I thought I wouldn't ever come back here, but apparently I don't learn from my mistakes. A week ago, I was with a friend of mine who is a natural with women - very good looking, rugby player, etc. Since he knew about my unusual situation, the people involved, and was trustworthy, I told him my story and asked him what I thought I should do.
His response: "Have you considered that you may simply have asked her for her phone number the wrong way? Because what I heard was that she was going to give you it, but then you acted as though she wasn't important to you by saying you collected numbers as a hobby. It sounds like you've miscalibrated this girl severely (he knows a little about game) - you assume she wants an asshole but she really wants you to show more interest in her."
Me: "Well, how do I do that? I thought you weren't supposed to let a girl know you liked her that way. Isn't that beta?"
Him: "Not if you come from a position of non-neediness. How do you think I get with so many women? If I never let them know, they're not going to come looking for me, are they?"
Me: "But you're a natural, it's not the same. They do come looking for you. You go to parties and things like that, you can drink..."
Him: "Look, I know it's extremely difficult for you. That's why you've got to start small - and you definitely are. Think of it as practice. Since you're so funny and good with words, write her a message on facebook. Make it amusing to read. In it, apologize indirectly, so as to maintain plausible deniability, and ask her for her number a second time. State your intentions directly, and make it sound as though you are being generous in asking a second time. Tell her to only respond if she's interested, and to not reply if she isn't."
Me: "Are you sure that's a good idea? It sounds try-hard and desperate."
Him: "What's the worst thing that happens? She rejects you a second time. She did it once already, so things can only improve! Who's more successful with women, you or me?"
Well, he had a point there, and so I wrote that message. It was very funny, and I sent it. The next day, Brown Sugar's roommate comes running up to me at dinner. "Oh my god! You are so amazing!" "I know," I say. "No, I mean that message you sent! It was fantastic! She says she's going to write back to you!" "I'm a pro at this sort of thing, woman," I say, turning back to my entree. She punches me in the arm. "Well you sure make a lot of mistakes for a pro. You should know better than to ask a woman for her phone number and when she asks why tell her that you collect them as a hobby! You're supposed to tell her the truth!" "Don't be so uptight," I say, and change the subject.
So I wait. And wait. I sent the message last Tuesday. I don't see or hear anything from Brown Sugar until Saturday at dinner, when I am eating with the roommate again and she joins us. "I need to write back to you," she said, smiling. "You're breaking my heart, woman," I smirk, and do not speak to her for the remainder of the meal. I finish eating, and get up to go. "Are you leaving?" asks the roommate. "Yeah." "Are you going out tonight?" she says, with a funny smile on her face. "Dunno, maybe." "Well, if you want to come out with us - you know, feel like being social and having fun for a change - you have my number!" "That I do," I say, and turn to go. "Bye!" says Brown Sugar. I do not look back or respond, for although my exterior is calm, my mind is racing. I know what is supposed to happen, according to the roommate's designs. I am supposed to go out with them and hook up with Brown Sugar. But I know that will not happen, because I cannot dance or drink, and she is extremely talented at doing so. I also don't even know if Brown Sugar is even really interested in me. It takes no time at all to type in 7 digits into a computer, and she could have given me her number when I was RIGHT THERE IN FRONT OF HER. Was I supposed to ask her for it then? I wanted to, but was afraid that would be too needy! I went back to my room, and had another anxiety attack. I spent the evening alone in my room. She still hasn't replied.
My instincts are telling me that I should give up. She's had plenty of time to make something happen and hasn't done anything yet. But my instincts are also usually bad. The way I see it, there are several possibilities:
1. She isn't interested in me, but because her roommate thinks I'm wonderful, she's going along with it.
2. She isn't interested in me, and she and her roommate are collaborating together to play an extremely cruel joke. This may sound like paranoia but it happened to me in middle school and I can't convince myself it's not a possibility.
3. She is interested, but not very. It will take quite a bit of effort to get in her pants.
4. She is interested, but is playing hard to get, since she knows I'm interested in her and my market value does not greatly exceed hers. It will take a great deal of time and effort but will work out provided I don't screw up again.
Unfortunately, I don't have much time. I was thinking that I was not going to contact her in any way until she responded, but now I wonder if that's the right thing to do. There are only two more months left in the school year.
I'm certain someone will tell me: move on, she's not worth the trouble, explore other prospects. Problem is, I don't have ANY prospects. This is because pretty much all other girls I've met are not anywhere near as attractive as she is, and she's only a 6.5 (you guys would likely consider her a 4 because you guys prefer really skinny girls.) I'm not interested in any other girls because they don't interest me (ones that I would have the slightest chance with). In fact, I'm actually not even that interested in Brown Sugar, to be honest - I'm just using her as practice because I'm lonely and need to practice game. I don't really have any other options available to me - the girls at my school are average-looking in general and would make you seasoned players recoil with horror. Yet I can't even seem to be successful with her. Sigh.
So what do I do, given this information? Am I going to starve in a bakery forever? Or am I overthinking things as usual?
His response: "Have you considered that you may simply have asked her for her phone number the wrong way? Because what I heard was that she was going to give you it, but then you acted as though she wasn't important to you by saying you collected numbers as a hobby. It sounds like you've miscalibrated this girl severely (he knows a little about game) - you assume she wants an asshole but she really wants you to show more interest in her."
Me: "Well, how do I do that? I thought you weren't supposed to let a girl know you liked her that way. Isn't that beta?"
Him: "Not if you come from a position of non-neediness. How do you think I get with so many women? If I never let them know, they're not going to come looking for me, are they?"
Me: "But you're a natural, it's not the same. They do come looking for you. You go to parties and things like that, you can drink..."
Him: "Look, I know it's extremely difficult for you. That's why you've got to start small - and you definitely are. Think of it as practice. Since you're so funny and good with words, write her a message on facebook. Make it amusing to read. In it, apologize indirectly, so as to maintain plausible deniability, and ask her for her number a second time. State your intentions directly, and make it sound as though you are being generous in asking a second time. Tell her to only respond if she's interested, and to not reply if she isn't."
Me: "Are you sure that's a good idea? It sounds try-hard and desperate."
Him: "What's the worst thing that happens? She rejects you a second time. She did it once already, so things can only improve! Who's more successful with women, you or me?"
Well, he had a point there, and so I wrote that message. It was very funny, and I sent it. The next day, Brown Sugar's roommate comes running up to me at dinner. "Oh my god! You are so amazing!" "I know," I say. "No, I mean that message you sent! It was fantastic! She says she's going to write back to you!" "I'm a pro at this sort of thing, woman," I say, turning back to my entree. She punches me in the arm. "Well you sure make a lot of mistakes for a pro. You should know better than to ask a woman for her phone number and when she asks why tell her that you collect them as a hobby! You're supposed to tell her the truth!" "Don't be so uptight," I say, and change the subject.
So I wait. And wait. I sent the message last Tuesday. I don't see or hear anything from Brown Sugar until Saturday at dinner, when I am eating with the roommate again and she joins us. "I need to write back to you," she said, smiling. "You're breaking my heart, woman," I smirk, and do not speak to her for the remainder of the meal. I finish eating, and get up to go. "Are you leaving?" asks the roommate. "Yeah." "Are you going out tonight?" she says, with a funny smile on her face. "Dunno, maybe." "Well, if you want to come out with us - you know, feel like being social and having fun for a change - you have my number!" "That I do," I say, and turn to go. "Bye!" says Brown Sugar. I do not look back or respond, for although my exterior is calm, my mind is racing. I know what is supposed to happen, according to the roommate's designs. I am supposed to go out with them and hook up with Brown Sugar. But I know that will not happen, because I cannot dance or drink, and she is extremely talented at doing so. I also don't even know if Brown Sugar is even really interested in me. It takes no time at all to type in 7 digits into a computer, and she could have given me her number when I was RIGHT THERE IN FRONT OF HER. Was I supposed to ask her for it then? I wanted to, but was afraid that would be too needy! I went back to my room, and had another anxiety attack. I spent the evening alone in my room. She still hasn't replied.
My instincts are telling me that I should give up. She's had plenty of time to make something happen and hasn't done anything yet. But my instincts are also usually bad. The way I see it, there are several possibilities:
1. She isn't interested in me, but because her roommate thinks I'm wonderful, she's going along with it.
2. She isn't interested in me, and she and her roommate are collaborating together to play an extremely cruel joke. This may sound like paranoia but it happened to me in middle school and I can't convince myself it's not a possibility.
3. She is interested, but not very. It will take quite a bit of effort to get in her pants.
4. She is interested, but is playing hard to get, since she knows I'm interested in her and my market value does not greatly exceed hers. It will take a great deal of time and effort but will work out provided I don't screw up again.
Unfortunately, I don't have much time. I was thinking that I was not going to contact her in any way until she responded, but now I wonder if that's the right thing to do. There are only two more months left in the school year.
I'm certain someone will tell me: move on, she's not worth the trouble, explore other prospects. Problem is, I don't have ANY prospects. This is because pretty much all other girls I've met are not anywhere near as attractive as she is, and she's only a 6.5 (you guys would likely consider her a 4 because you guys prefer really skinny girls.) I'm not interested in any other girls because they don't interest me (ones that I would have the slightest chance with). In fact, I'm actually not even that interested in Brown Sugar, to be honest - I'm just using her as practice because I'm lonely and need to practice game. I don't really have any other options available to me - the girls at my school are average-looking in general and would make you seasoned players recoil with horror. Yet I can't even seem to be successful with her. Sigh.
So what do I do, given this information? Am I going to starve in a bakery forever? Or am I overthinking things as usual?
![[Image: punchballs.gif]](https://rooshvforum.network/images/smilies/new/punchballs.gif)
And... two steps back. ![[Image: bash.gif]](https://rooshvforum.network/images/smilies/new/bash.gif)
![[Image: lol.gif]](https://rooshvforum.network/images/smilies/new/lol.gif)
