[D. Goodnuts]

I've recently been exploring the topic of happiness.
I can clearly recall my years as a pre-teen living in SoCal as the the happiest times of my life. It seemed that I was generally happy as a kid. As an adult, I've learned that happiness is defined my moments. Having kids, getting married, vacations, getting promotions, etc.

These moments add up but don't seem to fully equal a state of overall happiness. Is it possible to return to those "happy days" of our youth?

[Moma]

(04-25-2011 09:26 AM)D. Goodnuts Wrote:  

I've recently been exploring the topic of happiness.
I can clearly recall my years as a pre-teen living in SoCal as the the happiest times of my life. It seemed that I was generally happy as a kid. As an adult, I've learned that happiness is defined my moments. Having kids, getting married, vacations, getting promotions, etc.

These moments add up but don't seem to fully equal a state of overall happiness. Is it possible to return to those "happy days" of our youth?

Yes, it is possible to return.

[Chad Daring]

I'm 23 and basically everything before this was absolute shite. I'm happier then I've ever been, and I've got no real "moments" per se to thank for that. I think its more in how you look at life then what actually happens

[gringoed]

I realized recently two things I started doing a few years ago that really over time have made me significantly happier. I'm posting about it because they are things that you've probably never heard before. Country music and marijuana. Seriously!!!

Of course being healthy, having good friends/family, getting great women, having an exciting life and future, etc are very important as well but you've probably heard this before many times.

Country music and marijuana.

[manilaguy]

Happiness is freedom.

nuff said.

[Duke Castile]

(04-26-2011 03:23 PM)gringoed Wrote:  

I realized recently two things I started doing a few years ago that really over time have made me significantly happier. I'm posting about it because they are things that you've probably never heard before. Country music and marijuana. Seriously!!!

Of course being healthy, having good friends/family, getting great women, having an exciting life and future, etc are very important as well but you've probably heard this before many times.

Country music and marijuana.

I like country music from the 80s but today's stuff I can't get into. When I smoke I just get paranoid and can't enjoy the high.....I ENVY you!

Maybe I'll try blow and rap.....

[Gmac]

I'm pretty happy right now. Good job, rotation of women, no real problems. Had some hard times earlier in my life, I think I'm on top right now.

[kerouac]

(04-26-2011 05:15 PM)Fisto Wrote:  

(04-26-2011 03:23 PM)gringoed Wrote:  

Country music and marijuana.

I like country music from the 80s but today's stuff I can't get into. When I smoke I just get paranoid and can't enjoy the high.....I ENVY you!

Maybe I'll try blow and rap.....

I used to get pretty paranoid from ganja as well, but then one time I just smoked a little and made a conscious effort (or as conscious as I could be at the time) to enjoy it and think positive thoughts. Since that day smoking has been a lot more pleasurable for me.

[Chad Daring]

(04-26-2011 03:23 PM)gringoed Wrote:  

I realized recently two things I started doing a few years ago that really over time have made me significantly happier. I'm posting about it because they are things that you've probably never heard before. Country music and marijuana. Seriously!!!

Of course being healthy, having good friends/family, getting great women, having an exciting life and future, etc are very important as well but you've probably heard this before many times.

Country music and marijuana.

Im gonna be financially tight really soon, worried this might impact my mood, I'll keep this in mind

[Samseau]

(04-26-2011 04:39 PM)manilaguy Wrote:  

Happiness is freedom.

and to be free, certain necessities must be met:

- stable income (not much, just enough)
- not caring of others opinions of you
- a government that respects your liberties


notice women are absent. still, I like girls because of the high they bring. but some of the happiest moments of my life were some of the driest of times. often women limit freedoms and make you unhappy.

now, look at the list above and compare it to what a woman might need... aren't you glad to be a man!?

[Kaizen]

I thought I was the only one with pot-paranoia. that stuff is like acid for me so i stay away.

Not sure trying to increase the number of pleasurable 'moments' will equal happiness. Key is learning to be content doing the day to day mundane shit we all do.

[Screwston]

Lots of people get paranoid when smoking. I smoke a blunt or 2 a day, learned to control that paranoia when I first started.


I'm some what happy right now but I can't wait to go back to school and graduate. Ill be waking up every morning with a smile after that.

[Khaleth]

(04-26-2011 03:23 PM)gringoed Wrote:  

I realized recently two things I started doing a few years ago that really over time have made me significantly happier. I'm posting about it because they are things that you've probably never heard before. Country music and marijuana. Seriously!!!

Of course being healthy, having good friends/family, getting great women, having an exciting life and future, etc are very important as well but you've probably heard this before many times.

Country music and marijuana.

http://www.jstor.org/pss/2579974
I'd think twice about listening to Country Music... Hahaha Just sayin'

I recently read a book called Happier: Learn the Secrets to Daily Joy and Lasting Fulfillment by Tal Ben-Shahar. He teaches the most popular course at Harvard based on positive psychology. Its a pretty interesting read and the author has a really nice approach to writing. It basically breaks down the different approaches people use to try to achieve happiness and how you should make positive decisions in your life. You should check it out. Its pretty short too so you could probably just be one of those guys at Chapters that sits and reads the whole book if you wanna save some coin haha

[Moma]

Why continue to smoke if it gives paranoia? What are the benefits? My one experience with smoking was in 'Dam, took a few cakes and a few lollies, was absolutely spun the ENTIRE weekend so I know FIRSTHAND about the paranoia.

I constantly thought someone was trying to stick their hands in my pockets and steal my Euros. I kept twitching and turning around to confront the imaginary teen Euro crooks.
Given that 'dam is swarming with pickpockets, that's not a bad paranoia as it goes...

[gringoed]

Interesting link about country music and suicide, although it seems to have been debunked:

http://www.eric.ed.gov:80/ERICWebPortal/...o=EJ531954


It seems counterintuitive to me to say that about country, especially when compared to rock/alternative/punk which deals so heavily with angst, anger, depression, etc.

Here are some selections from just one country artist, Zac Brown:

1. About overcoming approach anxiety to talk to a girl
"Wise man next to me did say
bout the one that got away
son i missed my chance
Don’t you let regret take place
of the dreams you have to chase
ask her to dance…. go on son
you might fall down on your face
roll the dice and have some faith"

2. About being valuing what really matters
"It's funny how it's the little things in life
That mean the most
Not where you live or what you drive
Or the price tag on your clothes
There's no dollar sign on a peace of mind
This I've come to know

So if you agree, have a drink with me
Raise your glasses for a toast"

3. About being happy
"I got my toes in the water, ass in the sand
Not a worry in the world, a cold beer in my hand
Life is good today, life is good today"

How can this shit not make you happy? Anyways, I'm not speaking for everybody, just myself.


As for the weed, I was paranoid at first too but it was so worth it. You'll never appreciate music (for example) as much as when you're high. Good music feels amazing.

[babelfish669]

I think something is wrong if your happiness is defined by moments.

For me the happiest parts are being in a calm balanced situation as new things I enjoy unfold. I've had my share of sustained unhappy periods and I know when to correct things when they are headed in the wrong direction.

I can not relate to most people's situations as I have never held a full time job in my life, and am pretty much jet set at this point. Which, by the way, in itself does not make you happy.

[Moma]

(04-27-2011 02:13 PM)babelfish669 Wrote:  

I think something is wrong if your happiness is defined by moments.

For me the happiest parts are being in a calm balanced situation as new things I enjoy unfold. I've had my share of sustained unhappy periods and I know when to correct things when they are headed in the wrong direction.

I can not relate to most people's situations as I have never held a full time job in my life, and am pretty much jet set at this point. Which, by the way, in itself does not make you happy.

Happiness is a series of moments tied together. Life, time, are all a series of moments to which we ascribe meanings to. Some people are able to take joy from very vivid and joyful moments and spread that joy over more mundane moments and others experience a longer series of moments which sustain their feelings of happiness.

Again, we must understand the true sense of the word 'moment'.

[D. Goodnuts]

Moma - You clearly articulated what I was trying to express.
Khaleth - That guy is pretty good. Thanks for the heads up

Regarding the weed, I wish I had a solid connect here in the DMV...



Good stuff overall fellas.

[Screwston]

(04-27-2011 12:34 PM)Moma Wrote:  

Why continue to smoke if it gives paranoia? What are the benefits? My one experience with smoking was in 'Dam, took a few cakes and a few lollies, was absolutely spun the ENTIRE weekend so I know FIRSTHAND about the paranoia.

I constantly thought someone was trying to stick their hands in my pockets and steal my Euros. I kept twitching and turning around to confront the imaginary teen Euro crooks.
Given that 'dam is swarming with pickpockets, that's not a bad paranoia as it goes...

It doesn't make everyone act like that. The only people I've seen act like this are ones that hardly ever blow and don't know how to relax with it. I remember I used to get paranoid sometimes when I first started but once you get past that obstacle, you can appreciate puffing on a fat joint

[Docter]

Paranoia from weed is totally a mental thing. I've known a few guys who were hardcore into it, started flipping a shit, and then did some zen nonsense to get back into it. Or maybe it is your brain telling you to stop drugging it, who knows. If it's anything like shrooms its more likely the former explanation - set and setting.

As for happiness, I don't think it exists. The closest thing to happiness that I think really exists is the state of flow, where one is completely absorbed in a task. Some of my happiest moments were back when I was skim boarding, with nothing but the next wave, and the next drop on my mind.

Perhaps its the simplicity of such a state that makes it so amazing?

Anyway, point being if you are LOOKING or SEARCHING for happiness I think you're misguided. It is an internal state, not external.

PHILOSOPHY. BAM.

quick edit: There's some interesting posts on happiness over at Delusion Damage, this being the first http://delusiondamage.com/hidden-truths/...ome-from/. Interesting point of view.

[Timoteo]

(04-25-2011 09:26 AM)D. Goodnuts Wrote:  

I've recently been exploring the topic of happiness.
I can clearly recall my years as a pre-teen living in SoCal as the the happiest times of my life. It seemed that I was generally happy as a kid. As an adult, I've learned that happiness is defined my moments. Having kids, getting married, vacations, getting promotions, etc.

These moments add up but don't seem to fully equal a state of overall happiness. Is it possible to return to those "happy days" of our youth?

I don't really know what happy means, or what happy is. When someone asks me if I'm happy, the best response I can come up with is, "I'm cool right now." As you get older, and more things weigh on you, that happiness that you define by "carefree youth" is gone FOREVER. Yes...there are moments here and there. In between those moments, it's just...life. Sometimes drudgery, sometimes just routine.

I look back at some of the great times I've spent with my boys (our forays to Vegas, or Miami, or LA, or years ago in Rio) and think THIS IS WHAT IT'S ALL ABOUT. It can be hard as adults because our lives take us in different directions, and it can be hard to take time away from demands and responsibilities. But for at least a couple of weeks a year, you and your best friends need to try to convene somewhere and DO YOUR THING. Just unwind and not worry about anything other than enjoying your best friends, blow off steam, and leave those things that weigh on you behind. Just a couple of weeks of pure joy. The ability to do this makes you better at whatever it is you do.

[Beyond Borders]

(04-26-2011 06:17 PM)Chad Daring Wrote:  

(04-26-2011 03:23 PM)gringoed Wrote:  

I realized recently two things I started doing a few years ago that really over time have made me significantly happier. I'm posting about it because they are things that you've probably never heard before. Country music and marijuana. Seriously!!!

Of course being healthy, having good friends/family, getting great women, having an exciting life and future, etc are very important as well but you've probably heard this before many times.

Country music and marijuana.

Im gonna be financially tight really soon, worried this might impact my mood, I'll keep this in mind

After living overseas for this long, that actually sounds awesome right now. lol

[Timoteo]

(04-26-2011 04:39 PM)manilaguy Wrote:  

Happiness is freedom.

nuff said.

BINGO. That's the thing that would make me happiest. To be able to go where I want, when I want, and have nothing to hold me back. To be able to make a living from anywhere, as long as I have a computer and a phone. That would be the ultimate for me. To be like Jules in "Pulp Fiction," except I don't want to be a bum...HA HA!

[speakeasy]

Xenocrates has some very provocative thoughts on the nature of happiness over at his blog. It's in three parts, here is the first one: http://xenlogic.blogspot.com/2011/06/tru...-of-3.html

Happiness to me is rarely something I experience in the moment. It's almost always a sentimental feeling when I reflect back. I may experience fun in the moment or even contentment, but it's usually only in hindsight that I realize truely how happy or unhappy I was at any particular point. When you're in the moment, your perception can be skewed. You might be using drugs or alcohol and having a blast in the moment but years down the line you realize you weren't really happy at the time.