Update guys!
So I just got back from my first non-hooker bang off tinder and it really kind of shifted my view on sex/relationships in general.
I know one tinder bang doesn't seem like a big deal to a lot of folks out there in the community but I was viewing sex/relationships through a very "selfish" light before my epiphany today.
I've lead a very selfish life up until now, and one of my business mentors told me to start giving and eventually, even if some people don't reciprocate, the universe tends to give back. So this theme of "giving" has been ringing pretty loud in my mind lately...and I've been practicing it in every level I can.
So I met up with this chick off tinder, and beforehand I've always seen sex as something purely robotic, transactional (I developed this fucked up worldview from banging hookers as my "firsts").
So I never got into the "rhythm"...say what you want about tinder but I could sense pretty strongly that this girl was into me so the sex was pretty good. And somewhere in the middle it clicked.
When it came to sex I was just trying to "get off", I never wanted to give "intimacy" or share myself with anyone...I was just trying to orgasm and leave. Now this is where the root of my problems lies and now I know where to start plowing.
thanks for the advice in previous posts guys, I'm feeling myself grow into a better man by the hour and honestly, to be frank, without the advice I have gotten on this site, I wouldn't be very far in life. So thank you all for your generosity.
Anyways, things that can improve:
- I felt like tinder was too easy, there was no "gaming" involved so I don't think I got better at persuasion or any of that...it was more of an inner game revelation.
- this was only a step above prostitution, the only thing that was different was that we were both into each other
Goals for the future:
- finally ask out a girl that I prospect and that I approached and that I like... I want to build the attraction from the ground up, not rely on either alcohol or some app to make things "easier".
I've always found that the harder route is the most fulfilling....that being said I'm far from having the balls to daygame haha so I'm sticking to social network which is somewhat limited.
So I just got back from my first non-hooker bang off tinder and it really kind of shifted my view on sex/relationships in general.
I know one tinder bang doesn't seem like a big deal to a lot of folks out there in the community but I was viewing sex/relationships through a very "selfish" light before my epiphany today.
I've lead a very selfish life up until now, and one of my business mentors told me to start giving and eventually, even if some people don't reciprocate, the universe tends to give back. So this theme of "giving" has been ringing pretty loud in my mind lately...and I've been practicing it in every level I can.
So I met up with this chick off tinder, and beforehand I've always seen sex as something purely robotic, transactional (I developed this fucked up worldview from banging hookers as my "firsts").
So I never got into the "rhythm"...say what you want about tinder but I could sense pretty strongly that this girl was into me so the sex was pretty good. And somewhere in the middle it clicked.
When it came to sex I was just trying to "get off", I never wanted to give "intimacy" or share myself with anyone...I was just trying to orgasm and leave. Now this is where the root of my problems lies and now I know where to start plowing.
thanks for the advice in previous posts guys, I'm feeling myself grow into a better man by the hour and honestly, to be frank, without the advice I have gotten on this site, I wouldn't be very far in life. So thank you all for your generosity.
Anyways, things that can improve:
- I felt like tinder was too easy, there was no "gaming" involved so I don't think I got better at persuasion or any of that...it was more of an inner game revelation.
- this was only a step above prostitution, the only thing that was different was that we were both into each other
Goals for the future:
- finally ask out a girl that I prospect and that I approached and that I like... I want to build the attraction from the ground up, not rely on either alcohol or some app to make things "easier".
I've always found that the harder route is the most fulfilling....that being said I'm far from having the balls to daygame haha so I'm sticking to social network which is somewhat limited.