This is an obvious idea, but I read a lot of threads where guys are getting themselves into situations where it's very hard to not look like a chump. I've been in a lot of situations like these, and making this thread to help you guys not waste your time.
I'm also learning more about this, and hope this thread will give me even greater insight into coolness.
There are two ways to approach being cool that you need to maximize:
1) Avoiding situations where you will come off as un-cool
2) Putting yourself in as many situations were you will be as cool as possible.
All of this will make no sense to you if you don't have a concept of what it means to be cool. From afar, when we think of stereotypes of cool you might think of someone like James Dean- he definitely was.
But, just like there are many different qualities of women that, like developing your palette for wine, require a great deal of experience to be able to perceive, it's the same with being cool.
For example, ever notice how girls you might have thought were perfect in your bluepill days are actually quite flawed now that you've been in the game for a while. Your 10 highschool crush seems to have a slightly more crooked nose and generally less facial symmetry post red-pill. Maybe you look back at her pictures and notice she was actually a little chubby, or her legs were kind of short.
It's the same thing with cool. I look back a few years, and I see how uncool my game was. My game is changing a lot now, and I can look back even half a year and see what I previously could not; there were things I wasn't aware of in my game that were uncool. There still are things that I'm not aware of that are holding back the cool in my game.
To consciously avoid situations that were the odds are stacked against you being cool (instead of just happening through life and hoping for the best), you have to be able recognize these pitfalls.
A great example of this is going to the club on a Friday or Saturday night. If you are just getting started in the game, this is actually one of the worst situations. All the girls have their bitch shields on max, there are tons of dudes to compete with, and often a general sense of tension and lack of class (in most venues) as people work to relieve themselves from the stress of having boring lives during the week.
When you get to higher level of game, you can actually use all this to your advantage or not be phased by it, but if I could go back in time, I'd tell myself to forget about crunch time at the bar.
I'm not saying you shouldn't challenge yourself, but start with the most obvious, easy situations, and build up form there. At every stage, you should be cool. Sure, you need to take risks to get better, but you don't have to go out and break yourself. It's like working out- you can fuck your muscles up if you take on too much when you just getting started.
Seek out situations where you are the coolest person in the room and take full advantage of these using all the stuff we talk about on the forum until you are totally bored. Then it's time to take on more difficult situations.
If you are totally socially awkward and are just getting into game, I highly recommend you check out Roosh's Day Bang to get a good understanding on how to maintain coolness in mundane day game situations. A lot of what he talks about in that book has become the cornerstone of my interaction with women.
To be able to see cool, you've got to hone your perceptive capabilities. Yes, this comes through trial and error, but try to be sensitive and open your eyes to what's happening around you, and it will probably come faster for you.
Don't be lazy; pay attention when things are not working out for you, and make changes. Albert Einstein said that the definition of insanity was doing the same thing over and over while expecting while expecting different results.
You should be constantly seeking out and trying situations where you are the coolest person in the group. This could be hosting parties or doing club promoting. It could be approaching a girl on the train when all the other guys are too pussy or inept to actually open a girl. This could be being the best dressed, or most built guy in the room. It could be being the best dancer, or most handsome guy.. whatever it takes to rise above the noise that most girls experience.
You need to stand out amongst the throngs of humdrum guys. Orchestrate your entire life to do this.
I don't believe in doing game on side or guys that are weekend warriors at game. The best way to get ready is to be ready all the time.
You will maximize your cool by pro-actively avoiding whack situations, and creating good ones.
This is a general concept that I keep in mind when I'm out.
Feel free to help flesh this out.
I'm also learning more about this, and hope this thread will give me even greater insight into coolness.
There are two ways to approach being cool that you need to maximize:
1) Avoiding situations where you will come off as un-cool
2) Putting yourself in as many situations were you will be as cool as possible.
All of this will make no sense to you if you don't have a concept of what it means to be cool. From afar, when we think of stereotypes of cool you might think of someone like James Dean- he definitely was.
But, just like there are many different qualities of women that, like developing your palette for wine, require a great deal of experience to be able to perceive, it's the same with being cool.
For example, ever notice how girls you might have thought were perfect in your bluepill days are actually quite flawed now that you've been in the game for a while. Your 10 highschool crush seems to have a slightly more crooked nose and generally less facial symmetry post red-pill. Maybe you look back at her pictures and notice she was actually a little chubby, or her legs were kind of short.
It's the same thing with cool. I look back a few years, and I see how uncool my game was. My game is changing a lot now, and I can look back even half a year and see what I previously could not; there were things I wasn't aware of in my game that were uncool. There still are things that I'm not aware of that are holding back the cool in my game.
To consciously avoid situations that were the odds are stacked against you being cool (instead of just happening through life and hoping for the best), you have to be able recognize these pitfalls.
A great example of this is going to the club on a Friday or Saturday night. If you are just getting started in the game, this is actually one of the worst situations. All the girls have their bitch shields on max, there are tons of dudes to compete with, and often a general sense of tension and lack of class (in most venues) as people work to relieve themselves from the stress of having boring lives during the week.
When you get to higher level of game, you can actually use all this to your advantage or not be phased by it, but if I could go back in time, I'd tell myself to forget about crunch time at the bar.
I'm not saying you shouldn't challenge yourself, but start with the most obvious, easy situations, and build up form there. At every stage, you should be cool. Sure, you need to take risks to get better, but you don't have to go out and break yourself. It's like working out- you can fuck your muscles up if you take on too much when you just getting started.
Seek out situations where you are the coolest person in the room and take full advantage of these using all the stuff we talk about on the forum until you are totally bored. Then it's time to take on more difficult situations.
If you are totally socially awkward and are just getting into game, I highly recommend you check out Roosh's Day Bang to get a good understanding on how to maintain coolness in mundane day game situations. A lot of what he talks about in that book has become the cornerstone of my interaction with women.
To be able to see cool, you've got to hone your perceptive capabilities. Yes, this comes through trial and error, but try to be sensitive and open your eyes to what's happening around you, and it will probably come faster for you.
Don't be lazy; pay attention when things are not working out for you, and make changes. Albert Einstein said that the definition of insanity was doing the same thing over and over while expecting while expecting different results.
You should be constantly seeking out and trying situations where you are the coolest person in the group. This could be hosting parties or doing club promoting. It could be approaching a girl on the train when all the other guys are too pussy or inept to actually open a girl. This could be being the best dressed, or most built guy in the room. It could be being the best dancer, or most handsome guy.. whatever it takes to rise above the noise that most girls experience.
You need to stand out amongst the throngs of humdrum guys. Orchestrate your entire life to do this.
I don't believe in doing game on side or guys that are weekend warriors at game. The best way to get ready is to be ready all the time.
You will maximize your cool by pro-actively avoiding whack situations, and creating good ones.
This is a general concept that I keep in mind when I'm out.
Feel free to help flesh this out.