[Nomad77]

You guys need to specify if these are girls are in the US or outside of the US.

[horn]

Works in a caring industry. This could be a waitress.

Cooks. Says 'I want to make you breakfast' the night before or 'dinner' if you day-gamed her.

Does your dishes.

Gives you music/books to listen/read to.

Asks if she can pick something up on the way over.

Orders you a drink.

Doesn't blame you if she can't reach orgasm.

If I ask a girl out, I expect to pay for everything. That's just how it is. If she volunteers, great, but I don't expect it.

[Nomad77]

It's sad but in Miami I keep seeing that once a girl feels she has "got you" she will start treating you like crap and start being bitchy and demanding regardless of how nice and giving they were in the beginning. I meet a wide variety of girls and am constantly surprised by this even from girls that are in 5 - 7 range. You basically need to keep them on a tight leash and smack them down the moment they show any insolence. Otherwise, they will just start disrespecting you like you are some beta chump.

[Jack198]

(09-27-2014 09:15 PM)eradicator Wrote:  

(09-27-2014 09:07 PM)Nomad77 Wrote:  

So I have come to understand this is one of my main issues with American girls. So how do I filter for this? How can I detect if a girl has the potential to be a giver?

date more yoga women. go to yoga retreats, concerts, get involved. the quality of women i meet through yoga is much higher than your average american woman.

I'm a little surprised by this; in addition to being in their thirties and beyond, most yoga women seem to be the classic #SWPL kind of people and by definition very self-centered. But I guess there are exceptions.

[Nomad77]

I agree, I know a lot of yoga girls and they are just as messed up as regular girls. They just hide it behind all that free love and bohemian BS. The packaging is different but inside they are not much different once you really get to know them.

[Travesty]

I think looking at their family and how many real close girlfriends they have that aren't sluts are the two main things to look for.

Yoga, educated, not educated, sporty, bookish, none of that really matters as much to find a giver.

A girl that visit her grandma to help make dinner with her every Sunday while also having a strong father figure she adores and a mother she gets along with well is all great.

Just rare in America that's why we stoop for free love 30s yoga girls. It's what's left.

[Jack198]

Agree - social proof goes a long way. If her friends are sluts, well, birds of a feather and all....

[Travesty]

Not just all friends, any close friend is a slut, the friend will try to get new dick in her and turn her into a taker any chance she gets.

[Matt3B]

The last 3 girls I've "dated" (i.e more than just a one night stand) have been "givers".

The last one baked me cinnamon rolls. This was in Croatia.

The one before that cooked me meals and we made breakfast together every time she was over. This was in Spain.

The one before that used to come over and bring me lunch or make it for me. This was in London.

The one night stands and dates I go on, the girl always pays for at least one drink. Some say they'll buy it, some I have to say we're going 50/50.

Either way, I ALWAYS get texts from girls the next day or on the same night (if we haven't gone home with each other) thanking me for a nice time, and this happens with all nationalities here in London.

Maybe it's just an American girl thing, maybe it's a reflection of you guys. I don't know.

I need to get over to America sometime. I really want to see what the girls are like over there.

[jariel]

Let's not glamorize or romanticize waitresses.

Most waitresses, especially above college age, are just chicks with no other skills.

I rather have a girl who has some sort of cosmetology background.

[Travesty]

MattC, I am not sure you could get a clear indication of American girls if you have a British accent. Maybe in NYC it would have a bit less effect, but most girls would treat you a bit better solely for the accent.

[Jack198]

(09-30-2014 03:44 PM)MattC Wrote:  

I need to get over to America sometime. I really want to see what the girls are like over there.

I'll save you the trouble - they're fat, loud and narcissistic. Kind of like the average Brit girl, only with a different accent and slightly better teeth.

[Sonsowey]

My girl, one time she was over at my house. I had dishes in the sink. We were gonna go out to eat. She went to wash my dishes for no reason, we weren't gonna use them. I'm like, "No don't worry, let's just go eat". She's like "No, I want to help you".

She wakes up with me early in the morning to make me breakfast while I shower, even if she doesn't have to be up. She'll go back to sleep after I leave for work after having made me breakfast.

Cleans, does the wash...

Yea, definite "Giver"

[Jack198]

(09-30-2014 08:57 PM)Sonsowey Wrote:  

My girl, one time she was over at my house. I had dishes in the sink. We were gonna go out to eat. She went to wash my dishes for no reason, we weren't gonna use them. I'm like, "No don't worry, let's just go eat". She's like "No, I want to help you".

She wakes up with me early in the morning to make me breakfast while I shower, even if she doesn't have to be up. She'll go back to sleep after I leave for work after having made me breakfast.

Cleans, does the wash...

Yea, definite "Giver"

Asian?

[Sonsowey]

^ Latina

[Matt3B]

(09-30-2014 05:48 PM)Travesty444 Wrote:  

MattC, I am not sure you could get a clear indication of American girls if you have a British accent. Maybe in NYC it would have a bit less effect, but most girls would treat you a bit better solely for the accent.

Aye, that's the thing. I still don't think it'll save me from their general narcissism and bitchy attitudes, but I wouldn't be able to get the same "experience" as you guys get.

[Nomad77]

American girls are bad but Miami girls are worse! Girls in Miami are not only Takers, they are neurotic.

[TigerMandingo]

Try veterinarians. But only if she's foreign-born. My ex was one. She would cook meals, take care of me when I was sick, provide emotional support etc. It was a beautiful thing. Now, of course I'm extrapolating a bit here because I haven't dated any other vets besides her (although I've known others and they were similar in personality and disposition).

[Travesty]

^ Banged around with a 26yo veterenarian in training. Loved horses and drug dealer ex-bfs.

She said I would make an excellent cocaine dealer which I took to heart as one of the best compliments of my life.

BATSHIT crazy. Would let me have her ass and cum in her mouth etc... She said if I dated her she would cook, clean, and fuck me on command like it was her life's work.

That said still not worth it.

Foreign chick - you're god damn tootin'! American white girls are a psychological horror house many times.

[TigerMandingo]

^ yea I was just about to add the American girl vets are nutjobs. Their over-the-top obsession with animals borders on mental illness and it will translate into your relationship should you go that route.

[MtnMan]

currenty GF is a nurse, makes me dinner at least once a week, gives back rubs, buys me cool little gifts, painted some artwork for my house.

She is 30, super into yoga and hiking/paddleboarding/backcountry skiing etc.

Only been a 'couple' a short time, so she might just be putting on a good show to get me hooked. Time will tell.

[jariel]

(10-01-2014 01:59 PM)MtnMan Wrote:  

currenty GF is a nurse, makes me dinner at least once a week, gives back rubs, buys me cool little gifts, painted some artwork for my house.

She is 30, super into yoga and hiking/paddleboarding/backcountry skiing etc.

Only been a 'couple' a short time, so she might just be putting on a good show to get me hooked. Time will tell.

Nurses tend to be cray cray, good sex though.

Dinner once a week?

She couldn't be with my ass.

[WestIndianArchie]

So if your realize a girl is a giver, what then?

Do they hang your jersey from the rafters?
Out of the game?

Spin plates?
Stay aloof?
Induce some competition anxiety?
Brace for the inevitable?

WIA

[Manipulator]

Not sure what it is about vets but my experience with one was identical. A total freak behind closed doors. I am currently seeing her.

[trainwreck]

(09-29-2014 03:35 PM)AneroidOcean Wrote:  

1) Always caring how I was doing, their default was to always ask how I was doing and seeing what they could do to help me before sharing any of their frustrations/issues they might be going through.
2) Cares about her friends and family.
3) Works her schedule around mine, goes out of her way to spend time with me.
4) Always offer to pay for themselves at minimum.
5) Cook/bake for me and bring me leftovers of good meals to make sure I don't go hungry. Obviously I wouldn't go hungry without that food, but they want me to have quality food.
6) Bring me very thoughtful gifts. Usually minor, but very much appreciated and completely unsolicited.
7) Offer to run errands or bring something on their way over to me. When I work late, when I end up not being able to meet them, when I have other things take priority, they are always accommodating/understanding and offer to come to me just to say hi/visit quickly or to reschedule.
8) Always very happy/appreciative whenever I do something for them, however small.
9) Does volunteer work (I hadn't even thought about this until it was posted by youngblazer but it's actually a GREAT quality shared by all three of the last girls I dated).
10) Always help me clean up after a party/BBQ/get together. Usually helping clean/support during the events as well. Always ask if they can invite their friends, bring only quality people to my events that add to the group. Big in my world to not bring drama/low value people around.

All have been giving in bed, but then I don't like to fuck entitled girls who think I should do everything for them. These girls are absolutely overjoyed with how I fuck them and absolutely deserve every orgasm I give them and love giving me orgasms. Never complain once when they don't get an orgasm and I just fuck them quick to get mine from time to time.

Man reading this post I'm realizing how bad my old relationship was and how bad I used to be at screening girls.

I'm the complete opposite of you. My ex comes from an extremely wealthy family - i'm talking house in southern europe, house in scandinavia and vacation ISLAND in scandinavia. She's scandinavian and would consider herself a feminist (looking back I should have dumped her the moment she said she considers herself a feminist) to legitimize how slutty she'd been in her teens. She'd be pissed when I would not be able to pick her up at uni, when she could take the bus which would take the same amount of time. She'd cook for me from time to time yea, but the food was total vegan shit and tasted like sand. She wouldn't even offer to pay for the drinks when we would be out for dinner, yet would use the shitty job she had as excuse for any shitty behavior she had. She was paying only 1/3 of the rent of the house, supposed to wipe the floors once a week, but would always put up a fight to do that 30min chore... man I can go on with that list. I believe the only reason why I stuck with that bitch till the end was because being out in public with an extremely hot girl gave me some kind of ego boost.

It was such a great awakening when I started seeing other girls that would make my bed in the morning, clean the kitchen, or make me delicious food when they heard my stomach grumbling after we had sex. So yes, I completely agree: girls are either givers or takers.