Sorry for the long post, but wanted to get as much information here on the situation to see what your thoughts were. I met a girl 4 months ago, she is 18 (a virgin too), I am 28. Things were going great.
I gamed her well until this point. Push/pull, texting was 50/50, texting was minimum, not every day, and we would both exit out of conversations. I would keep meeting to once a week.
There was a point early on where she bluntly said she didn’t want to see me anymore. This was because she was subtly asking for a relationship a number of times which I was too arrogant in my response. I went ghost for a day and then went a bit AFC – said I wanted her. It worked on this girl and we started seeing each other again.
We had lots of dates since then and everything was great. We had planned going to a play for some time, she bought the tickets for us, and we were both very excited for it, we agreed a couple of dates ago that we would sleep with each other that weekend, but I didn’t mention it again as she said she was scared and would need to think about it.
We went on another date after that, this was I knew her IL was sky high through these actions:
-Kinoing me, head in my chest and hugging constant
-she bought me gifts from russia
-taught me I love you in her native language
-said she wished she could see me every day
-said she could not sleep the night before because she wanted to see me
-said I really like you a lot
I then didn’t initiate texting for 3 days after the date above where I then initiated with some small talk, day after that I asked her to meet at 2 for the play, she said she couldn’t go, her mum didn’t let her, there was no offer of another meet-up, I didn’t make a big deal of it, the conversation then went like this:
Me: that’s okay, atleast I can sleep in now!
Her: yes! Because you are the king! (I used to call myself the king to her),
Me: I like to sleep with my crown on! My servants keep it on for me!
I didn’t set-up another date, I felt like she was being distant and I thought she didn’t care. Turns out she went to the city with some friends she hasn’t seen in a long time.
I then went ghost for a day, then re-initiated again, asked her how her weekend was, she said she was studying (a lie) again a few texts, I wanted to gauge her interest, I wasn’t getting much response. I then ghosted for another day, where I then initiated for a fourth time, I said have you heard from your cat in Russia, I got a lengthy response which I was pleased about, I then said again that I missed him, she replied “he doesn’t miss you” no laughing faces or “haha’s”, I then asked how she was where I got no reply. I tried to call her two days after to find out what was going on, she didn’t reply, said she couldn’t talk, so I said its fine im going to London anyway, so she told me to piss off.
The next day I apologized, and put my feelings on the line, I still didn’t know what was actually wrong at this point.
She texted a few days later saying: I’m upset about you, in my opinion the relationship cannot continue. Ps you should hold your tounge when you talk to me. Her grammar isn’t great, and I wanted to speak to her on the phone, she wouldn’t pick up, I said call me because I don’t understand.
She said: im trying to say I don’t want to talk anymore, so you can continue to sleep with your “crown” on your head.
I didn’t respond, a few hours later I get a : you are a beggar who costs nothing. She was twisting when I used to call myself a king against me, she did used to laugh at these jokes of mine.
I thought maybe also she wanted to hear was an apology so I said sorry again. She then said: and I have news for you, I have another man. Shes not lying, I saw a pic on her social media with him.
I then said ok, and then put my heart on the line again, said the last 4 months weren’t a joke and so on, she then blocked me. I had ordered some flowers a few days before which were due to arrive in a couple of days.
The flowers arrived, she unblocked me then said thank you she loved them. I apologized, she said ok but to never be mean to her again. She called me excited, asked when we could meet, I saw her yesterday.
It was like nothing had ever happened, I brought up the situation because I wanted to know what had happened, as I still wasnt sure, and wanted to avoid it from happening again, her response was that she was thinking about herself and that relationships are hard. I found this response weird, as if this was the case why was she insulting me and saying I was being mean? I then joked around with her having another guy, I asked if she was seeing someone, she said she had been but not anymore and that he had gone back to his home country, she also deleted the photo of them two off social media. I wont be bringing him up again, me and her have never had a talk about seeing other people after 4 months. I said to her if anything happens where you get upset again she needs to tell me so that we can sort it out, she agreed.
This is where we are now, we're talking all ill be seeing her again next week. She didn't let me kiss her yesterday.
What are your takes / advice going forward? or feedback on this interaction.
I gamed her well until this point. Push/pull, texting was 50/50, texting was minimum, not every day, and we would both exit out of conversations. I would keep meeting to once a week.
There was a point early on where she bluntly said she didn’t want to see me anymore. This was because she was subtly asking for a relationship a number of times which I was too arrogant in my response. I went ghost for a day and then went a bit AFC – said I wanted her. It worked on this girl and we started seeing each other again.
We had lots of dates since then and everything was great. We had planned going to a play for some time, she bought the tickets for us, and we were both very excited for it, we agreed a couple of dates ago that we would sleep with each other that weekend, but I didn’t mention it again as she said she was scared and would need to think about it.
We went on another date after that, this was I knew her IL was sky high through these actions:
-Kinoing me, head in my chest and hugging constant
-she bought me gifts from russia
-taught me I love you in her native language
-said she wished she could see me every day
-said she could not sleep the night before because she wanted to see me
-said I really like you a lot
I then didn’t initiate texting for 3 days after the date above where I then initiated with some small talk, day after that I asked her to meet at 2 for the play, she said she couldn’t go, her mum didn’t let her, there was no offer of another meet-up, I didn’t make a big deal of it, the conversation then went like this:
Me: that’s okay, atleast I can sleep in now!
Her: yes! Because you are the king! (I used to call myself the king to her),
Me: I like to sleep with my crown on! My servants keep it on for me!
I didn’t set-up another date, I felt like she was being distant and I thought she didn’t care. Turns out she went to the city with some friends she hasn’t seen in a long time.
I then went ghost for a day, then re-initiated again, asked her how her weekend was, she said she was studying (a lie) again a few texts, I wanted to gauge her interest, I wasn’t getting much response. I then ghosted for another day, where I then initiated for a fourth time, I said have you heard from your cat in Russia, I got a lengthy response which I was pleased about, I then said again that I missed him, she replied “he doesn’t miss you” no laughing faces or “haha’s”, I then asked how she was where I got no reply. I tried to call her two days after to find out what was going on, she didn’t reply, said she couldn’t talk, so I said its fine im going to London anyway, so she told me to piss off.
The next day I apologized, and put my feelings on the line, I still didn’t know what was actually wrong at this point.
She texted a few days later saying: I’m upset about you, in my opinion the relationship cannot continue. Ps you should hold your tounge when you talk to me. Her grammar isn’t great, and I wanted to speak to her on the phone, she wouldn’t pick up, I said call me because I don’t understand.
She said: im trying to say I don’t want to talk anymore, so you can continue to sleep with your “crown” on your head.
I didn’t respond, a few hours later I get a : you are a beggar who costs nothing. She was twisting when I used to call myself a king against me, she did used to laugh at these jokes of mine.
I thought maybe also she wanted to hear was an apology so I said sorry again. She then said: and I have news for you, I have another man. Shes not lying, I saw a pic on her social media with him.
I then said ok, and then put my heart on the line again, said the last 4 months weren’t a joke and so on, she then blocked me. I had ordered some flowers a few days before which were due to arrive in a couple of days.
The flowers arrived, she unblocked me then said thank you she loved them. I apologized, she said ok but to never be mean to her again. She called me excited, asked when we could meet, I saw her yesterday.
It was like nothing had ever happened, I brought up the situation because I wanted to know what had happened, as I still wasnt sure, and wanted to avoid it from happening again, her response was that she was thinking about herself and that relationships are hard. I found this response weird, as if this was the case why was she insulting me and saying I was being mean? I then joked around with her having another guy, I asked if she was seeing someone, she said she had been but not anymore and that he had gone back to his home country, she also deleted the photo of them two off social media. I wont be bringing him up again, me and her have never had a talk about seeing other people after 4 months. I said to her if anything happens where you get upset again she needs to tell me so that we can sort it out, she agreed.
This is where we are now, we're talking all ill be seeing her again next week. She didn't let me kiss her yesterday.
What are your takes / advice going forward? or feedback on this interaction.