[TheMan]

1) Sorry for posting this here [and not in the beginner's forum], but I think that the best solution to this would come from the big guys on the forum
2) also sorry for the length of the post but this all just happened so I'm still kinda fucking pissed. I've made a Too long; didn't read for you but if you feel like braving the details they're just below it.

TL;DR So I've realized that my feminized beta-herb of a flatmate has discovered that I'm using OkC and has told my main. I'm not afraid to lose her but obviously would prefer not to AND being a recovering social moron, in a world that is fast filling up with cunts like this, I could definitely do with the lesson on how to handle this type situation. Any tips or feed back would be appreciated.



My Flatmate is a White-Knighting Beta Slimeball
by TheMan

Recently my main has been ...acting strangely.

1. baselessly, claiming sudden strange behavior on my part over recent weeks
2. dropping random comments like "if you don't want to be with me then go, don't stay just cause you feel you have to" OR "don't lie to me, [my ex] used to lie to me all the time"
3. and just an above average (for her) sense of insecurity. (interesting side note, that I find her heightened insecurity, a bit on the irritating side. Probably how chicks feel when your inner game is weak sauce around them)
4. and this morning she [seemingly out of nowhere] brings up the old eastern European dating site (and she emphasized this next bit) that she used to use but has since deactivated
   

Now so that you understand the context, this is my main spinning plate, my slow orbiting planet OR whatever metaphor you want to use for it.

She has been my main for going on 2 and a half, 3 years and things are [were?] incredibly stable.

I was traveling the world seeing all kinds of action at home and away. Stable.
Other plates, planets, whatever, came and went. Stable.
I keep her wondering but never too much. Stable.
Game is so tight, that I can nerd the fuck out with her. STABLE.

This girl is sweet and feminine [see complimentary to masculine feminine girl game], loving [see, passionate and attentive and does my housework for me and irons my shirts when she sleeps over], decent [is the one that my mother knows about] and stays that way with me because I keep my game with her pretty, damn, tight.

So this evening I'm sitting at my kitchen shotgun mailing some lizards on OkC (I use it as a supplement) and my flatmate is putting about the kitchen making his dinner. Our kitchen table is right by the drawer with the cutlery and the way that it is means that there is just enough room for someome to sit at that side of the table comfortably while leaving enough room for someone to lean in, open the drawer and retrieve cutlery.

Now I'm no idiot, I know this chump is the kind of spineless beta-herb castrato, that would undoubtedly make trouble for your protagonist if I didn't make efforts to hide what I was up from his, inquisitive peripheral vision when he was in close proximity. So I had reddit up and opened a few tabs from it and would quickly bounce back there when he would come by. I assumed that the different tabs were enough, so that if he glanced at my screen the sight of some stupid /r/clopclop pablum would be enough for his brain to think oh nothing here and continue on his way.This was a miscalculation on my part, I recognize that now. I turned and caught him squinting at the tabs bar, I intercepted his gaze and stared him down till he slunk off to his room.

It then hit me, over the past few weeks, he and his ever-growing westernized-femicunt-nightmare-heffer (she is 2x wider than his scrawny frame, yet busts his balls about adding extra cheese on his sandwiches or tells him that he's really skinny and talks about celebs she wants to shag OR barks at him to not forget to fill and carry her water for her to his room THAT THEY ARE BOTH ON THEIR WAY TO), have been dropping all kinds of stupid, out of context comments towards me about cheaters and how they should be caught and taught lessons.

[by the way, is this an English thing: not saying what you have to say [by confronting a person], but instead just smarmily dropping comments from behind the safety of the plausible deny-ability bush and then staring like a cunt for a bit just to make sure the person gets, that they're a pussy, but not too pussy so as not to strongly hint at whatever it is?!]

I also got a weird first message yesterday, from this obviously fake girl profile...


So there it is... I've realized that my feminized beta-herb of a flatmate has discovered that I'm using OkC and has told my main. I'm not afraid to lose her but would prefer not to AND being a recovering social moron, in a world that is fast filling up with cunts like this, I could definitely do with the lesson on how to handle this type situation. Any tips or feed back would be appreciated.

[iknowexactly]

Just some speculation:

You are afraid to lose her, or wouldn't ask about it.

I think that there's an element of her sooner or later finding out you aren't really that into her, that you need other chicks. I think women sort of hope they can tame the wild guy, thus proving her strength. I've had it happen that they drop hints about marriage, saw I didn't bite, and started to phase me out.

After a few years, especially if she's late 20's or older, she just wants more emotionally than the clever good lay who isn't quite really there, even though he's handsome etc.

She senses you're not marrying her, maybe you recoil in horror about the subject of kids... I don't think it's this one thing--the dating site stuff--, I think it the whole flavor of the relationship not passing the smell test with her anymore.

Also, more beta guys are probably kissing her ass and she's reassessing her potential market value, hoping for a guy who wants an deeper, more honest relationship.

Women are very, very dumb; but given enough time, some percentage can figure out they're not getting what they want emotionally.

[kinjutsu]

Get a new flat mate. Cut her off as well. Find new people to chill with that aren't looking to fuck you over.

[WesternCancer]

I got all paranoid about this too when I creeped on a good friend of my main girl. She came up to me at a party and asked why I was online dating. I just looked at her and asked how much she'd had to drink. What I would do is clean up any incriminating evidence. Delete texts, emails. Deactivate your account after taking down your pictures and making sure only other OKC members can see your page. Same with any other online dating. After that act like nothing has happened. Your girl won't have the balls to ask and if she does act confused and say maybe someone was impersonating you and ask her to show you the profile. If she doesn't even have a username you're 100% in the clear.

As for your roommate and his she-beast I don't have much in the way of direct retaliation. Find an excuse to move out or cut him out of your life. You could frame him for cheating or sway his girl the other way (get another game aware guy to hit on her at a bar or something and makeout), but really I think no response is best. With no trace of an account he has nothing and no one has said anything.

[Duke Castile]

Tell your main you were on it before you met her and nothing ever came of it but you did meet some people on there that you keep up with the same way as on any other social networking site. Nonchalantly blow it off. Then go and grab your flatmate by his collar and tell him to mind his own goddamn business.

[Nineteen84]

That's some lame flatmate you've got.

As an experiment say nothing but reply to the OKC message - something along the lines of 'sorry but ive got a gf now, just logged in here to clean my account out. best of luck'. Watch them squirm.

[TheMan]

(10-01-2012 11:35 PM)iknowexactly Wrote:  

You are afraid to lose her, or wouldn't ask about it.

Na. Its more like how you don't necessarily wanna get into a fist-fight but if it happens it happens.

(10-01-2012 11:35 PM)iknowexactly Wrote:  

I think that there's an element of her sooner or later finding out you aren't really that into her, that you need other chicks. I think women sort of hope they can tame the wild guy, thus proving her strength. I've had it happen that they drop hints about marriage, saw I didn't bite, and started to phase me out.

After a few years, especially if she's late 20's or older, she just wants more emotionally than the clever good lay who isn't quite really there, even though he's handsome etc.

She senses you're not marrying her, maybe you recoil in horror about the subject of kids... I don't think it's this one thing--the dating site stuff--, I think it the whole flavor of the relationship not passing the smell test with her anymore.

Also, more beta guys are probably kissing her ass and she's reassessing her potential market value, hoping for a guy who wants an deeper, more honest relationship.

Women are very, very dumb; but given enough time, some percentage can figure out they're not getting what they want emotionally.

Erm.. No.

1. I'm not an expert by any stretch of the imagination but [and please correct me if I'm wrong] what makes a main, your main is not you saying "gorsh, dumplin' you're my main squeeze" but treating her like your long term monogamous girl. I've made sure that she's well nourished there (see OP message about stability)
2. I'm not for it either but SHE really hates the idea of having kids especially the part where (and I'm paraphrasing now) "she gets pregnant and ruins her body"
3. Beta's?! haha this has probably been the biggest boon to our relationship and one of the bigger attributes to my success with her. a) I stole her from a beta b) betas hit on her all the time hell alphas hit on her all the time, but for some reason they don't even bother me and as you know when it comes to girls, that is just so much win.
   

ALSO I'm the farthest thing from one of those traitorous-chemically neutered-femicunt sympathizing-androgynous-mangina-retards, that would trade their left nut for a pat on the head from the nearest she-beast-battle troll's hoof. But to say "women are very very dumb" only hurts you brother. a) you'll under estimate them b) you'll become jaded
They aren't necessarily stupid just very self serving and this blinds them most of the time. Know this and use it

[TheMan]

(10-01-2012 11:39 PM)kinjutsu Wrote:  

Get a new flat mate. Cut her off as well. Find new people to chill with that aren't looking to fuck you over.

May do with the Fag-mate but was there something I missed in the situations about her, that I should be wary of?

[TheMan]

(10-02-2012 12:33 AM)Fisto Wrote:  

Tell your main you were on it before you met her and nothing ever came of it but you did meet some people on there that you keep up with the same way as on any other social networking site. Nonchalantly blow it off. Then go and grab your flatmate by his collar and tell him to mind his own goddamn business.

read that ;ast bit in Wolverine's voice

but seriously good tips

[j r]

Your best move might be the pre-emptive breakup. Hard to say without knowing more, though.

Also, if you think your girlfriend is trying to trick you online, you should just troll her first.

[TheMan]

(10-01-2012 11:41 PM)WesternCancer Wrote:  

I got all paranoid about this too when I creeped on a good friend of my main girl. She came up to me at a party and asked why I was online dating. I just looked at her and asked how much she'd had to drink. What I would do is clean up any incriminating evidence. Delete texts, emails. Deactivate your account after taking down your pictures and making sure only other OKC members can see your page. Same with any other online dating. After that act like nothing has happened. Your girl won't have the balls to ask and if she does act confused and say maybe someone was impersonating you and ask her to show you the profile. If she doesn't even have a username you're 100% in the clear.

Thanks. I think I now have my game plan.

Here sir, have an up vote

[TheMan]

(10-02-2012 06:07 AM)j r Wrote:  

Your best move might be the pre-emptive breakup. Hard to say without knowing more, though.

Also, if you think your girlfriend is trying to trick you online, you should just troll her first.

I don't think she's trying to trick me....
I'm not 100% that its related, just creepy that it showed up in the middle of all this.

Here take a look at the profile http://www.okcupid.com/profile/kate4man

[Samseau]

Here's what I would do.

1. Tell your girl that you'll delete your OKC account. Delete it with her.

2. Make a new one with a different screen name the next day.

3. Stop talking to your roommate, and tell him to mind his fucking business.

[el mechanico]

Grab the dude by his hair and squeeze his cheeks and put him down. Then get on top of him and put your face right in his and say..If you talk shit about me one more time you're going to the hospital. Ok! Tell your girl that you were looking at profiles that your buddies were sending of girls they were trying to date. Delete Ok cupid for now and make a hidden pof profile. Next get rid of the dude and live alone!!!!!

[TheMan]

(10-02-2012 07:18 AM)Samseau Wrote:  

Here's what I would do.

1. Tell your girl that you'll delete your OKC account. Delete it with her.

2. Make a new one with a different screen name the next day.

3. Stop talking to your roommate, and tell him to mind his fucking business.

See, this is why I posted in the main and not the beginner forum.
Thanks

[TheMan]

(10-02-2012 09:26 AM)el mechanico Wrote:  

Grab the dude by his hair and squeeze his cheeks and put him down. Then get on top of him and put your face right in his and say..If you talk shit about me one more time you're going to the hospital. Ok! Tell your girl that you were looking at profiles that your buddies were sending of girls they were trying to date. Delete Ok cupid for now and make a hidden pof profile. Next get rid of the dude and live alone!!!!!

As much as I would REALLY REALLY like to do that, I can't (see reference my my OP to planet filling up with more and more of his ilk every day). This punk is guaranteed to go to the cops, which would only get me deported from Europe. There's no way in hell I'm going back to North America.

[damngringo]

I'm sure you can handle your main girl yourself, so if I were you I would be after the flatmate. Start subtly pissing him off and dropping hints about his relationships & girl. Being the loser-mangina and lacking confidence, he'll be more more worried abotu his life and less judgmental.

Hold your frame with the girl as if nothing happened, probably pull a little; nothing is wrong there. But the miserable fuck deserves to be punished.

[Tuthmosis]

   

[TheMan]

Despite living in one of the most expensive cities in the world for that. I think this situation has just made a point that I can't afford to ignore.

[Nineteen84]

(10-03-2012 03:52 PM)TheMan Wrote:  

Despite living in one of the most expensive cities in the world for that. I think this situation has just made a point that I can't afford to ignore.

so true. And drives home the point that this lifestyle is alien to most

[MikeCF]

(10-01-2012 11:03 PM)TheMan Wrote:  

So there it is... I've realized that my feminized beta-herb of a flatmate has discovered that I'm using OkC and has told my main. I'm not afraid to lose her but would prefer not to AND being a recovering social moron, in a world that is fast filling up with cunts like this, I could definitely do with the lesson on how to handle this type situation. Any tips or feed back would be appreciated.

You just started a panicked thread (complete with an exclamation point!) asking for help in saving a relationship....

Yes, you are afraid of losing her.

[TheMan]

(10-03-2012 05:34 PM)MikeCF Wrote:  

(10-01-2012 11:03 PM)TheMan Wrote:  

So there it is... I've realized that my feminized beta-herb of a flatmate has discovered that I'm using OkC and has told my main. I'm not afraid to lose her but would prefer not to AND being a recovering social moron, in a world that is fast filling up with cunts like this, I could definitely do with the lesson on how to handle this type situation. Any tips or feed back would be appreciated.

You just started a panicked thread (complete with an exclamation point!) asking for help in saving a relationship....

Yes, you are afraid of losing her.

I thought I was raging at the audacity if my loser flatmate and his pet war-pig's sticking of their respective face clit and snout, squarely into my business [ as away of lashing out at someone that represents the type of lifestyle they envy but don't want to work towards and / or threatens their world view... im guessing]. See my other posts where it is becomed obvious that both of these types of troglodyte are near the top of my pet peve list.

If anything (and I really feel like I'm stretching here) I might not wanna loose the first instance of me progressing this far (my goal in this whole game thing is to have 1 main 1 or 2 kinda mains and then a near constant stream of light flings. This instance is the closest I've come to that so far, since in plugging from the matrix)

But I wouldn't be a very good student if I kept dismissing the very opinions that I saught, especially when they are telling me what I don't want to hear.

So if you, the more experienced players say I'm oneitis-ing then I guess I am.
Taking that into consideration, this is a blessing in disguise and I know what to do.

1) make plans to move out ASAP
2) less focus on the main, more focus on the skills.

Thanks everyone, this has been way, more helpful,that I thought.
Glad I found this place.

TM

[iknowexactly]

You're in better shape than I thought if she's toeing the "I hate kids line."

Women who are consciously or unconsciously angling for the kid tend to attempt tighter and tighter control as a platform for their pregnancy/infant care.

If you can get your own place, or perhaps if that's impossible, a place with an older experienced ugly guy who knows how to mind own business, it might be worth it to hang onto her if you can.

Reliable sex makes for a much more confident and resilient player.

[xsplat]

I think the one-itis worry is unfounded. Nothing wrong with being into a girl and appreciating her. It's not like women are fungible - they aren't all the SAME. Some are better, some are worse, and all of us prefer to go after the higher quality girls.

Having enough sense to hold on to a girl that you are into isn't "one-itis". It's just good common sense.

One-itis is where you are more into the girl than she is into you. It's an obsession and fear of loss. It isn't merely preferring to continue dating a cool chick that you click with.

Don't start shit with your housemate until he's out of your place or you have moved out. Have boundaries, but don't get into a physical altercation or even much of an emotional one while you are under the same roof. Housemates can be unpredictable and vengeful, and you don't want the bad vibe. Just cold shoulder him and tell him you don't appreciate him putting his nose in your business. Tell him that you live together, but that doesn't mean you've hired him to be some sort of authority over your life. The guy obviously has issues; he is likely jealous and doesn't want anyone else to be getting more than he is, so he wants to drag you down to his despicably low fatty fucking level. It burns him up inside to see someone else playing by a different set of rules, and it's unlikely he'll have the introspection to notice he's only limiting himself, but you just might be able to point out the boundary issues and have him respect them. He's not your daddy, and your life is not his responsibility. Start calling him "hall monitor Bill", or whatever his name is. Fucking dorm cop.

Or be snide to the extreme, and start calling him Dad, alternated with Officer, and Mom, and be obsequious in asking for advice on all matters of moral authority. "Thanks Mom, what would I do without you! Do you think it's ok if I go get smokes? Can I drink a beer Mom? What would I do if I ever lived by myself? Without you as my hall monitor I'd be astray. Thank the lord for your wise guidance Mom."

[MikeCF]

If you like the girl, stay with her. I am not anti-girlfriend. Girlfriends are a lot of fun.

But stay with her on your terms.

If she is bugging out about what your roommate told her, tell her to walk.