[Belize King]

First off, I love this forum. When I found the news out this morning, I wondered what the board would think.

As a player, it is almost like a death sentence. I have dodged two bullets in my life and looking back I am happy about it. You think you would learn the first time but the second time was a straight xanax and liquor induced smash that I couldn't remember. Anyway, it's not about me but being a developing player the first thing that went through my mind is I hope she doesn't keep it.

I spoke to some of my battle buddies this morning about it. They are all older cats (early 40's). They are saying that it is a blessing. I actually felt like a shithead after how positive they were about the situation.

A little about the situation. My little step sister is 21, about to finish her degree in accounting this fall, and has never worked a day in her life. She went to Belize for a little summer vacation in May and returned pregnant. An average dude in Belize pulls 6K a year. Those are mostly city dudes and dudes in the capital. She was messing around in the south so more than likely the dude doesn’t have shit going for him. Basically she will be raising the child alone. Thing is she can't take care of herself. Her mother does everything for her and supports her. Which is cool while you are in college, but she could have easily gotten a job to help out. She never has.

She is 21 yo so you can imagine what is running through her mind right now. All the shopping, babyshower, blahblahblah but this shit is going to break my dad's marriage. He fought hard to get my niece out the house. She is finally going with her mom after 6 years. So the house is my brother who just moved back home (23) and my little sister(21). Now if she keeps it then a new child will be in the picture that my dad will have to support for a while. My pops is so close to retirement in Belize haha. I emailed him today. He has that beaten tone in him. That "what could you do" face. I think he will suck it up for a year then try to boot her, move to Belize, or divorce my stepmom.

The baby is a month along right now. Women get so emotional when they can start feeling it. My first dodge was 8 weeks along and she cried to me for 20 mins. The second was 6 weeks along and I actually was there and paid for everything. A month is almost the point of no return for the young girls. I think she is going to keep it.

Alright, if you had some advice for your little sister, what would you tell her? I wouldn't try to sway her either way but I would try to smack her in the face with reality, tell her about my experience, tell her how she is going to fuck up my dad and her moms marriage, and in the end tell her she needs to "woman up" if she is going to become a mother.

I would recommend the military to her because that degree with no experience can only take her so far. Finish her degree, go officer, drop the baby with dude if possible, and get that first duty station then figure shit out. Otherwise she will be working some 10hr job depending on her mother and my father for support.

Appreciate the thoughts.

[OGNorCal707]

Tell her to abort it ASAP, otherwise she's going to have a drain on her for the rest of her life, and by the way you describe her she'll most likely be a shitty or absent parent.

[Belize King]

Thats what I was thinking off top, but then some women become women after their first child. My older sister did. She calmed down, finished her degree, and took life serious. Thing is she was 25 when she had her child so a little bit older and wiser. The dad is a shithead who hasn't done anything the last 8 years.

Is it wrong to just tell her she needs to abort, have kids later when she is ready, has a stable career, and hopefully a man in her life?

[durangotang]

I am against abortion personally, so I say support her decision.

[Kona]

I come from a family and a race that fucks like rabbits. We got a ton of damn kids running around.

Our rule is that whenever there's a baby coming up, step one is to immediately bring the situation to our pops attention.

A few years back, there was an abortion doctor in Honolulu who's name was (no joke) Dr. Overy. We were always joking about a brother or sometimes our dad having to "take one to Dr. Overy." Dr. Overy has since retired but it's still the joke.

With our sisters, if one was going to see Dr. Overy, that shit had to happen right away. That's a Hawaiian in there, and a member of our family, so if it is coming out we need to make sure it starts getting the best of everything because that's what it deserves.

Other than that, as the brother, you can give your advice but don't push it so hard. You don't want to completely alienate your sister, and in turn your future niece/nephew from your life.

Aloha!

[assman]

One thing she should be made aware of is her far more limited dating options as a single mother.

[Roosh]

First, find out the things she likes doing in life, whether it's partying, going out, etc.

Then have a speech with her how EVERYTHING SHE LIKES WILL END. Make it seem like her life will be over, that she will be miserable. That single-parenting is slavery, imprisonment.

Also tell her that no man will want her, that only losers date single moms. That she will never find a husband. It will be hard to get a good career with so much baggage. Etc etc etc.

Basically spell out the apocalypse.

[UgSlayer]

Really, you're not going to change her mind logically. All those emotions and hormones will supercharge her hamster and put up a hamster force field to whatever you say. She may end up hating you for trying to talk her into an abortion and you will forever be "that uncle". She will be a drain on your father, but it's his choice to let her stay in the house. If you feel so strongly about your father having to support the child, I would start talking to him rather than your step sister. He can give her a concrete time frame so she can get on her feet and get a job and so he can finally retire.

Having her join the military is a good idea. Talk to her seriously about it.

[UgSlayer]

I like Roosh's ideas, but the problem I see with it is that she will just rationalize all of that by saying now that she has a baby, what she likes will change and she will "grow up" much like your other sister did. And how she doesn't need a man to be happy.

Of course, it's all bullshit, but the rationalization hamster is strong within a pregnant woman.

Something has to happen that will affect her emotionally to change her mind. Sit her down and have her watch a documentary about single moms or a movie about single moms that doesn't depict them as heroes. Or have one of your friends come over and clown single moms in front of her without him knowing she's pregnant. Or even just ask him straight up in front of her if he'd be serious about a single mom, and have him answer honestly. It has to hit her in her gut for it to have an effect.

[johnw28]

If I were you I'd buy my father his plane ticket to belize and tell him it is time to forget about other peoples problems and live his life. As far as your sister it is time she grows up and accepts resposibilities for her actions. Whether she aborts or not isn't the real issue it is her lack of maturity in life.

[Saladin]

Show her all the statistics of children of single moms being more likely to be deliquent and criminals.

[defguy]

The sister sounds like a moron so I doubt logic or rationalization will solve anything. I think what TX is getting at is "how to save his dad" as his dad is near retirement. Thinking you can save your dad by making your moronic step sister "see the light" isnt going to work. She allowed herself to get AND stay pregnant by what seems like a random guy, no logic in that head, maybe shell grow up, but kids are a drain on energy and resources no matter how you look at it. Your dad is about to become a FULL TIME grandpa whether he likes it or not.

Personally I would focus on you dad, talk to him. Let him know that you see it as an end to everything he has worked so hard for. Let him know what you see as his future and maybe help him come to terms. Youve "swallowed the red pill" so you can look at these things objectively. Depending on how old school or beta your dad is, you might even have to put divorce being an option into your fathers head if he wants to get that freedom he spent so many years working for. If he sees it as your stepmom and stepsister being selfish and a drain on his life he may put his foot down about it.

At least then its not like your dad is being forced into a lifestyle without having any say in it, he ultimately decides what he wants as his future.

[WanderingSoul]

(06-25-2012 05:46 PM)Roosh Wrote:  

First, find out the things she likes doing in life, whether it's partying, going out, etc.

Then have a speech with her how EVERYTHING SHE LIKES WILL END. Make it seem like her life will be over, that she will be miserable. That single-parenting is slavery, imprisonment.

Also tell her that no man will want her, that only losers date single moms. That she will never find a husband. It will be hard to get a good career with so much baggage. Etc etc etc.

Basically spell out the apocalypse.

This is EXACTLY what I was just going to post. I think this is the way to go. It's the truth. My friends who have kids all can't do dick.

I remember when I first realized that people with young kids can't do anything. I called my buddy who had a 6month old daughter to see if him and his girl wanted to go to the movies with me and my girl at the time. He said he couldn't....because he had his daughter. It hit me like a ton of bricks. All I could think was wow, that fucking sucks.

Having kids is no fun unless that is what you REALLY want. Most people do not.

[HiFlo]

This would make a great 'opinion opener.'

IMO, abortion is the route. A 21 year old girl who has a summer fling with while doing a summer abroad is in no position to raise a healthy child.

Depending on whether she actually listens to her family, it may pay to have her visit a counselor/specialist several times to reinforce the idea that - as roosh said - everything she likes will end as a single mom without a current career and without a stable relationship.