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How to deal with uncomfortable silences?
#1

How to deal with uncomfortable silences?

So in bang Roosh says first half hour you should talk your ass off after that you can lay back and silences are even welcomed.

Couple of days ago I talked to this girl outside a club. I talked to her for one hour at least. Plus I talked to her earlier in the day. I finally got her alone since her friend left. The moment her friend leaves there are couple seconds of silences and she felt uncomfortable I guess and leaves too.

My question is, are silences good or bad after one hour of talking? I'm not a guy who can talk endlessly but I talk at least about the topics Roosh recommends in bang (in clubs) and run galnuc plus more. At some point I just get blocked after chating for some while and I don't have anything to say. The thing I noticed some girls are uncomfortable with the silences and some are not.

Is it me who is at fault? Or is it some of them who are uncomfortable with some silence.
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#2

How to deal with uncomfortable silences?

Silences allow you to build lots of tension.

Touch her throughout the interaction, so you communicate your interest physically and build attraction. If she sticks around after her friend leaves and isn't hesitant to leave just yet, that's a green light for you to keep escalating.

Use the silences to maintain longer eye contact. Get in close proximity. If she doesn't back away, just go for a kiss.

As long as you've been touching her and escalating by touching her hips, abdomen, lower back, ass, a kiss is almost a given.

Grab her hands, raise them and put them around your neck, pull her in by her waist, maintain that eye contact, and kiss. The slower you do this the more tension and the better the kiss will be.
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#3

How to deal with uncomfortable silences?

Whip your dick out. I've never really done this but I would like t know what would happen.
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#4

How to deal with uncomfortable silences?

Quote: (10-21-2013 11:41 AM)kickboxer Wrote:  

Whip your dick out. I've never really done this but I would like t know what would happen.
In your case you don't have to whip one out if you know what I mean
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#5

How to deal with uncomfortable silences?

[Image: agree.gif]
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#6

How to deal with uncomfortable silences?

I love these. Silences are only uncomfortable if you let them be. A man who knows what he's about does not get restless 2 seconds after the last uttered word. That is the moment you display with body language that you are not fazed.
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#7

How to deal with uncomfortable silences?

Agreed, I let that shit simmer. However, sometimes I just pull shit from around to keep a decent flow of conversation with added pauses for effect.
Playing dumb seems to help in a crutch
e.g.
Her: So, yeah...
You:....
Her.....
You: Is this cashmere?
Continue conversation... there will be natural things that evolve for you to work on.
I asked a girl if her jacket was leather, she said no, and I blanked out. Came back with "you're not in PETA are you? Trashing fine mink coats on the weekend?" Not the best example, but you get the idea.
It takes a strong sense of frame and confidence to just sit and rely on subtle body language cues. I've notice more often than not though, if it's an hour or so in, those silences provide good opportunities for playing with the back of her hand if she's close (which, after an hour should be very close) or futzing around with the ends of her hair.
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#8

How to deal with uncomfortable silences?

Quote: (10-21-2013 09:03 AM)Videl Wrote:  

I talked to her for one hour at least. Plus I talked to her earlier in the day. I finally got her alone since her friend left.

...
.
I'm not a guy who can talk endlessly

You sure bout that Hoss? An Hour? With an audience?

Quote: (10-21-2013 09:03 AM)Videl Wrote:  

At some point I just get blocked after chating for some while and I don't have anything to say. The thing I noticed some girls are uncomfortable with the silences and some are not.

Is it me who is at fault? Or is it some of them who are uncomfortable with some silence.

1) You can talk
2) it is your fault (but not for the reasons you think)
3) most people can be uncomfortable with science.

I can see your hamster wheel already smoking at the axle.

Just because you can monologue FOR AN HOUR,
- doesn't mean you should
- doesn't mean it's working

The other missing ingredients here are
- you have not told us what you said, what you were talking about for an HOUR.
- nor have you told us what SHE SAID WHILE THE 2 OF YOU TALKED

If you can't enlighten us about what you actually said to 2 chicks over the course of an hour, nor what the target chick said nor what the obstacle chick said, how they reacted, what their body language was, what the setting was, whether there was any distraction - you won't go any farther with this kind of game.

So think back
- where did this happen
- what were you wearing, how did you feel
- how did you approach
- what did she say to your approach
- how was her body language
- did you ask her questions? Make bold statements? cold read her? GET HER TO PARTICIPATE IN ANYWAY?
- what was the overall tone of the conversation?
- How did the obstacle girl react? Did you include the obstacle in the conversation?

If you don't take the time to notice how your target is reacting to what you do, and to think about what is happening at the time, - this style of game IS NOT FOR YOU.

Maybe you'd do better lifting more weights, dressing cooler, getting drunk, and using loud asshole/dancefloor/physical style game instead of trying to get at her frontal cortex.


WIA
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#9

How to deal with uncomfortable silences?

Quote: (10-21-2013 09:03 AM)Videl Wrote:  

My question is, are silences good or bad after one hour of talking?
When you both attracted to each other and get lost in the sexy moment [looking deeply in each other eyes feeling the tension rising] then it's fine. When there's no spark/tension then it might get a bit weird. It's time to spin the plates some more and carry on.


Quote: (10-21-2013 09:03 AM)Videl Wrote:  

t some point I just get blocked after chating for some while and I don't have anything to say. The thing I noticed some girls are uncomfortable with the silences and some are not.
It's your role to help girls feel comfortable with you. You can always acknowledge it saying "i feel like getting lost in the moment" or "it's ok, don't worry, everybody is a little bit shy, it's fine, show me your smile number 3"


Quote: (10-21-2013 09:03 AM)Videl Wrote:  

Is it me who is at fault? Or is it some of them who are uncomfortable with some silence.
I think in your case it was just energy dying out due to the lack of chemistry. No worry.
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#10

How to deal with uncomfortable silences?

I love silences but it's like comfort after building attraction, if you look relaxed she'll be relaxed today

Don't forget to check out my latest post on Return of Kings - 6 Things Indian Guys Need To Understand About Game

Desi Casanova
The 3 Bromigos
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#11

How to deal with uncomfortable silences?

It depends whether the girl is polish, western, Russian, Balkan etc.With eastern slavic girls silences are good.In fact part of girl's good behaviour is to remain silent (passivity) so you can develop deeper feelings (slavic metaphysics concentrate on each other).Typical example the Russian guy who stares the girl for an hour without saying nothing.

With western slavic girls you have to be talkative but with low level energy and lots of subcommunication and gentlety lots of personal stuff etc while with western girls you need to be high energy constantly and very stimulating, entertaining you have to really put up a show.Also much more shining, unique, high value etc.Western girls get bored very quickly because their environment is rather stimulating so they have become desensitised to simple things.

With Mediterranean girls you really need to be master of manipulation because you play on lots of different levels which are completely lost to outsiders a 50% or more of things is not spoken but implied so the other part has to make lots of assumptions.It is also more intriguing you have to tell every cliche and play upon it because Mediterranean girls have heard everything already and are exposed to high levels of attraction.
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