[Agastya]

I was at a college party on Del Playa and met this half white half Indian freshman. Seduced her through lies about how I'm a second year finance major visiting from UChicago, said I was staying with my cousin in his dorm, said I was half Indian and half Iranian(thought she was Iranian at first), and told her that my name was Ray(it isn't).

She was probably somewhat attracted from the outset and the lies compounded it. Being very into me, she refused to allow her friends to cockblock the two of us. We enjoyed five hours of glorious sex in my dorm room. Woke up to the sight of the sunrise on the ocean outside my window and a beautiful girl sleeping next to me. Experienced a moment of blissful perfection

Issue is the identity I gave her was completely false. I'm full Indian, a freshman, a student at the UC, and my name is not Ray. She found out all of this shortly after going home, as she angrily told me once I sent her some troll texts the following evening.

This girl is obviously pretty pissed at me. I'm on cloud nine since she was very cute and great in the sack, but I'd rather avoid the danger posed by a girl who hates me(might spread unhealthy rumors if she hasn't already, could assault me at a party or viciously cockblock me). As such, would it be worth my while to apologize to her on text? Maybe say something like "it was fucked of me to troll you like that, i compulsively lie when I'm drunk".

I'm obviously not doing this out of any real remorse(I think it was hilarious and awesome), I'm just trying to do some damage control? RVF, do you think it's a good idea?

[Matt3B]

I'll tell you what's a good idea and how to avoid "the danger posed by a girl who hates me": don't lie to girls.

What's the point?

[Ziltoid]

Apologizing to her will probably just make her more likely to go the character assassination or false rape claim route.

I think I'd personally have to go with "I figured you knew I was just joking, you seemed smart enough"
Though, I'd have not lied in the first place.

[Therapsid]

I'd just ignore her.

Use the momentum from banging this girl to pickup new girls.

I've been in this situation before, most recently a couple months ago. Girl texted me angry that I lied about my name and age. I just ignored her, because it wasn't worth encouraging her spreading shit or contacting my regular girls.

[Agastya]

(10-15-2013 09:17 PM)MattC Wrote:  

I'll tell you what's a good idea and how to avoid "the danger posed by a girl who hates me": don't lie to girls.

What's the point?

Eh, I felt like I needed to cement her attraction. Pulling girls at parties is made difficult almost entirely because of cockblocking friends, whose sway over the girl is inversely related to her level of attraction for you. Freshmen girls will be more attracted to older guys by default(hence the lie about being a second year), and the girl was half Indian, hence the UChicago lie(every Indian girl I've ever known, to some degree, has been something of an intellectual golddigger). The Iranian thing was because I thought she was Persian, typically it helps to claim that you and a girl have some ethnic commonality if you can get away with it.

Because of these deceptions the girl was very DTF and acted upon it. Sadly though this killed any chance of her becoming a repeat hookup. I guess I took the lesser risk over the greater reward.

[Wahawahwah]

If you lie, lie through your teeth and own it. But realize that nothing long term can come out of this, so if u really do like a girl, you're fucked.

Most often it is better to just own who you are. Sure, you'll get blown out more, but keep at it and eventually you'll solidify your story. There've been a few posts about this that draw out the relevant analogies -- game is essentially selling yourself right.

A good rule of thumb is never to apologize unless you do something really wrong (shoot her in the foot, accidentally burn her house down, give her aids etc). No need to act like an indifferent motherfucker all the time, but there's no need to bend over backwards for such silly things. If you've not already done so, there is no need to apologize. Go the nuclear way.

Since you've already fucked, tell her you liked her and thought she was a cool chick. That you were pretty obviously trolling and thought she knew. Ignore everything she says after this. After she spews a little bullshit you stop her, look her in the eye, and tell her, Look, this is who I am. You like me just as much as I like you, but you want to act all offended and shit, go on. Do it. (straight expressionless face please. Monotone). If she starts backpedalling,good. If she starts with the bullshit again, good. If she gets nonplussed and shuts up, good. You walk away from there and ignore her calls/texts/any contact. Let her see you talk to other girls, make them smile (your lying necessiates plausible deniability, at all times). Give her a couple of days to wonder about you. If she doesnt try to get in touch by then, use some sort of restarter text or oops!wrong number type of text.

And please get some real shit done in these two days.

Good luck

[FourToTheFloor]

"Oh, I tell wild stories when I'm drunk! You actually took me seriously???"

[sixsix]

(10-16-2013 12:01 AM)FourToTheFloor Wrote:  

"Oh, I tell wild stories when I'm drunk! You actually took me seriously???"

I would go with this approach.

I never lie about things, as in serious lying about my age, what I do, how much money I have or any other things that would make me look better. That's lying because you don't think the real you deserves the girl.

What I do instead, like a fiend, is BULLSHIT.

When I am drinking I am a fucking nonsense machine and am never serious (actually realized it can and does backfire sometimes at a recent house party, but that's neither here nor there).

I bullshit about what I do: Stupid shit like a forrest trooper (we don't even have those here).
I bullshit about working out: "I do... like... pushups and situps sometimes." Go to the gym quite a bit, actually.
I bullshit about my heritage: Couldn't be more Nordic even if I tried, though.

The reason is two-fold. 1. I don't want to talk about boring shit. So I keep it playful and use this as a way to segue into more interesting and fun conversations. 2. Check how naive she is (and give her shit for it). If someone believes your obvious nonsense and you call her out, she will qualify herself. It can also progress into role-playing and such.

So what should you do?

Play this like you were obviously fucking around and indeed always do this when drinking. "Come on women, do I even look Iranian or like a Ray?" And then pretend like it is not a big deal and continue. Joke a bit. "You are [a girl/legal age/blonde] right?"

[soup]

Don't ever have to apologize for anything.

[Statsi]

There's no rules to this thing, to life, to anything. Just social pressure and other people trying to control you. Do what you feel and don't apologise. If you don't want to see the girl again then just ignore her, if you do then ask her out and add her to the harem like usual. If she gives you shit just say nothing or 'whatever'.

[Mentavious]

I hope you have texts of her saying how good the sex was and other things confirming it was consensual.

You lied to a girl to get her into bed and now she knows. She thinks she was tricked into it which is rape in the minds of many women.

[Beyond Borders]

(10-15-2013 09:08 PM)Agastya Wrote:  

We enjoyed five hours of glorious sex in my dorm room. Woke up to the sight of the sunrise on the ocean outside my window and a beautiful girl sleeping next to me. Experienced a moment of blissful perfection

You a romance writer or something? lol

Quote:

Issue is the identity I gave her was completely false. I'm full Indian, a freshman, a student at the UC, and my name is not Ray. She found out all of this shortly after going home, as she angrily told me once I sent her some troll texts the following evening.

I really never understood the lying thing. Seems so insecure to me.

Even strange. I've known guys that did it but these guys always seemed kind of off as it was. I imagine more than being pissed she probably thinks you have a mental disorder; at least that's how I always feel when I find out someone is constantly lying about who they are for no apparent reason - it just seems a little out there.

And how did she find out? I can at least see some guy heading out into the urban jungle and conning lizards like the guy from "Catch Me if You Can" if it's just a one-off deal, but if you're doing stuff like this in situations where you're likely to get found out later and have it backfire, well...I must repeat that it seems like a sign of a few synapses misfiring or some deep insecurities about yourself that you need to address.

Good luck.

[Agastya]

[quote='Beyond Borders' pid='557246' dateline='1381924218']

You a romance writer or something? lol

[quote]

Hey, it was a good night

[quote='Beyond Borders' pid='557246' dateline='1381924218']
I really never understood the lying thing. Seems so insecure to me.

Even strange. I've known guys that did it but these guys always seemed kind of off as it was. I imagine more than being pissed she probably thinks you have a mental disorder; at least that's how I always feel when I find out someone is constantly lying about who they are for no apparent reason - it just seems a little out there.

And how did she find out? I can at least see some guy heading out into the urban jungle and conning lizards like the guy from "Catch Me if You Can" if it's just a one-off deal, but if you're doing stuff like this in situations where you're likely to get found out later and have it backfire, well...I must repeat that it seems like a sign of a few synapses misfiring or some deep insecurities about yourself that you need to address.

Good luck.
[/quote]

Not a bad point to make. I think I need to find a happy medium between my natural impulse to troll and my desire to get repeat bangs. Trolling, while highly enjoyable and de-pedestalizing, can be a cockblock in and of itself. And I suppose I should just tell girls that I'm a first year.

[The Beast1]

(10-16-2013 02:51 AM)soup Wrote:  

Don't ever have to apologize for anything.

x2, i always go for the "My bad".