[Checkmat]

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[TravelerKai]

Sadly the only way to deal with any funny guy is to be funny yourself. The crucial thing is to never sit up in the front. I am a funny guy but vs Mike Epps or Rickey Smiley I would be completely and utterly destroyed on the spot. Against guys of that caliber I would not even bother defending myself. I also would not go as a mixed interracial couple either. That's why I never sit up front and refuse to buy tickets close enough to get roasted. I once traded some tickets that were up front with some people that were further back.

Also comedy clubs are risky depending upon your relationship with a chick. I would not take women out to one if we were not STR-LTR-ish. You basically need to be banging the chick to avoid anything sticking to you like stink on shit. Certain comedians can kill the mood of the night as well by bringing up very uncomfortable shit, which means no pussy tonight for you. If you were a regular in that chick's pussy, nothing that guy said should typically ruin your chances to get the balls drained at the end of the night.

[kmhour]

I went on an early date before any sex to a comedy show years ago and had the same thought in the back of my mind. some comedians love to play with the crowd, others just see them as an audience who listens while they talk. and even if you've seen the headliner before - the opening acts are probably more likely to do that kind of crowd interaction than a pro with a polished routine.

honestly, in hindsight I think the only way to handle this is not to go to a small comedy show before you've slept with her. there is literally no chance that you are more witty than a man who earns money standing on stage making people laugh. the only way to win is not to play the game. what answers was this guy going to give the comedian? like not complying with the questions means he couldn't find a way of mocking the guy?

[Checkmat]

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[WestIndianArchie]

In that situation, the problem is whatever witty shit you can think of, he has the mic. Your shit is not gonna get heard, while he can keep digging on you.

Rush the stage and put your hands on em.

"Who's funny now mf'ers"

Most of these entertainers, actors/comedians/musicians think that regular people are pussies. It's part of their entitlement frame.

Fuck that. Even a pencil neck geek can put his Prius keys into the side of a guys neck.

The more typical one is a dude tries to step in on your macking at the club
1) he doesn't think you're a physical threat - remedy that shit, start lifting.
2) you can go physical, but that might fuck up your club experience
3) call dude out for his dirty macking, and test his gangsta verbally

"I see you peeping a player, you interested in me or her?"

"I used to dirty mack back when I didn't have the balls to step to a chick. What you gonna do, blow me out, and then step to her talking about my bad game, build a little commonality. What are you 13?"

"Is that all you got?"

Et cetera. But go for the jugular.

The other typical set up is the Mother Hen situation, where the hating ass friend comes out of nowhere with her play by play.

In the guy case, you step to the guy guns blazing.
In the girl case, you need more finesse. Going too hard on a bitch's friend can lose you the lay (and sometimes the relationship -as bitches will imagine themselves in that position)

Use your anti-shit-test technology, (ignore, agree and amplify, mishear...et cetera), and you've got to defang this chick and bring the target on your side.

WIA

[Ensam]

I would never take a girl to a comedy show. Period.

You're basically taking a chick into a situation where you are never going to be the top dog. A good comedian has hundreds if not thousands of hours of running crowds. Listen to Ari Shaiffir's podcast (http://www.arishaffir.com/category/podcast/). He talks about fucking chick's in the bathroom while their boyfriends sit in the crowd none the wiser. He even mentions how affectionate they are to their guys once they get back to their seats. In a milder case even if a guy just makes fun out of you in front of a crowd it's going to turn the chick off to you forever.

[GoldHawkStar]

The best way to handle it? One-up the comedian with any chance you get. Reverse the roles and make him look like a pansy. He'd back the fuck off and move on to the next victim asap.

But what would I do? After all I'm not that great with on-the-spot stuff like that. I'd just smile and laugh along. Don't stutter, be confident. Make him know that you're a confident person who's fine with being the ass of the joke. He wouldn't waste any time moving on since you're not giving him the reaction he wants, like the unfortunate guy you talked about. Guys like him are gold to comedians with the 'audience interaction' style.

[TravelerKai]

(01-17-2015 05:36 PM)Checkmat Wrote:  

(01-17-2015 05:25 PM)TravelerKai Wrote:  

Sadly the only way to deal with any funny guy is to be funny yourself. The crucial thing is to never sit up in the front. I am a funny guy but vs Mike Epps or Rickey Smiley I would be completely and utterly destroyed on the spot. Against guys of that caliber I would not even bother defending myself. I also would not go as a mixed interracial couple either. That's why I never sit up front and refuse to buy tickets close enough to get roasted. I once traded some tickets that were up front with some people that were further back.

Also comedy clubs are risky depending upon your relationship with a chick. I would not take women out to one if we were not STR-LTR-ish. You basically need to be banging the chick to avoid anything sticking to you like stink on shit. Certain comedians can kill the mood of the night as well by bringing up very uncomfortable shit, which means no pussy tonight for you. If you were a regular in that chick's pussy, nothing that guy said should typically ruin your chances to get the balls drained at the end of the night.

Great point. Avoid being caught in the crosshairs to begin with.

You're right too about bringing up uncomfortable things. He asked the couple, "So you haven't fucked yet...Are you (the girl) playing by the 3-date rule?"

Mentally I was like fuck dude...I'm trying to bang this girl on the 2nd date, don't be bringing up 3-date rules!

(01-17-2015 05:35 PM)kmhour Wrote:  

what answers was this guy going to give the comedian? like not complying with the questions means he couldn't find a way of mocking the guy?

He was answering everything directly. The comedian was in total control of the frame, and the beta guy was submissively answering everything and kowtowing to his social master. It was pathetic.

I was thinking of not complying too and actually calling the comedian out on being a dick. "Dude, we're here to have fun. We paid to see you perform, not get interrogated. Pick on somebody else. This isn't cool. I'm not your play thing. Fuck off."

If you had said that out loud you would have been roasted 10 ways to Sunday. I bet DeliciousTacos probably would stand his ground well against most comedians.

Now that I think about it. The best rebuff of a comedian I ever saw was this rich handsome man was up front with a serious 10 smokeshow. The comedian was trying to clown him and said he would come take his bitch. Dude leaned back and yelled back, come get her if you can. She leaned more into him. Then the comedian redirected into a joke about his goatee instead and his leather jacket. You cannot win against these guys. They have the mic, they are like the lawyers in a courthouse, and if they hit a dead end, they switch gears and find something else to clown you on.

The show hosts tend to be light comedians and sometimes are easy enough to fight off. I have seen plenty getting booed for being too lame at roasting people in the front. They just change the subject to announce the next comedian coming to the stage. Consequently the approaching comedian usually roasts them on the spot for stinking up the joint. I once saw a former BET Comicview guy do that once then he finished off the couple that host could not roast. Nasty. lol

[TravelerKai]

(01-17-2015 05:55 PM)Goldhawkstar Wrote:  

The best way to handle it? One-up the comedian with any chance you get. Reverse the roles and make him look like a pansy. He'd back the fuck off and move on to the next victim asap.

But what would I do? After all I'm not that great with on-the-spot stuff like that. I'd just smile and laugh along. Don't stutter, be confident. Make him know that you're a confident person who's fine with being the ass of the joke. He wouldn't waste any time moving on since you're not giving him the reaction he wants, like the unfortunate guy you talked about. Guys like him are gold to comedians with the 'audience interaction' style.

Very funny people can see the bitch in anyone. It's like they see blood. They tend to pick on that person until that person probably wants to crawl under a chair. Body language is usually the dead giveaway. You are right about showing confidence and resolve.

[Tuthmosis]

You guys are getting worked up over nothing. Stick to your game principles and you're fine.

In that situation--first date, haven't banged the girl, comedian is on you--it's a classic agree and amplify:

Comedian: "So are you guys on a date? Have you banged yet?"
Tuthmosis: "We're Mormons. We've been married for 15 years and have 10 kids."
Comedian: "You're Mormons? [they often repeat part of what you say to the audience when they're doing "crowd work"] You don't look like Mormons."
Tuthmosis: "Your mom looks like a Mormon."

Be silly, do everything with a smile, and get your girl--and the people around you--laughing and you'll get all the points you need. You don't need a microphone or to worry about the comedian banging your girl.

[TravelerKai]

(01-17-2015 05:52 PM)WestIndianArchie Wrote:  

In that situation, the problem is whatever witty shit you can think of, he has the mic. Your shit is not gonna get heard, while he can keep digging on you.

Rush the stage and put your hands on em.

"Who's funny now mf'ers"

Most of these entertainers, actors/comedians/musicians think that regular people are pussies. It's part of their entitlement frame.

Fuck that. Even a pencil neck geek can put his Prius keys into the side of a guys neck.

The more typical one is a dude tries to step in on your macking at the club
1) he doesn't think you're a physical threat - remedy that shit, start lifting.
2) you can go physical, but that might fuck up your club experience
3) call dude out for his dirty macking, and test his gangsta verbally

"I see you peeping a player, you interested in me or her?"

"I used to dirty mack back when I didn't have the balls to step to a chick. What you gonna do, blow me out, and then step to her talking about my bad game, build a little commonality. What are you 13?"

"Is that all you got?"

Et cetera. But go for the jugular.

The other typical set up is the Mother Hen situation, where the hating ass friend comes out of nowhere with her play by play.

In the guy case, you step to the guy guns blazing.
In the girl case, you need more finesse. Going too hard on a bitch's friend can lose you the lay (and sometimes the relationship -as bitches will imagine themselves in that position)

Use your anti-shit-test technology, (ignore, agree and amplify, mishear...et cetera), and you've got to defang this chick and bring the target on your side.

WIA

This is raw and pure gold. Even if you get kicked out, that shit would make for an excellent story on the next chick you mack.

You are spot on in dealing with cockblocking wingwomen. Clown them too hard or too strong of a diss, you will lose the lay and then some. It's gotta be very white glove slap wise. Turning goofy style jokes usually help me diss and redirect their rage (with black women). Other races, I usually dig harder into them, like a notch or two down from a Tosh diss.

[TravelerKai]

(01-17-2015 06:06 PM)Tuthmosis Wrote:  

You guys are getting worked up over nothing. Stick to your game principles and you're fine.

In that situation--first date, haven't banged the girl, comedian is on you--it's a classic agree and amplify:

Comedian: "So are you guys on a date? Have you banged yet?"
Tuthmosis: "We're Mormons. We've been married for 15 years and have 10 kids."
Comedian: "You're Mormons? [they often repeat part of what you say to the audience when they're doing "crowd work"] You don't look like Mormons."
Tuthmosis: "You're mom looks like a Mormon."

Be silly, do everything with a smile, and get your girl--and the people around you--laughing and you'll get all the points you need. You don't need a microphone or to worry about the comedian banging your girl.

You cannot honestly expect your average cat to be able to pull off a reply like that, but I like that kind of reply. Would get you destroyed on a higher level guy though. Much like how Katt Williams annihilated that Mexican guy in one of his shows, which went viral. He broke off his whole routine just to keep killing that guy over and over.

Ah I found it incase anyone hasn't seen this dumpster fire yet.

[MdWanderer]

(01-17-2015 06:20 PM)TravelerKai Wrote:  

Who wrote Katt's routine that night, Rush Limbaugh?

[monster]

The best thing you can possibly do is take it in good humor, just like how you handle shit tests.

Hell, it basically is a shit test.

[GoldHawkStar]

(01-17-2015 06:05 PM)TravelerKai Wrote:  

(01-17-2015 05:55 PM)Goldhawkstar Wrote:  

The best way to handle it? One-up the comedian with any chance you get. Reverse the roles and make him look like a pansy. He'd back the fuck off and move on to the next victim asap.

But what would I do? After all I'm not that great with on-the-spot stuff like that. I'd just smile and laugh along. Don't stutter, be confident. Make him know that you're a confident person who's fine with being the ass of the joke. He wouldn't waste any time moving on since you're not giving him the reaction he wants, like the unfortunate guy you talked about. Guys like him are gold to comedians with the 'audience interaction' style.

Very funny people can see the bitch in anyone. It's like they see blood. They tend to pick on that person until that person probably wants to crawl under a chair. Body language is usually the dead giveaway. You are right about showing confidence and resolve.

Exactly. Go back to the basic rules of the playground in elementary school. If a bully picks on you, what do you do? Be assertive and tell him to go away? No, then he knows he's succeeding at bothering you. Stutter, stand hunched, and look around nervously? You're officially his bitch. Stand stiff and laugh along with him, let him know that you have a good sense of humor? You're no longer a victim. Hell, he may enjoy your company after that.

[TravelerKai]

(01-17-2015 06:34 PM)MdWanderer Wrote:  

[quote='TravelerKai' pid='934325' dateline='1421536856']


Who wrote Katt's routine that night, Rush Limbaugh?

Katt Williams is a complicated guy, like any of the other elite comedians. He is very well known for his patriotism. At least I thought he was until that tirade stunned half of America.

He also has some surprisingly red pill beliefs like Eddie Griffin does, which sometimes catches people off guard.

[Tuthmosis]

(01-17-2015 06:20 PM)TravelerKai Wrote:  

You cannot honestly expect your average cat to be able to pull off a reply like that, but I like that kind of reply. Would get you destroyed on a higher level guy though. Much like how Katt Williams annihilated that Mexican guy in one of his shows, which went viral. He broke off his whole routine just to keep killing that guy over and over.

Unless the guy on stage is a Patrice O'Neal (RIP) or another A-lister, I'm not getting roasted by no regular comedian. I thrive in that setting, and can go (and have gone) toe-to-toe with some funny-ass motherfuckers throughout my life who are way better than the guys you run into at your regular night at the local comedy club. What gets me bitches isn't my model looks, it's my silver tongue, so I'm quick on my feet and have an endless supply of material. I love audiences. Truth be told, I'm a stand-up comedian's worst nightmare of an audience member. I have a loud voice, I'm sharp-witted, and I'm probably funnier than most of the guys going on stage that night. This isn't my opinion. This is the consensus from people I've met over the years.

That said, I don't need to "win" that contest. I'm there to enjoy the show and show my girl a good time. I want to let the comedian be funny while not getting punked, while also not trying too hard to look hard in front of my girl. I might even set him up for the joke. Taking that shit too seriously is a sure way to look like an insecure, unfunny dumb-ass in her eyes. He's working, I'm watching.

Odds are, I would have prepped my girl about being picked from the audience anyway (something I've done before). "If that dude picks us, I'm going to give him material to be funny. Don't be offended if I tell him you're a prostitute I picked off the street."

[kmhour]

(01-17-2015 06:00 PM)TravelerKai Wrote:  

(01-17-2015 05:36 PM)Checkmat Wrote:  

(01-17-2015 05:35 PM)kmhour Wrote:  

what answers was this guy going to give the comedian? like not complying with the questions means he couldn't find a way of mocking the guy?

He was answering everything directly. The comedian was in total control of the frame, and the beta guy was submissively answering everything and kowtowing to his social master. It was pathetic.

I was thinking of not complying too and actually calling the comedian out on being a dick. "Dude, we're here to have fun. We paid to see you perform, not get interrogated. Pick on somebody else. This isn't cool. I'm not your play thing. Fuck off."

If you had said that out loud you would have been roasted 10 ways to Sunday. I bet DeliciousTacos probably would stand his ground well against most comedians.

Exactly. I've seen it happen live when someone complains along those lines or tries to heckle. You think nobody has ever told the comedian "we paid to see a show" or "this is a comedy show, tell me a joke" or some comment of that ilk? And that he doesn't have a response (shit, multiple) off the cuff? Shit, that's teeing one up.

Like I said, you aren't going to beat a guy who does this for a living. Especially when he has the mic.

WIA hit on an interesting aspect - I've seen Jim Jefferies live and know for a fact he was attacked on stage (by some lunatic, not by someone he'd mocked). Didn't stop him from making a 9/11 joke that didn't go over too well with some hecklers. But still, something to keep in mind.

I do like Tuthmosis' response, hadn't even thought of that, but it's a high risk approach. A good comedian will have a rejoinder.

And some other posters are alluding to the other defense - I feel bad for the guy in Checkmat's story, but if you look like a beta with a girl well out of your league, you're going to be more of a target. So... don't look like that guy.

[MY DETROIT PLAYAS]

An interesting aside - The Eddie Griffin's/Kat Williams/Corey Holcomb's of the world who feature red pill shit in their routines have dedicated female followings

Is it because women don't mind hearing the real shit if the messenger has the balls enough and can deliver in a humorous way, or is it because deep down they really know the how the order of things should be?

IMO opinion a little of both

[MY DETROIT PLAYAS]

To answer OP's question, the best way is to remain chill, whether or not you decide to amplify or exaggerate demands how witty you can get...of course it's been stated that your most cleverest shit won't have the same effect without the mic anyway.

Just avoid any goofy gear - bright ass colors, or obvious clothing missteps. That includes your chick too

I really enjoy comedy shows and have sat in the front, back and side with different girls all from different backgrounds only one interracial joke made but we both laughed it off, but then too I made sure I was with a proper chick and dressed clean as the board of health

[Tuthmosis]

Hypothetical: Katt Williams picks on me and is roasting me mercilessly like this dude in the video above. This is what I do:

First of all, I whisper a few light jokes to my girl to lock her down.

Tuthmosis: Do you think he's secretly in love with me? I've read that he goes both ways.
Tuthmosis: This dude is loud-as-fuck. Do you think it's rude to ask him to turn down the speakers a little bit?

He'll no-doubt start punking me about whispering into her ear. That's my bait. I then motion to him to let me get a microphone. Had I just asked for one straight up, he wouldn't have gone for it. Doing the whispering gets him intrigued. He asks the stage hands for a mic and hands it to me.

Katt Williams: What do you have to say so urgently, n*gga?
Tuthmosis: I don't have anything to say. I was just telling my girl that you're one loud-ass dude. We're wondering if you scream louder than the bitches you be fuckin'.
[audience is like "aw snap" and laughs]
Katt: That's your girl? I thought that was your pet. Didn't you see the "no dogs allowed" sign on the door? [or some other diss about my appearance]
[audience busts out again]
Tuth: [to my girl in the audience] See what I mean? This dude is funny as shit. [back to Katt] I'm a big fan of your work. But she doesn't like that you're so oily that George Bush was thinking of invading your weave.
[more snaps from the audience]

I'd just keep snapping on him till he gets tired of it or I get booed off stage. I would probably prematurely cut off the conversation and be like, "Joking aside, you're one funny-ass dude Katt. Let's put it together for a Pimp Named Slickback!" and dap him on the way out.

[Sketness]

yea man if you're not quick witted id say away from comedy clubs. Its like that scene from the nutty professor when fat eddie murphy takes his date to the comedy club and the dave chapplle the comidiean goes in on him. if your not ready to slam a n*gga in a piano at then end then don't go.

Me personally i am quick witted so using Tuthmosis's example id go in on the dude

Kat: (shot at me)

Me: please... what are you al sharpton? yall got the same perm. Yall hair just haining on to your forhead like mufassa from the lion ling

[Kamikaze]

Word of caution: unless at least ten people have previously told you that you could be a comedian, do not go in on a comedian.

[Vaun]

true story; in a somewhat famous comedy club here, my date and I were ushered to the front row. I tried to say no but she was into it and I just went with it, with a dumb ass big grin. Low and behold, her and I were a part of each set and had a great time. Then mister smart ass Tracy Morgan gets up there as the last act, and proceeds to serenade her and I with a half retard version of Jungle Fever for obvious reasons of why we were put in the front. I took her home after that and boned her all night. Probably one of my favorite dates ever. Good comedians are not mean spirited, in fact, most are not at all, unless you are in a dump somewhere with an amateur. Most real comedians are not there to bang your girl and annihilate you, they want everyone to have a good time. Just go with it if you are in the front, dont be a wuss, play it off well.

[Menace]

People do not rise to the occasion. If you have never verbally jousted with a comedian, or something similar, you will not magically become Groucho Marx. You will get burned. Tuthmosis sounds like he may be an exception.

I have taken girls to a comedy club before because I love live stand up comedy. But. 1) I have banged her many many times previously. 2) I sit well away from the stage. You have to be an idiot to not know there is a significant chance you will get noticed, especially if the girl is attractive (and why would you bring an ugly girl anywhere?)

I'm with TravelerKai.