Quote: (12-15-2018 02:38 AM)Australia Sucks Wrote:
Neo, given that some time has now passed, do you feel the benefits of the mediation/retreat were lasting or just temporary?
Good question. I'd say there are some changes that have become ingrained.
At the end of the retreat they recommend that you practice 2 hours a day, 1 hour in the morning, and one in the evening. I haven't been able to keep up this schedule, although I wish I had. My practice these days is a bit sporadic although I've still put in many many hours.
Anyway to answer what has been lasting.
1) Focus. Its not as intense as when I wrote that post which was right after the retreat, but I 'get in the zone' much much faster these days. I can focus on tasks for long periods of time.
2) Emotional control. Before I went on that retreat I was literally flying off the handle. I mean some intense heated arguments with people. I am much more calm and aware of my state. Now I still I get angry, annoyed, and feel all the emotions of course. It's not like you become a robot and immune, but your capacity to use wisdom and remain cool under pressure skyrockets.
The other things I listed have remained as well but to a lesser degree. Like I said I have been meditating just not as intensely.
So what have I lost, what was temporary, negative effects?
1) The time dilation effect seems to be dependent on how much I meditate, but it's not as pronounced as when I wrote that post. If I did 10 hours a day again I think it would return.
2) I still have to work out some past issues. The retreat helped greatly, but I don't think they are completely resolved. Not disappointed about this in the least, as it's a long process.
3) The mindset you gain is somewhat incompatible with the modern world. You have to mix things up.
Let me explain. When you meditate you gain the understanding that you can generate happiness that is not dependent on external conditions. This is a great realization. I mean I was living like a monk and I was content.
However, I'm in a competitive industry/job/company/sport/hobbies and I need to keep my motivation and energy high to get things done. When I'm really pushing myself the thought comes in my mind of why am I pushing myself? I know in the end it won't make me happy.
You have to balance this out or you will lose motivation. I found a solution but just listing out the Whys on paper and changing my self-talk. Also just enjoying the present moment. The work and challenge in the present IS the satisfaction.
(Read the book Self Discipline in 10 Days)
4) Another slight negative is that while I became more empathetic towards others it became more difficult to connect with certain people. When you see crazy behavior you tend to wonder how is someone acting that way? I mean YOU have the knowledge that it's all impermanent. I just remind myself that everyone is at a different stage.
Anyway let me know if anyone has other questions and Merry Christmas to the forum. I'm not on too much these days but anything I can do to give back to this place.