I wouldn't usually straight up ask for advice (especially since, to date, i've offered little in the way of advice/data to the forum) but I'm in a situation that's throwing me off slightly because i'm having a hard time getting a read on it. I might just be too close to the situation to assess properly, so i'm looking to get some outside opinions on this one. I'm posting this here so as not to bog down the game forum proper with what's probably a cut and dried situation.
Short background: Friend of mine and i meet up with a girl he's been banging, she's already out early evening at a bar with an engaged friend. We show up, engaged friend has to leave, girl my buddy is banging immediately (without provocation) gets on the horn to invite her friends out. She's working on two of them, one of them shows up. Obviously looking to even up numbers, obviously hooking her friend up, obviously a cakewalk for me. Things go as expected because my in-person game is solid, the table was set for me, and i must have gotten the "thumbs up" from the broad doing the inviting. It's just as easy as i expected - make incidental contact which is reciprocated, then escalate it, hand her my phone with the "add number" screen up (which she obliges without hesitation), then later isolate her for a makeup at the bar. She resists coming home with me because she's "not a slut" (lol) but without a lot of pressure she changes gears and comes back to my place. Penetration commences, things go fine, take her home in the morning.
During the "rendezvous", she's almost OVERLY complimentary. Things like "guys like you are trouble, you're too hot to keep talking to me", "you're perfect", "you fuck SO hard" (which almost made me laugh out loud). I mean, things that borderline made me think she might be a weirdo. Thing is, she seems well adjusted for the most part otherwise, is a solid 8, and didn't act overly slutty outside of letting me bang the first night. Any hangups and other shit traits seemed limited to the usual early-20s girl shit - nothing remarkable.
St. Paddy's weekend was two nights later - we end up in the same general area and she's texting me begging me to meet up. Meet up and she's all over me, asking to come home with me. Take her home, repeat the first time pretty much (including excessive ego stroking) and she stays a bit longer the next morning before leaving. Talks pretty openly with me, seems normal, tells me she wants to see me again soon.
....And that's where it gets fucked up. I am a world-renowned shitty texter, and that's gotta be a large part of the issue. We text off and on (mostly flirty small talk) throughout the next week and she's out of town for the weekend so i don't press the issue. Work on locking down a hangout and she's pretty much avoiding answering anything concrete. Any extended silence (24 hours or so) is met with either a snapchat sent to start convo or her liking something of mine on instagram. I would usually initiate conversation a couple hours after she would do that and she'd respond quickly and be super talkative. Still though, keeping everything at arms length and brushing off attempts at locking anything down. She gets back, says she's tired and wants to take a nap so i offer to "fuck her to sleep". She just dismisses it like "i'm so tired i won't even need help to sleep". Ok then...
I'm seeing the writing on the wall so i push for a make or break (for myself) by offering a meetup to continue conversation in person two days after she'd gotten back (a Tuesday). Homegirl claims she would "love to" but "may or may not have pink eye". I assume this is bullshit and lay it out there like "up to you", she doesn't respond at all to that and i go radio silent for the rest of the night and the entire next day. Hear nothing from her.
Thursday (last thursday) she starts liking my shit on instagram, but doesn't reach out. Later that night, throw out a text to gauge response saying "how's the pink eye?". She responds pretty quickly and goes full blown chatty cathy, at one point even sending a screenshot of a convo confirming that she really did suspect she had pink eye. Good on ya, not just a bullshit excuse. Won't stop texting me all night long, continue talking the next day, at which time i drop "what are you doing this sunday? BOGO burgers at (burger place), bloody mary bar, you wanna tag along?". She replies yes immediately, acts crazy excited - fucking a, locked in.
Sunday: Text her to confirm around noon, she says she's still in then adds "cool if i meet you at your place? aka can i take a nap in your bed after we get back?". She meets up, we go get burgers and drinks, good conversation (i crush in person) and obvious signs of interest like arm touching and hard eye contact. The weirder stuff though:
-mentions "if you ever meet my mom....(blah blah blah):
-keeps complimenting my intelligence in such a way i'm led to believe she was screening me out for "dateability". I can't elaborate because it was more a sense i got rather than anything directly pointing to that.
-legitimately offers to pay for drinks at second place we went, with a genuineness not usually observed my yours truly in these situations.
-making callbacks to things i had said earlier, attempting to establish inside jokes with me.
She mentions wanting to kiss me a lot, but i withhold because i'm going for the bang and for some reason making her wait amuses me. I know she's coming back over anyways. Get home, obviously don't nap, bang most of the day and she leaves with a whole "we gotta hang out again soon" and all that. She'd never been to the sushi place in town so i offer that possibly during the week, she says definitely. No problem.
This week? Monday was relatively minimal convo, a bit of back and forth but nothing established enough to keep me entertained. Tuesday (a night i typically keep free) i ask her what she's doing, she says she's going to that sushi place with two friends. I play that into "you owe me sushi then, but hangout at my place is acceptable alternative payment. when are you free?". She says "tomorrow is the best day this week for me" i say "tomorrow it is". A couple texts back and forth then i leave it for the night. No messages from her either.
The next day (yesterday), ask her how the sushi was and she says they didn't even end up going. Ok then, i give her "we can go tonight?". Long delay, hits me with "just got out of work, crazy day!". Ignores the offer. I respond to the "crazy day text", she doesn't answer. A bit later i send another small-talk text, no answer. An hour and a half after my first response to her text about her getting out of work with no response, i send "So i’m getting pretty hungry and there’s a bonfire i’m gonna go to - not sure if you still had any intention of hanging out or whatever but i guess tonight’s not going to work for me" and head over to a friend's house for a bonfire (there really was a bonfire). She responds almost immediately with "ok have fun". I don't respond. 45 minutes later she texts "Are you off Friday?". I respond an hour later "Nah i work".
So, what's actually going on here? This should be easy given her behavior in person, i'm working on pipelining this for regular pussy/whatever else and it's like pulling teeth to lockdown anything in person. That's common and i've been through it enough to expect it, but the way she acts when we actually meet up is like a complete 180. Am i giving her too much control of the proceedings? It's unintentional if so, but i can see a good case being made for that. She did attempt a reschedule, but only after i flipped the script and made it feel like i cancelled on her - although she seemed content to just wait me out at that point even after agreeing to come over the night before. In the meantime i'm working on other options as it is, but this one is simultaneously my best and worst lead depending on the day. My only real thought is that my "ABC" sales-like attitude is killing momentum but i can't call it. Sorry for the long post, i'm a longwinded dude. Any thoughts on this one or should i just pull the plug and let her get a hold of me when she senses i'm doing my own thing?
Short background: Friend of mine and i meet up with a girl he's been banging, she's already out early evening at a bar with an engaged friend. We show up, engaged friend has to leave, girl my buddy is banging immediately (without provocation) gets on the horn to invite her friends out. She's working on two of them, one of them shows up. Obviously looking to even up numbers, obviously hooking her friend up, obviously a cakewalk for me. Things go as expected because my in-person game is solid, the table was set for me, and i must have gotten the "thumbs up" from the broad doing the inviting. It's just as easy as i expected - make incidental contact which is reciprocated, then escalate it, hand her my phone with the "add number" screen up (which she obliges without hesitation), then later isolate her for a makeup at the bar. She resists coming home with me because she's "not a slut" (lol) but without a lot of pressure she changes gears and comes back to my place. Penetration commences, things go fine, take her home in the morning.
During the "rendezvous", she's almost OVERLY complimentary. Things like "guys like you are trouble, you're too hot to keep talking to me", "you're perfect", "you fuck SO hard" (which almost made me laugh out loud). I mean, things that borderline made me think she might be a weirdo. Thing is, she seems well adjusted for the most part otherwise, is a solid 8, and didn't act overly slutty outside of letting me bang the first night. Any hangups and other shit traits seemed limited to the usual early-20s girl shit - nothing remarkable.
St. Paddy's weekend was two nights later - we end up in the same general area and she's texting me begging me to meet up. Meet up and she's all over me, asking to come home with me. Take her home, repeat the first time pretty much (including excessive ego stroking) and she stays a bit longer the next morning before leaving. Talks pretty openly with me, seems normal, tells me she wants to see me again soon.
....And that's where it gets fucked up. I am a world-renowned shitty texter, and that's gotta be a large part of the issue. We text off and on (mostly flirty small talk) throughout the next week and she's out of town for the weekend so i don't press the issue. Work on locking down a hangout and she's pretty much avoiding answering anything concrete. Any extended silence (24 hours or so) is met with either a snapchat sent to start convo or her liking something of mine on instagram. I would usually initiate conversation a couple hours after she would do that and she'd respond quickly and be super talkative. Still though, keeping everything at arms length and brushing off attempts at locking anything down. She gets back, says she's tired and wants to take a nap so i offer to "fuck her to sleep". She just dismisses it like "i'm so tired i won't even need help to sleep". Ok then...
I'm seeing the writing on the wall so i push for a make or break (for myself) by offering a meetup to continue conversation in person two days after she'd gotten back (a Tuesday). Homegirl claims she would "love to" but "may or may not have pink eye". I assume this is bullshit and lay it out there like "up to you", she doesn't respond at all to that and i go radio silent for the rest of the night and the entire next day. Hear nothing from her.
Thursday (last thursday) she starts liking my shit on instagram, but doesn't reach out. Later that night, throw out a text to gauge response saying "how's the pink eye?". She responds pretty quickly and goes full blown chatty cathy, at one point even sending a screenshot of a convo confirming that she really did suspect she had pink eye. Good on ya, not just a bullshit excuse. Won't stop texting me all night long, continue talking the next day, at which time i drop "what are you doing this sunday? BOGO burgers at (burger place), bloody mary bar, you wanna tag along?". She replies yes immediately, acts crazy excited - fucking a, locked in.
Sunday: Text her to confirm around noon, she says she's still in then adds "cool if i meet you at your place? aka can i take a nap in your bed after we get back?". She meets up, we go get burgers and drinks, good conversation (i crush in person) and obvious signs of interest like arm touching and hard eye contact. The weirder stuff though:
-mentions "if you ever meet my mom....(blah blah blah):
-keeps complimenting my intelligence in such a way i'm led to believe she was screening me out for "dateability". I can't elaborate because it was more a sense i got rather than anything directly pointing to that.
-legitimately offers to pay for drinks at second place we went, with a genuineness not usually observed my yours truly in these situations.
-making callbacks to things i had said earlier, attempting to establish inside jokes with me.
She mentions wanting to kiss me a lot, but i withhold because i'm going for the bang and for some reason making her wait amuses me. I know she's coming back over anyways. Get home, obviously don't nap, bang most of the day and she leaves with a whole "we gotta hang out again soon" and all that. She'd never been to the sushi place in town so i offer that possibly during the week, she says definitely. No problem.
This week? Monday was relatively minimal convo, a bit of back and forth but nothing established enough to keep me entertained. Tuesday (a night i typically keep free) i ask her what she's doing, she says she's going to that sushi place with two friends. I play that into "you owe me sushi then, but hangout at my place is acceptable alternative payment. when are you free?". She says "tomorrow is the best day this week for me" i say "tomorrow it is". A couple texts back and forth then i leave it for the night. No messages from her either.
The next day (yesterday), ask her how the sushi was and she says they didn't even end up going. Ok then, i give her "we can go tonight?". Long delay, hits me with "just got out of work, crazy day!". Ignores the offer. I respond to the "crazy day text", she doesn't answer. A bit later i send another small-talk text, no answer. An hour and a half after my first response to her text about her getting out of work with no response, i send "So i’m getting pretty hungry and there’s a bonfire i’m gonna go to - not sure if you still had any intention of hanging out or whatever but i guess tonight’s not going to work for me" and head over to a friend's house for a bonfire (there really was a bonfire). She responds almost immediately with "ok have fun". I don't respond. 45 minutes later she texts "Are you off Friday?". I respond an hour later "Nah i work".
So, what's actually going on here? This should be easy given her behavior in person, i'm working on pipelining this for regular pussy/whatever else and it's like pulling teeth to lockdown anything in person. That's common and i've been through it enough to expect it, but the way she acts when we actually meet up is like a complete 180. Am i giving her too much control of the proceedings? It's unintentional if so, but i can see a good case being made for that. She did attempt a reschedule, but only after i flipped the script and made it feel like i cancelled on her - although she seemed content to just wait me out at that point even after agreeing to come over the night before. In the meantime i'm working on other options as it is, but this one is simultaneously my best and worst lead depending on the day. My only real thought is that my "ABC" sales-like attitude is killing momentum but i can't call it. Sorry for the long post, i'm a longwinded dude. Any thoughts on this one or should i just pull the plug and let her get a hold of me when she senses i'm doing my own thing?