Quote: (10-04-2018 04:57 AM)Mikestar Wrote:
I’m falling back to the addiction, I’m on day 25 and I edged to porn yesterday and today for 15 mins. Is it better to bust and then restart or just stop edging?
Stop watching porn.
Stop edging.
Are you addicted to quickly rubbing one out or are you addicted to porn?
You know the answer.
If you really feel the strong, intense need to clean the pipes and there's no way to overcome it anymore, just do it quickly and without porn, and then move on with your life without thinking too much about it.
In that case it's basically like taking a shit or clipping your nails.
Pure maintenance. Annoying, pretty much a waste of time, but necessary.
However, odds are that you're actually not physically uncomfortable.
You're just bored.
Go do something with your life. Get a girlfriend, make some new friends and get a social life, get a new hobby, lift some weights or do sports, learn something useful, improve yourself. I think most guys who jerk off too much do so because they are bored out of their minds, they have nothing else going on in their lives, no success, nothing that excites them, nothing that gives them a nice dopamine hit. So they turn to porn and choking their dick until it's dead.
I'm also wondering when guys are going to find out that they are framing the whole thing in a completely wrong way.
I hate those words, "relapse" and "restart". Everyone's always worrying about that to the point where it's frankly absurd.
It's basically a negative feedback loop.
"I went 20 days. Relapsed. I went 35 days. Back to the start. This time I managed to do 12 days. Aaaand I relapsed."
You are always losing.
NoFap as most guys practice it has no positive reinforcement, no positive feedback loop (actually it does, but not the one you want).
It's just fail after fail after fail.
You are setting yourself up for failure the moment you start it. You actually start to feel more like a loser than you did before you went on NoFap.
It results in regular doses of self-imposed feelings of failure and dejection. Guess what this does to your body's hormonal balance.
But maybe you are really disciplined and determined, and only "relapsed" after 6 months? Shouldn't you feel proud and happy and accomplished?
Well, congratulations, but guess what, it's yet another fail, so back to the start you go, feeling like a loser again.
Where does it end? Where's the progress? When do you win this game?
You can't.
I posted it earlier in this thread, and I'll say it again, just for good measure.
Porn addiction and compulsive masturbation are the symptom, not the cause.
If you are fighting the symptom, you will always lose in the long run.
You have to identify the cause to heal the disease.
Find out what's wrong with your life and fix it.
That's the ugly little secret of NoFap.
It's not self-improvement at all.
It's mental masturbation for people who want to feel like they are doing something, without really making an effort (notice the pattern). And then in the end they can all hug each other after they inevitably "relapse", maybe create some drama or earn pity for their sob story, get some support and engagement and words of encouragement before they start again, and enjoy the fuzzy feeling of not being alone, being part of a group, of having other people care about them and believing in them.
So the only positive emotional feedback you'll ever get on NoFap is when you fail.
Hm, I wonder what this incentive leads to?
And then after that short spike of positivity you go back to feeling like a loser and the whole vicious circle starts again.
So stop being a bitch, and start to fix your life.
Stop counting days, stop treating this like a challenge.
NoFap is a game, a game that never ends, a game that you can't win once you are in.
So the only way to win this game is not to play.
Improve yourself and improve your life, and the urge to watch porn or jerk off will gradually decrease as you discover other, much more sustainable and satisfying ways to get that dopamine hit.
