Quote: (07-11-2013 02:56 PM)DVY Wrote:
As for the 2nd part- milestones and insights.
1) Insight #1- People take time to get used to you
It take about 2-3 mins for people to feel you out. Sometimes those "on signals" you see means the girls has noticed you already and really liked you, or she has looked at you and grown to like you. Theres no real way of knowing or predicting it.
This is why I am a big advocate of making a slow, sweeping loop of a spot when I get there (excuse- I am going to the bathroom, if they ask). I walk slowly and try to make eye contact w/various girls that I like. Do this early before the drunkards start going.
I usually lightly touch base w/random girls if i see them "eye me back". Just a "hi, how are you...yada yada yada". Ill usually keep it short and let her and her group get used to me. "Hey, Ill catch up w/you later. I need hit the bathroom. Stop distracting me. Wink at the group/girl "
This lets you see the crowd and acclimate to the vibe of the spot. Don't be surprised if the crowd responds better your 2nd or 3rd lap.
2) Insight #2- Watch others carefully
Keep a firm lookout. Somebody elses failure can be your success. If you see somebody flame out spectacularly, you can rise like a phoenix from his ashes. Walk up and ask her, "Howd he do?" w/a light smirk. You should get a little laugh out of it. Its yours to run with now.
3) Insight #3- Wink at girls
Throw out little invitations for girls to respond. I wink at girls all the time, sometimes they ignore me, sometimes they stare back. For a 1/2 second motion, its a great return.
4) Insight #4- Cold Read
Sometimes Ill see a particularly striking girl and Ill wonder what nationality she is. I've gotten really good at this. Esp for large metropolitan cities, there a lot of mutts. I walk up to girls and say "hi. I was wondering.... what are you?" Usually girls will stutter and say "human" "a girl" or something snarky/shocked. But ill just level a steely smile. Girls crack in unfamiliar situations (ala AliB's reframe situation). In a scenario they aren't often used to= bitch-shields down +plausible deniability.
Even better if you nail her nationality on the head. Then flip the game, and have her guess where you are from. Speakeasy, I know you are black dude. Are you french creole mix w/others? Make it interesting.
Interesting+time invested= good chances of taking it further.
Theres tons more I've seen or done, but this should give you some thoughts.
I completely agree with this. In relation to point (4), a good tactic for foreigners is also to approach the surroundings of her group and pay attention to the language they speak.
Once I got it (the more exotic it is, the better, as long as you can detect it, or at least the region...). Then I go somewhere else where I can watch them discretely, and wait until the girls' conversation (better if they are two or three) is not in a high note. If they are really having a blast together, I might try myr luck but usually the chances of success are not so high.
So when they take a pause in the conversation, I lurk (sometimes with a wing) and say "hey girls, sorry to interrupt you, I was just wondering if you would be from [country]?" Usually the reaction is either mildly or very friendly, but it's very rare that the group shuts you off. From here on it's easy to build up, e.g. "Ah, there's been some time since I don't see someone from [country]. Last time was when I was, bla, bla, bla", and then the usual routine...
Basically, from a situation of indifference, this is one of million ways where you can start building raport quickly. "Plausible deniability" is really a great concept in these situations....
Or as they say in the cinema, the "suspension of desbelief"