[Jetset]

(05-25-2019 06:01 AM)Dr. Howard Wrote:  

[*] Cuckold avoidance. This is a true story. A buddy of mine who was a no premarital sex guy was engaged to a secular girl. As the wedding was closing in she REALLY started putting the pressure on him to bang. He declined and she subsequently left one day while he was at work. He really felt bad about it and thought...would she have left if I just banged her? He literally has never seen/talked to her again. However, one of his buddies sees her at her workplace a few months later and she is really pregnant and the story unravels. This woman was cheating on her fiancee. She got pregnant and was trying to bang the fiancee so that she could claim the kid was his/make an excuse for being pregnant at the wedding. He didn't give in and so she had no option but to vanish. This man's standards saved him from a terrible deception.
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Those are some risks about having early sex in even a secular long term relationship. However, the paradox still remains that it is very unlikely that you will ever end up in any kind of relationship with a secular girl without premarital sex in these modern times. Its a devil's bargain.

Quick counter-point:

Once upon a time, I'd been texting with a woman who eventually came to visit because this is her hometown and she ended up crashing at my place. She ended up banging my brains out for about two weeks. She wanted to try anything and everything you might characterize as degenerate, but also mentioned Jesus a lot. Whatever, I grew up in the mid-South. I know the score with church girls.

About halfway into it, she mentions her "divorce" and that she's having an argument with her "ex-husband" who isn't yet actually her "ex-husband". Ah, now the rest of the picture is coming into focus. She'd been deliberately misleading about her home situation because she wanted new dick and is now microdosing the truth so she can role-play innocence, as women often do.



I give her the boot and she finds a job and an apartment to start over, goes on a tour of her high school crushes.

Then some more time passes, she reunites with her husband under pressure from her family, and word gets back to her circle of friends that she's pregnant. Her husband now thinks he has children, I guess.

I also take issue with point #1. It's strange to claim that men only tolerate crazy if they're getting laid. I'd argue that the opposite is true: mediocre women successfully weaponize the promise of sex to keep men on the hook and squeeze them for more as a matter of course. The idea that, in a dutiful, chaste Christian world, a man would have more ammunition to walk away from craziness doesn't hold at all, because he won't get laid anywhere else.

Adherence to abstinence is not a substitute for the acceptance of abundance. Game saves lives, etc. Standards are important, and I respect your points. I'm just saying that a "good Christian marriage" does not short-circuit biology and may not be the insurance policy followers wish it to be. As I've said elsewhere, it's hard to shake the sense that this "tradcon" thing is entirely too optimistic about believing that they can change human nature so that they won't have to address the dirty, dark parts.