[Shamus]

I got a girls number, waited a day to text her. She replied in under 10 min to my texts. She was helpful in suggesting a date to meet up. I waited until the day to meet to tell her where w were going like it said to in bang. Again she was responsive within 10 min and we arraigned the date where she said "I'll see you there". Then two hours later she sends a rambling apology about how she can't make it because her brother just got in a car wreck and she has to visit him in the hospital. She does ask to reschedule, but doesn't suggest a day in particular. I told her that i hoped her brother was ok and to tell me when she was free.

What should i do? Just write it off as a flake our send a restart text in a few days?

Thanks

[Alpha Hunter Zero]

You should have asked what hospital the brother was in so you could stop by for a quick visit and give your sympathies. That would have done one of two things. The first would be in the event she was lying she would start coming up with random bullshit excuses for you not to go thus rendering her a true flake and as a result deleting her number. The second would be if she was telling the truth and genuinely likes you she would most likely tell you the hospital so you could see for yourself. If she told you the hospital but told you not to visit then something's not right. Regardless never let a flaker get away so easily.

[Blackhawk]

Once I had a first date and she dropped me saying her half-sister had died.

She really had.

We connected two months later, after she was out of the deepest mourning.

Just be prepared to put this one on the backburner with a longer trajectory until you meet. She's going to be distracted by family issues in the immediate future.

[bojangles]

Sometimes it's not really a flake and something has happened, if your game was tight, flaking is rare and from what you're saying she was well into your interactions, so I can understand your pessimism regarding her excuse but it seems unlikely she's lying. I'd go with Blackhawk on this.

[j r]

(11-06-2012 06:43 PM)Alpha Hunter Zero Wrote:  

You should have asked what hospital the brother was in so you could stop by for a quick visit and give your sympathies. That would have done one of two things. The first would be in the event she was lying she would start coming up with random bullshit excuses for you not to go thus rendering her a true flake and as a result deleting her number. The second would be if she was telling the truth and genuinely likes you she would most likely tell you the hospital so you could see for yourself. If she told you the hospital but told you not to visit then something's not right. Regardless never let a flaker get away so easily.

This is the most absurd advice I've ever read. What hospital is the brother in? Why would you be going to the hospital to visit the brother of some chick you don't even know and haven't even been on one date with? All that question does is label you a thirsty, suspicious dude.

Let's say I got the phone number of the hottest chick in the world and had to cancel our date at the last minute because my brother was in the hospital. If she asked me what hospital, I'd think she was a psycho. And I'm a man, so a woman's interpretation of this is going to be 10 times worse.

If she made this up, that means she's either really not interested and a bit of a sociopath. You're not going to get anywhere by questioning her on this. Assume it's legit and be ready to write it off if it's not.

[XXL]

say it's fine and reschedule offering specific day

[Alpha Hunter Zero]

@j r- I respect your opinion but based exactly on what shamus wrote no one can surmise whether he had just met the girl or had any prior affiliations. In respect to my response I have used that method twice so far on 2 different women (after all how common is it that a girl uses the I have such and such in hospital excuse) to moderate success. Once was a lie. She said friend was in hospital, sustained serious injuries bla bla. I asked which hospital, she told me, i asked if I could stop by since I was close anyway. She said thanks but not to bother because friend was gonna be discharged next day. Obvious lie and flake. Second occurance happened on day of date- this time it was cousin in peds icu. She said sorry but wasnt going to be able to make it. Told her I was sorry and asked what hospital. She told me and asked if I wanted to stop by. Told her I had some things to take care of first but would stop by later on. I show up, she gives me a kiss and hug and thanks me for coming. We have a mini date in cafe.

[Alpha Hunter Zero]

So obviously the second occurance wasnt a flake. This method is obviously going to more likely come across weirdly to girls who who barely know you. I dont know about your community, current setting, and game type but it seems like we both have different styles approaching women.

[BlurredSevens]

Sometimes shit happens to people. Unless this girl is a terrible person, she's probably not lying about a family member being in a car accident.

Just play it cool, give girls the benefit of the doubt, and try again in a couple days. Remember: you're not overly concerned about her flaking because you have a lot of options. And if you don't have a lot of options right now, then just fake it till you make it.

[lush1]

I think its 99% certain she's lying, I've had a girl say the same shit to me, but she said her sister was killed in a car crash and she had to drive 1000 miles to ID the body(!).There is a flake thread on here somewhere where the 'family members been in a car accident' excuse comes up repeatedly.

[Shamus]

She replied to the restart text, but then stopped replying when I suggested meeting up. Whether it was a true story or flake, same result.

So the "family member car accident" flake may live on.

On to the next girl then.

[Gemini]

Any chick that uses "family member hurt or killed in a car crash" story is just fucked up evil and deserves bad karma. Who would lie about shit like that. Just say you have to take care of smth.... blah blah if you wanna lie.

[jerome]

blame it on the game....

it was not meant to be, we all been there, if she wanted to see you, she would of....that is all that matters.

The truth hurts, she doesn't want to hang out with you.

The excuse she gave was over the top.....even if it was real, that is some shitty luck you ran into, when shit happens you can't do anything, but move on.

Also getting dates with chick is suppose to be easy...if it is not, than there is something wrong or something you can't control. I think this chick is a socialpath, let her go and realize you save alot of time.


Also, all you can do is walk away and focus on some other girl, instead of figuring out something, you did nothen wrong.

[InternationPlayboy]

(11-06-2012 12:19 PM)Shamus Wrote:  

I got a girls number, waited a day to text her. She replied in under 10 min to my texts. She was helpful in suggesting a date to meet up. I waited until the day to meet to tell her where w were going like it said to in bang. Again she was responsive within 10 min and we arraigned the date where she said "I'll see you there". Then two hours later she sends a rambling apology about how she can't make it because her brother just got in a car wreck and she has to visit him in the hospital. She does ask to reschedule, but doesn't suggest a day in particular. I told her that i hoped her brother was ok and to tell me when she was free.

What should i do? Just write it off as a flake our send a restart text in a few days?

Thanks

Are you in Colombia? The excuses girls with come up with here. A girl told my room mate that her uncle was in the hospital because of a stroke and the next day he died! Pretty extreme shit.

[HotLava]

(11-07-2012 07:29 AM)XXL Wrote:  

say it's fine and reschedule offering specific day

^^ Yes, play it cool and aloof. Don't get complicated or dramatic.