[Noir]

Hey buddy.

You lack the sense of entitlement over women. You entered with the expectations of it being some amazing thing. It's your first time.

My first time was at the backseat of a car at a view point when I was 17, with a girl who I was infatuated with and then she hurt me. I fucked her just so I could get it over with for my ego and not speak to her again.

Did I enjoy it? No. Was I satisfied? No. Did I learn a lesson? Fuck yes.

I rejected sex because I wanted to lose my virginity to the girl who made me read game, after she rejected me. My ego got involved. It was either that or a super hot girl (who were all in relationships).

I rejected prostitutes, even when my uncle offered to take me. It is kind of a thing in Cyprus. I have grown up with strip clubs, bookies and general p4p.

Lack of emotional connection, no conquering, condoms, paying for sex; all these factors are really consequences of what is underlying.

Why do you have approach anxiety? Why are you still reading?

You can put bandaids all day over your wound but you're ignoring why it exists in the first place.

Take the positives out of this. The psychological barrier of being a virgin no longer applies. Stop comparing yourself to others at 24 and compare yourself to where you want to be. Be real with yourself.

Stop placing expectations on moments. Get out of this 'instant gratification' mentality you have brainwashed into your head.

I have lost count of how many girls I have banged, because it doesn't matter. Some I forgot about because they were terrible or not worth it. Others stand out for both good and bad reasons. Notwithstanding hindsight, I -wanted- to in the moment. I have zero regrets as that formed who I am today.

It doesn't matter how you feel about certain people, past, present, future. You have the power over what affects your emotional mindset. Are you happy?

If no, stop placing emphasis on women and them satisfying you. Satisfy yourself and draw them into your tornado of desire.

If yes, what makes you happy? How can you spread this?

I live my life on principles and maxims.

A few are applicable here:

- I want to leave every woman I meet better off. I have had 19 year olds tell me they want to marry a guy like me, before even banging. I have girls who inbox me 2 years later on telling me they still haven't found a guy who can bring out the emotions that I bring within them. I have 43 year olds showering me with gifts, because I gave them their 2nd orgasm in their life and listened to them. I have other girls who wake me up with the coffee just the way I like it, black.

Ask yourself why. I am 23 and I compare myself to what I feel I deserve and have worked for. If I compare myself to people my age, it is retarded, most people are not happy or successful. I see where I want to be in a year from now and fucking aim higher than that. This ambition is attractive.


- Women just want to be taken. They want you to walk the walk as much as you talk the talk. All this consumption of information will just make you more aware; they can't mindread and see that you know your shit. Show them. Take them. Make them yours and bring out the nasty in them.

You are the leader, you have the 'cheat code' to make them feel awesome, appreciated and sexy. Use all this information instead of replacing it with new information. The experience will teach you, not some words on a screen.


- Do you first. 'Going out to practice' is bullshit. I approached 6 girls yesterday. All randomly, they were near me and I was inquisitive as to who they were. I saw on in the elevator of my building and while we were waiting, I blitzed through some questions, challenged her and just before I got out of the elevator, I told her my apartment number and told her if she blazes, to come over. She said she would love to but tomorrow (today). I have already forgotten about her, I have 2 girls on tinder requesting a meet tonight. This all took place in the matter of 6 hours. These aren't even my regulars. When I left my door, my thought was not 'I will now practice'. It was 'let's go have some fun and learn something new today'.

Every woman has a story, every person has a tale. I am interested. I want to educate myself with experiences and emotions. I want to learn. I want to share. Whenever I leave my house, this is my mindset. It is ingrained.

What do I want to do tonight? I wanna record a new set and make some money on poker. That is me. That is what I want to do this Wednesday. Women come and go and I will pursue when I feel like it. Otherwise, I will let them pursue me.

I go to upscale strip clubs. Not to get laid. I enjoy the feminine energy. The sexiness. The smell. I am usually the youngest yet centre of attention. I come with no expectations, just to see some gravity defying movements and enjoy the feminine body at its peak twisting and turning and inspiring my nasty side.

I ask people where they are from. I know how to say hi how are you in over 11 languages. Russian strippers love me. Italian foreign exchange students love me. French coworkers adore me. Spanish neighbours want me. Not because I say hi to them. Because I am willing to make an effort and place the ball in their court in light of my cool-ass personality.
It seems as if you're not 'feeling it'. Why?

Don't stress. Stop consuming information and look at the spine of the issue. Why do I not want it? How can I want it? Is it for me?

I love women. Every single aspect of it. I am thrilled by the power I have of transforming strangers into lovers, bringing out the deepest intimate desires within a short time frame.

It is fun. I make it fun. Exciting.

I have zero expectations of them when I meet them. My expectations arise when they want to be serious or have something more stable. Do they match? Sure. Do they not? Next. Do they want to meet my other girlfriends? Sweet.


Sort your confidence out and regain your manliness. Stop being weak and get some balls.


ou're in the UK, it should be fucking easy. I was a foreigner and had a harder time than most locals and I still cleaned up. This was before I reached my peak.

IF you're not in university and still out of London, it will be difficult. I can tell you stories on end from London, when I was 20-23 hooking up with all nationalities, age groups etc.

Only logistics were lame but that is still easy to overcome.

For now though, stop the information overload and go do. Go discover what makes you tick and be real. You're just following recipes now. Go freestyle, that is what attracts. Congruence.

I say this to inspire you, not to demean you. You have potential but no one will give you an opportunity but yourself.

I gave you a chance by spending 15 minutes writing this up. What chance are you willing to give yourself?

PM me if you want.

[Simeon_Strangelight]

@Daytona

At least it helped you to de-mystify sex a bit. Your experience is not unusual to what was the norm even not so long ago, when the world was not filled with a sea of sluts and premarital sex was a lot more rare. Fathers often brought their teenage sons to the brothel, while the wealthy ones expected their sons to fuck some pretty maids in their households. The 1950s in the US and UK had roughly the same amount of prostitutes as they have now, but with a population significantly lower. The same is true for almost all Western countries. The reason for this was that men had to pay for it - in some countries this is still the case due to a variety for reasons. There is frankly no shame in it whatsoever. It is just an inferior experience to a woman truly desiring you.

The self-confidence with women does not come with paying for sex, as I know guys who spend 5000$+ every month on escorts and are still as clueless about attracting them as before.

You fake it until you make it. You learn Game, maybe do a bootcamp by the excellent London-Daygamers to boost your skill. With each step you become more self-confident - first you get smiles, some attraction, then dates and finally bangs. Going on a bootcamp might help you a lot, especially if you ask them honestly how you can improve.

[Atavistic]

Prostitution is a horrible way to lose your virginity.

Obviously it’s not a problem if you have notches under your bedpost, and know how to seduce a woman. In fact, it’s never a problem once you start having notches. I’ve been stuck in the same boat for some years now. Having slept with hundreds of hookers, I still haven’t been able to seduce a woman yet for free. I’d imagine it could take some time and effort. I’m just very socially awkward, not overweight, work-out and so forth. So not sure how to get my first notch. I wouldn’t advocate losing your virginity to a hooker because you’re still stuck in not knowing how to seduce a woman. With the way things have been going with for me, I have to make some major self-improvements for my first notch. I’ve gotten close on one occasion, but unfortunately took the advice of the woman saying “we aren’t having sex.” What would you suggest?

[Beyond Borders]

(09-22-2014 03:46 PM)Hardy Daytona Wrote:  

(Side note: Always ask if they're a police officer to avoid entrapment or being the victim of a sting. Thanks Law & Order.)

Myth.

Be careful.

If you're looking for an understanding of where you stand in our legal system, fuck Law and Order - read this instead: http://www.amazon.com/The-Outlaws-Bible-...1893626296

(09-24-2014 04:43 AM)Zelcorpion Wrote:  

Your experience is not unusual to what was the norm even not so long ago, when the world was not filled with a sea of sluts and premarital sex was a lot more rare. Fathers often brought their teenage sons to the brothel, while the wealthy ones expected their sons to fuck some pretty maids in their households. The 1950s in the US and UK had roughly the same amount of prostitutes as they have now, but with a population significantly lower. The same is true for almost all Western countries. The reason for this was that men had to pay for it - in some countries this is still the case due to a variety for reasons. There is frankly no shame in it whatsoever. It is just an inferior experience to a woman truly desiring you.

Good points. Gives me a bit of perspective on the way things are in Southeast Asian culture. I'd always wondered what made it such a norm here; comparing it to the past of the Western world does illuminate it a bit.

I guess I can stop judging my local friends so much.

[BadWolf]

Mine went a 25 to a beautiful brown girl I met on the street in Brazil.

[Hardy Daytona]

(09-24-2014 03:28 AM)Noir Wrote:  

Why do you have approach anxiety? Why are you still reading?

You can put bandaids all day over your wound but you're ignoring why it exists in the first place.

Take the positives out of this. The psychological barrier of being a virgin no longer applies. Stop comparing yourself to others at 24 and compare yourself to where you want to be. Be real with yourself.

Stop placing expectations on moments. Get out of this 'instant gratification' mentality you have brainwashed into your head.

Well then, let's get real.
'This above all, to thine own self be true' - Hamlet Act 1 Scene 3
Why do I have approach anxiety?

I'd have to say that nurture contributed more than nature.
An journey through the education system that was exclusively all-male thus limiting my exposure to women. However I did have opportunities to learn and experience in the last few years which I squandered.

Why did I squander them? Because I didn't know how to use them efficiently. I was so focused on my studies and earning qualifications that I thought I needed for people I thought I needed to please that I didn't take them time to learn the lessons of life. There were some, but nowhere near as many as I could have.

Add to that maternal betrayal and incredible naivety and that about sums up why I have trouble approaching women.

Why am I still reading?
Because it's safe.
I try to set aside my pride, but damn near every time I go out the memories of humiliation come back to me and I stubbornly refuse to take a chance.
The worst part is that a significant number of them were my own fault because I didn't know any better.

A wise man once said that life is an adventure in forgiveness.
But who's the hardest person of all to forgive? Oneself.
The demons inside, they laugh at the thought.
When you forgive someone else, they're not likely to turn you down and say "fuck that."
Trying to forgive myself though, it's "fuck that" all the time.
Maybe instead of forgive and forget it should be forgive and remember. Remember that tomorrow I'll have to wake up and try to forgive myself all over again and again, they way the heart keeps beating like a drum.

Be real with myself.
Well, things are comfortable at the moment. I don't have much to worry about, but unfortunately I have no direction.
There was an article on ROK not too long ago about how every man should have a primary mission.
Well I've lost mine.
I had career plans, a foundation to build on, a vision of what kind of man I wanted to be and how to achieve it. And I was told that I didn't make the cut.
It's harsh, but it's reality. And those that fortune would build up would just as easily destroy.
So now that I've lost sight of one dream I have to replace it with another.
That's all well and good except that I don't know how. I have to prioritize my happiness above others' but I don't know what will make me happy.

That's a lie. The one thing I could do right now that would make me happy would be to conquer a woman. And so the reason for my starting this thread comes full circle.

I've always been more of a thinker of a doer.
I'm doing the best I can do reverse it, but it's a gradual process and there's a lot of indoctrination to overcome.

The worst part of it is that I shouldn't be comparing myself to faceless words on the internet and yet here I am picturing what an inferior specimen I am compared to other users of this forum.

No, that's wrong. I am not inferior. I may not have wielded success yet but I've made a conscious effort to better myself and that's more than I've done in the past.

I feel like I'm a walking, typing contradiction. Or maybe I just embody the duality of man.

But I do know 1 thing.
Just over a month from now I'll be reunited with people that I used to think of as friends before purging unnecessary baggage from my life.
And in those 3 days I want to prove myself in every way that I can - physically, emotionally, psychologically.
They're not machines, they're men. And I have to be more man than them.

That is my immediate goal. That is what I'm working towards right now.

But doesn't that just mean that I'm comparing myself to others again?

ARGH THIS IS INFURIATING!

It feels like I'm constantly trying to reconcile all the different imaginings of how I should be.
I don't know how I should be. I don't even know what I know. I don't know what I don't know.

Okay, I'm drawing a line under this post.
I'm going to leave it and come back again in a week.
That's why I hate self-examination. I lose what little sense of certainty I have.

[Cheetah]

Quote:

I'd have to say that nurture contributed more than nature.
An journey through the education system that was exclusively all-male thus limiting my exposure to women. However I did have opportunities to learn and experience in the last few years which I squandered.

If you are social around men you can be social around women as well. Knowing that might make it easier. If you on the other hand think "oh, what to say, I am speaking with a women" then it will be harder even if you have the social ability needed to keep on a good conversation.

Quote:

I try to set aside my pride, but damn near every time I go out the memories of humiliation come back to me and I stubbornly refuse to take a chance.
The worst part is that a significant number of them were my own fault because I didn't know any better.

I don't think that other people in your situation "would have known" either. What is true is that lots of rejections are a part of gaming. Even the best players get alot of them. Knowing that might get you to understand that it's not unusual to get rejected, it's part of the game.

Quote:

The worst part of it is that I shouldn't be comparing myself to faceless words on the internet and yet here I am picturing what an inferior specimen I am compared to other users of this forum.

No, that's wrong. I am not inferior. I may not have wielded success yet but I've made a conscious effort to better myself and that's more than I've done in the past.

You say it yourself. Your present and past results might be inferior compared to most others while this is because of your wrong mindset that you had. If you think that you can't talk with a women you probably won't do so well. If you think that any rejection is a betrayl then that is not so good for gaming.

Supposed that you are reasonably social around other men and you don't look completely strange I think that you will do quite well with the right mindset.