Hey so I'm not exactly new to game but I'm in the middle of a way too long dry spell that coincided w/ a breakup with a 3 yr stripper girlfriend wherein I slowly turned back into a beta.
That relationship started when I was in college. Back then girls my age were everywhere and it was very easy to have an abundance mentality. I never approached girls back then either, but I'd run into them in so many different scenarios that it wasn't necessary.
Now I'm a few years out of college and do not have the same capacity to just run into girls at different places at different random times so I don't see how to get out of this rut without beginning to approach.
Here's my issue with it ....
I feel as if anytime I go up to a girl and initiate a conversation that I am giving away my power. The implications make me feel as if I have to be the one working to get her interested and the idea that she potentially might not even want to talk to me creeps into my head--I start second guessing the things I do and am not able to portray my otherwise super confident attitude. These issues don't come up when I can frame the situation such that she is the one who keeps managing to run into me and come up w/ reasons to talk to me.
I do okay with observational openers that are indirect based on something happening around us, but those are oftentimes difficult to come up with and execute well. Even then, conversations don't tend to last particularly long.
How do I get around these issues I have? How can I find ways to frame the situation such that I have higher value than her and that she should be putting in the work to get to know me?
Thanks.
That relationship started when I was in college. Back then girls my age were everywhere and it was very easy to have an abundance mentality. I never approached girls back then either, but I'd run into them in so many different scenarios that it wasn't necessary.
Now I'm a few years out of college and do not have the same capacity to just run into girls at different places at different random times so I don't see how to get out of this rut without beginning to approach.
Here's my issue with it ....
I feel as if anytime I go up to a girl and initiate a conversation that I am giving away my power. The implications make me feel as if I have to be the one working to get her interested and the idea that she potentially might not even want to talk to me creeps into my head--I start second guessing the things I do and am not able to portray my otherwise super confident attitude. These issues don't come up when I can frame the situation such that she is the one who keeps managing to run into me and come up w/ reasons to talk to me.
I do okay with observational openers that are indirect based on something happening around us, but those are oftentimes difficult to come up with and execute well. Even then, conversations don't tend to last particularly long.
How do I get around these issues I have? How can I find ways to frame the situation such that I have higher value than her and that she should be putting in the work to get to know me?
Thanks.