Now that I’m here, let me present my case to this assembly of wise men.
I have a girlfriend. She’s pretty. She’s feminine. She’s smart. She loves dogs. She’s slim and has beautiful breasts, which I’m crazy about.
I have always had a girlfriend... But there was one girl who was never my girlfriend. She’s 30 now. If I spend time enough away from her, I’m ok and overall happy with things. If I meet her, I get the feeling that ‘this is it.’ Being 33, I can honestly say this is the one girl who ever made me feel... truly inspired. Who never made me think marriage would require extraordinary fortitude.
At the same time, I’m well aware that my experience of her was never tainted by seeing her every day. From what I know about her, I’m not even sure we’re greatly compatible: let’s say I’m a concert hall, wine-tasting, classical scholar (yes) kind of guy, and she’s a lawyer with a high-paying public job and very common tastes.
I’m aware she has used the way she makes me feel over the years to get an ego boost. I’m also not sure that shunning her out of revenge for having used me thus would necessarily be wise - it actually sounds stupid and small.
Now there comes the catch. She’s been with the same guy for... what? Ten years now? And they got married. Not in the church (she’s Catholic, he’s Jewish). She invited me to the ceremony, I replied with a teasing answer, and she never wrote back. A few months later I send her a one-line e-mail, ‘So, did you really get married?,’ and she says, ‘Yes, but it was nothing serious, no church or anything, just a civil marriage.’
Her husband is a PhD student, who’s doing part of his course abroad. She’s traveling to meet him on Saturday (don’t know when she or he will come back, but I assume she’s coming back in a few days). She said: “Let’s meet, I’m traveling on Saturday.” I am traveling with my current girlfriend on Friday, four days away at the beach.
Last time I met this married girl we were all ‘I love you’ (she actually said that). I had kept a teasing attitude and I thought she would back off if I tried to kiss her (after all, she did mention her boyfriend during the evening, and not just once), but soon I regretted not taking the risk - following the principle that no girl will ever be offended if a worthy man tries to kiss her.
At this point I’m making calculations. I don’t want deal with the kryptonite effect this girl has on me, making me think of her for days without end, and also making me think she only wanted the ego boost.
I don’t feel like trying to kiss her if it’s not for real, facing the consequences, ending relationships, starting a new life and all. I also feel guilt and shame for not leaving my comfort zone with this particular girl. Apparently she’s the only girl about whom I cannot think clearly, and this is why I submit my case to you, wise men.
Ok, I texted her asking when she would be back from abroad and she said Dec. 28 - five weeks with him. She also spoke on the first person plural. But she added that the fact that there are videos of me on the internet is good for when she misses me.
I have a girlfriend. She’s pretty. She’s feminine. She’s smart. She loves dogs. She’s slim and has beautiful breasts, which I’m crazy about.
I have always had a girlfriend... But there was one girl who was never my girlfriend. She’s 30 now. If I spend time enough away from her, I’m ok and overall happy with things. If I meet her, I get the feeling that ‘this is it.’ Being 33, I can honestly say this is the one girl who ever made me feel... truly inspired. Who never made me think marriage would require extraordinary fortitude.
At the same time, I’m well aware that my experience of her was never tainted by seeing her every day. From what I know about her, I’m not even sure we’re greatly compatible: let’s say I’m a concert hall, wine-tasting, classical scholar (yes) kind of guy, and she’s a lawyer with a high-paying public job and very common tastes.
I’m aware she has used the way she makes me feel over the years to get an ego boost. I’m also not sure that shunning her out of revenge for having used me thus would necessarily be wise - it actually sounds stupid and small.
Now there comes the catch. She’s been with the same guy for... what? Ten years now? And they got married. Not in the church (she’s Catholic, he’s Jewish). She invited me to the ceremony, I replied with a teasing answer, and she never wrote back. A few months later I send her a one-line e-mail, ‘So, did you really get married?,’ and she says, ‘Yes, but it was nothing serious, no church or anything, just a civil marriage.’
Her husband is a PhD student, who’s doing part of his course abroad. She’s traveling to meet him on Saturday (don’t know when she or he will come back, but I assume she’s coming back in a few days). She said: “Let’s meet, I’m traveling on Saturday.” I am traveling with my current girlfriend on Friday, four days away at the beach.
Last time I met this married girl we were all ‘I love you’ (she actually said that). I had kept a teasing attitude and I thought she would back off if I tried to kiss her (after all, she did mention her boyfriend during the evening, and not just once), but soon I regretted not taking the risk - following the principle that no girl will ever be offended if a worthy man tries to kiss her.
At this point I’m making calculations. I don’t want deal with the kryptonite effect this girl has on me, making me think of her for days without end, and also making me think she only wanted the ego boost.
I don’t feel like trying to kiss her if it’s not for real, facing the consequences, ending relationships, starting a new life and all. I also feel guilt and shame for not leaving my comfort zone with this particular girl. Apparently she’s the only girl about whom I cannot think clearly, and this is why I submit my case to you, wise men.
Ok, I texted her asking when she would be back from abroad and she said Dec. 28 - five weeks with him. She also spoke on the first person plural. But she added that the fact that there are videos of me on the internet is good for when she misses me.