00 Approach Study: Exeter
08-08-2013, 03:46 PM
I really think that being outgoing/ confident and engaging is a skill that needs to be used or it will regress. I've spent way too long cooped up at home. On thursday I went to a pool party and then Friday chilled with my friends, but since then (until yesterday) I'd just stayed at home for the most part. I have a lot of free weights at home (squat rack, preacher curl, barbells, dumbbells, plates, leg machines, benches) which I got off ebay, so I dont need to leave the house to work off and apart from going to MMA I hadn't left the house for five days. I guess that it was because although confident and loud normally, I am introverted enough to enjoy my own (and my brother's) company and not really get bored at home. Coupled with the lack of parties and the fact that I can't go clubbing yet, I had no reason to go out.
Yesterday when I went into town to get a haircut, I realised how bad this idea is. I was mumbling and not making strong eye contact, etc. However, bantering with my hairdresser helped me warm up and up my game. I then ran into some girls I'm friends with from school and this also helped me to recover from my solitude. So I ended up doing one approach yesterday:
1. I was on the green and saw a girl on her own looking bored. She was pretty hot, and looked like she put effort into her appearance, maybe a 7. I opened with, "hey do you a good place to go for a haircut?". I wasn't sure whether or not to say that I'm from out of town, and in the end I decided to say that I had just moved from a town about an hour away. My justification was going to be that because I have very thick hair my haircuts always come out badly. When I first opened, she seemed quite surprised, and laughed/ giggled. She said that she may not be the best person to ask about boy's haircuts, but that her brother got haircuts from x. In reply I laughed and said that I asked her because she was the only normal person I could see on the green (there were a lot of professionals on their lunch break, and a bunch of hipsters). She laughed and said "Haha what's wrong with them", and pointed to a group of likely gay hipster guys with some really skinny girls. I thought that this could be a shit test and smirked, not replying. Then I introduced myself by saying "I'm Cyr by the way" and she told me her name. I explained how I'd just moved to Exeter and was surprised at how different it was from the city I'd moved from. She talked about how much she hated Exeter and how the city I'd moved from was really nice. I laughed and said that I thought the opposite. At this point I was hoping to move the conversation away from banalities and try to start gaming her. As soon as I said that I thought Exeter was nice, I said "well I'm sorry to ditch you but I've got to go get my haircut so that I can get home and help my parent's unpack. Are you going to Boardmasters (a festival I'm going to tomorrow) by any chance?". Unfortunately she said no. I then said, "all well, it was nice speaking to you", acting as though I was about to leave. Then as an afterthought I said "Actually text me and maybe we can meet up after that. It'd be nice to get to know people and you could see how you're haircut recommendation went". I said the last sentence whilst maintaining strong eye contact and a smirk, hoping to move any potential meeting out of the friend-zone. She said "haha, yeah ok do you want my number then?", to which I replied by nodding and passing her my phone. After that I smiled, said see you soon, and left.
Looking back on it, that was probably my best approach I've done so far, because I got a number, and she seemed quite interested. I probably should have pushed for an insta-date though, as I had nothing to do. Strangely it seems as though after initially pushing away my nerves and going for an approach, I get more nervous as the conversation goes on and end up ejecting perhaps prematurely. This did show me the importance of warming up before though, especially for lower level guys. If I hadn't already done a lot of social interaction that day and practised small talk with girls I knew in a lower risk environment, I wouldn't have done well.
This weekend I'm going to a music festival where I'm hoping to get laid. I'm there for two nights and will just do a ton of approaches until one of them clicks. Moving forward I'm going to try to get of the house for at least a few hours every day so that I can keep improving my game skills.
Yesterday when I went into town to get a haircut, I realised how bad this idea is. I was mumbling and not making strong eye contact, etc. However, bantering with my hairdresser helped me warm up and up my game. I then ran into some girls I'm friends with from school and this also helped me to recover from my solitude. So I ended up doing one approach yesterday:
1. I was on the green and saw a girl on her own looking bored. She was pretty hot, and looked like she put effort into her appearance, maybe a 7. I opened with, "hey do you a good place to go for a haircut?". I wasn't sure whether or not to say that I'm from out of town, and in the end I decided to say that I had just moved from a town about an hour away. My justification was going to be that because I have very thick hair my haircuts always come out badly. When I first opened, she seemed quite surprised, and laughed/ giggled. She said that she may not be the best person to ask about boy's haircuts, but that her brother got haircuts from x. In reply I laughed and said that I asked her because she was the only normal person I could see on the green (there were a lot of professionals on their lunch break, and a bunch of hipsters). She laughed and said "Haha what's wrong with them", and pointed to a group of likely gay hipster guys with some really skinny girls. I thought that this could be a shit test and smirked, not replying. Then I introduced myself by saying "I'm Cyr by the way" and she told me her name. I explained how I'd just moved to Exeter and was surprised at how different it was from the city I'd moved from. She talked about how much she hated Exeter and how the city I'd moved from was really nice. I laughed and said that I thought the opposite. At this point I was hoping to move the conversation away from banalities and try to start gaming her. As soon as I said that I thought Exeter was nice, I said "well I'm sorry to ditch you but I've got to go get my haircut so that I can get home and help my parent's unpack. Are you going to Boardmasters (a festival I'm going to tomorrow) by any chance?". Unfortunately she said no. I then said, "all well, it was nice speaking to you", acting as though I was about to leave. Then as an afterthought I said "Actually text me and maybe we can meet up after that. It'd be nice to get to know people and you could see how you're haircut recommendation went". I said the last sentence whilst maintaining strong eye contact and a smirk, hoping to move any potential meeting out of the friend-zone. She said "haha, yeah ok do you want my number then?", to which I replied by nodding and passing her my phone. After that I smiled, said see you soon, and left.
Looking back on it, that was probably my best approach I've done so far, because I got a number, and she seemed quite interested. I probably should have pushed for an insta-date though, as I had nothing to do. Strangely it seems as though after initially pushing away my nerves and going for an approach, I get more nervous as the conversation goes on and end up ejecting perhaps prematurely. This did show me the importance of warming up before though, especially for lower level guys. If I hadn't already done a lot of social interaction that day and practised small talk with girls I knew in a lower risk environment, I wouldn't have done well.
This weekend I'm going to a music festival where I'm hoping to get laid. I'm there for two nights and will just do a ton of approaches until one of them clicks. Moving forward I'm going to try to get of the house for at least a few hours every day so that I can keep improving my game skills.