One thing I don't like about the "women can't be trusted" sentiment is that it seems really hypocritical to me. I mean, honestly, how many men can be trusted? It's extremely hard to meet male friends you can put any faith in for the long run, right? Even bros you do accept and trust will eventually let you down at some point, if only out of momentary human weakness - they say you're lucky if you make it to the end of your life with even a few really good friends still intact.
And as far as relationships are concerned, a lot of guys given the opportunity will also cheat on there bishes. In fact, I don't think there's even one study out there that shows women being more unfaithful than men.
You could come up with arguments for these studies being flawed, but if you want to try and claim they're all flawed or honestly believe the real stats are anywhere close to 100% you may be clinging a little hard to your negative preconceived notions.
I mean, think about it. Most men on here are pretty sexed, I'd say. How many of us if we had the sexual power of women wouldn't be cheating as much as possible? If we could snap our fingers and get laid whenever we wanted (which I acknowledge some guys here about can), I'd say we'd be cheating far more often than women and lying about it more too (though we'd be more likely to get caught since we tend to suck at lying).
The stats already show us doing it more so think about what it would look like if our barriers to "entry" were lower....
Hell, I'm a lying little slut too - or at least under the influence of alcohol I always slept around and then lied to cover my tracks in the morning (I hardly ever cheated when sober). But I don't think I've ever been in a relationship I haven't strayed from at least once. I've kissed girlfriends with another pussy on my breath, come home from ex's houses to crawl in bed with my current, "lost" my phone, lied my ass off when confronted, cultivated girls on the back burner in case things didn't work out, banged women without telling them I was taken, flirted relentlessly, cheated on women (even a fiance) I was in love with, hooked up with their friends, and all of the above.
And I've seen lots of my buddies do it too. If they've got game and opportunities present themselves, they partake, especially if a bit of booze is involved. So kind of hard to take guys seriously who just point the finger at the nature of females.
There are also men out there who legitimately won't cheat no matter what - I've seen these guys truly hold strong and was surprised by it - and I feel the same is true for women. It used to be that men cheated more but the figures have gotten closer to each other in modern times, most likely because women are more promiscuous now than they were in the past. Given that I know and have witnessed faithful men, I don't think women should mistrust all men or make blanket statements about us based on my own behavior.
If anything, it's a human thing not a gender thing. And even then it's nowhere near all men or women willing to do it. Guys with game tend to see a lot of shitty, conniving human behavior but unless you think all studies about infidelity are really that far off from the truth, try not to read too much into it.
If you really want to go down the rabbit hole, consider why you really don't trust women. You may not be the one in a relationship but you're willing to have sex with married women and help her cheat. Your willingness to participate in that type of behavior skews your perception of reality and what humans are like (only you then project it as being a female trait).
On the other hand, a guy who never strays and would turn down sex from committed women might have a more positive perception because even though he's had the offers he refuses to associate with women like that and proves to himself that not participating is possible.
So maybe ask yourself how the behavior you've chosen to involve yourself in skews your experiences with the opposite sex...I mean aren't you untrustworthy for doing this stuff too? And aren't you a man? Maybe with a little bit more respect for yourself and for the sanctity that is supposed to exist in relationships you could find it in yourself to believe others could do the same.
Don't get me wrong, I'm certainly not preaching some higher position of morality - like I said, I've played with the worst of them - but I think we ought to be a little more fair about who is capable of what. And if we want to mistrust people, I don't necessarily think we should demonize based on gender.
I know already some of you are going to assert that I'm naive and delusional and just don't "understand how women work." But again, you're going against all statistical evidence that exists on the subject. I'm fine with you doing that, but without some hard counter-evidence to back up your claim, I also find it difficult to take you seriously on the matter.
I completely agree with everyone who says the key is to learn not to care too much though. This is how I've dealt with the issue and it's not always easy but it does the trick. If I have no reason to mistrust, I let it go and don't overthink it. If something comes up, she's gone. Seems to work for me.
I get where you guys are coming from, though; I really do. It just doesn't seem to be backed up by the known "facts" and comes across as an opinion based on emotion and subjective experience.
And as far as relationships are concerned, a lot of guys given the opportunity will also cheat on there bishes. In fact, I don't think there's even one study out there that shows women being more unfaithful than men.
You could come up with arguments for these studies being flawed, but if you want to try and claim they're all flawed or honestly believe the real stats are anywhere close to 100% you may be clinging a little hard to your negative preconceived notions.
I mean, think about it. Most men on here are pretty sexed, I'd say. How many of us if we had the sexual power of women wouldn't be cheating as much as possible? If we could snap our fingers and get laid whenever we wanted (which I acknowledge some guys here about can), I'd say we'd be cheating far more often than women and lying about it more too (though we'd be more likely to get caught since we tend to suck at lying).
The stats already show us doing it more so think about what it would look like if our barriers to "entry" were lower....
Hell, I'm a lying little slut too - or at least under the influence of alcohol I always slept around and then lied to cover my tracks in the morning (I hardly ever cheated when sober). But I don't think I've ever been in a relationship I haven't strayed from at least once. I've kissed girlfriends with another pussy on my breath, come home from ex's houses to crawl in bed with my current, "lost" my phone, lied my ass off when confronted, cultivated girls on the back burner in case things didn't work out, banged women without telling them I was taken, flirted relentlessly, cheated on women (even a fiance) I was in love with, hooked up with their friends, and all of the above.
And I've seen lots of my buddies do it too. If they've got game and opportunities present themselves, they partake, especially if a bit of booze is involved. So kind of hard to take guys seriously who just point the finger at the nature of females.
There are also men out there who legitimately won't cheat no matter what - I've seen these guys truly hold strong and was surprised by it - and I feel the same is true for women. It used to be that men cheated more but the figures have gotten closer to each other in modern times, most likely because women are more promiscuous now than they were in the past. Given that I know and have witnessed faithful men, I don't think women should mistrust all men or make blanket statements about us based on my own behavior.
If anything, it's a human thing not a gender thing. And even then it's nowhere near all men or women willing to do it. Guys with game tend to see a lot of shitty, conniving human behavior but unless you think all studies about infidelity are really that far off from the truth, try not to read too much into it.
If you really want to go down the rabbit hole, consider why you really don't trust women. You may not be the one in a relationship but you're willing to have sex with married women and help her cheat. Your willingness to participate in that type of behavior skews your perception of reality and what humans are like (only you then project it as being a female trait).
On the other hand, a guy who never strays and would turn down sex from committed women might have a more positive perception because even though he's had the offers he refuses to associate with women like that and proves to himself that not participating is possible.
So maybe ask yourself how the behavior you've chosen to involve yourself in skews your experiences with the opposite sex...I mean aren't you untrustworthy for doing this stuff too? And aren't you a man? Maybe with a little bit more respect for yourself and for the sanctity that is supposed to exist in relationships you could find it in yourself to believe others could do the same.
Don't get me wrong, I'm certainly not preaching some higher position of morality - like I said, I've played with the worst of them - but I think we ought to be a little more fair about who is capable of what. And if we want to mistrust people, I don't necessarily think we should demonize based on gender.
I know already some of you are going to assert that I'm naive and delusional and just don't "understand how women work." But again, you're going against all statistical evidence that exists on the subject. I'm fine with you doing that, but without some hard counter-evidence to back up your claim, I also find it difficult to take you seriously on the matter.
I completely agree with everyone who says the key is to learn not to care too much though. This is how I've dealt with the issue and it's not always easy but it does the trick. If I have no reason to mistrust, I let it go and don't overthink it. If something comes up, she's gone. Seems to work for me.
I get where you guys are coming from, though; I really do. It just doesn't seem to be backed up by the known "facts" and comes across as an opinion based on emotion and subjective experience.
Beyond All Seas
"The individual has always had to struggle to keep from being overwhelmed by the tribe.
To be your own man is a hard business. If you try it, you'll be lonely often, and sometimes
frightened. But no price is too high to pay for the privilege of owning yourself." - Kipling
"The individual has always had to struggle to keep from being overwhelmed by the tribe.
To be your own man is a hard business. If you try it, you'll be lonely often, and sometimes
frightened. But no price is too high to pay for the privilege of owning yourself." - Kipling
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