Quote: (04-13-2019 02:59 PM)Repo Wrote:
You say other guys are dancing with them and then sitting down with them almost as if that's a negative thing, is that not what your doing? In smaller towns that can be a solid strategy. Warm them up, get another drink or two in them, and then bounce with them. I take it these arent New York nightclubs your going to.
My suggestion would be some nights try focusing more on quality sets vs quantity, and push as far as you can get each one to get them home or at least bounce to a new venue with you. Dont be bailing from a set because you saw another girl you also want to talk to, bail when you have pushed it as far as you can and it's clear she isnt taking the bait.
Dance with them, sit them down to small talk and get them comfortable while they get another drink, then hit them with the "let's go back to my spot to smoke weed/check out my record collection/etc". It feels like your focusing too much on the front end of the interaction, versus the closing part which is the most important.
Yes that is the near the norm. Dance and then try to sit down to talk. I do that sometimes, and rest of time I try to dance first and sort of judge how the interaction is going. Which is maybe better because dancing is escalation in some sense.
I haven't bought any girls drinks. Old habits die hard. I offered a girl one the other night, but she got a drink from her friend. Tonight, i'm going ot focus on taking each set to logical conclusion. And try to work through them. Maybe I posted unclearly, but basiclly most the sets i stayed with for a good 10 or so minutes, at minimum.
I agree with your final statement too. Given how well I think last night went (8 sets or so, talked to i don't know maybe 20 or so girls). I have a lot to work on, and tonight is a better night to go out anyway.
Thanks for input man.
Judging from what happened last week, I'm doing way better this week. I think I only managed two sets last week on Sat. night. And the girl approached me basiclly. And I was mad that I fucked it up... Anyway, I talked to my wing last night, sort of having a debriefing from last week, and he said it was a real player move to call over a girl to the table and tell her to take a seat. He gave me mad props for that.
This time last week I was in my car feeling utterly dejected because I let a good set sink where a girl approached me.. That was rare for me, stuff like that never happens to me. And then last night, at least 3 separate girls approach me. I must be doing something right...
My wing says it is crucial to dance as much as possible (yeah not a nyc style club), in order to have that abundance mentality and to get girl's attention.
It's wierd, I think at this point my wing is trying to pay me back for all the knowledge I've given him in the short time we've known each other.. I think I helped him-- for example I taught him a bit about IOIs, women's body language, and how their conversational lines determine if they're expressing interest in you. He was actually a bit baffled when i explained to him some positive interactions we'd had in sets where he'd missed the girls subconsious cues, etc. So then he went and read-up on IOIs, and believe it or not, I think that alone helped him a lot.
Also very bizarre, I was rolling with my wing for at least part of last night, and first some girl comes up to us, and starts acting like we're gay or something. Weird... and then outside, people start talking to us randomly, like unprompted... Is this the result of like some congruency we've developed that people pick up on? Hasn't really happened to us before when we're gaming...