[Melatonin]

Hi, I've been a long time lurker on the boards.

A lot has been written on the hypergamous nature of women, evolutionary psychology but there is a topic which is surprisingly rarely ever tackled and it is feelings.

Do you believe in love? Is it only a fleeting chemical reaction as it is often said: oxytocin and dopamine flooding the brain?

Should we oppose this emotion since it causes men to be needy and beta as a result?

Are modern relationships only about physical interactions?

How do you know they're reciprocated, that you found your soulmate without getting entrapped in the costly social institution of marriage?

I'm not exactly a hopeless romantic but at times chaining ONS or relationships based on provider game seems devoid of any emotional depth. Thanks for your insight.

[Veloce]

Here's the easiest way to break it down.

The Western concept of love is built out of attachment. The idea of finding "the one" and committing yourself to "the one". The problems with this concept of love are too numerous to get into.

In some Eastern concepts, love is reserved only for a more universal and benevolent love. There is a distinction between that universal love, and simply "liking" or "having affection" for someone.

What I consider love is a state that is attained. It's not an emotion to direct at someone. When I feel "in love", it's something that's completely on my end and has nothing to do with the person I'm with. When I was first "in love", I thought it was 100% because I found the right girl. That's why there's nothing like your first love; you had no precedent and you also had no explanation; none was needed. You could liken it to taking a child to Disneyland for the first time and telling them they could live there. They'd have no concept of entrance fees or paid employees or anything. Only by understanding the mechanics of Disneyland and the fact that it's a temporary experience would you burst their bubble.

Of course, now I've felt "in love" several times and know better. I feel it when I'm on psychedelics, on MDMA, I feel it while meditating, while looking at certain art pieces, observing certain things in nature. This is the love that philosophers speak of, of attaining "the state of being in love". It's a harmony of external and internal factors that produce a chemical release in the brain, stimulating feelings of euphoria, compassion, and connection. It's addicting, hence the attachment to love. It's a drug like anything else.

Love is real, but not in the way Hollywood or most of society would have you believe.

[Kingsley Davis]

Why did OP get banned?

http://heartiste.wordpress.com/2011/03/0...eta-males/