Quote: (09-27-2015 08:08 PM)Roosh Wrote:
Anyone else been bitten by the urge?
Yes, and the urge is strengthening at an alarming rate.
Few years ago I was slightly against having any children at all. Then I went to being 50/50, to now 90/10. I think you nail it on the head, we can't deny our biology. The comment about being the first one in our lineage of men not to reproduce has some serious weight to it.
Recently I have been giving this topic a lot of thought, and I mean a lot. Both consciously and to a slight extent subconsciously. I have noticed myself when out drinking with a girl, thinking about what she would be like as a wife or mother. Instead of thinking what her nipples look like, I think about whether she would care for me when I'm sick. Things like this now enter my mind. I was in Eastern Russia recently, and out with a rather attractive 19 year old girl. She was very happy to just be out with me. She would rub my head and stroke my arm. She wouldn't let me speak English, because she genuinely wanted me to try and learn Russian. Yes, I wanted to have sex with her and badly, but my thoughts turned more so to whether she would be a good mother. Absolutely crazy. But this is what has been happening.
I also now want to blast inside girls raw dog, something I dreaded as recently as 6 months ago. A few girls this summer have made me use condoms, and when I finish inside them with a condom it's a more powerful orgasm than pulling out and jacking myself off on them with my hand. So I say to myself, "wouldn't it be great to combine the wonderful feeling of rawdog with the climax of busting inside a girl?" What I claim is my desire for utmost pleasure may actually be my mind's way of allowing my subconscious and biologically rooted want to procreate, step through to the forefront undetected. I don't know.
I think Red Pill knowledge, or whatever nomenclature you want to attach to our ability to see the matrix, hurts us in several ways. First off, if you are like me and are not a natural and developed game, you probably feel like you have a superpower or are trying to make up for lost times (or likely both). It's a drug. Knowing that I can say "Hi" to a girl and be having sex with her the same night, or in some cases within an hour carries with it an awe conceptually that while I've done it enough times to know it is practically the norm these days, I still get a rush from it. I enjoy the process more than the chase and it is hard for me to give it up as a result. Game is still a game and I've learned how to win. I now understand star athletes that refuse to retire. They have gotten so good at something, it is difficult to walk away. Even if the injuries take longer to heal, they still know how to throw that touchdown or swing a bat and that drives them to continue.
But it gets tiring in the end. Roosh's recent posts have hit home for me on having sex with girls you don't like. This spring, I was in Moscow and invited a girl over to have sex that I was not into. As I took her shirt off, I had a flashback to doing the same exact thing in the year 2000. It freaked me out. 15 years and I'm still doing the same thing. I still had sex with her, but it has made no difference whatsoever in my life. Not even a memory I really care about. But I knew what to do to get the sex and my addiction took over me.
The second thing about the Red Pill knowledge is my belief that we know of worst case scenarios, and this scares us. We read all these articles, we've seen girls cheat, and what degenerates some or most girls - depending on your city - can be. But can't we use this as a tool? A source of knowledge to choose wisely rather than to be played? Perhaps it is a fantasy, but there is a reason almost all of us still hold on to that dream of a good wife and family. I have seen my friends and family grow from players or single men without game, to husbands and fathers. Some have done well for themselves in terms of wives, others have not. To be honest, there is no statistical advantage I've found to one side or another. I know players with game that got tired of the game, and wifed up horrible women that were just chaste with no other redeeming qualities. I know guys who maybe had sex with one or two girls wife up gems.
The key seems to be choosing the right woman, which I realize is not some secret I have just divulged to all of you. Perhaps the key is what is that criteria, and realistically. Those saying to hold out for that 19 year old model that loves to cook and give blowjobs, and has only had sex with two people before you will probably be waiting a long time. Yes it happens, just as how people win the lottery too. I'm trying to put together some framework, some outline of what would lead to a happy life with children. It's very hard, and I could easily be wrong about half if not more of my thoughts. I welcome criticism. Interestingly enough, a lot of my positions on these points have changed dramatically as I have gotten older.
One deviation from the general manosphere thought that I find myself more and more believing (or perhaps justifying) is not leaving America. And this is coming from someone who went to Russia 3x this year so far. I know this overarching belief that we must live in EE or somewhere else but I'm not sure I believe that. It's a tough life. Perhaps this is just me, but I need socialization with my family and friends here. A lot more than I thought before. I also believe my kids will be better off being around their grandparents, cousins, uncles, etc. moreso than living in Moscow or another EE city.
That said, she can't be American. This does not mean she has to be born/raised in another country however. But American women aside from all their other problems are just boring. Her parents however, must not be from America. Say what you will but non-Americans/westerners have stronger family values. They raise their kids differently and give them some substance.
I'm also valuing intelligence more. This is something that is new for me. I used to think she just needs to be a homemaker and I'm golden, who cares about her intellect. But having dealt with some girls that are just so dumb it's mindboggling, I cannot live a life having to speak to someone like this. Not to mention it would hurt your kids too. I have a friend who married an idiot, and I can see it in his eyes every time I am with him how much pain it brings him on a constant basis to tell his wife in a nice way that she is making a fool of herself by speaking.
And of course all the other standard things of being thin, not destroying her body with tattoos and piercings, not being a raging slut, etc.
What I have realized, and this brings us back to the point of this thread in the first place, is that men rarely regret the act of having children. Rather, the actual regret stems from marriage, which in turns means the regret stems from the woman chosen to be their partner. If you go down that path you have a difficult journey to embark upon, deciding who to spend the majority of your life with and who will be your partner in raising your lineage. I think it is equally difficult to encapsulate the criteria in words in general, much less a post on a forum.
But it's nice to try, and seeing others questioning the same things you are questioning at a minimum indicates we are not crazy for doing so.