Quote: (01-07-2015 12:37 AM)Vacancier Permanent Wrote:
Does anyone have a link to watch this film online?
http://www.putlocker.tw/watch-divorce-co...-2014.html
Quote: (01-07-2015 12:37 AM)Vacancier Permanent Wrote:
Does anyone have a link to watch this film online?
Quote: (01-07-2015 07:15 PM)Isaac Jordan Wrote:
[quote='Vacancier Permanent' pid='924450' dateline='1420609042']
Does anyone have a link to watch this film online?
Quote: (10-05-2015 07:26 PM)emuelle1 Wrote:
Until he found more than $20,000 worth of hours to charge for. And it kept dragging out. It wasn't until I ran out of money and maxed out my credit cards and told him if he charges another dollar, he is going to have to rewrite the agreement to state that she has to find a way to pay for it that he offered to do it pro bono and all of a sudden the work got done, the case scheduled, and the divorce granted.
And some of the charges were ridiculous. He charged me over $1000 for supposedly calling my retirement, but there was no evidence he did anything for it. He didn't offer anything for how to handle it. I had to do all that work.
Quote: (10-06-2015 06:14 PM)Sexus Wrote:
I have this vid on my netflix radar. Perhaps I will watch it tonight and report back if anything significant to tell crops up. I went through a couple of family court conflagrations from 2001-2011. Tales are one thing, wisdom is another.
Quote: (10-06-2015 05:39 PM)whateverfuckit Wrote:
Quote: (10-05-2015 07:26 PM)emuelle1 Wrote:
Until he found more than $20,000 worth of hours to charge for. And it kept dragging out. It wasn't until I ran out of money and maxed out my credit cards and told him if he charges another dollar, he is going to have to rewrite the agreement to state that she has to find a way to pay for it that he offered to do it pro bono and all of a sudden the work got done, the case scheduled, and the divorce granted.
And some of the charges were ridiculous. He charged me over $1000 for supposedly calling my retirement, but there was no evidence he did anything for it. He didn't offer anything for how to handle it. I had to do all that work.
Thats exactly what the film goes over. Basically, divorce lawyers convince a woman that she can get more money by drawing the divorce out. The thing is, jokes on her, because the lawyer keeps billing until the assets hit $0. It's VERY cut-throat. Even the most "red-pill" views will find themselves shocked at how deep and dirty this is, right down to our Judicial sector. There was a gay guy who was openly into BDSM who was appointed BY A JUDGE as the person to determine which parent was most fit to take care of a child. He was on the film, and admitted openly that the system was corrupt.
Quote: (10-07-2015 06:50 PM)Merenguero Wrote:
I don't even know where to start with some of the comments here. There have been some really off-base comments regarding family law here lately. Criminal cases need to be tried. First thing tomorrow morning, I start the biggest criminal trial of my career. Family law cases need to be worked out. Anybody who doesn't make any and all efforts to work cases out is incredibly stupid and it's no wonder that they often get results in their cases that they don't like. The way it's done (the real way it's done is to either avoid getting married or if you must get married to make sure to marry someone with whom your chances of getting divorced are minimal) is to have a civil discussion with the person from whom you are getting divorced and to enter into a full agreement regarding custody, child support, and property (if there is any. There usually isn't). If everything is worked out, both sides should hire attorneys to put everything in writing. The same attorney can't be used to represent both sides. It is a direct conflict of interest. Once the agreement is put in writing, you may then be able to proceed on an uncontested divorce.
If someone is too stupid to proceed that way, you must hire a competent lawyer to litigate a divorce case. Many, many cases start out contested, but are then worked out. You have to find a lawyer who is neither scared nor unable to try cases, in case the case goes to trial. Do your research. Find out who answers and/or returns phone calls. Find out who will meet with you at any time. Find out who can handle himself on his feet. Find out who doesn't overbill people. How do you find out who overbills? Check out who has been disciplined by the state licensing authority. Why do you think some lawyers have ethics problems? Who do you think files the bar complaints? This is the kind of stuff your friends who get "divorce raped" and "taken for a ride" by lawyers probably don't tell you and even more likely, don't know. Ethics problems happen because clients are pissed off about being ripped off. Plain and simple. They think they were overcharged and were quite possibly sued by lawyers and file these complaints in retaliation. If the ethics commission (the name of the agency varies from state to state) sees a particular lawyers name enough times, they will very likely start to take some action against him. They will also likely uncover other ethics violations when they are investigating the one about the person who felt ripped off. Ask people you trust if the lawyer who represented them in their divorce charged a reasonable fee or ripped them off. If you don't do your due diligence, you have no one to blame but yourself. I will say this. I've been doing this for a while and have never even seen a bar complaint. I don't even know what one looks like. Why not? Because I answer the phone, promptly return phone calls when I can't answer the phone, and never make people feel like they are being ripped off.
Quote: (10-07-2015 07:02 PM)emuelle1 Wrote:
Quote: (10-07-2015 06:50 PM)Merenguero Wrote:
I don't even know where to start with some of the comments here. There have been some really off-base comments regarding family law here lately. Criminal cases need to be tried. First thing tomorrow morning, I start the biggest criminal trial of my career. Family law cases need to be worked out. Anybody who doesn't make any and all efforts to work cases out is incredibly stupid and it's no wonder that they often get results in their cases that they don't like. The way it's done (the real way it's done is to either avoid getting married or if you must get married to make sure to marry someone with whom your chances of getting divorced are minimal) is to have a civil discussion with the person from whom you are getting divorced and to enter into a full agreement regarding custody, child support, and property (if there is any. There usually isn't). If everything is worked out, both sides should hire attorneys to put everything in writing. The same attorney can't be used to represent both sides. It is a direct conflict of interest. Once the agreement is put in writing, you may then be able to proceed on an uncontested divorce.
If someone is too stupid to proceed that way, you must hire a competent lawyer to litigate a divorce case. Many, many cases start out contested, but are then worked out. You have to find a lawyer who is neither scared nor unable to try cases, in case the case goes to trial. Do your research. Find out who answers and/or returns phone calls. Find out who will meet with you at any time. Find out who can handle himself on his feet. Find out who doesn't overbill people. How do you find out who overbills? Check out who has been disciplined by the state licensing authority. Why do you think some lawyers have ethics problems? Who do you think files the bar complaints? This is the kind of stuff your friends who get "divorce raped" and "taken for a ride" by lawyers probably don't tell you and even more likely, don't know. Ethics problems happen because clients are pissed off about being ripped off. Plain and simple. They think they were overcharged and were quite possibly sued by lawyers and file these complaints in retaliation. If the ethics commission (the name of the agency varies from state to state) sees a particular lawyers name enough times, they will very likely start to take some action against him. They will also likely uncover other ethics violations when they are investigating the one about the person who felt ripped off. Ask people you trust if the lawyer who represented them in their divorce charged a reasonable fee or ripped them off. If you don't do your due diligence, you have no one to blame but yourself. I will say this. I've been doing this for a while and have never even seen a bar complaint. I don't even know what one looks like. Why not? Because I answer the phone, promptly return phone calls when I can't answer the phone, and never make people feel like they are being ripped off.
That's all well and good on paper. But when you're in the middle of it, suffering through the emotional hell and stress of it all, and of course trying to keep up with your own full time job with some bitch (who at the time you married her seemed unlikely to divorce you- it's not like they come with a label on their foreheads) demanding for the fastest possible divorce, who has the bandwidth to research, call lawyers, etc? It's not like your profession makes it easy for the rest of us. And a divorce is NOT a criminal issue, so I'm not even sure why that category got crossed in with the rest of your post.
Sure, all things being equal, we probably should spend fucking weeks contacting and interviewing lawyers, talking to friends, networking, and all that. But seriously, in real life, it doesn't work that way and most of us are out of our depths at the time. And every single lawyer promises to do it easy and cheap. The "divorce mediator" my ex chose said the same thing. Easy and cheap. Then months and $20,000 later, I found out it was neither, except compared to the $50,000-$60,000 bill he claimed bringing two lawyers into the equation would cost. Sure, it was relatively cheap and easy compared to that.
And our friends are all full of shit. None of my friends who had been through a divorce were ANY FUCKING USE to me when it came to advice. No matter how well intentioned.
Quote: (10-07-2015 07:12 PM)Merenguero Wrote:
Quote: (10-07-2015 07:02 PM)emuelle1 Wrote:
Quote: (10-07-2015 06:50 PM)Merenguero Wrote:
I don't even know where to start with some of the comments here. There have been some really off-base comments regarding family law here lately. Criminal cases need to be tried. First thing tomorrow morning, I start the biggest criminal trial of my career. Family law cases need to be worked out. Anybody who doesn't make any and all efforts to work cases out is incredibly stupid and it's no wonder that they often get results in their cases that they don't like. The way it's done (the real way it's done is to either avoid getting married or if you must get married to make sure to marry someone with whom your chances of getting divorced are minimal) is to have a civil discussion with the person from whom you are getting divorced and to enter into a full agreement regarding custody, child support, and property (if there is any. There usually isn't). If everything is worked out, both sides should hire attorneys to put everything in writing. The same attorney can't be used to represent both sides. It is a direct conflict of interest. Once the agreement is put in writing, you may then be able to proceed on an uncontested divorce.
If someone is too stupid to proceed that way, you must hire a competent lawyer to litigate a divorce case. Many, many cases start out contested, but are then worked out. You have to find a lawyer who is neither scared nor unable to try cases, in case the case goes to trial. Do your research. Find out who answers and/or returns phone calls. Find out who will meet with you at any time. Find out who can handle himself on his feet. Find out who doesn't overbill people. How do you find out who overbills? Check out who has been disciplined by the state licensing authority. Why do you think some lawyers have ethics problems? Who do you think files the bar complaints? This is the kind of stuff your friends who get "divorce raped" and "taken for a ride" by lawyers probably don't tell you and even more likely, don't know. Ethics problems happen because clients are pissed off about being ripped off. Plain and simple. They think they were overcharged and were quite possibly sued by lawyers and file these complaints in retaliation. If the ethics commission (the name of the agency varies from state to state) sees a particular lawyers name enough times, they will very likely start to take some action against him. They will also likely uncover other ethics violations when they are investigating the one about the person who felt ripped off. Ask people you trust if the lawyer who represented them in their divorce charged a reasonable fee or ripped them off. If you don't do your due diligence, you have no one to blame but yourself. I will say this. I've been doing this for a while and have never even seen a bar complaint. I don't even know what one looks like. Why not? Because I answer the phone, promptly return phone calls when I can't answer the phone, and never make people feel like they are being ripped off.
That's all well and good on paper. But when you're in the middle of it, suffering through the emotional hell and stress of it all, and of course trying to keep up with your own full time job with some bitch (who at the time you married her seemed unlikely to divorce you- it's not like they come with a label on their foreheads) demanding for the fastest possible divorce, who has the bandwidth to research, call lawyers, etc? It's not like your profession makes it easy for the rest of us. And a divorce is NOT a criminal issue, so I'm not even sure why that category got crossed in with the rest of your post.
Sure, all things being equal, we probably should spend fucking weeks contacting and interviewing lawyers, talking to friends, networking, and all that. But seriously, in real life, it doesn't work that way and most of us are out of our depths at the time. And every single lawyer promises to do it easy and cheap. The "divorce mediator" my ex chose said the same thing. Easy and cheap. Then months and $20,000 later, I found out it was neither, except compared to the $50,000-$60,000 bill he claimed bringing two lawyers into the equation would cost. Sure, it was relatively cheap and easy compared to that.
And our friends are all full of shit. None of my friends who had been through a divorce were ANY FUCKING USE to me when it came to advice. No matter how well intentioned.
I'm pretty sure I know how things work "in real life." I've handled hundreds of divorces over the years. The only reason why I haven't handled more was that I've been concentrating more on criminal law for the last seven and a half years. I'll answer your rant with some questions. Did you check to see which lawyers had sued their clients and how often? That doesn't take "fucking weeks" to do. It may take an hour. That information should be online and should be accessible to the public. Did you search the website of the ethics department of the bar of the state where you live? That should take five minutes. When you called a lawyer, did a lawyer, not a secretary or paralegal, get on the phone and/or immediately return your call? A phone call takes a few minutes. Did you ask the lawyers you talked to for their cell numbers? Did they give you their cell numbers? Did you try to get a flat fee from any of them or did they say they would bill by the hour or were unable to give you an estimate as to how much they would charge? Did you go online to see if people were happy or pissed off (that's no holy grail, because often the lawyer himself and/or his family and friends post the positive reviews)? If you see any negative reviews, stay the hell away.
Divorce rape trolls. A new breed which has been all over the place lately.
Edit: I'm well aware that criminal cases are not divorce cases. I mentioned criminal cases, which need to be tried, in order to distinguish them from divorce cases, which need to be worked out.
Quote: (10-07-2015 07:56 PM)emuelle1 Wrote:
Quote: (10-07-2015 07:12 PM)Merenguero Wrote:
Quote: (10-07-2015 07:02 PM)emuelle1 Wrote:
Quote: (10-07-2015 06:50 PM)Merenguero Wrote:
I don't even know where to start with some of the comments here. There have been some really off-base comments regarding family law here lately. Criminal cases need to be tried. First thing tomorrow morning, I start the biggest criminal trial of my career. Family law cases need to be worked out. Anybody who doesn't make any and all efforts to work cases out is incredibly stupid and it's no wonder that they often get results in their cases that they don't like. The way it's done (the real way it's done is to either avoid getting married or if you must get married to make sure to marry someone with whom your chances of getting divorced are minimal) is to have a civil discussion with the person from whom you are getting divorced and to enter into a full agreement regarding custody, child support, and property (if there is any. There usually isn't). If everything is worked out, both sides should hire attorneys to put everything in writing. The same attorney can't be used to represent both sides. It is a direct conflict of interest. Once the agreement is put in writing, you may then be able to proceed on an uncontested divorce.
If someone is too stupid to proceed that way, you must hire a competent lawyer to litigate a divorce case. Many, many cases start out contested, but are then worked out. You have to find a lawyer who is neither scared nor unable to try cases, in case the case goes to trial. Do your research. Find out who answers and/or returns phone calls. Find out who will meet with you at any time. Find out who can handle himself on his feet. Find out who doesn't overbill people. How do you find out who overbills? Check out who has been disciplined by the state licensing authority. Why do you think some lawyers have ethics problems? Who do you think files the bar complaints? This is the kind of stuff your friends who get "divorce raped" and "taken for a ride" by lawyers probably don't tell you and even more likely, don't know. Ethics problems happen because clients are pissed off about being ripped off. Plain and simple. They think they were overcharged and were quite possibly sued by lawyers and file these complaints in retaliation. If the ethics commission (the name of the agency varies from state to state) sees a particular lawyers name enough times, they will very likely start to take some action against him. They will also likely uncover other ethics violations when they are investigating the one about the person who felt ripped off. Ask people you trust if the lawyer who represented them in their divorce charged a reasonable fee or ripped them off. If you don't do your due diligence, you have no one to blame but yourself. I will say this. I've been doing this for a while and have never even seen a bar complaint. I don't even know what one looks like. Why not? Because I answer the phone, promptly return phone calls when I can't answer the phone, and never make people feel like they are being ripped off.
That's all well and good on paper. But when you're in the middle of it, suffering through the emotional hell and stress of it all, and of course trying to keep up with your own full time job with some bitch (who at the time you married her seemed unlikely to divorce you- it's not like they come with a label on their foreheads) demanding for the fastest possible divorce, who has the bandwidth to research, call lawyers, etc? It's not like your profession makes it easy for the rest of us. And a divorce is NOT a criminal issue, so I'm not even sure why that category got crossed in with the rest of your post.
Sure, all things being equal, we probably should spend fucking weeks contacting and interviewing lawyers, talking to friends, networking, and all that. But seriously, in real life, it doesn't work that way and most of us are out of our depths at the time. And every single lawyer promises to do it easy and cheap. The "divorce mediator" my ex chose said the same thing. Easy and cheap. Then months and $20,000 later, I found out it was neither, except compared to the $50,000-$60,000 bill he claimed bringing two lawyers into the equation would cost. Sure, it was relatively cheap and easy compared to that.
And our friends are all full of shit. None of my friends who had been through a divorce were ANY FUCKING USE to me when it came to advice. No matter how well intentioned.
I'm pretty sure I know how things work "in real life." I've handled hundreds of divorces over the years. The only reason why I haven't handled more was that I've been concentrating more on criminal law for the last seven and a half years. I'll answer your rant with some questions. Did you check to see which lawyers had sued their clients and how often? That doesn't take "fucking weeks" to do. It may take an hour. That information should be online and should be accessible to the public. Did you search the website of the ethics department of the bar of the state where you live? That should take five minutes. When you called a lawyer, did a lawyer, not a secretary or paralegal, get on the phone and/or immediately return your call? A phone call takes a few minutes. Did you ask the lawyers you talked to for their cell numbers? Did they give you their cell numbers? Did you try to get a flat fee from any of them or did they say they would bill by the hour or were unable to give you an estimate as to how much they would charge? Did you go online to see if people were happy or pissed off (that's no holy grail, because often the lawyer himself and/or his family and friends post the positive reviews)? If you see any negative reviews, stay the hell away.
Divorce rape trolls. A new breed which has been all over the place lately.
Edit: I'm well aware that criminal cases are not divorce cases. I mentioned criminal cases, which need to be tried, in order to distinguish them from divorce cases, which need to be worked out.
Knock it off. Few of us who have been divorce raped are "trolls", especially in this forum. No, I did little research. I didn't want the divorce. I wanted to hold things together for the sake of my children. My ex is the one who wanted it, and I got sucked into the vortex. Yes, in a perfect world, I should have done more research. No, I didn't have your own knowledge of how things worked, because I'm not a lawyer, or expert in divorce law, nor do I have any desire to be.
Maybe you, as an apparent expert in the subject, should submit a post to this forum, or Return of Kings, to provide some useful information to men going through it. Calling us trolls or stupid after the fact is not helpful to any of us. It's not productive, and is little more than argumentative. None of what you've written here is useful to me two years later. I doubt it helps any other man on this forum who has been divorce raped at any point in time before your contributions to this thread.
Quote: (10-07-2015 08:17 PM)Menace Wrote:
Emuelle I went through mediation as well but mine cost a fraction of what yours did. What did you spend your time talking about ? Aside from custody issues, everything else is pretty much non-controversial. You just split 50/50 and that's it.
Quote: (10-07-2015 08:22 PM)Merenguero Wrote:
Quote: (10-07-2015 08:17 PM)Menace Wrote:
Emuelle I went through mediation as well but mine cost a fraction of what yours did. What did you spend your time talking about ? Aside from custody issues, everything else is pretty much non-controversial. You just split 50/50 and that's it.
I obviously agree with all of this. He just seems really angry and is venting.
Quote: (10-08-2015 09:08 PM)JayR Wrote:
For those who say "just stay out of family court," it is good advice. But it's not always possible when your kid is being held hostage.
Quote: (10-07-2015 07:12 PM)Merenguero Wrote:
Quote: (10-07-2015 07:02 PM)emuelle1 Wrote:
Quote: (10-07-2015 06:50 PM)Merenguero Wrote:
I will say this. I've been doing this for a while and have never even seen a bar complaint.
I'm pretty sure I know how things work "in real life." I've handled hundreds of divorces over the years. ........
Did you check to see which lawyers had sued their clients and how often? That doesn't take "fucking weeks" to do. It may take an hour.
Quote: (10-08-2015 10:34 PM)Sexus Wrote:
Quote: (10-08-2015 09:08 PM)JayR Wrote:
For those who say "just stay out of family court," it is good advice. But it's not always possible when your kid is being held hostage.
The real questions are: how do we go about rolling back (and forward) the crimes against family and relationships that was done with VAWA/Title-IV ( https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Violence_A..._Women_Act ) from 1994 to the present? And how do we achieve an evolved and advantageous balance for the generations to come?
Quote:Quote:
I'm a licensed professional in another field and your pompous tone talking down to the man who was dissatisfied typifies what people don't like about lawyers.
You are unsympathetic to the fact that the average person doesn't understand the power State licensing boards have over professionals, or even know that a licensing/ethics board exists.
If the person knows an ethics board exists and is part of the government, he might reasonably expect it to be a rubber-stamp insider controlled bunch of cronies that would never discipline one of their own.
When you work 10-20 years to GET a license, you know that isn't true and that the ethics boards can be not only relevant but persecutory, but your presumption that the average person "should" know this is just unreasonable.