Okay, this may be a somewhat beta post, and it's a topic that been touched on before, but I thought I would shed some more light on this phenomena. There are many aspects of the game that can't be quantified or qualified, there are some things that don't always make sense on paper, but they are a real tangible thing.
One of these "dogmas" of the game that I have found to be true, is "catching feelings" or getting your hopes up, or building a girl up in your mind before you've even had sex with her. This is something that I used to do all the time back in the day, in my pregame and early game years, and it's something that I sometimes still have to conciously work hard to repress doing.
Often times I meet a girl, usually a really beautiful girl, that I am really attracted to and seemingly has all the qualities that I desire, and inadvertently or inevitably I "catch feelings" for her on some level. Now usually this is due to us seeming to "hit it off" right from the get to, things seem to really fall into place, she appears to be really into me and the prospects of us making sweet love together and spending bunches or time together looks great...
Then like I said before we haven't even had sex I start to build up these grand scenarios into my mind about how things are going to be so great together, the great sex we'll have, the time spent enjoying each others company, going to the beach, going out for sushi and cocktails, etc. etc. The time we spend falling for each other.
But... In reality the little fantasy that I play out in my mind usually falls flat like a house of cards toppling over from a swift breeze.
Case in point, this is where the post may take a beta turn and I may delve into a lame story full of an overly detailed account, but I will try to keep it as concise as possible.
So I met this girl at the bar a little over a week ago, it was not this past Thursday, but the Thursday of last week, which is "college night" at the local bars and the best night of the week to go out and meet cute college girls.
This girl caught my eye immediately, she was petite, had a nice lushious perky round booty, nice big round titties, a very pretty young innocent face, with green eyes and curly black hair. She said she was a quarter black, part native American, but mostly of Russian descent, I'd rate her a solid 8.
Any how my approach hooked immediately, we seemed to hit it off, the bar was packed and there were a bunch of guys trying to say hi and talk to her, but she ignored them all, only to stick by my side, talking to me the whole night.
She bounced to another bar with me and we pretty much spent the whole night hanging out till last call, she made many comments about how she was kind of a shy, nerdy girl, who doesn't like to go out and party a lot, and she really likes to take "things slow."
At the end of the night I asked for her number and she seemed really enthusiastic about hanging out, and asked me to text her on the spot so she had my number too and told me to hit her up. I went for the kiss, but she turned her head to the side, seeming kind of self concious about kissing a guy at the bar, which I thought was lame, but I respected.
She was the only girl I stepped to and macked on that night, and we literally spent 3 hours hanging out at the bar talking that night, so I thought the outlook looked pretty good with her.
Then I did my standard, wait 3 days to send a text gambit, and sent her a text Sunday night, which she did not reply to. I basically at that point wrote her off and said she's a flake and not very interested, so I considered it a "dead prospect."
I went out again this past Thursday and ran into her again with a couple friends, this time she approached me and started talking, apologizing for not getting back to me, claiming she was in the bay area (which I call bullshit on), and told me to hit her up again. I took that as a good sign and figured that she was back "into play" and that I'd hit her up again at the end of the weekend.
Okay so I went out to the bar last night with a bro, and saw her holding some guys hand and walking out of the bar with him. Admittedly I was like "what the fuck", that's whack, I was mildly jealous and was seriously like "that guy", dude looked lame and certainly not as attractive as me.
Then my friend and I bounced to another bar, where she was at with that guy, plus a fat ugly friend, and another dude. It was pretty obvious that both guys were pining over her, and were just hanging out with the ugly friend by default.
Anyhow, decided to ignore her, but at some point not knowing where she was or really caring, I step out front to get some air and maybe see if there are any girls out front to spit to. Lo and behold the cute shorty is just chilling out front and we start talking, when she become very flirtatious and I proceed to hug her, and escalate "kino" as the PUAs would say.
We go back into the bar and I say "let me get you a drink", she's chilling at the bar with me, being super flirty and touchy feely, her "friends" are sitting in a booth directly across from us and the guys are basically starring me down with the evil eye.
It's getting close to last call, and one of the guys comes up and start talking to her, she then steps aside with him, and he's obviously not amused, he was the guy she was holding hands with at the other bar earlier.
After they talk for a couple minutes she comes back over to the bar where I'm chilling on a stool and starts talking to me agin like nothing happened. The bartender calls last call and her group comes and tries to make one last attempt to cockblock me and convince her to leave with them. She says she wants to stay and finish her drink and that she'll walk home.
Well I've been in the game for a minute so I knew this was a good sign, that fact that she was willing to ignore and ditch her cockblocking friends was a greenlight for me.
After we got kicked out of the bar, I told her I'd give her a ride home and she complied, when we got to her place she invited me into her place, but went on about how she "just wanted to chill and that I shouldn't expect anything, because she won't have sex with me." I've heard it all before and I know usually it's just their "anti slut defense" so that they don't look like a slut, when they really want the dick.
Anyway when we're in her place she starts acting kind of weird, alternating between telling me how she thinks I'm so cool, and how she want to hang out in the future, but then suddenly acting withdrawn, and unresponsive. We cracked some beers and watched Wilfred on netflix, I was kind of cuddling her and rubbing her thigh, kissing her neck, and putting my tongue in her ear, which she appeared to enjoy.
But everytime I went for the kiss she tried to avoid it and turning her head, and saying "no sorry, nothing is going to happen". Eventually I kept trying and went kind of "caveman" and grabbed her head to kiss her. She didn't resist that time, and we made out for a bit. However, we'd kiss for like 10 seconds then when I'd slip in toungue, she'd pull back and keep asserting that, that was it and she wasn't down for any more.
Really looking back now in retrospect I should have gone even more caveman and trying to suck her tits, finger her pussy, pull my dick out, just escalate it to that next level and try to push through her last minute resistance to try and make her horny enough to break down and give me the pussy.
However, she had planted the seed in my mind that she's a "good girl", doesn't like to "move too fast", and that she's "shy and innocent", all of which is probably just an absolute pile of horse shit.
Anyways after we make out for a bit, she asks me to leave because it's 3 AM and she's tired, and me trying to be a "respectful" nice guy, I oblige. However before I leave she's all acting all sprung on me, being like "we got to hang out soon, I had such a great night", blah, blah, blah. She tries to act all concerned for me, saying that she really wants me to text her when I get home to make sure I get home okay, and whatnot.
All systems appeared to be a go in my mind, although I didn't end up getting the "notch." I thought she's a nice girl, I got to take a different angle with her, she really seems into me, and she's most likely going to end up being girlfriend material.
I text her when I get home and she replies immediately, wishing me a good night, I'm lying in bed feeling really "high" off this girl, when my thoughts begin to slip into the realm of fantasy. I'm thinking about how I'm going to make sweet love to this nice innocent girl, how were going to fall for each other, she's going to on my arm, and I'm going to introduce her to everyone as my girlfriend. We are going to be so happy together, I will go on road trips with her down the Cali. coast and if things really work out maybe a romantic trip to Baja or Hawaii.
Mind you this is all after one night of hanging out with her and a make out session, these thoughts really aren't warranted at all, but based on my interaction and everything she was telling me it seemed golden. I got 3 other girls number on this past Thursday that I was going to text tonight, but as I lay in bed trying to sleep thinking about this girl, I was like forget those other girls I'm not going to even bother with them.
I had more or less made soft plans to go get sushi with this girl early this week, and the thought of me trying to schedule dates with other girls either a day before or day after, actually made me feel kind of bad, as retarded as that sounds as I type this.
Then this morning she sends me a text at 9 AM, simply saying "thanks for the ride home last night". I take that as a good sign that she's thinking about me. I was trying to snooze since I barely got any decent sleep so I waited an hour and a half, and replied with this: "For sure, no problem. It was nice hanging out with u, we should do it again sometime soon."
She replies about a half hour later with this: "Thanks I really had a good time too, but to be honest there is another guy that I'm into, and I want to bet on that. Sorry."
I got to admit it was kind of a punch in the gut, because that was pretty much the last thing I was expecting. But I am a naive fool for thinking that.
To me there are a few solid lessons to come out of this, NEVER PUT THE GIRL ON THE PEDESTAL, NEVER FANTASY OR GET ALL DREAMY ABOUT A GIRL, and GO FOR THE FUCKING KILL!!
I broke so many tenants of game with this chick, and while I typed out this entire story, I'm really not that broken up about it, just a bit miffed, and to be perfectly honest I feel kind of downtrodden.
It just seems like every time I try to step my game up and go for top tier 8+ level women, I end up getting the run around, and have them either out right flake, or try to play me like a puppet on a string.
I'm going to text my other prospects tonight, but unfortunately, my confidence in them coming through is low. However, this is all I can do, I'm not a male 10, I'm not a rich guy, I'm not a celebrity, all I can do is slog through the trenches, and keep getting cut down, and standing back up, keep trying to "keep my chin up." Hopefully, one day I will be rewarded for my effort, but till them I continue to struggle.
One of these "dogmas" of the game that I have found to be true, is "catching feelings" or getting your hopes up, or building a girl up in your mind before you've even had sex with her. This is something that I used to do all the time back in the day, in my pregame and early game years, and it's something that I sometimes still have to conciously work hard to repress doing.
Often times I meet a girl, usually a really beautiful girl, that I am really attracted to and seemingly has all the qualities that I desire, and inadvertently or inevitably I "catch feelings" for her on some level. Now usually this is due to us seeming to "hit it off" right from the get to, things seem to really fall into place, she appears to be really into me and the prospects of us making sweet love together and spending bunches or time together looks great...
Then like I said before we haven't even had sex I start to build up these grand scenarios into my mind about how things are going to be so great together, the great sex we'll have, the time spent enjoying each others company, going to the beach, going out for sushi and cocktails, etc. etc. The time we spend falling for each other.
But... In reality the little fantasy that I play out in my mind usually falls flat like a house of cards toppling over from a swift breeze.
Case in point, this is where the post may take a beta turn and I may delve into a lame story full of an overly detailed account, but I will try to keep it as concise as possible.
So I met this girl at the bar a little over a week ago, it was not this past Thursday, but the Thursday of last week, which is "college night" at the local bars and the best night of the week to go out and meet cute college girls.
This girl caught my eye immediately, she was petite, had a nice lushious perky round booty, nice big round titties, a very pretty young innocent face, with green eyes and curly black hair. She said she was a quarter black, part native American, but mostly of Russian descent, I'd rate her a solid 8.
Any how my approach hooked immediately, we seemed to hit it off, the bar was packed and there were a bunch of guys trying to say hi and talk to her, but she ignored them all, only to stick by my side, talking to me the whole night.
She bounced to another bar with me and we pretty much spent the whole night hanging out till last call, she made many comments about how she was kind of a shy, nerdy girl, who doesn't like to go out and party a lot, and she really likes to take "things slow."
At the end of the night I asked for her number and she seemed really enthusiastic about hanging out, and asked me to text her on the spot so she had my number too and told me to hit her up. I went for the kiss, but she turned her head to the side, seeming kind of self concious about kissing a guy at the bar, which I thought was lame, but I respected.
She was the only girl I stepped to and macked on that night, and we literally spent 3 hours hanging out at the bar talking that night, so I thought the outlook looked pretty good with her.
Then I did my standard, wait 3 days to send a text gambit, and sent her a text Sunday night, which she did not reply to. I basically at that point wrote her off and said she's a flake and not very interested, so I considered it a "dead prospect."
I went out again this past Thursday and ran into her again with a couple friends, this time she approached me and started talking, apologizing for not getting back to me, claiming she was in the bay area (which I call bullshit on), and told me to hit her up again. I took that as a good sign and figured that she was back "into play" and that I'd hit her up again at the end of the weekend.
Okay so I went out to the bar last night with a bro, and saw her holding some guys hand and walking out of the bar with him. Admittedly I was like "what the fuck", that's whack, I was mildly jealous and was seriously like "that guy", dude looked lame and certainly not as attractive as me.
Then my friend and I bounced to another bar, where she was at with that guy, plus a fat ugly friend, and another dude. It was pretty obvious that both guys were pining over her, and were just hanging out with the ugly friend by default.
Anyhow, decided to ignore her, but at some point not knowing where she was or really caring, I step out front to get some air and maybe see if there are any girls out front to spit to. Lo and behold the cute shorty is just chilling out front and we start talking, when she become very flirtatious and I proceed to hug her, and escalate "kino" as the PUAs would say.
We go back into the bar and I say "let me get you a drink", she's chilling at the bar with me, being super flirty and touchy feely, her "friends" are sitting in a booth directly across from us and the guys are basically starring me down with the evil eye.
It's getting close to last call, and one of the guys comes up and start talking to her, she then steps aside with him, and he's obviously not amused, he was the guy she was holding hands with at the other bar earlier.
After they talk for a couple minutes she comes back over to the bar where I'm chilling on a stool and starts talking to me agin like nothing happened. The bartender calls last call and her group comes and tries to make one last attempt to cockblock me and convince her to leave with them. She says she wants to stay and finish her drink and that she'll walk home.
Well I've been in the game for a minute so I knew this was a good sign, that fact that she was willing to ignore and ditch her cockblocking friends was a greenlight for me.
After we got kicked out of the bar, I told her I'd give her a ride home and she complied, when we got to her place she invited me into her place, but went on about how she "just wanted to chill and that I shouldn't expect anything, because she won't have sex with me." I've heard it all before and I know usually it's just their "anti slut defense" so that they don't look like a slut, when they really want the dick.
Anyway when we're in her place she starts acting kind of weird, alternating between telling me how she thinks I'm so cool, and how she want to hang out in the future, but then suddenly acting withdrawn, and unresponsive. We cracked some beers and watched Wilfred on netflix, I was kind of cuddling her and rubbing her thigh, kissing her neck, and putting my tongue in her ear, which she appeared to enjoy.
But everytime I went for the kiss she tried to avoid it and turning her head, and saying "no sorry, nothing is going to happen". Eventually I kept trying and went kind of "caveman" and grabbed her head to kiss her. She didn't resist that time, and we made out for a bit. However, we'd kiss for like 10 seconds then when I'd slip in toungue, she'd pull back and keep asserting that, that was it and she wasn't down for any more.
Really looking back now in retrospect I should have gone even more caveman and trying to suck her tits, finger her pussy, pull my dick out, just escalate it to that next level and try to push through her last minute resistance to try and make her horny enough to break down and give me the pussy.
However, she had planted the seed in my mind that she's a "good girl", doesn't like to "move too fast", and that she's "shy and innocent", all of which is probably just an absolute pile of horse shit.
Anyways after we make out for a bit, she asks me to leave because it's 3 AM and she's tired, and me trying to be a "respectful" nice guy, I oblige. However before I leave she's all acting all sprung on me, being like "we got to hang out soon, I had such a great night", blah, blah, blah. She tries to act all concerned for me, saying that she really wants me to text her when I get home to make sure I get home okay, and whatnot.
All systems appeared to be a go in my mind, although I didn't end up getting the "notch." I thought she's a nice girl, I got to take a different angle with her, she really seems into me, and she's most likely going to end up being girlfriend material.
I text her when I get home and she replies immediately, wishing me a good night, I'm lying in bed feeling really "high" off this girl, when my thoughts begin to slip into the realm of fantasy. I'm thinking about how I'm going to make sweet love to this nice innocent girl, how were going to fall for each other, she's going to on my arm, and I'm going to introduce her to everyone as my girlfriend. We are going to be so happy together, I will go on road trips with her down the Cali. coast and if things really work out maybe a romantic trip to Baja or Hawaii.
Mind you this is all after one night of hanging out with her and a make out session, these thoughts really aren't warranted at all, but based on my interaction and everything she was telling me it seemed golden. I got 3 other girls number on this past Thursday that I was going to text tonight, but as I lay in bed trying to sleep thinking about this girl, I was like forget those other girls I'm not going to even bother with them.
I had more or less made soft plans to go get sushi with this girl early this week, and the thought of me trying to schedule dates with other girls either a day before or day after, actually made me feel kind of bad, as retarded as that sounds as I type this.
Then this morning she sends me a text at 9 AM, simply saying "thanks for the ride home last night". I take that as a good sign that she's thinking about me. I was trying to snooze since I barely got any decent sleep so I waited an hour and a half, and replied with this: "For sure, no problem. It was nice hanging out with u, we should do it again sometime soon."
She replies about a half hour later with this: "Thanks I really had a good time too, but to be honest there is another guy that I'm into, and I want to bet on that. Sorry."
I got to admit it was kind of a punch in the gut, because that was pretty much the last thing I was expecting. But I am a naive fool for thinking that.
To me there are a few solid lessons to come out of this, NEVER PUT THE GIRL ON THE PEDESTAL, NEVER FANTASY OR GET ALL DREAMY ABOUT A GIRL, and GO FOR THE FUCKING KILL!!
I broke so many tenants of game with this chick, and while I typed out this entire story, I'm really not that broken up about it, just a bit miffed, and to be perfectly honest I feel kind of downtrodden.
It just seems like every time I try to step my game up and go for top tier 8+ level women, I end up getting the run around, and have them either out right flake, or try to play me like a puppet on a string.
I'm going to text my other prospects tonight, but unfortunately, my confidence in them coming through is low. However, this is all I can do, I'm not a male 10, I'm not a rich guy, I'm not a celebrity, all I can do is slog through the trenches, and keep getting cut down, and standing back up, keep trying to "keep my chin up." Hopefully, one day I will be rewarded for my effort, but till them I continue to struggle.
