Quote: (10-09-2013 07:38 AM)Parlay44 Wrote:
How do you feel about the social circle dynamic?
I know exactly how you feel.
There's a bigger red pill lesson lurking in the background imo, but I see social circle as the province of women. They love them. They nurture them. They protect them.
In terms of bedding chicks, the social circle
- presents options
- vets options
- provides punishment if she doesn't get her wishes
And speaking of punishment...
Have you ever been cast out of a social network?
I have. (3 times actually)
It's probably not until today, until right now @ 3:32 Central Standard Time, that I really thought about it in red pill terms.
Rewind to the early 90's.
Broughams in flat tops, Z Cavaricci's, polka dot shirts,
Hip Hop was in its golden age.
A young non-player WIA is unaware of the game, unaware of the red pill. If I were able to travel back in time and explain it to a young me, the young me would think the old me was CRAZY.
So it's high school, just starting to discover girls. Amongst my group of elementary school class mates, a new chick gets with the clique around middle school, and by high school, she's the center of attention. Call her Darla.
Now the Darla takes a shine to me, and i'm kinda feeling her back.
In the meantime, she also take a shine to another dude, call him Gerald.
It's like Twilight, just with geeky non-supernatural teenagers.
So there's this underlying tension between Me, Darla, and Gerald.
I make an off hand comment to a outlier to the group, let's call him John. John has a crush Darla. Darla is not aware that John exists in any sort of sexual fashion.
I say it's weird that Darla has become the nucleus of our group.
John tells Darla. Darla tells everyone in MY social circle.
And they decide? or she decides to punish me.
No one talks to me for at least a couple of months. They've known her for a few years, they've known me since we were all in short pants.
Eventually things resolve, apologies were made, but that teenage incident always stuck with me.
There are other HS incidents involving Darla. She did end up with Gerald and then abandoned him for Fred an upper classman. She's now a major "lean in" type chick in the corporate world.
To my knowledge, she never got her comeuppance.
That's the power of the social circle. It's why girls tend to be so obsessed with them. They understand the power of gossip, of intrigue, of isolation.
Dudes I used to play soccer with, watch Inspector Gadget with, cats that had been to my birthday parties - suddenly they didn't know me.
I could handle that now as a grown man. As a teenager?
I used to think this sort of behavior, this social circle thing, was aberrant.
Until I got out in the corporate world and started dealing with corporate chicks.
Lots of them only mess with known quantities
- guys they work with
- guys from college/grad school
- guys involved Greek activities (might be a black thing, can't speak for my Euro-brethren)
- guys from church
- guys vouched for by their GF's
In some sense, it takes real skill to break into a chick's life and fuck her, because her natural inclination is to use her social circle, her network to find fuck buddies and husbands.
You hear it when they talk to each other.
"I don't want to date around"
"I'm not trying to get with some random dude"
We see it when we travel. Plenty of hot chicks will have nothing to do with some gringo tourist - not any chick who has some station in her country.
Getting back to your Taye Diggs scenario, where everybody at the wedding has seen everyone else naked.
This is the norm.
And it is weird.
But it's by design.
In some sense, these women are creating tribes.
At the same time, these same women have hypergamous impulses.
Side dick within the tribe is vetted.
Side dick outside of the tribe? Appealing, but has to be under the right circumstances.
That's where we come in.
Your goal as a player is to become a member of many tribes. With worship, with work, with hobbies, with current family and friends. So that you can fuck your cousin's wife's sister and then see her at the cook out.
At the same time, you want out of that incestuous pool.
Yet meeting some strange girl at a bar or club or on the street, then having to impress her network...
"Who's this new guy"
"What's he about?"
"When do we get to meet him"
It almost seems like the world only gives you 3 options
- deal with your own circle
- deal with someone else's circle
- stay out of the whole thing altogether.
I dunno.
But I think the whole thing seems odd. I'll never understand my female counterparts that only want to meet or get with guys that they kinda already know. They're basically saying they want more of the same lackluster lives they've already been living.
It's like working at a job, where you're one of 2 young people (or Asian, or Indian, or Black, or Jewish) - the whole social circle is going to push you to be together. And to go along with the group....
WIA