7 Ways to Be a Modern Man [New York Times Article]
10-02-2015, 08:46 PM
1) ) If the Modern man has to get a gift - he goes for Lingerie or at least chocolates. Bitch buy your own shoes.
2) 2 is acceptable.
3) Why should a modern man be considerate in an inconsiderate world...Leo Tolstoy wrote a giant-ass novel where he wrestles with this problem, which from what I gather is quite far above the reading level of these people (I've read it three times).
4) I agree with 4 - but like I give a fuck what some guy does with his steak.
5) Park where you can park, lines are for pussies. The real modern man gives zero fucks if he's 'in the lines'.
6) Why is it the job of the modern man to do something so easy for his family? It's plugging in a phone, not taking down a deer at 150 yards with a crossbow, for fucks sake...my wife wants to look for new dick on Ashley Madison, my teenage daughter wants to attention whore on facebook and my son wants to talk about WoW on their phone? They can take three seconds to plug the joint in.
7) I only buy cola for mix. Help yourself to some apple juice, beer and coffee.
8) Why?
9) No it doesn't, because most women (yes, even your daughter) are trite, provincial, boring and all-too-happy to debase themselves for the right price - they aren't some sort of magical, mythical unicorn.
10) The modern man has a dishwasher - or a wife to do the dishes.
11) I don't know what this means - this modern man has been living his life and not learning the nuances and etiquette of Twitter.
12) I use body wash.
13) While amazing, relative to something like, say, Illmatic, Enter the Wu Tang has aged poorly (also - the idea of some suburban yuppie henpecked by his fat wife and disrespected by his kids bumping Bring Da Ruckus...There is some dissonance here). Acceptable Wu is limited to Enter the Wu Tang and some solo side gigs like Only Built 4 Cuban Linx, Liquid Swords and Fishscale. Get a copy of Illmatic instead, if you don't already own it.
14) Trivial and meaningless....I also can basically memorize everything I need.
15) Ok I get the aesthetic appeal...but I fucking hate hardwood flooring. It's expensive, too cold in the winter, and do you like having to bust out the pledge to clean it once a month? I sure as shit don't.
16) I lie on the side most comfortable to me.
17) I bet you've balled more than a few melons in your day...
18) A shoehorn is like what, $20? Just do it.
19) Where I grew up in the country I could pick flowers...I'm much more fond of surprising my girls with a thorough midday banging out of the ether than flowers or shoes.
20) I almost NEVER sleep well with someone else in my bed (I slept poorly last night). Position matters for shit - I just want someone with good 'sleep etiquette' - IE someone who isn't constantly trying to chat with me or someone who doesn't change her position every 5 minutes.
21) I wouldn't scold for this either...but I'd tell her to mind her manners and not be a slob.
22) Like anyone born past 1960 I get all my news online.
23) Michael Mann has made two good movies - Heat and Collateral...but why own them when you can watch them free online?
24) Bullshit - sometimes I NEED my phone for business or directions. Always on charge.
25) I'd have mad guns if I lived in America...how can I protect my family without a gun if a situation arises?
26) You're a fag.
27) Agree somewhat - we should all be at least competent dancers.
==
Some legit shit in there, a bunch of shit which appears manly...then a bunch of pussy-ass faggy shit about buying your wife shoes, being pro-gun control and plugging in your kids phones when they should be doing that shit themselves...
Sauce is weak.
2) 2 is acceptable.
3) Why should a modern man be considerate in an inconsiderate world...Leo Tolstoy wrote a giant-ass novel where he wrestles with this problem, which from what I gather is quite far above the reading level of these people (I've read it three times).
4) I agree with 4 - but like I give a fuck what some guy does with his steak.
5) Park where you can park, lines are for pussies. The real modern man gives zero fucks if he's 'in the lines'.
6) Why is it the job of the modern man to do something so easy for his family? It's plugging in a phone, not taking down a deer at 150 yards with a crossbow, for fucks sake...my wife wants to look for new dick on Ashley Madison, my teenage daughter wants to attention whore on facebook and my son wants to talk about WoW on their phone? They can take three seconds to plug the joint in.
7) I only buy cola for mix. Help yourself to some apple juice, beer and coffee.
8) Why?
9) No it doesn't, because most women (yes, even your daughter) are trite, provincial, boring and all-too-happy to debase themselves for the right price - they aren't some sort of magical, mythical unicorn.
10) The modern man has a dishwasher - or a wife to do the dishes.
11) I don't know what this means - this modern man has been living his life and not learning the nuances and etiquette of Twitter.
12) I use body wash.
13) While amazing, relative to something like, say, Illmatic, Enter the Wu Tang has aged poorly (also - the idea of some suburban yuppie henpecked by his fat wife and disrespected by his kids bumping Bring Da Ruckus...There is some dissonance here). Acceptable Wu is limited to Enter the Wu Tang and some solo side gigs like Only Built 4 Cuban Linx, Liquid Swords and Fishscale. Get a copy of Illmatic instead, if you don't already own it.
14) Trivial and meaningless....I also can basically memorize everything I need.
15) Ok I get the aesthetic appeal...but I fucking hate hardwood flooring. It's expensive, too cold in the winter, and do you like having to bust out the pledge to clean it once a month? I sure as shit don't.
16) I lie on the side most comfortable to me.
17) I bet you've balled more than a few melons in your day...
18) A shoehorn is like what, $20? Just do it.
19) Where I grew up in the country I could pick flowers...I'm much more fond of surprising my girls with a thorough midday banging out of the ether than flowers or shoes.
20) I almost NEVER sleep well with someone else in my bed (I slept poorly last night). Position matters for shit - I just want someone with good 'sleep etiquette' - IE someone who isn't constantly trying to chat with me or someone who doesn't change her position every 5 minutes.
21) I wouldn't scold for this either...but I'd tell her to mind her manners and not be a slob.
22) Like anyone born past 1960 I get all my news online.
23) Michael Mann has made two good movies - Heat and Collateral...but why own them when you can watch them free online?
24) Bullshit - sometimes I NEED my phone for business or directions. Always on charge.
25) I'd have mad guns if I lived in America...how can I protect my family without a gun if a situation arises?
26) You're a fag.
27) Agree somewhat - we should all be at least competent dancers.
==
Some legit shit in there, a bunch of shit which appears manly...then a bunch of pussy-ass faggy shit about buying your wife shoes, being pro-gun control and plugging in your kids phones when they should be doing that shit themselves...
Sauce is weak.