[Carlos100]

I only discovered the manosphere and game science about a year ago. I'm going to proceed with the 100 approach challenge. I assume it's ok to keep a journal of it here in the newbie thread. I am married with children, so I don't go out that much at night on my own. Also, I haven't been traveling for work as much as I used to. So, it's going to take me awhile, I think, to reach 100. I'm a white American in his 40s who lives in Japan and have lived here off and on since 1994.

The vast majority of the time because of my domestic situation, if I get a number or an email from an approach I will not be following-up on it. I'm mainly doing this for social self-improvement and confidence building. Any feedback or suggestions are most welcome.

#1- I was ordering a drink at the bar in an upscale meat market club in Tokyo about two weeks ago. I noticed a young Asian girl standing next to me. I opened with "Your drink looks good, what is it?" We then talked about cocktails for a few minutes. Since she spoke American English, I asked why she was in Tokyo. She told me about her job working for an expat club in the city. From experience, I know that attractive, young, American-Asians in Japan (and Korea) usually have tons of attitude, so I was expecting a bitch shield or shit test at any moment. And sure enough, it came, "I have to go the bathroom, DON'T DRUG MY DRINK WHILE I'M GONE" (said without a smile). I couldn't think of a witty reply so I stayed silent.

She came back and we talked some more while she kept checking her I-phone. She left for a few minutes, leaving her drink on the bar, and again ordered me not to drug it while she was gone. At this time, my wing arrived and said hi to her. He asked me how I knew her and I told him that I had just met her. He told me that he had encountered her and her group out often and that they had always given him a lot of attitude when he tried to talk them up. She came back again, talked for a few minutes, then left again, again ordering us not to drug her drink. I was getting tired of it so I said, with a smirk, "Sure (her name), we're going to try to rape you." She looked a little taken aback. That's the last we talked that night. What would have been a good reply to those shit tests?

[Stun]

The first time she said it, I would've said "Already did" with a smile, and see if I could get her to believe me for awhile before making fun of her.

[Travesty]

A good idea would have been to gulp her drink down and get rid of the glass and act like you don't know what happened.

This is the type of chick you are helping blow up her ego to make her more of a monster by not cross checking her hard. I'd say hit her hard with something immediately or don't waste your time. These chicks can't receive middle ground.

"Don't flatter yourself princess/sweatheart" is what I would have used.

Depending on her reaction if bad I would have killed her drink for her and gone and talked to a different chick.

[Stun]

"Calm down, sweetie."

[kaotic]

You aren't worth the cost of the drugs.

[Carlos100]

I went out last night but I wasn't able to do any approaches. I was, however, able to practice some game and had some interesting experiences as a result. My wife went out with her Japanese women friends. I joined them at a local bar about 11:30. All her friends except one had already gone home. The friend that remained is one of her best friends, but I hadn't really interacted with her much previously. She's in her mid-30s, widowed, with three children. I'd say she is a six in the looks department.

I came in and sat down and talked to my wife and her friend for a few minutes. I used the opportunity to try to practice some game. I sat with one foot pointing away like I could get up and leave at any second. I joked around, teased and negged them in a lighthearted way, and made some sexualized comments about some friends of theirs that they thought were funny. I noticed my wife's friend eye fucking me a little bit, but I pretended not to notice. I said, "Nice talking to you two, but I need to mingle." and got up from the table.

Unfortunately, there were no other women in the bar to practice approaches on. Yes, I would have done approaches with my wife present. There were two American dudes I didn't know in the bar, so I decided to practice my conversation and "work the room" skills with them. The first guy I approached was very friendly and we had a pleasant conversation until his wife came and pulled him away to go home. The second guy was even better practice because he was fairly hostile. I think he might some mental problems. Instead of bailing, I forced myself to stay in the conversation to practice handling someone who is being contrary.

While all this was going on, I noticed that my wife's friend was watching me. My wife got up to talk to the bartender, who is a friend of ours. I decided to try an IOI test I had read about in a PUA book, I think it was Rules of the Game. I sat down next to my wife's friend and extended my hand with the palm up. She put her hand in mine. I squeezed her hand, and she squeezed back. I put her hand in my other hand and extended my other hand, she put her other hand in my hand. I then stuck my hand down her pants and gave her a cootch massage. She sat there and took it without any strong reaction. The bartender called out last call so we stood up and went to the bar. Standing next to my wife, who was still intent on her conversation, I stuck my hand down the rear of her friend's jeans and gave her the shocker. She didn't flinch. Me and my wife said goodbye to her and I acted like nothing had happened and neither did she.

Without being game aware, I don't think that would have happened because I wouldn't have noticed the IOIs she was giving me. Also, I wouldn't have had the confidence and know-how to test or push it like I did.

[jayyrod1]

I think it's great that you're taking to game while married with kids. Some people would consider that a fucked up thing to do but you're not gonna find any of them around here.

As long as your improving your self, in my opinion, you're doing the right thing.
I'll be keeping an eye out on this thread.

[Carlos100]

I attended a work party last night at a local restaurant. About 20 of my mainly Japanese coworkers were there, 14 men and six women. I went with rugged style, wearing this buttoned-up with a black t-shirt, dark skinny jeans, brown chukka boots, and a black ivy cap (that's a good jacket by the way if you lift weights as it really shows off your figure). I decided to practice being more cool and alpha by focusing on being really relaxed, slightly detached and aloof but friendly, trying to casually lead the conversation, and not fawning over the women present, as my coworkers usually do. I tried to project a strong, confident frame, as if everything was happening according to my will. It was interesting the effect that it had.

I noticed that people started following my lead and paying attention to what I was doing without me trying to catch their attention. After the dinner, it's customary for the group to split into smaller groups with each one bouncing to a different venue for after-parties. One of my male coworkers was trying to co-opt the women by inviting them to go sing karaoke. I simply stood outside the restaurant with a "I don't give a fuck" demeanor (which was not affected. I really didn't give a fuck). Someone asked me what I was doing next and I said that I was going to a new brew-pub that I had scouted out earlier. I said it with a tone that I was going and I didn't care if anyone went with me, but that they were welcome to join. I then turned and started to walk away with a couple of my coworkers who were already close friends of mine. To my surprise, the entire group followed us.

We went to the pub and everyone got really hammered. Most people had to leave to catch the train about 2230. Two of my male coworkers decided to join me at a late night cocktail/cigar bar even though it meant an expensive cab ride or long walk for one of them after the trains stopped. I felt like people were wanting to listen to what I had to say and be part of my conversation all night. It wasn't completely that way all the time with everyone, of course, but it was much more prevalent than it had been at previous office activities.

I wasn't expecting everyone to stick with me. In fact, I was kind of hoping for everyone to eventually take off so I could roam around solo and resume the 100 approach challenge. Because my co-workers were with me the entire night, I couldn't really try it, although I think that may be a little bit of a cop-out because if I had been a little more creative, I probably could have created opportunities to approach the strangers around me without my coworkers noticing.

[RawGod]

Did you notice anyone running game, good or bad? Do you think hookups are happening from time to time between your coworkers?

[Carlos100]

(05-17-2014 04:43 AM)RawGod Wrote:  

Did you notice anyone running game, good or bad? Do you think hookups are happening from time to time between your coworkers?

At the pub, one of my co-workers did some coin magic tricks for mixed groups of strangers standing around us. He had them eating out of his hand. He wasn't doing it for game purposes, he is an amateur magician who is always looking for opportunities to practice in front of people. It made me think that it might be worth learning a couple of slight-of-hand tricks.

I think a few of my male coworkers are attracted to a few of the female coworkers who were there. But, they are not game aware and kind of followed the girls around all night in that beta orbiter way of doing things. As far as I know, none of them are diddling each other.

[Carlos100]

Approach #2: I went to a community festival at a local park yesterday (Sunday). They had a stage with some bands playing. I walked around intending to do some approaches, but the vast majority of the people there were families with kids. There weren't any young women at all. A Japanese bossa nova band came on the stage and I stopped to listen to them since they were the best band yet that day. A 30-ish woman was their leader and tenor sax player so I decided to approach her after their set. She was a five in looks but she was a good sax player, so that made her more attractive.

After they finished, I waited 10-15 minutes so I wouldn't look too eager and to give them some time to unwind, then walked over to where she and her band were sitting under an awning. There were about four men in addition to her. I chatted up the whole group for a few minutes. One of the guys runs a local bar that I go to sometimes, but not that often because I really don't like it that much. The lady spoke to me in English and asked where I worked, then told me that she worked for an associate organization and that I should email her to her work email. She seemed to be implying that she wanted to talk some more, but that it wasn't a good situation to do so with her bandmates looking on. I said sure thing and left like it was no big deal.

About 15 minutes later I realized that I had already forgotten her name, so I got a piece of paper out of the rubbish bin and went back and asked her to write it down for me in English and Japanese. She did so as her bandmates looked on and wrote down her work email. I believe her bandmates were a little bemused because it was obvious I was only there to talk to her.

That approach was fairly easy because she spoke English and we had a social connection through work and through the neighborhood, although I didn't know that when I first approached. I think it would have been a little smoother and I would have looked more cool if I hadn't had to go back to get her name again. I should have been walking around with a pen and paper in my pocket so I could have written her name down immediately after walking away the first time.

[Carlos100]

I went out solo on Friday night and was able to do some approaches. I went to a festival at a park in Tokyo on Saturday.

#3 I was in a local cocktail bar having a few and smoking a cigar. Three middle-aged ladies sitting at a table were the only women in the place. When the most attractive one went to the bathroom, I timed it so I was going into the bathroom when she came out. I smiled and told her I liked the print design on her blouse and asked her where she bought it. She smiled and told me, but then kept walking back to her group before I could follow-up with more. If I had waited about 30 minutes, I probably could have approached their table and continued the conversation, but I wanted to move to greener pastures so I left.

#4 I went into a cocktail bar I had never been to before. The bartender, a late 20-something HB6/7, spoke to me in perfect English. Turns out she had lived in LA for awhile when she was young. We talked about the Japanese community in LA for a few minutes. The bar was crowded so she was busy. I could tell she was observing me so I tried to be really relaxed, slightly detached, and non-needy. I asked her for the bar's business card, told her I might use the bar for a nijikai (after-party) for a work function (which is true) then asked her name which I wrote on the card. She didn't offer her last name even though I gently pressed her for it. I said thank you, paid, and left. This is going to be a work in progress. I will probably stop off at the bar for a drink or two every time I go out in that area, not only because I'm trying to game her, but because I sincerely liked the bar. I will likely try to go there with friends, male or female, whenever possible because I've found that social proofing or preselection works well with women bartenders or bar staff.

#5 Went into a wine bar that I've been to before. There was a a cute girl working the counter who I hadn't see before. I chatted her up and found out she was getting off work soon. I asked her to have a drink with me somewhere else before she went home but she said she had to get up at 5 a.m. She gave me her "Line" ID. I don't have an I-phone so I'm not sure how to contact her. No big deal. If I go back to that bar again I will talk to her some more.

#6 Same bar, a group of three, two women and a man, came in and sat at the bar. I immediately started talking to the one sitting nearest me, who wasn't "with" the guy, then moved over into the seat next to her. By this time I was getting a little inebriated so I don't remember how I opened her or what we talked about. I made it clear from the get go, however, why I was talking to her and we were holding hands within 30-45 minutes. I tried push-pull by throwing her hand away, then taking it again after she said something pleasant. I tried to isolate by asking her to go to a different bar with me, but she wouldn't leave her friends. She gave me her Facebook name and I will message her there later if I can decipher her handwriting. I will not FRIEND her as I know better than that. I just use it to message girls that I meet since I can't use my cell for texting (my wife checks it).

#7 Went to a "Caribbean" festival at a park in Tokyo. I was with my wife and kids so I couldn't do approaching. When they were occupied at one of the booths, I went to buy a drink and the girl tout working at a booth said something to me in accented English so I could tell she spoke Spanish. I replied to her in Spanish and her face lit up. I went by and bought drinks from that booth a few more times and joked around with her in Spanish each time. She was a light-skinned Columbian. On one occasion she insisted on making the drink for me instead of one of the dudes working in the booth. The last time I went by I gave her a piece of paper and a pen and asked for her data and she wrote down her phone # and email address. I might actually try to follow up with this one because it turns out that she lives in a Tokyo suburb in the general area where I live.

It was a fairly good weekend for getting some approaches in, but I'm a little disappointed that I didn't try very hard to push my comfort zone. I didn't make any cold approaches on the street or in a coffee shop. Talking to girls in a bar or who are working at the establishment I'm patronizing is fairly easy. I need to push my comfort zone by approaching a stranger girl in a more sterile environment.

[Carlos100]

#8: Was at a hotel pool on the weekend reading a book. A very attractive Asian woman sat down near me while her kid was playing in the pool. I smiled and told her, "I'm going to the snackbar to get something to drink, would you like something?" She declined. When I returned I asked her if it was her first time there and made general conversation for about 30 minutes until her kid said she was bored and ready to go back to the room. She and her husband and kids were visiting Tokyo from the US. I did not try to obtain any personal contact information from her since I didn't plan on following up on this one. I just wanted to practice approaching someone in that kind of situation instead of sitting there in silence like I often did before.

[Carlos100]

I went out last night, but didn't make any new approaches. I did, however, have a new experience with frame control. Here's how it happened:

I went to a local bar. They had a live band and it was well attended. I looked around to see if there was anyone I knew. I spotted a Japanese girl who I used to work with. I had always thought of her as a sincere, goody-two-shoes. She got married about a year ago. I was surprised to see her out with a girlfriend, both dressed in flashy clothes. A dude I'm distantly acquainted with from the local area and who has some reputation as a player and another guy were talking to her and her friend. The dude was obviously gaming her and she appeared to be really enjoying it. I was shocked at seeing this as I had never expected it (but I know I should have known better). From a game perspective, it was instructive to watch because the dude clearly had tight game. He was telling them funny, interactive stories, and the two girls were eating it up. His buddy, on the other hand, had no game at all. He was laughing too loudly and too often, smiling too much, leaning into them, and saying stupid, obvious things. The reactions from the girls to him and the other dude clearly communicated who they thought was more compelling. What was interesting is that the smooth guy has a badly acne-scarred face, but the girls clearly liked him better. I was even more shocked when he left a little later with both girls.

Seeing something like that that I wasn't expecting broke my frame. Obviously, I think I probably was attracted to that girl more than I thought. So, seeing her apparently successfully gamed by another dude seemed to bother me. After they left, I felt insecure, lost, and awkward. I could tell that I had lost frame because the body language of the people around me in the bar showed that they thought I was of no consequence. I knew that I needed to get frame back immediately.

I put my drink down and went to the bathroom which, fortunately, was empty. I reminded myself that it doesn't matter to me what any individual girl does. I'm above that. I stared in the mirror and did some self-affirmations. I had read this post a few days ago, so, while looking in the mirror, I willed a sparkle into my eye, put on a smirk and held it there, then walked out of the bathroom with a swagger like there was a rope tied to my dick pulling me along. I did a strutting circuit of the bar smirking at everyone and looking at everyone in the eye. It worked. I noticed that people were now watching me and checking themselves as I walked by. I had the dominant frame back.

A little later two women from one of my social groups came into the bar. I sat with them at their table. One of them was being a little combative in her interaction with me. I cooly agreed and amplified, light-heartedly negged her, or simply smirked at her when she said something of a trollish nature. I could tell her friend was impressed, as she started eye-fucking me and laughing at everything I said. I later isolated her by the bathrooms and kissed her and she eagerly responded. Then, I acted like it was no big deal. I'm fairly certain I can bang her, but I haven't decided yet if I will due to social considerations that I won't go into here.

The point is, I had reestablished frame and used it to control interactions so that they were to my advantage instead of letting other people and events overly influence my mood and attitude. It was a good experience.

By the way, the band in the bar was jet-engine loud. Per Roosh' recommendation, I was using these earplugs and they really worked. They muted the music but I could hear what people were saying to me. Because the stems are clear, people couldn't see that I had earplugs in my ears. I recommend them if you go to bars or clubs with loud music.

[Carlos100]

I might have a problem. I'm going out this weekend, so I messaged about 10 women from my various social circles asking if they wanted to join me. I messaged that many because, in my experience, only about 10% usually end up responding that they are available. To my surprise, two (who don't know each other) responded that they would like to join me. That's not the problem. I plan on having them both come out, then acting like both are my friends and be aloof and DMV to try to get them to compete against each other for me.

My actual problem is that I think my wife is going to try to tag along. I told her that I was meeting two male coworkers at the train station. She hinted yesterday that she was going to drop the kids off at her Mom's. I think she is going to tell me, "I'm going to go with you when you meet your coworkers, then I will peel off and go shopping and leave you guys to your business." The obvious problem here is, I'm not meeting who she thinks I'm meeting. What do I tell her to put her off?

[Carlos100]

#9 I had 15 minutes to kill before an appointment today, so went into a coffee shop. Sat down with my coffee at a big table across from a really cute J-girl. I noticed she was studying English. I caught her eye and asked her in Japanese if she was studying English. She smiled and said yes, then started talking to her friend next to her. I got out a pen and piece of paper and wrote my name and email (I don't give out my cell # for reasons that should be evident above. I know it cockblocks me but that's fine.) Right before getting up to leave, I asked her her name, then told her mine and told her to email me if she would like to practice her English. She smiled and said thank-you and I was outta there.

I know that's weak game. I should have broken into their conversation and tried to establish more rapport in the few minutes time I had and tried to get her contact info. At least I did something. Before, I wouldn't have done anything.

[Carlos100]

Re #4. I was with a girl from social circle last night and took her to the bar where I had done approach #4 (no bang with the girl but got a make out which means she probably has buyer's remorse now). After she went home I went back to the bar. Sure enough, when I went back the bartender was practically shoving her phone number at me. Preselection really seems to work with women bartenders in Japan.

[Skotch]

Great thread. Keep it up.

[Carlos100]

I'm busy with family stuff this entire weekend so I will go into a detail on my date last weekend that I referenced above. The girl is from distant social circle. I got to know her about four years ago and friended her on Facebook, which is fine because both of us only use it for messaging people, not for posting crap on our walls. So, I don't think it was a beta move to friend her in this case. I hardly ever see her, so over the past few years I would stay in touch by dropping her a "happy new year" or some such message each year, but otherwise leaving her alone. After feeling more confident in my game skills lately, I finally directly asked her out, using "Hey, are you looking for something to do this Saturday? I'm going out." She enthusiastically responded, which surprised me somewhat since we really hadn't talked much previously, but I think the air of mystery probably had something to do with it. She's never married, Japanese, and about a HB7 in looks and 35 years old, which is normal for my social circle because of my age. She knows I'm married with kids and my wife is Japanese, so, unlike in the US, she probably had no conscious intention of escalating romantically with me. She was just looking to pass the time with someone she finds mildly interesting. Thus, I needed to use tight game.

Before the meeting time I went to the area and scoped out the logistics. After meeting her (6 pm) I complimented her on her shoes (I always do this) and took her to a standing bar. A standing bar is a kind of bar in Japan with no chairs. Everyone stands at the counter. It's actually a good first venue to take a date because you can stand right next to each other, plus it's cheaper than other bars. We drank three beers over about an hour and a half and talked. I didn't try to escalate kino here except for gradually standing closer to her. I just tried to keep a detached but warm, relaxed vibe and have a nice conversation. I told her we would walk to another bar. When we left I stuck my elbow firmly but gently into her side, and she placed her hand inside my arm for the duration (10 min) of the walk.

The next bar was the cocktail bar where I had done approach #4. It's a good bar because the bar stools have seat backs that allowed me to rest my arm behind her back. One bad thing about the bar is that it has TV sets behind the bar which I noticed distracted her from me a bit because she would sometimes look at the tv. In fact, on one occasion I teased her and told her to stop watching tv and she laughed and stopped watching. Our conversation deepened here into more emotional things, like what we wanted out of life and that sort of thing. I escalated the kino here by reading her palm, checking out the skin on her arms, telling her she had something on her eye/lip and rubbing it away, etc. We did one shot of tequila and I used the "love shot" thing I learned in Korea where you intertwine your arms when doing the shot. I've found that women always get a kick out of it. After an hour and a half here, we bounced. This time I took her hand when leaving the bar.

On the 10 minute walk to the next bar I used a technique that I read on this forum. I pointed ahead and said, "when we get over there I'm going to kiss you". She laughed and went along with it. I had chosen the third bar because it's a sofa bar which allowed me to escalate the kino even further before trying to bounce her to a nearby love hotel, which was about 10 minutes walk away. Within 10 minutes of sitting on the sofa, we were making out.

Unfortunately, however, she suddenly said she felt sick and needed to go home. I probed a little to make sure she sincerely felt that way, then walked her to the train station. I did not offer to ride to her station with her to make sure she got home ok. I don't think that would have necessarily impressed her. Instead, I stayed out and got on with my night and didn't engage in any emotional recrimination because the date had so abruptly terminated. I messaged her the next day and she said she got home fine but that she had not felt very good. I haven't tried to communicate with her since because I think it's better to try to keep an air of mystery until the next time I ask her out again, likely in a few months. I think there is a good chance that she has some buyer's remorse because we made out and the final bar. We'll see.

I think the good things about the date were my logistics were solid, I escalated kino appropriately, and my conversation skills at establishing rapport were good. I forgot to use some of the techniques I wanted to try like compliance testing and cat-string. But, I'm not sure that they would have helped that much because the date was going so well anyway. I successfully removed my emotions from the outcome and enjoyed the process. Because of that, I wasn't upset when she suddenly said she needed to go home and so I hope she noticed that I didn't look needy or supplicating. I probably escalated a little too much at the third bar by going for the make out.

The big negative with the date was her suddenly getting sick. The problem is that we both skipped dinner and drank fairly heavily for three solid hours with only short breaks between bars. So, we were on empty stomachs. We had started with beer and then gradually switched to harder and harder alcohol. I have found the phrase "beer before liquor, never sicker" to be true. I should have guided her drinking choices with this in mind to keep her from getting sick. I think she genuinely was sick, not pretending. At the third bar I had planned to say, "why don't we take a break from drinking for a little while and go give each other a foot message", then take her to the love hotel. I have no idea if it would have worked or not because she got sick right before I was going to ask it.

If I get any further dates with others in the future, I think I will use the same logistics because it worked really well. But, I will plan on taking it easier on the firewater.

[Carlos100]

OK, I went out last night, but I had to go with the wife. It's our "anniversary." As you all know, women use anniversaries, birthdays, and Valentine's Day as control mechanisms for the female imperative. My wife is no different. At least, this time I told her I would be choosing the venues. I chose a brew pub then a cocktail bar so I could smoke a cigar. She followed along.

I was able to practice holding frame. I imagined her as an 8-year-old, which made it much easier to deal with her bitching and complaining all night long. I just stayed completely relaxed in my chair, smirked, and agreed and amplified, ALL NIGHT. By doing so I was able to get through the night with a moderately entertaining experience, instead of getting sucked into her indignation drama frame, as has happened in the past. Ironically, game has probably made my marriage stronger.

At the brew pub, I was able to observe some dudes' game, or lack thereof. There was a very westernized Japanese girl in the bar waiting for a friend. She spoke perfect English with a slight British accent. Two English teachers, an American and an Australian (I think, based on his accent), were talking to her. The American looked a lot like Neil Strauss, with a bald head and goatee. The Australian had better game. He was better able to draw her into his frame. He would ask her something, comment on her answer, then ignore her and talk to his buddies for a few minutes. The American dude was more supplicating. He would interrogate her and compliment her answers. He bought her a drink. When the two dudes left, they all exchanged numbers, but she seemed to be giving more IOIs to the Australian guy. I could be wrong, of course, because, speaking from experience, weak game can still get you laid in Japan. My wife (who is Japanese) was watching too. I told her that I would have asked the girl about her eyelash extensions ("matsuge no extension" in Japanese). My wife was like, "You can't talk to girls that way!" Me: "Sure you can. Especially when they have a slightly bitchy attitude like hers." Her: "Girls don't like guys who talk like that." Me: [smirk]

Anyway, after putting up with my wife's bitching for awhile, we were at the cocktail bar and she happened to mention some girl power thing so I decided to educate her a little on Red Pill philosophy. By way of a series of questions, I informed her that the reason men ruled the world was because our testosterone gave us greater strength, stamina, will power, and risk-taking ability. I used an example she could relate to of construction sites in Japan in which one can see lots of 40-60 year-old dudes hard at work. She reluctantly agreed. Then, I told her, that in spite of all that men were still disposable. Her eyes lit up and she agreed. Then I explained that men were disposable because one man can impregnate an almost infinite number of women throughout his life, while women were not disposable because they are only fertile for a short amount of time, from age 16-35, and after that really not useful for propagating the tribe. Because of that, women in that age group are valuable and somewhat irreplaceable, but afterwards not really. My wife is 40. She asked me why I was being so mean. I said, "Do you disagree with anything I just said?" Her: "No, but that doesn't mean that you need to talk about it." I smirked, took a drag on my cigar, and changed the subject and she was a lot more agreeable the rest of the night.

Good practice on frame control and dread game.

[Carlos100]

#10 and #11:

I went to a jazz performance on Saturday afternoon at a local live house café, the same band from approach #2. I was hoping it would provide an opportunity to meet some new people. Most of the crowd was middle-aged. Friendly people, but not good for approaches. I was sitting alone at the bar and noticed an older lady sitting by herself at a table. When she came by the bar to get a drink, I said hello and talked with her for a few minutes. After she went and sat back down I walked over and asked if I could sit with her since both of us were there alone. She said it was fine. So, I sat down and we watched the performance together. We talked a little but I didn't try to get any personal contact information from her.

Afterwards, since I had never been to that area before I explored around the local train station. I was dressed-up a little bit and I practiced my alpha strut, based on some threads from this forum on body language. I focused on pretending I was hanging by a string and that I was being pulled along by a rope tied to my crotch. I also wore a smirk. I noticed a couple of girls checking me out when they walked by, including one who even smirked back at me, which is unusual in Japan. I'm embarrassed to say, however, that I didn't stop them and ask where the effen pet store was.

Later that night I was bar hopping back in my local neighborhood. I was pissed that I had missed the earlier opportunities to approach those girls, so I just stopped two random 20-something girls who were walking together and asked them in Japanese where the local pet store was. They were very helpful. They even pulled out their I-phone and searched. I talked to them about random local stuff for about 10 minutes, then told them I was going to get a coffee and asked them if they would like to come. They declined. I didn't try to get personal contact information because I didn't feel a deep enough rapport had been established. But, at least I got my first street, pet store approach done. It was much easier and relaxed than I expected.

[iamdegaussed]

A lot of fun to read, man. Some of these situations you handled real well. Sounds like the date went great until she got sick.

Also the 'I'm going to kiss you right there' line is Krauser's I believe.

[Carlos100]

(07-14-2014 12:09 AM)iamdegaussed Wrote:  

A lot of fun to read, man. Some of these situations you handled real well. Sounds like the date went great until she got sick.

Also the 'I'm going to kiss you right there' line is Krauser's I believe.

It's a great line and it seems to work really well if the girl is giving you any IOIs at all. It's going to be my go-to in the future. I will even use it if I'm out with two girls.

An update on earlier approaches: #4 was texting me a lot, but after I revealed that I was married, she stopped actively pursuing me. It happens all the time and it's no big deal. I will still use her bar for taking dates to because since she's my friend, it gives me social proof when I bring people there and the bar is a good 2nd venue for dates.

I still talk to #5 whenever I go to her bar, which is about every two weeks. I actually like her boss, the bar "mama-san," better, so I've been hitting on her harder even though the younger girl is probably more available. It's a delicate balancing act because they may be only feigning interest to get my business at the bar, so it's a challenge to maintain my frame with them.

I messaged #6 twice via Facebook but she didn't answer. So, I nexted her.

I emailed #7 twice but she didn't answer. I called her once and she acted irritated and cranky, so she's also nexted.

[Carlos100]

#12 I was in a different part of Tokyo than I usually go to with a coworker today. We stopped off in a restaurant for lunch after our morning business was completed. Sitting next to us were two women office workers, a HB8 and a HB6. I asked them where the train station was (I really didn't know for sure). After they told me, I asked if they worked in the local area. They said yes then gave us the cold shoulder for about five minutes, then paid their bill and left. I think I should have tried dropping some bait when I asked about their work, such as, "Oh, this is our first time in this part of the city. We're here today because of..." then see if they took the bait and asked a follow-up question.

[Carlos100]

I just spent the last two weeks shepherding my kids around a family vacation, so I didn't get any approaches done (although I probably could have if I had tried harder, but the logistics are kind of difficult in that situation). But, I did try to practice as much game as I could. I dressed slightly better than the people around me, such as wearing a flat cap instead of a baseball cap, better fitting clothes, polos and madras button-ups instead of t-shirts, Sanuk sandles instead of flip-flops, etc. I also focused on walking with a slight swagger, head-up, and with a constant smirk on my face, a sparkle in my eye, and projecting an air of relaxed confidence. I was careful not to eat too much so as not to gain weight like many people do on vacations.

I'm telling you, that stuff works. I got loads of looks from women passing-by in the street, mall, or other situations. Some even smirked or smiled back at me. I'm fairly certain a flight attendant on the return flight was giving me some IOIs, just from what I've learned from studying game and from having flown quite a bit.

Smirking appears to be better than smiling because it is less direct and projects a less needy and supplicating attitude. It allows women to check you out or respond in a more subtle manner, which helps lower their defenses. With men, it projects a little more strength, so they give you a little more respect.