[Atlantic]

I am not a huge fan of Facebook for all the obvious reasons. Problem is I find it hard to keep in touch with people I know around the world without it.

Tonight I systematically deleted each friend, then changed my name and closed my account. This should stop me from using it again since it is usually so easy to just restart your account again once you shut it down.

So no more facebook and I don't want to use twitter or LinkedIn either. From now on what would people suggest to keep in touch with the people I meet and people I already know across the globe.

One idea I have is to have a travel/lifestyle website mostly for myself that people can check in on and send me messages from. Then I would reply via email.

For the people not using Facebook on here how do you keep in touch with the people you meet?

Are ye just using email or is there some slicker international playboy method I am not aware of?

Thanks

[RussianSoul]

Facebook? Email? You are so high-tech man. I write monthly letters to my far-away birds with beautiful 19th century penmanship. They fucking love it!.................In all seriousness, I haven't had a facebook in 3 years and its tough. Email communication lacks continuity so I prefer skype. It does seem there is a hole in the market for people who travel a lot.

[Atlantic]

(08-15-2013 05:51 AM)RussianSoul Wrote:  

It does seem there is a hole in the market for people who travel a lot.

I think so too.

A social website with no open post page, friend count or status updates. You could only receive private messages from contacts you know or how you gave your details to (like your email). Then you have a homepage with a short bio and one or two photos. Kind of like the format of a POF profile page but in a more social/lifestyle direction rather then dating.

[loki]

I have not had a spacebook account in 6 years now and do not miss it, I use email, SMS and skype plus as of last week I am now starting to also use Wechat!

http://wechat.com/en/

Asian chicks love wechat and its got good random pickup features to meet strangers with. Its a bit like WhatsAp...same shit different smell.

http://www.whatsapp.com/

They are the two big ones at the moment.

Check it out as you may well like them, hope this helps

[Genghis Khan]

Closed my facebook a year ago. Honestly I was worried as well that I would have a hard time staying in touch, but it's worked out great. I realized I don't really care about 90% of my 'friends' or their life filled with random shit. The few people I do care about, I've found email is a good way to stay in touch. Every now and then I also call some of them up.

The interesting thing is that I've noticed they appreciate the email/call more. I guess it makes sense if they have hundreds of
'friends' and you're one of the few that doesn't just like their posts or tweets.

[Sonsowey]

I've reopened my facebook account

I chitchat with more random "friends" who I haven't talked with in a long time, it's usually just like "Oh hey how have you been" type stuff.

I lived abroad without facebook, and honestly lost touch with all my friends. Gchat is probably the most popular online way to chat w people who just happen to be around. But besides that, not having Facebook basically just makes you live in reality and hang out with people in real life.

[Bolthouse]

Everyone outside of the US has whatsapp, and many people within the US have it too.

That should replace your facebook just fine.

[tiggaling]

Facebook isn't so much to do with your close friends anyway, but more to do with acquintances and not so close friends.

[Timoteo]

There's nothing wrong with Facebook for keeping in touch with internationals. I know fellas badmouth FB because it isn't conducive to banging chicks, but who ever said it was good for that anyway? Now, people seem more concerned about what others will think of them for being on FB. If YOU feel it's a good way to keep in touch, use it. I have a few women that I met on Tagged, and transitioned to FB. I have a couple on Whatsapp, and a couple others on BBM. A few of them I Skype with also. Use whatever method of communication that's out there, and use them in the way YOU want.

[RXB]

Text, email, stuff like that.

Also I sometimes know where people will be when.

I deleted my Facebook months ago and lost contact with some acquaintance type friends. I knew where they'd be, so I "accidentally" bumped into them there. We had a good time and I got their non FB contact information.

[JayJuanGee]

(08-18-2013 06:56 PM)Timoteo Wrote:  

There's nothing wrong with Facebook for keeping in touch with internationals. I know fellas badmouth FB because it isn't conducive to banging chicks, but who ever said it was good for that anyway? Now, people seem more concerned about what others will think of them for being on FB. If YOU feel it's a good way to keep in touch, use it. I have a few women that I met on Tagged, and transitioned to FB. I have a couple on Whatsapp, and a couple others on BBM. A few of them I Skype with also. Use whatever method of communication that's out there, and use them in the way YOU want.

For some time, I have been considering this topic about what to do with my facebook account when I start to embark upon more international travels (in the near future - maybe within six months or so). I agree with Timoteo that we should find the amount, type and intensity of the technological medium that works for us. I definitely like facebook for the ease of keeping up-to-date with a variety of friends, family and acquaintances. It is not somewhere where I would like to share too many personal details of myself, but once the account is established, it seems inevitable that some of the personal information is going to be shared through that medium.

I was kind of convinced by the idea that one should set up a second facebook account, just for the purposes of international travels - that would not be linkable to the regular facebook account with family and friends. I have not done this yet, and I am still considering how i would set up such a second account. I thought that maybe i would put up a few pictures and have a lot of privacy settings, and even say it is my travel account (leave a mystery whether I have any other account, or not).. and implement more privacy settings than my regular account.... maybe that would cause more problems b/c it seems almost like a second personality... who know? Maybe through that second account, I would not have very many friends, and it would look worse.... ? however, stating that it is a travel account, can help girls to understand, and you can also say that you are just starting the account for travel purposes...

I realize that Op, here, seems to be advocating no facebook, and other possible communication mechanisms, and I am interested in hearing about what others do about this too, even though I continue to think that a second facebook account could be a better way of dealing with some of the downfalls of using on facebook account that includes girls that may want to stalk you or cause chaos in your life....

[la_mode]

I really preferred the days of IM.

[Doc_J]

I have also moved away from facebook. To me it is a degrading picture of our self centered and attention whoring society.
I haven't deleted my account exactly for the reasons mentioned in this thread: long distance friends. I use the messaging functionality only since it seems to be the only way to keep in touch with some people.

However, sometimes I ask myself if this is really worth it. If people truly want to keep a connection with you there is always, phone, whatsapp, skype and email, if you only chat through facebook it's just more attention whoring again. So I am really thinking of simply deleting the account. It doesn't bring anything good to the table for your personal life.

Death to facebook.

[JayJuanGee]

(08-21-2013 04:56 AM)Doc_J Wrote:  

I have also moved away from facebook. To me it is a degrading picture of our self centered and attention whoring society.
I haven't deleted my account exactly for the reasons mentioned in this thread: long distance friends. I use the messaging functionality only since it seems to be the only way to keep in touch with some people.

However, sometimes I ask myself if this is really worth it. If people truly want to keep a connection with you there is always, phone, whatsapp, skype and email, if you only chat through facebook it's just more attention whoring again. So I am really thinking of simply deleting the account. It doesn't bring anything good to the table for your personal life.

Death to facebook.

Doc_J: Your criticism of FB mostly goes to the public aspect of it, and you can use FB without really using those public features.. or at least attempting to minimize your use or involvement in the public features of it, no?

[Dr. Howard]

I turned off facebook 2 or 3 years ago, it wasn't that I was worried about personal information it was that I would rage when I'd read people's status's and comments and wasted my free time trolling or having debates. I made a public post that I'm not using the account anymore and an email address of 'friends' to use if they wanted to find me.

I enjoy not having it, friends are more pleasantly surprised when I contact them and its more substantial conversation than a few lines of information. I've also found I have far fewer 'friends' and a bigger business network. I think facebook spread my 'real relationship' time to thin among too many people.

It was great for girls though, I'd date one roomate, add her other roomates, flirt a little in person and then keep the tension high via playful direct game messages, worked like a charm. Girls are terrible friends to each other.

[TopPanda]

Whatsapp is good for keeping in touch with home, and is way better than SMS.

LINE and Wechat are good for talking to girls. Wechat is popular in Asia. The downside is that it's easy for worlds to collide on there (i.e. girlfriends to see you have other girlfriends). Found a couple of great Bangkok girls on the Look Around function. And if for some reason you want to hookup with ladyboys then it's awesome.

I like LINE because it has a load of stickers you can include in conversations with chicks who don't speak that much English.

[liquiddrewl]

Congrats on quitting

[JayJuanGee]

(08-22-2013 09:29 PM)wiscanada Wrote:  

I turned off facebook 2 or 3 years ago, it wasn't that I was worried about personal information it was that I would rage when I'd read people's status's and comments and wasted my free time trolling or having debates. I made a public post that I'm not using the account anymore and an email address of 'friends' to use if they wanted to find me.

I enjoy not having it, friends are more pleasantly surprised when I contact them and its more substantial conversation than a few lines of information. I've also found I have far fewer 'friends' and a bigger business network. I think facebook spread my 'real relationship' time to thin among too many people.

It was great for girls though, I'd date one roomate, add her other roomates, flirt a little in person and then keep the tension high via playful direct game messages, worked like a charm. Girls are terrible friends to each other.

Wiscanada: I see your commentary about Facebook to be more of a criticism about how to use FB rather than FB being bad in and of itself.

In this regard, if we keep a FB account, we should aim to control FB, rather than having FB controlling us. Nonetheless, you chose to close your FB account, and surely that is a personal choice, and possibly in the end, you will be better off... it is a judgement call that can have varying results.

IMHO, We just have to decide how to use our FB accounts, to the extent that we have them, to our best advantage... and merely b/c a guy may have an account would not necessarily mean that he keeps all of his friends (or bangs) on FB. He need not even introduce certain friends to FB if he found it to be to his advantage to keep certain acquaintances, friends and/or bangs off of his FB friends' list.

In the next six months, I am definitely planning to establish a travellling FB to keep separate from my other identity(ies) I would be interested to hear if anyone else has gone down that road yet, of establishing a second FB account just to manage travel acquaintances?

[Dr. Howard]

(08-23-2013 01:00 AM)JayJuanGee Wrote:  

(08-22-2013 09:29 PM)wiscanada Wrote:  

I turned off facebook 2 or 3 years ago, it wasn't that I was worried about personal information it was that I would rage when I'd read people's status's and comments and wasted my free time trolling or having debates. I made a public post that I'm not using the account anymore and an email address of 'friends' to use if they wanted to find me.

I enjoy not having it, friends are more pleasantly surprised when I contact them and its more substantial conversation than a few lines of information. I've also found I have far fewer 'friends' and a bigger business network. I think facebook spread my 'real relationship' time to thin among too many people.

It was great for girls though, I'd date one roomate, add her other roomates, flirt a little in person and then keep the tension high via playful direct game messages, worked like a charm. Girls are terrible friends to each other.

Wiscanada: I see your commentary about Facebook to be more of a criticism about how to use FB rather than FB being bad in and of itself.

In this regard, if we keep a FB account, we should aim to control FB, rather than having FB controlling us. Nonetheless, you chose to close your FB account, and surely that is a personal choice, and possibly in the end, you will be better off... it is a judgement call that can have varying results.

IMHO, We just have to decide how to use our FB accounts, to the extent that we have them, to our best advantage... and merely b/c a guy may have an account would not necessarily mean that he keeps all of his friends (or bangs) on FB. He need not even introduce certain friends to FB if he found it to be to his advantage to keep certain acquaintances, friends and/or bangs off of his FB friends' list.

In the next six months, I am definitely planning to establish a travellling FB to keep separate from my other identity(ies) I would be interested to hear if anyone else has gone down that road yet, of establishing a second FB account just to manage travel acquaintances?

I agree, if you have the self discipline to manage your FB account then it can be a useful tool. I tried to manage it for about a year but found myself being drawn into the same crap and failing at it, so I closed it.

[Lisitshko]

I closed down my regular Facebook and opened a second account when I moved to another country. It makes sense, because it combines the best of both. You don't get bothered with bullshit from "home", like event invitations, photo tags, comments like "just drank a coffee, yummie". With your real friends you keep in touch with Skype and via Email.

The second account you use for staying in touch with random bar acquaintances, girls you want to hang out with, start poking friends of friends virtually and then in real life, check events you don't know about etc. Facebook can be a powerful tool if you move to another country, you can just deactivate it if you move again or send it to sleep until you return.

All the guys jabbering about them quitting is like those guys who can't handle social drinking or smoking only when out in bars. They can't control themselves, that's not Facebooks fault. Use the tool, don't be the tool.

[Jaylow]

I use Morse code.

[Bushido]

To answer your question, without Facebook you will struggle to keep in touch. I deleted it before and nobody could be arsed to give me their email addresses (I guess nobody uses email anymore!).

I now use my Facebook as a message center and nothing else. Here's how:

1. Unsubscribe from everyone on your Facebook. You don't need to actually delete them. Unsubscribing means that none of their stories will appear in your news feed.
2. Unlike all your liked pages to stop them sending you shit
3. Install F.B. Purity to block the ads and spammy events notifications
4. Delete the Facebook app from your phone. Replace it with the Facebook messenger app.
5. (optional) Get rid of all your personal data, change your name and delete photos of yourself if you are worried about the privacy side of things.

This is what my Facebook home page looks like:



As you can see there are no distracting stories and no mess. I can just check for messages from friends and occasionally perve over a hot girl or two. Works for me.

[Nascimento]

Change your last name to something different so that it doesn't resemble your real name.

Delete people you don't care about. This should be the majority of your friends list.

Make settings private so only friends can see your posts, pictures whatever. I have it set so that the only thing a lurker can see is my profile picture and where I'm from, that's it.

This way you can still maintain contact with people you care about. And you can still post things you want to share with them, without risk of having the public seeing what you post. If a girl looks me up she isn't able to see anything I have unless I accept her friend request (which I am not going to do). If she sends you a request she's probably wondering about you.

I usually message them back and try to set something up, without accepting their request. But Facebook doesn't work for me in that respect. Maybe in the future high school girls I knew might add me out of the blue or something and it might work then.

But in any case, the way I have it set up, Facebook isn't helping my game but it is not hurting it either. Before I've had girls lose interest just because of Facebook and I'm not about to have that happen again.

I still like having it though to maintain contact with people, you just have to calibrate it a little bit.

[JayJuanGee]

(11-12-2013 06:05 PM)Lisitshko Wrote:  

I closed down my regular Facebook and opened a second account when I moved to another country. It makes sense, because it combines the best of both. You don't get bothered with bullshit from "home", like event invitations, photo tags, comments like "just drank a coffee, yummie". With your real friends you keep in touch with Skype and via Email.

The second account you use for staying in touch with random bar acquaintances, girls you want to hang out with, start poking friends of friends virtually and then in real life, check events you don't know about etc. Facebook can be a powerful tool if you move to another country, you can just deactivate it if you move again or send it to sleep until you return.

All the guys jabbering about them quitting is like those guys who can't handle social drinking or smoking only when out in bars. They can't control themselves, that's not Facebooks fault. Use the tool, don't be the tool.

Lisitshko:

It seems like you are doing some variation of what i have been considering, which is to create some kind of a traveling FB account.

- However, I was thinking that I don't really need to delete my regular or my old FB account, and that regular FB account will be used for regular friends - I really do NOT get bothered by those kinds of solicitations.

On the other hand, if I were to create a traveling FB account, then that account would be geared towards adding friends that I meet in my travels and likely only strategically sharing some minimal personal information - at least they could NOT use it as a means to connect with my regular friends.

FB keeps changing its settings and its interface, yet it does seem necessary to have a few friends on there or maybe just when I would tell girls about my FB account serving as a traveling account - and the only one that I have.... something that the girls may accept and NOT be weirded out about.

[OSL]

Join Linkedin.

You'll have the benefit of connecting to useful/valuable people while not having to deal with all the drama, awkwardness, distractions, and riffraff that you'd otherwise have to face on Facebook.

I've never heard of anyone being busted, fired, arrested, or any sort of drama caused from Linkedin. I'm sure that that's happened in some way - particularly in terms of being fired - but I'm sure that it's way more common on FB.

Linkedin is FB for professionals without all the drama and distractions.