[von_doom]

Hello everyone,

First post on this board and looking forward to participating. Came here through ROK.. good lord I wish I found this place sooner...

Wanted to pick your brain on something.

Workplace situation with a girl who worked directly under me. 29 y.o. really cute and cool. I am 10 years older and a single, never married. If it matters, I'm pretty athletic and "alpha" looking (i.e. full head of hair, 6'4" /245 lbs/ 19in. arms, 34 in. waist..(I hope that did not come off as braggart-dbag).. it was just to give you an idea)

Anyway, we got along great. Since a) it was work and I was her boss, and b) I don't shit where I eat - I never pushed anything and I would say I was never a supplicating beta around her - although objectively, she's hot and smart.. basically my kinda girl. I was always controlled and super professional and never really got into her personal life - therefore I guess you could say we had a relaxed "workplace friends" vibe. She worked with us about six months, directly under me the last three. Her last day was almost two weeks ago, as she took a new job that offered her more money than we can manage right now. (we are a start-up, but she said that the only reason she was leaving was because she needed the extra money from the pay bump to pay her bills, and that once we got up and running to please look her up...)

This week, I get a really sweet thank you card from her in the mail on Monday, I note this because everyone got a thank you card, but mine was beyond the rote "thanks and it was great working with you" that the others got, mine was really personalized and heartfelt going on and on about how much she admires me and loves working with me and blah blah blah (basically for exhibiting red pill non-beta behavior) and how she hopes we are able to work again together in the future..basically she took up the whole damn card.

Yesterday I get a pretty thick Churchill biography from her in the mail. No one else got anything. Surprised to say the least.

So...what do you guys think? At the very least I should send her a reply thank you note, which to be honest, I like the idea of, as it's very old school, and let's face it, kinda masculine..depending on what you write...

Also, as to anything else...I'm loath to go right for it, as I have no idea what her level of attraction is for me (if any) and I have the additional concern, as far as pushing the relationship to something more intimate, as we just worked together and it could come off as kind of creepy...besides I've got 2 other girls in rotation that I'm working on...

So...what do you guys think? At the very least I want to write back to thank her, but how about the other stuff? I kinda want to.. but am thinking maybe I should wait and give her some time to miss me a bit, since I'm really in no rush.. Just curious and any advice would be greatly appreciated.

Thanks in advance,
DOOM.

[kaotic]

Newbie Section

Given the follow is true:
1. You didn't make advances her at your current job.
2. She quit working for you.

I don't see anything wrong with going after a woman who doesn't work with you anymore. If you want to play it cool then write her back or suggest drinks as a thank you and gauge her interest in you.

[C.Contrary]

Drinks to "catch up," then venue change to your place to "relax and listen to music or something." She digs you--smash it.

[pro14]

(09-24-2014 04:36 PM)von_doom Wrote:  

maybe I should wait and give her some time to miss me a bit

yes wait a few weeks maybe she'll send panties in the mail instead of books

seems like 'the iron is hot' right now my friend, she's taking the time to mail you a letter and send you a book. so if you want it, I wouldn't wait.

however you have the concerns about coming off as creepy. I hear that because I also do not like to come off as creepy. I've worked with guys who have tried to bang all the chicks at work, even the married ones. It pissed me off but at the same time, they were getting laid and clearly the girls wanted it too. so get drinks and see where the vibe takes you, you'll know what to do at that point. nothing creepy about that.

unless you're worried about your own reputation - as in - " I heard he banged so and so as soon as soon as she left." if that's the case keep it on the straight and just go with the girls you got who are not associated with work.

final thought - in a couple of years will you look back and say 'damn, I should have banged that chick ..."

[AneroidOcean]

(09-24-2014 04:36 PM)von_doom Wrote:  

Hello everyone,

First post on this board and looking forward to participating. Came here through ROK.. good lord I wish I found this place sooner...

Wanted to pick your brain on something.

Workplace situation with a girl who worked directly under me. 29 y.o. really cute and cool. I am 10 years older and a single, never married. If it matters, I'm pretty athletic and "alpha" looking (i.e. full head of hair, 6'4" /245 lbs/ 19in. arms, 34 in. waist..(I hope that did not come off as braggart-dbag).. it was just to give you an idea)

Anyway, we got along great. Since a) it was work and I was her boss, and b) I don't shit where I eat - I never pushed anything and I would say I was never a supplicating beta around her - although objectively, she's hot and smart.. basically my kinda girl. I was always controlled and super professional and never really got into her personal life - therefore I guess you could say we had a relaxed "workplace friends" vibe. She worked with us about six months, directly under me the last three. Her last day was almost two weeks ago, as she took a new job that offered her more money than we can manage right now. (we are a start-up, but she said that the only reason she was leaving was because she needed the extra money from the pay bump to pay her bills, and that once we got up and running to please look her up...)

This week, I get a really sweet thank you card from her in the mail on Monday, I note this because everyone got a thank you card, but mine was beyond the rote "thanks and it was great working with you" that the others got, mine was really personalized and heartfelt going on and on about how much she admires me and loves working with me and blah blah blah (basically for exhibiting red pill non-beta behavior) and how she hopes we are able to work again together in the future..basically she took up the whole damn card.

Yesterday I get a pretty thick Churchill biography from her in the mail. No one else got anything. Surprised to say the least.

So...what do you guys think? At the very least I should send her a reply thank you note, which to be honest, I like the idea of, as it's very old school, and let's face it, kinda masculine..depending on what you write...

Also, as to anything else...I'm loath to go right for it, as I have no idea what her level of attraction is for me (if any) and I have the additional concern, as far as pushing the relationship to something more intimate, as we just worked together and it could come off as kind of creepy...besides I've got 2 other girls in rotation that I'm working on...

So...what do you guys think? At the very least I want to write back to thank her, but how about the other stuff? I kinda want to.. but am thinking maybe I should wait and give her some time to miss me a bit, since I'm really in no rush.. Just curious and any advice would be greatly appreciated.

Thanks in advance,
DOOM.

A lot of this 1st post reeks of troll.

No reason for it to come off as creepy to grab a drink to catch up, then flirting, escalating physicality, etc... If she says anything along the lines of let's just be friends or anything like that, move on, but nothing you listed in any way would lead me to believe you shouldn't try to meet up/bang.

[von_doom]

Troll? Really? Wow. Harsh board. Just being honest I guess. I did say it was my first post. Anyway, thank you all for the advice -pretty much what I knew I had to do. Sack up and take the shot.

Great board BTW. Thanks again!

DOOM

[Griprip08]

Some people are quick to paint a shitty picture with first posters I've noticed if things are misinterpreted. The point to take away from it is that there is so much info on here already that most of what you are looking for could be found without posting in some cases. However I'm with you, sometimes you just have to hear other people say it, even though you pretty much already know what you have to do. Not to mention this doesnt seem like a typical "run of the mill" situation (even though it can be quickly turned into one).

In my opinion, use the "get drinks and catch up" bit to thank her for the gifts, and definitely wait as long as possible before responding to her gift/asking her out. That way when you hit her up a week later and ask her out for drinks, its either going to be a yes or a no, and If she does give you the yes, without any kind of hesitation or questions or anything, then that's pretty much her "signing up for it" and you're in. Just my two cents and good luck pal let us know how it goes. Also, welcome to the community.

[bojangles]

Mate, text or call her - "Lets meet up for a drink, I'm free on ....."