I've always kept that in mind, so I never touch anyone at a bar whether I'm talking to a woman or asking a man to use his lighter, unless they can see that I am about to touch them. I use this same method when I'm in the gym but in a different context. I can go from thinking about life and what I'm going to do tomorrow to complete blocking it out when I slap my right shoulder, everything goes blank and all I'm focused on is the lift. It's the same concept. Conditioning those pathways. It takes a lot of time for a rape victim to recondition those pathways, and the truth is, you never know what man or woman was raped or assaulted as a child and touching a random person without them seeing you is never smart.

^ This makes sense. Pickup can be "rude" enough as it is in terms of regular social convention. That unseen touch from behind could be pushing the boundaries of decorum and taste

what about walking up behind and just kind of alongside and saying "excuse me" in a clear voice as opposed to touching? Think this would still be too "creepy" ?

[NikFromNYC]

It's all in your timing and body language and using comfort building touch as your opener. Just use the back of your fingers not the creepy grabby front to warmly contact the back of her shoulder for a slightly extended moment. Then do NOT say anything for yet another moment after she has 90% of the time calmly turned to check out what's up as if perhaps she dropped something. Giving her a moment to gather her wits with you having good relaxed friendly body language prepares her to enter listening mode and avoid an overly big adrenaline rush. Then just chat her up however you are best at. Touching her Platonically but warmly actually has a calming effect (just pretend you got the wrong person the <10% of times she grimaces at you because you really did get the wrong type of person with PTSD issues).

Your question alone is from an experienced perspective very blue pill. On average women outside of bars love to chat with a calmly confident guy in public. It's what they live for! Opening her from behind takes some balls but that's of great advantage to you for doing it. In Badboy's workshops he even teaches guys to impress gals much more by just shoulder spinning them to face you, and it almost never fails. Why? Because you are treating her as comfortably as if you already knew her so the friend program kicks in.

If you are too timid just develop your command voice and again utilize extended delay moments before you speak again after she turns to address a loud "Heh" and use more delays between your first few words "You.....look...uh... like a gal I'd like to meet." Those delays are merely everyday socially savvy and respectful to moderate the shock factor. Without giving her time to size you up you are stuck in stranger danger mode and she will find it hard to even process what you are saying.

Being actually authentic in what you do say will release you from having "game" in your head too which can really help your vibe in ways the local NYC lair members could barely seem to comprehend which is why I abandoned wingmen long ago. And certainly don't write utterly creepy field reports since they make you and objectively creepy even slimy human being. Realize that the point of "seduction college" is to graduate.

[Sensei Creation]

Half of my approaches are from the back . A lot of times when I'm unsure on a woman's face I like to let her pass me to see if her ass tips the balance back in her favor .

You'd be surprised , more often than not they aren't startled at all . Especially if your in a "safe environment" such as a mall or book store .

When they are , my body language and voice intonations rarely project insecurity and my opener is a compliment . This quickly calms them down and I can resume gaming .

The worst that's happened is she puts some distance between us , and ejects . But that's a blowout . Approaching from the front would not have changed this .