[the-dream]

delete

[ryanf]

Got any hookah bars in your area? That's where I was taking girls < 21 when I didn't have my own place. Now that I do, I still take them to a hookah bar but one that is within walking distance of my place. Those bars are almost always 18+ instead of 21+, some serve alcohol, most serve food. The music and atmosphere is usually laid back, and there are typically couches where you can sit close and escalate. Walks in the park are good, if the weather permits. I've never been to NY, so I'm sure some other guys from that area can chime in with specific suggestions. But you are in one of the largest, most lively cities in the world, there should be plenty to do that doesn't cost much or anything at all.

As far as not getting used, you have to charge that to the game. Women use men for resources, that's nature. That's like asking how to get a lion to stop eating gazelles. Ain't gonna happen. Grin and move on. Keep the dates cheap, and if a woman tries to "upgrade" to a dinner/drinks date, she's likely using you. Proceed accordingly.

[tallandblonde]

(09-23-2014 10:06 PM)ryanf Wrote:  

Got any hookah bars in your area? That's where I was taking girls < 21 when I didn't have my own place. Now that I do, I still take them to a hookah bar but one that is within walking distance of my place. Those bars are almost always 18+ instead of 21+, some serve alcohol, most serve food. The music and atmosphere is usually laid back, and there are typically couches where you can sit close and escalate. Walks in the park are good, if the weather permits. I've never been to NY, so I'm sure some other guys from that area can chime in with specific suggestions. But you are in one of the largest, most lively cities in the world, there should be plenty to do that doesn't cost much or anything at all.

As far as not getting used, you have to charge that to the game. Women use men for resources, that's nature. That's like asking how to get a lion to stop eating gazelles. Ain't gonna happen. Grin and move on. Keep the dates cheap, and if a woman tries to "upgrade" to a dinner/drinks date, she's likely using you. Proceed accordingly.

Good idea on the Hookah bar. I'm 22 so going out for "drinks" has been my go to date idea for a while, but that isn't so much an option with younger women. Should have done that yesterday when I met up with a girl that was 20 years old.

To OP, you already know this already, but I wouldn't spend that much money on a women that has demonstrated little to no value to you. Even if you're the richest guy in the world, she still has done nothing for her to deserve you spending money on her like what you did with girl #2. You're just training her to think that she can do absolutely nothing and then get things from you. That said, I'll pay for a girl's drinks when we do a first date at a bar, so maybe I'm a little bit of a hypocrite, but the point is not to over do it. Anyways, with girl #2, you made a mistake from the start having her lead you places, that was probably the beginning of the end.

Are you on your own? If so, you can just get a bottle of wine for your place and then invite girls back for drinks or to smoke (if you're into that) after another activity where you meet in public and can make her feel more comfortable. It's not so much having a good place to go to begin with but being able to confidently lead and move the date along to a private place so you can get laid if that's your end goal. If that's the case, might want to make sure that you meet somewhere that's within walking distance to where you live.

[HonantheBarbarian]

Take the bitch for a walk in the park, bring a joint

Take her for on a quick hike, bring a joint

Walk around a museum, its free, bring alchohol and/or a joint

You get my gist. But hey man stop overthinking these tinder dates. My cousin is doing the same shit, taking them around etc. I wouldnt be buying them lunch and shit. Girls on tinder are there for a reason. Why exactly can't you bring them back to your hostel?

[HonantheBarbarian]

Take the bitch for a walk in the park, bring a joint

Take her for on a quick hike, bring a joint

Walk around a museum, its free, bring alchohol and/or a joint

You get my gist. But hey man stop overthinking these tinder dates. My cousin is doing the same shit, taking them around etc. I wouldnt be buying them lunch and shit. Girls on tinder are there for a reason. Why exactly can't you bring them back to your hostel?