[cerodragon]

I feel I have a hard time not living in the past. basically had my chance but now its long gone and im in the friendzone with this girl and i can't stop thinking about her as if i still had a chance when I can see its clearly over.
I want to just get her off my mind. but still retain w/e relationship i have with her

[iknowexactly]

Just get even the most minimal make out with another chick.. it will start to redirect the circuits in your mind/glands to her messaging system instead of the old crush..

It's all just chemistry

And remember the unconditional love you hopefully got from your mother will never be approached by other women, especially younger, more modern Americans who are conditioned to not acknowledge their nurturing instincts.

To oversimplify, for first world girls under 30, think of them as 70% parasites, 30% nurturers, when they feel like it. It's different overseas.

[Saga]

Go out and approach 10 girls in the next 24 hours.

[Parlay44]

New pussy always clears your mind ~Chris Rock

[Fortis]

Delete numbers, pictures etc.

Ignore texts.

Approach other bitches.

profit???

I don't mean to be dismissive of your question, but I think you already knew the answer before you asked. As much as it sucks, you just have to move on.

[WilliamShatnersEgo]

The reason she doesn't like you is you're being a little bitch. She sees you clinging to whatever attention she deigned to give you and it reeks of shit to her.

[cerodragon]

(07-15-2014 08:10 PM)WilliamShatnersEgo Wrote:  

The reason she doesn't like you is you're being a little bitch. She sees you clinging to whatever attention she deigned to give you and it reeks of shit to her.

could be true. How about adding a solution ?

[NiceNEasy]

Next! As the fellas say: unsubscribe. Go hit on some gals. Then when you bang a new one she'll suddenly become a distant memory. Next time you see her you will have taken that pussy off the pedestal and put yourself at the top of the mountain and you will find that shes the one chasing after you.

[LaserBear]

Best way to get over one girl, is to get under another.

[AneroidOcean]

(07-15-2014 06:44 PM)cerodragon Wrote:  

I feel I have a hard time not living in the past. basically had my chance but now its long gone and im in the friendzone with this girl and i can't stop thinking about her as if i still had a chance when I can see its clearly over.
I want to just get her off my mind. but still retain w/e relationship i have with her

You're not willing to let go of whatever relationship you have with her. Hence, you're stuck on her and always will be to some extent.

Cut all ties. Burn everything you have kept of your "relationship" you have with her. Scream and yell about it. Cry if you have to. Then move the fuck on. Only time will really reinforce this, but you have to TAKE ACTION.

Go explore new things, take some short trips, take a longer one if you can afford to.

Do NOT, do NOT keep a relationship with her. Not until you have fucked a few girls and you can see her as nothing other than what she is. Just another girl.

[Dalaran1991]

I think there should be a sticky on one-itis.

Onenitis sucks but a lot of us have been there. It sucks even more if you think you had your chance with her. Then your hamster starts running "if only I did this and that, she would be back" which is not true.

I have been there big time and it was this onenitis that made me red pill, so I was thankful for it. I know how you feel. It took me two years to get over it. During those two years, I accomplish a lot, had a fulfilling life but stayed away from pussy. Which is why I couldnt forget her. I went to therapy once or twice per week for a year. None of that help.

You know what help? I took up dancing and started meeting and having fun with lots of women. Suddenly you realize that that special girl is nothing special, like nothing at all. You realize that why pine over one girl when theres plenty of fish out there. I face palmed myself and laughed: all that therapy, all that instropection is not worth shit compared to going to bar/dance club and hitting on girls. It will also makes you see yourself in a much better light. No need to do any self-improvement or take some time off (though they are all great), just go hit on girls and it will be fine.

It sounds cliché, but go out and meet some other women. And for your fuck sake dont you dare compare them to your girl. What happens is that, you approach a woman and in 5 seconds you say "she is nothing like my girl etc" and other bs. Give the girls a chance to help you get better.

Also, cut all contact with the girl if possible. Dont talk to other friends about her, dont go on forums ask question about her. Erase all notions of being anything less than a lover with this woman. No friend or acquaintance or shit like that. Bc I assure you, that girl is sucking other dudes right now while she s telling you I just want to be friends. I dont know her but Im 100% sure, it is always that way.

Tbh, whenever the word friendzone appears, a guy on this forum is smirking "theres a bitch I can fuck while her beta orbiters are still dreaming of having kids with her".

If that doesnt kick your ego and spur you to some action, I dont know what will.

[PapayaTapper]

(07-15-2014 06:44 PM)cerodragon Wrote:  

I feel I have a hard time not living in the past. basically had my chance but now its long gone and im in the friendzone with this girl and i can't stop thinking about her as if i still had a chance when I can see its clearly over.
I want to just get her off my mind. but still retain w/e relationship i have with her

You will NEVER EVER EVER EVER have a chance with her until you 100% TRULY ABSOLUTELY don't give shit about her and she KNOWS it. That's irony of it all but...the FACT

[Libertas]

Move toward your other long term goals (fitness, money, etc.).

Get out and see a lot of girls.

Get out and approach some other girls.

Don't be in stasis.

[JustJay]

(07-15-2014 06:44 PM)cerodragon Wrote:  

I feel I have a hard time not living in the past. basically had my chance but now its long gone and im in the friendzone with this girl and i can't stop thinking about her as if i still had a chance when I can see its clearly over.
I want to just get her off my mind. but still retain w/e relationship i have with her

I was once like you, letting past pains take control over my life in the now. Nothing good will come of it. The longer you try to hang on, the more vulnerable/exploitable you are. The more weaker you become.

Is that who you are? Weak? It's as what you said. Your chance is gone. Own up to that and realize that hey...plenty more women out there to plow.

Pick yourself up after your tears have dried and move forward.

[Fortis]

Remember this key point: she isn't texting/keeping in touch with you because she gives a shit about you. she's texting you because you make her feel good and you don't demand anything from her. if you suddenly started fucking and ignoring her, she'd find some other beta orbiter to do the things you once did. Since the fuck train has passed, you should delete her number, hide her social media account and get out there and talk to other women.

I don't say all of this to you from a high horse. I've had this happen to me more times than I can count. That's why I found the forum. You should listen to everything these guys are telling you. You probably won't, but eventually you'll come around and realise that this girl is rather small in the vast scope of your life.

[Beyond Borders]

1. New pussy. Even just bantering and flirting with a few different girls can really be therapeutic and start to clear the mind funk.

2. Meditation (develops more control over your thinking patterns). I seriously can't stress this enough. It's a lot easier to start with this if you do so before your mind is scattered and your emotions are running high, but if you just persist with 5 minutes a day (maybe a few times a day if you're feeling scattered), you will gain more and more control over your emotions fast.

3. Reframing and changing your perspective. This quote helps me when the decisions other people make frustrate me:

Quote:

"If we regard ourselves as free agents, and the personalities surrounding us as the puppets of determinism, we shall have arrived at the working compromise from which the finest results of living can be obtained." - Arnold Bennett

By thinking of other people in this way, they (especially women) actually become humorously predictable, and it becomes harder to resent their decisions. Instead you shrug and laugh and focus on controlling the things in your life you can control - work and getting in shape being good places to focus that attention. This is the type of mindset that helps me lean back with a smug IDGAF smirk on my face when I should be angry at a chick, and suddenly she's the one who is more emotional than me, even if I should be the one that's worked up.

Women hate it when they can't phase you, in a good way. It makes their hamster put in over-time. You can almost hear the wheel cranking and it's little heaving gasps for air.

But it's more about your own feelings than initiating a response. And maybe looking at your situation in another way would work better for you.

The important thing is to realize you can decide how to perceive things in your mind if you want. You're only blowing this chick up in importance because of your ego (rejections especially is a bitch) and emotional state. NLP may also help in this regard - listen to a few Anthony Robbins cds because he really brings it down to the level.

4. Get busy with friends - go out chasing girls or staying busy doing cool new things that keep you from dwelling.

5. Self Improvement audios. I find these easier to focus on than books when my mind is running away on me. Anthony Robbins, as mentioned above, is a good one. When I get pumped up on self improvement, I find it hard to let something so trivial fuck with my head. Let someone show you the world in a different light.

6. New pussy. This one deserves a second mention.

[Chaos]

(07-18-2014 05:40 AM)Beyond Borders Wrote:  

1. New pussy. Even just bantering and flirting with a few different girls can really be therapeutic and start to clear the mind funk.

6. New pussy. This one deserves a second mention.

This and nothing else. This is by far the most effective method.

[Beyond Borders]

^ Sure, that's fair play if you have the game, but the guys who sweat a woman rejecting them most may be lacking in this department and can't always just run out and supercharge the pipeline on a moment's notice.

It can also be frustrating if you go out hoping to get some new tail to ease your mind and just get rejected again, which isn't an uncommon way for a dry spell to start. Girls come in waves for most guys.

So it helps to have a few other tricks up your sleeve for controlling your emotions.

[Fortis]

^ I think online game can help these guys. Even just getting a girl to give you her number online can make you forget about the other girl who wasn't going to bang you.

[Yatagan]

(07-18-2014 05:47 AM)Chaos Wrote:  

(07-18-2014 05:40 AM)Beyond Borders Wrote:  

1. New pussy. Even just bantering and flirting with a few different girls can really be therapeutic and start to clear the mind funk.

6. New pussy. This one deserves a second mention.

This and nothing else. This is by far the most effective method.

This also applies to getting one's mind after a breakup as well. Being out and about and pursuing other girls(even if it leads nowhere) was therapeutic after my most recent breakup.

[KC4]

Fuck her best friend , did the job for me . Other wise its just to move on . new girl ,new start