[lurker123123]

How do you go about getting fb or fwb or gf to split the check? These are girls I've banged multiple times already and I dont want to keep paying simply because I'm the guy. Up until now I have been paying all of it. whats the best way to ask without coming across as cheap

[Tuthmosis]

In my experience, this takes two dinners to do.

When the next bill comes (preferably at a cheap place), snatch it quick, but say this:

"I got it. You'll get us next time."

But, if you've already banged the girl several times, you can just push the bill over to her and say:

"Your turn."

OR

"You got this one, right?"

If she puts up a fight, say "Fine. I got $10 on it" [or whatever your cost was].

[Menace]

This is not actually a problem. Stop paying for them and tell them to pay half (I am assuming this is some Western scenario where the girl is not legitimately poor). Whatever you think she could conceivably say to you, say to her first. Call them cheap, ungreatful, selfish, everything. I treat an LTR when I feel like it (maybe 1/3 the time, the rest I make her pay). What's she gonna do, leave?

[HiFlo]

IMO calling her "greedy and selfish" FIRST is overgaming and kind of assholeish. I think it may be useful LATER ON if she resists, but I think it's better to be nicer about it at first.

I've had a lot of success just bringing it up casually when you're driving some place. "Hey, look I been taking you out and have enjoyed every time we've spent together, but it'd be cool if you could help out money-wise on our dates....Tonight's on me, the next is on you" Unless she's really stuck up & high-maintenance I think she'll understand.

[Screwston]

if she's a friend with benefits or girlfriend, just tell her. why wouldn't you? say you're low on cash and need to her to pay half if y'all are going out to eat.

[j r]

If this is an issue when the check comes, it's too late. You can refuse to pay for her, but it's going to make you look cheap and generally unmanly. Now not caring about how you look is one solution, but you have to have a strong frame to be successful with that one. I think it's better just to prevent it from happening in the first place.

One thing to consider is that there are two types of women. There are woman who will do everything in their power to get a meal out of you. These are the chicks who "forget" their wallets in the car and suggest places that they'd never go if they were paying. With other girls, it's not so much that they're gold diggers, but that they hate that socially awkward moment of not knowing whether to chip in or not. These chicks usually don't mind paying for you if it's established in advance.

With the gold diggers, you have to be direct. Unless, of course, you're running some kind of long con where you flash some cash at the beginning and then pull back until she's doing most of the paying. Otherwise, straight up tell them whether you're willing to pay or not. If you let these chicks know that you're not a mark, they'll either stop treating you like one or they'll be out. Either way, you win.

The other chicks, it's best just to avoid anything approaching a confrontation. They will likely consider themselves "empowered," but, hey, who doesn't like a free meal. These mixed feelings make them all sad and confused inside. It's best to just spare them the cognitive dissidence and take turns paying. There's all sorts of ways of letting her know that she is paying without coming across as a herb. Make bets that you know you'll win. Say things like, "I'm driving, but it's your treat." They'll catch on.

[Giovonny]

(06-06-2012 02:48 PM)Tuthmosis Wrote:  

"I got it. You'll get us next time."

"Your turn."

OR

"You got this one, right?"

Basically this, you need to come up with some little phrases that communicate to the girl that you expect her to pay for her half of the bill.

When the bill comes, I grab it, look at it, and say....

"It's $25, just give me a $10 and leave her a few bucks for the tip"

"It's $20, just give me a $10"

"It's $30, damn your a big eater, just give me 15"

Actually, on my dates, it's more like...

"It's 11 bucks, just give me a 5, and are you gonna eat that last taco?"

Once in a while, I might pick up the full tab. But, thats the exception not the norm.

I recently had a mini-relationship. The first date I paid the bill. The second date she offered to pay half, The third date she paid. The fourth date we paid half/half. After that we just went back and forth with her paying one week and me the next.

If you really need to sort it out before the date. You can say things like..

"I'll get dinner and you can get drinks"

"Lets split it cause I don't get paid til Friday"

"I'm broke right now can you buy"

Just find some little playful (not to serious) phrases/statements that are gonna work for you. The last thing you want is to feel like girls are taking advantage of your kindness.