[Hardy Daytona]

I'm making myself head out with some routine now - most Friday nights to a club about 15 minutes away from my place.

It's taking time, but I'm gradually learning that it's impossible to have a roadmap for entire conversations.
That being said, I've been developing retorts for certain questions/shit-tests e.g. "Where are you from?" "Why do you ask? Are you planning on coming back with me later? [wink]"

For most of the available clubs, it's difficult to engage inside as the music's loud and hard to start a conversation. Damn near have to shout everything. Not conducive.

So it's easiest to do outside. And all it takes is asking if they have a light.
But here's where 1 of my problems emerge.
They show interest (it's not difficult as I dress with arguably some of the best style in the club) then the conversation proceeds with a few flirts and all the rest.
But then they.....float away. It's difficult to describe, but it's like they kind of meander back inside or to another group.

I know that I can't chase and I can't give any fucks, so what do I do? Shrug my shoulders and head back in?

One more question.
When I'm dancing, I sometimes find there's women orbiting me.
You know the ones - groups of 3-7 a couple of feet away and some of them glance at me before talking at each other.
Other times they'll circle dance and bring me into the fold.

It's obvious that they're fishing for attention, so what's the best way to respond?
I don't know what would be the best way as it's nothing that couldn't happen to any other guy who's dancing.

[Moto]

I'd suggest you mini-bounce before they float away. Lead them to the dance floor yourself. If it's near closing time, bounce them to a late-night eating place to get some food.

Night game, for me, has not depended much on what I said. When I pulled, whether same night or at a later date, it had more to do with my confidence and quick escalation and setting the tone right away.

He who hesitates, masturbates.

When you see these girls orbiting you and/or checking you out, go open them immediately. It can be pure caveman if you don't have the words or it's too loud. If they see you checking them out in return and not doing anything, it comes across as being scared or lacking confidence.

[tylerdurden1993]

When you approach a girl in a club (by actually talking to them) and things are going well, either bounce her to the dancefloor (to get physical) or bounce her to the smoking area to talk.

When your on the dancefloor you just have to go for it (caveman) style and get physical fast, if that goes well bounce her to another part of the club then talk to her for a bit then suggest you leave the club, if she doesn't want to leave with you just bounce her back to the dancefloor and get physical again. Rinse and repeat.

If you want to pull on a dancefloor in a club however make sure your reasonably drunk (i've found it helps for me personally) but not too drunk and can take a rejection.

[XXL]

(10-05-2014 11:56 AM)Hardy Daytona Wrote:  

But here's where 1 of my problems emerge.
They show interest (it's not difficult as I dress with arguably some of the best style in the club) then the conversation proceeds with a few flirts and all the rest.
But then they.....float away. It's difficult to describe, but it's like they kind of meander back inside or to another group.

I know that I can't chase and I can't give any fucks, so what do I do? Shrug my shoulders and head back in?

It's normal. You shouldn't expect girls to stay with you all night. They want to experience everything what's possible there. It has little to do with you and your game.

When you see they're about to leave just say "hey, I know you have to go now, it's fine, girls have to dance right? cool, I'll find you later, just don't go so crazy you'll sweat" ; ]

Then later on find her and game on. As long as you don't do anything stupid you can reapproach endlessly. Don't worry it's not needy

(10-05-2014 11:56 AM)Hardy Daytona Wrote:  

When I'm dancing, I sometimes find there's women orbiting me.
You know the ones - groups of 3-7 a couple of feet away and some of them glance at me before talking at each other.
Other times they'll circle dance and bring me into the fold.

It's obvious that they're fishing for attention, so what's the best way to respond?
I don't know what would be the best way as it's nothing that couldn't happen to any other guy who's dancing.

What do mean by how to "respond"?

When you catch them looking at you just bring them ALL in to dance with you. Show with your hand to come over or reach out your hand again and again to some of them and pull them in to you. It's fun.

[Sebastian]

Club game is totally different than Bar game. It's like you are running a concession stand at a festival.
If you don't grab customers attention in 3 secs, they will keep walking.

Think about Maxim magazine. Flashy cover (hot girls), intriguing topic (how to give her triple orgasm) and it's filled with funny things that's just worthless. but it grabs your attention.

That's how you supposed to be. I think it's fine asking about her background at a bar to steer your conversation to common grounds but it
can get them bored real fast if you ask 'you go to school', 'where are you from' etc at a club.

Figure out who you are first. Are you a club guy or bar type of person?
Club guys are the same as club girls. I don't remember carrying any type of conversation with those guys.
('full of guys here, do you know any better place?' that's the only thing I can talk with them)

[WestIndianArchie]

(10-05-2014 11:56 AM)Hardy Daytona Wrote:  

They show interest (it's not difficult as I dress with arguably some of the best style in the club) then the conversation proceeds with a few flirts and all the rest.
But then they.....float away. It's difficult to describe, but it's like they kind of meander back inside or to another group.

I know that I can't chase and I can't give any fucks, so what do I do? Shrug my shoulders and head back in?

First of all, CONGRATULATIONS on being able to mini-bounce.

Second, you haven't said much about
- what you say
- what she says
- whether or not you've tried to initiate physical contact
- reactions to words and touch

Tangentially, it might interesting to know if you're providing the cigarettes. I don't smoke, but I wouldn't be surprised if she's using you to feed her nicotine addiction.

What to do?
- getting her to come outside is great in terms of leading and compliance
- even if she's outside, she's not "open"
- open means that she wants to hear you talk, and then she wants to talk to you

As a newb, knowing what to say is of paramount importance. For whatever reason, Vets tend not to care so much. But trying to put myself in your Nike's,

*some* ideas on what to spark the convo

- canned story of whatever interesting thing happened to you today
- improvised story made up on the spot about the club, present environment
- cold reads on the chick - a cold read almost always invites her to respond...

^anything like that, you transition into the flirting

Then

- get the logistics (who she is, how she got there, who she's with...anything that can stop her from going home with you to play Monopoly)

- plant the seed of what you can do after the club.

- get your hands on her. Hold her hand while you give her a light, snatch her cigarette, or get bold and move in for the kiss

After you get a chick in a spot where she can hear your rap, you flirt with her, break the barrier, figure out if she can fuck, figure out if she's DTF, and then you get her mind wrapped around that idea as best you can.

(10-05-2014 11:56 AM)Hardy Daytona Wrote:  

One more question.
When I'm dancing, I sometimes find there's women orbiting me.
You know the ones - groups of 3-7 a couple of feet away and some of them glance at me before talking at each other.
Other times they'll circle dance and bring me into the fold.

It's obvious that they're fishing for attention, so what's the best way to respond?
I don't know what would be the best way as it's nothing that couldn't happen to any other guy who's dancing.

If a chick is dancing near you
- come in from the side
- mimic her moves
- then change it up and get her to follow
- turn towards her
- dance together

If you're a good dancer, then you turn her into an object.

Twirl her around, make her look good.
Social proof -other girls want to look good to, you'll get more dances like that. Plus there's the "You two look good together" - which again is bullshit, because you're the one making her look good.

But good dancing has to lead back to the bar, wall, couch, lounge, or outside for a smoke.

Unless you're college aged and she is to, in which case dancefloor makeouts are fine.

WIA

[Hardy Daytona]

(10-05-2014 07:45 PM)WestIndianArchie Wrote:  

First of all, CONGRATULATIONS on being able to mini-bounce.

Second, you haven't said much about
- what you say
- what she says
- whether or not you've tried to initiate physical contact
- reactions to words and touch

Tangentially, it might interesting to know if you're providing the cigarettes. I don't smoke, but I wouldn't be surprised if she's using you to feed her nicotine addiction.

What to do?
- getting her to come outside is great in terms of leading and compliance
- even if she's outside, she's not "open"
- open means that she wants to hear you talk, and then she wants to talk to you

As a newb, knowing what to say is of paramount importance. For whatever reason, Vets tend not to care so much. But trying to put myself in your Nike's,

*some* ideas on what to spark the convo

- canned story of whatever interesting thing happened to you today
- improvised story made up on the spot about the club, present environment
- cold reads on the chick - a cold read almost always invites her to respond...

^anything like that, you transition into the flirting

Then

- get the logistics (who she is, how she got there, who she's with...anything that can stop her from going home with you to play Monopoly)

- plant the seed of what you can do after the club.

- get your hands on her. Hold her hand while you give her a light, snatch her cigarette, or get bold and move in for the kiss

After you get a chick in a spot where she can hear your rap, you flirt with her, break the barrier, figure out if she can fuck, figure out if she's DTF, and then you get her mind wrapped around that idea as best you can.

If a chick is dancing near you
- come in from the side
- mimic her moves
- then change it up and get her to follow
- turn towards her
- dance together

If you're a good dancer, then you turn her into an object.

Twirl her around, make her look good.
Social proof -other girls want to look good to, you'll get more dances like that. Plus there's the "You two look good together" - which again is bullshit, because you're the one making her look good.

But good dancing has to lead back to the bar, wall, couch, lounge, or outside for a smoke.

Unless you're college aged and she is to, in which case dancefloor makeouts are fine.

WIA

I would say thanks but it's not me. I pretty much stay rooted to the spot when I'm out smoking.
They get a little bit further away, then a little bit more and a little more and next thing I know I'm standing alone again without there having being a single line of dialogue about leaving.
I should incorporate the line about them having to leave if I spot it happening again.

What do I say? Not much.
I asked if they have a light, what brings them out and let things flow from there. I might make some observations about the club and then chit chat from there. It never really lasts long enough to go anywhere.

Who do they say? The usual.
I've gotten comments on how polished my shoes are (no Nike's for me) or on my pocket square. They ask the usual questions like what's my name, what do I do, where do I live etc. so I just hit them with a little fact and playful fiction.

Physical contact. For the most part no.
I still have a psychological barrier to physical escalation outside of the dance floor. I worry they'll recoil in horror and call security who'll believe them without question, eject me and have me blacklisted from every club in the area.

Reactions are pretty much what you'd expect - there's a little laughter, some head nodding. Maybe some surprise or intrigue.

I don't provide smokes. It's sometimes a good starting point as Embassy No. 1's are considered old geezer cigarettes and flows into some light ribbing.

Getting them to follow me outside is...difficult. Because of the pack mentality of their friends they rarely venture outside alone and prefer to bask in group male attention.
That reminds me of something I saw when I was last out - a skinny-jean wearing beta actually took a girl's hand on the dance floor and kissed it cordially. I almost felt ill.

College was some years ago for me. But it's amazing how some women never seem to grow out of the giggling schoolgirl routine when there's a high value male nearby.
Since they tend to assemble in large numbers that's a nut I'm not good enough to crack yet.

[Sebastian]

Physical contact. For the most part no.
I still have a psychological barrier to physical escalation outside of the dance floor. I worry they'll recoil in horror and call security who'll believe them without question, eject me and have me blacklisted from every club in the area.
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With that mind going through your head, I am pretty sure you act awkward when it comes to being close to girls.
I never thought about something like that in my life.

Basically you are thinking 'what if I creep them out'. then you will creep them about.

I think you need to work on to change your mindset first.