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Girl sends text message with different plans to meet up. Go or bail?
09-27-2012, 11:59 AM
I received this text message from an 18 year old backpacker girl today I was supposed to meet with tomorrow [Friday] saying:
"Hey rebel, i've got an offer for you: come to the hostel tomorrow and i'll get you free into X hotel. plus you pay 10 bucks for unlimited drinking! say no and it's ok I'll hang with you and sit out the best deal of my life"
I don't really feel like going to the place but on the other hand the unlimited alcohol might raise her buying temperature and make getting her to my outdoor lay spot a little easier.
Alternatively I could tell her no and risk looking a little needy and take her to the bang location [beach] anyway with a bottle of wine, battle higher lmr and constant texts from her hostel pals.
Not sure how to win in this situation???
I'm throwing up a poll.
Cheers.
Von.
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Girl sends text message with different plans to meet up. Go or bail?
09-27-2012, 12:05 PM
I think the expected advice in this circumstance is to reject all last minute attempts by girls to grab hold of the frame. But that's usually because they want to switch from a 9PM alcohol date on a thursday to a sunday at 1 PM you buy them food and orbit date.
A girl who wants to change the frame into a situation where alcohol flows more freely - that may be a different story.
Tough decision. How badly do you want to hit it? How slutty is she?
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Girl sends text message with different plans to meet up. Go or bail?
09-27-2012, 12:09 PM
That actually sounds like a go. Every rule has an exception.
Unless she's bringing you there to compete with her other suitors from the hostel.
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Girl sends text message with different plans to meet up. Go or bail?
09-27-2012, 12:20 PM
Yea, I don't want to seem like some beta who will let her set the frame anytime but at the same time she's pretty dramatic and might twist the scenario into my being needy for wanting her to come while she had some amazing opportunity to get drunk.
She's 18, from scandinavia, from what I gather probably banged one guy in her entire life and has potential slut inside of her.
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Girl sends text message with different plans to meet up. Go or bail?
09-27-2012, 12:40 PM
Go for it, unless you have something better to do. The best that can happen is that you get laid, the worse is that you build your reference experiences in large hostel (no pun intended) social groups
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Girl sends text message with different plans to meet up. Go or bail?
09-27-2012, 12:59 PM
I would NOT go to the hostel with her because the hostel is more her territory than it is yours, she will be familiar with the place, know people there and you won't. Kind of gives her the upper hand and you could end up competing for her attention with other hostel people.
I'd take control and tell her the plans are already made and you're not changing them.
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Girl sends text message with different plans to meet up. Go or bail?
09-27-2012, 01:30 PM
pfff dude please.. "looking a little needy" ?? who cares. the chick is basically telling you to come over get shitfaced and fuck all night. at least that's how i see it. and even if nothing goes down there, you will have night of fun.
to me it's totally crazy that you even suggest flaking her and trying to take her somewhere else just to appear to be non needy. non neediness is attitude and state of mind, not faking that you're hard to get.
learn communication between the verses. be open when someone invites you. go and make it happen. FOR US!
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Girl sends text message with different plans to meet up. Go or bail?
09-27-2012, 01:42 PM
You're thinking about this way too much. When a man is first coming up or de-programming the beta out of himself, it's good to have rules of thumb to keep you on the straight and narrow. Just don't go getting all autistic about it.
Go hang out. Get drunk, but not too drunk. Party it up, befriend whatever cool guys are there and flirt with all the women. This ain't brain science.
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Girl sends text message with different plans to meet up. Go or bail?
09-27-2012, 01:43 PM
Hostel? Sounds like a horrible place to try and bang this chick. I wouldn't do it. She's just as likely to get fucked by some other guy in the hostel as she is by you. Crazy party environments are uncontrollable, and some other dude might steal the show as the alpha.
I would make up some bullshit if I were you. Tell her, "We can go to the hostel afterwards, but I really wanted to check out place XXX first"
Going someplace first where you can at least escalate a little bit with her, and then (if) you go to the hostel party, she'll already be into you and you won't need to worry about losing the lay to drunken hooligans.
But, better yet, just take her somewhere, have fun, and then fuck her brains out and avoid the shitty hostile in the first place.
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Girl sends text message with different plans to meet up. Go or bail?
09-27-2012, 02:18 PM
"hell yeah that sounds fun. I approve but I don't want to stay all night" or "as long as you don't mind all your girlfriends fighting over me, I can't just turn off this animal magnetism".
I think as long as you reframe it in a way that makes it look like its your decision you're good. And I wouldn't be worried about upper hands with location, just go own the place and do flirt with her friends
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Girl sends text message with different plans to meet up. Go or bail?
09-27-2012, 02:27 PM
I tell her something like "ok here is the deal, we start at the hostel and then I am taking you somewhere later. deal?"
Starting in a place where she is more comfortable will help her feel more comfortable about you = win
Booze freeing more freely = win
And if she agrees to your message know you can leave with her at any time and take her to a bar or to your place for the afterparty
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Girl sends text message with different plans to meet up. Go or bail?
09-27-2012, 05:55 PM
I say go bro. Shes not texting to flake, shes not suggesting a calmer venue. It even sounds like shes kinda gamming you, which is always a welcomed reversal. Get her plastered!
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Girl sends text message with different plans to meet up. Go or bail?
09-27-2012, 06:43 PM
Quote: (09-27-2012 01:43 PM)Samseau Wrote:
Hostel? Sounds like a horrible place to try and bang this chick. I wouldn't do it. She's just as likely to get fucked by some other guy in the hostel as she is by you. Crazy party environments are uncontrollable, and some other dude might steal the show as the alpha.
I would make up some bullshit if I were you. Tell her, "We can go to the hostel afterwards, but I really wanted to check out place XXX first"
Going someplace first where you can at least escalate a little bit with her, and then (if) you go to the hostel party, she'll already be into you and you won't need to worry about losing the lay to drunken hooligans.
But, better yet, just take her somewhere, have fun, and then fuck her brains out and avoid the shitty hostile in the first place.
I agree with all of this. Hostels are not good places for fucking in the first place and you might be denied entry from the sleeping area, the other guys at the hostel party however will be staying there so they can easily take over where you left off if you get chucked out and she decides to stay. If you insist on going though, take her somewhere else first and build the attraction then go.
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Girl sends text message with different plans to meet up. Go or bail?
09-27-2012, 07:08 PM
Quote: (09-27-2012 12:09 PM)DarkTriad Wrote:
That actually sounds like a go. Every rule has an exception.
Unless she's bringing you there to compete with her other suitors from the hostel.
This is what will happen.
The phrase "spare prick at a wedding" comes to mind.
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Girl sends text message with different plans to meet up. Go or bail?
09-27-2012, 08:18 PM
New Corollary to my fascist rules:
1) Never believe excuses.
2) Any attempt to change plans comprises a power struggle.
My impression is that any time they try to change plans unless it is to a more obviously sex-conducive plan, it means they aren't being submissive to you, and if her main goal is to fuck you she won't challenge you on anything.
That said, there's at least three ways to go on this.
1) Flat out say no, I'm into my original plan ,"or else".
2) Escalate by totally blowing her off, "No I'm not into that and decided I'd rather do something else tonight.[without her]"
2) Sidestep, do some variant of "OK, I'll do it," but then make an excuse later or right at the time "Oh, I realized I have to get my car out of the shop. Let's meet up <other time>." That way you superficially agree so the power struggle is kept subconscious, but you haven't given in to her.
3) Go along with her with the awareness that sex is less likely, do it for the learning experience.
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Girl sends text message with different plans to meet up. Go or bail?
09-27-2012, 08:29 PM
Go to the Hostel Party. She has been listening to people all week telling her how great this party will be. Show up and have a few drinks. The party will probably suck and you can leave with her. You know the area and your place is better than the hostel.
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Girl sends text message with different plans to meet up. Go or bail?
09-27-2012, 10:18 PM
I think this depends on your logistics. Like EasyMoney said, the "never change plans for a girl" thinking applies more to when a girl is trying to maneuver you into a shitty dinner date or whatever where sex is less likely to happen. Here it looks like she wants to get shitfaced and party and fuck so I wouldn't really think of it as a shit test.
However, you still need to consider how the bang is going to go down if you go to this hostel. Like other posters have mentioned, you're probably gonna have to deal with other dudes hitting on her, and it might be pretty hard to find a good place to fuck. High buying temperature's no good if you can't create the logistical opportunity to capitalize it or if some other guy pulls a robbery.
Overall, my recommendation would be to not go for this unless you can come up with a definite, realistic logistical plan. If you have a known, workable bang location close by and you're reasonably confident that you'll be able to pull her out of the hostel at the right time (consider seeding this ahead of time by telling her you're OK to start out there but you want to bounce if it gets lame), then I would go. If you don't have both of those things, then tease her for thinking a $10 open bar is the "best deal of her life" and proceed with the original plan.
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Girl sends text message with different plans to meet up. Go or bail?
09-27-2012, 11:09 PM
Ok, thanks for the replies, I actually 100% agree with Gringochileno since logistics might be an issue, however since the poll has given a majority for going there and getting her plastered first I will give it a try and see if it leads to a bang.
I sent the following message [props to JJ and Rionomad]
OK, here's the deal, we start at Kings Cross and then I am taking you somewhere else later. Deal? I'll drink but I've got to confess.. I'm kind of a slut when drunk.
She responded:
"You mean more than normally? And i'm gonna be drunk too. This isn't gonna be pretty. As for the plan i'm game, you want to come inside the hostel first or catch up on the street?"
I guess I will just see if I can actually remove her from the venue with the no doubt hordes of usual horny backpacker/club guys and if not game the other hostel sluts and try and venue change one of them.
I don't have my own place so my logistics are take her to a small locals only beach to bang there. Logistical issues are not being able to take my car because of drinking so waiting for bus then 15 min+ ride with very drunk girl. Then going to the beach late by which time it will likely be somewhere between 10 - 15 degree's celsius [50-60 F for the Americans] This could get complicated!
Any advice for separating her from the drunk hordes to leave the 'best deal of her life'?
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Girl sends text message with different plans to meet up. Go or bail?
09-28-2012, 02:53 AM
Beach bangs can work... but you should have a nice blanket to spread across the sand, and make sure you know of a particularly isolated area.
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