[Architekt]

Just curious, how many of you have kids, and what effect have they had on your life?

[The Fantasist]

I have an 8 year old daughter. She is without a doubt the best thing in my life,I could not be happier about being a father. The first year was hard,when they basically just lie there and vomit and I dent bond that much but then as their personality develops you get a kick out of doing stuff with them,teaching them stuff,having a laugh together. I do a lot of travel with her,just me and her heading of to random places,Belarus,Romania,Morroco etc. because in part I want her to learn how privileged her life is in the west and that others don't have it as easy. We get into cool adventures together which she gets a kick out of. She is developing into a very sweet and good young girl who has never given me a moments trouble.

I would not have another though no matter how much a partner wanted a child,I could not love another child as much as my daughter and also I can't wait til the little fcuker is 18 so I can be more selfish with my time! I love hanging out but sometimes,very selfishly,I would like to travel more. For example if I did not have her I'd move out to Russia for a year or two but I'd lose even more contact with her if I did that so it's not an option. That's cool though,I would not change anything.

It annoys me when I see shit fathers out there,people who have kids but then don't do fuck all with them or lose contact. I split with my daughter's mum but we kept relations good and make our daughter our priority over our own resentments. I'd never ever diss her mum to her or vice versa,shit like that is low.

How has she impacted on my game? Well I struggle when I'm with her. I find it hard to switch into game mode when I'm in dad mode. I was invited to join the mile high club by a smoking hot Romanian girl on a flight back from Bucharest one new years eve a couple years back. Because my daughter was sitting next to me and my game face was not on I totally fcuked up the encounter and lost the opportunity ity. My biggest regret in game to date. I still shudder at the memory of my own betaness on that flight. Otherwise no probs,I tell women I have a daughter if they ask,I don't hide my past from anyone,it's never cost me bangs I don't think.

Well,that's all my take on fatherhood anyway.

[Vicious]

Seriously thinking about it.

[Hades]

I considered it once or twice. I don't want to be tied down until I'm 50 and not as energetic.
I know that it's bad for the child to have an older father, maybe not genetically but you kind of owe your kid your best self (20s-30s-40s).

One of my friends back home noticed his bangs increasing after having a kid, because he would talk about how much he loves his little daughter and has big hopes for her future, and girls practically go wet seeing somebody visibly passionate about something.

[Parlay44]

It's a bitter-sweet thing for me. I ended up knocking up a long term fuck buddy of mine.
Hottest piece of ass Asian stripper ever She was looking for a serious relationship and marriage
and I was like "Yeah I don't think so". It's been kinda hellish ever since. Lotsa court time. Lotsa lawyer fees.
Restraining orders. Destruction of property. Choose your baby momma wisely. That's all I can tell ya

[Private Man]

Childfree by choice... look into it.

[kinjutsu]

@ Parlay44

I feel you on the hot stripper asian ass.
Do you have full custody of the child?

I will 85% likely have kids. 1 of each sex. It will not be a western women, most likely an asian women (japan/korea).
They will be treated differently based on their sex and most importantly the woman will be extremely feminine.

[teh_skeeze]

I have no kids right now, nor do I plan on having any. However, if I find myself in a position where I can be the sole breadwinner, I would probably have like 8 kids. I don't see that happening until I leave the US.

[Parlay44]

(09-20-2012 08:52 AM)kinjutsu Wrote:  

@ Parlay44

I feel you on the hot stripper asian ass.
Do you have full custody of the child?

I'm working on it. You have to walk on water to get custody away from a woman in NJ.

[Merenguero]

(09-20-2012 11:57 AM)Parlay44 Wrote:  

(09-20-2012 08:52 AM)kinjutsu Wrote:  

@ Parlay44

I feel you on the hot stripper asian ass.
Do you have full custody of the child?

I'm working on it. You have to walk on water to get custody away from a woman in NJ.

I have seen an increase in fathers being awarded custody over the past five years or so. In most of those cases, there was substantiated physical abuse by the mother on the children. There are, of course, other factors which can lead a father to be awarded custody.

Factors which hurt in a custody battle:
Prior physical abuse onto the child
Separating from the child's mother without taking the child with you (Never having lived with the child's mother is not as much of a negative factor)
The child's mother having been granted prior Protective Orders against you (This hurts more in joint legal custody determinations where communication between the parents is a key factor. I have never seen anyone successfully argue that domestic violence between the parents creates a likelyhood of domestic violence onto the child)
Not knowing the child's doctors and/or not being familiar with the child's school and his or her teachers

Factors which help in a custody battle:
The child having his or her own room or at the very least his or her own bed in your home
Having a person with whom the child is familiar who would always be available to take care of the child in the event that you have employment or other obligations
Living close to the child's mother (This is not really a factor in sole custody, but rather a factor in the fallback position of shared physical custody)

[Menace]

In a position similar to Vorkuta, with similar relations with the ex. One thing I will say about having a child is that you realize what a pale and vaporous thing the "love" you feel for a woman is.

[tstyle]

I have a three-month-old daughter. Obviously I'm still pretty new to this but my overall impression is this: Having a kid is like having a submissive wife - you do more for them because they love you, respect you, and depend on you. My daughter being a morning person makes me a morning person. Plus, it satisfies the vanity of knowing there's a smaller version of you running around.

[el mechanico]

(09-20-2012 01:55 PM)Menace Wrote:  

In a position similar to Vorkuta, with similar relations with the ex. One thing I will say about having a child is that you realize what a pale and vaporous thing the "love" you feel for a woman is.

True and they know it.

[kdolo]

(09-20-2012 05:51 AM)Vicious Wrote:  

Seriously thinking about it.

at the end if the day, biologically speaking the only reason you exist is to procreate - so get on with it

[Vicious]

(09-20-2012 02:33 PM)kdolo Wrote:  

(09-20-2012 05:51 AM)Vicious Wrote:  

Seriously thinking about it.

at the end if the day, biologically speaking the only reason you exist is to procreate - so get on with it

Well, there are the usual dilemmas. I'm in my mid-thirties so I still have plenty of time left to roll around which will be zapped if I become a father. Still I don't want to be an old fart dad when my kid(s) reach their teens and I genuinely feel that I will have a seriously hard time finding a better mother for my child(ren).

[Gunner]

Still young but I want one or two.

[mikeymike]

I don't have kids, grew up thinking I'd always have kids, like kids but the older I get the more selfish I feel like I'm becoming. I love my dog as much as my parents and sister, she's like my baby girl and there are times when I'm ready to take off at the drop of a hat to travel somewhere I can't cause I have to make arrangements for her, and I'm out nights and I'll cut it short to get home to the dog...there are times that feels like an all consuming commitment...a kid is that x 100. I have trouble seeing the life I want to live and how a child fits into that and that's not even factoring in babymommas etc...got nothing but respect for you guys that live this life and are good dads and make it all work.

[Cincinnatus]

I've always wanted kids and I still do, though at the age of 24 I'm thinking that it's best I hold off for at least a few more years.

When I want to go to a hockey game and get drunk and yell at grown men beating the shit out of each other, I get up and go. When I learn at the last second that a band I want to see is coming to town, I get up and go. When my buddy downtown says "Come on over, we've got a keg and a DJ at my apartment" I get up and go. I know that bringing a child into this world would mean the end of that kind of freedom, and I'm not sure that I'm willing to voluntarily give all that up.

A lot of the people I went to high school with have kids in elementary school now, and they (the parents) have done nothing but work, sleep, and care for their child since graduating. I've traveled, been to dozens of concerts, hockey games, festivals, etc. and I know I would have missed most of that if there were a mini-MSW2007 in the world.

I guess it's something I'll learn as I go along. I know that some of the fathers here, like el mechanico, love their children in a way that those of us without children could never understand. Someday, I might like to know what that's like.

[Screwston]

I would love to have kids one day (maybe 10 or 15 years from now) but I don't know how I'll do it in America. Imagine the hate you would get if you were 40 and knocked up a 21 year old I sure as hell ain't trying to get a woman my age pregnant when that time comes.

[bacon]

i got a vasectomy in my mid 20´s. i see kids as an obstacle to my freedom. i think a lot of men dont consider the full reality of having kids. they are expensive and if you do it right and raise them they require a lot of time, patience and responsibility. there is also no gaurantee that they will grow up to either hate you or leech off you. i also think some men are more paternal and really love being around kids. i get annoyed way to easily by them and never feel much of anything when i am around them.

i think whether a guy should have kids really comes down to fully understanding the full financial and time sacrifices and also the potential risks of not liking how your kids might turn out and the power of the family court system. if you are ok with all that and really love being around kids then i say go for it. i suspect however a lot of guys don´t think this critically about having kids which is crazy because its likely the biggest decision of your life.

btw i think you will meet way more people who in their later years of life regretted having kids rather than never having them . . . especially men

[Kickb]

Bullet proof condom when I'm in these hos.

Actually, I rely on plan B pills more than condoms; they are never around when I need them.

My brother has 2 kids and is doing fine. His personality is way different than mine and he seems to be happy having settled down at 27 years old.

When I do procreate it better be with a semi intelligent cute girl. I don't know how I would live with myself if I accidentally knocked up a stupid fat girl.