[Excelsior]

It does sound like an oxymoron, doesn't it? But hear me out.

I've seen a trend lately as I've browsed this forum and other sites/blogs, and I'm seeing increasingly significant references to what I call "Beta Provider Game". Another user on this forum a couple of weeks ago called it "selling the dream", but its all the same thing.

The premise is actually quite simple: target women whose clocks are ticking(late twenties, early thirties) and whose minds are entering "get a husband mode, and pretend to be a good, beta target.

Before they were looking for "sexy" stereotypically cool men, the guys who had the most status in their teens and early 20's. These were also the men that here friends approved the most of when she was younger(and, of course, we know how important female friend approval is to girls).

Now they are looking for more practical things. A good job, a nice place/car, a decent middle class income and a willingness to start a family. These are the men that their now older friends approve of most(they too are hearing the clock and now are competing to see who can sport the biggest wedding ring).

You can naturally see the huge in a guy has here.

Talk about how much you love kids and your little cousins. Casually mention that you own your own place(or car or whatever). Let it slip that you're a (insert reasonably well paying job title here). Watch her new, more mature attraction triggers light up, and you're in.

Some guys are apparently already leveraging this and using it to play the field. Roissy nails it, of course:

http://roissy.wordpress.com/2009/01/28/f...-provider/

Quote:

What I did:

-talked about my nieces and nephews and how much they loved it when I visited
-pared back my cocky funny game
-skipped the negs
-wore a business suit (minus tie)
-discussed future oriented subjects like “goals in life” and “where do you see yourself in five years?”
-remembered a few critical details about her from our first meeting in the bar which I sprinkled into our conversation
-told her I’m “happy with my career“
-slowed down my kino progression
-made sure our seats were in a corner of the bar where people wouldn’t see us kissing

This next blog has a few mentions of this strategy, including one that starts a bit of a moral debate about the idea(most of the men seem to approve of it, though some older female commenters express distaste[shocker]):

http://dalrock.wordpress.com/2010/07/23/...the-nerds/

Quote:

If I were a bitter beta I might decide I had a different choice other than “Take it or leave it”. He knows women of a certain age and a history of promiscuity are going to be looking for a sucker/nice guy like him to marry and settle down with. What if he decides to con the conwoman? All he has to do is what comes naturally to him. He may want to learn a little game to make him seem more interesting, but he doesn’t have to move to full alpha status.

All he has to do is put himself out there in places where these women are looking for marks, and look like a better mark than the others. Since some of the remaining betas will be manning the picket line and the alphas are busy with the new crop of carousel riders, this probably won’t be too hard. Then he just strings her along for a while, or maybe strings several along all the while talking the provider talk and enjoying the ride. And since she is in full blown (pardon the pun) bag a husband mode, she’s going to be giving him the best sex she can to seal the deal. After a while she’s bound to get wise to the jig, but then another carouseler should be jumping into his bed to fill the void.

This next post is a follow up to the last one:

http://dalrock.wordpress.com/2010/10/12/...-security/

Quote:

Marcos commented on the thread and said he in fact does exactly what I was pondering:

No matter what lake you find them in, the bait is the same. When they ask you (Trust me – they will! Several times) why you’re 34, 35 whatever years old and never married you just take a moment and say, “Candidly? I haven’t found the right girl. I’m a traditional man and was raised to believe the man takes care of all the bills and financial responsibility. You know, where the woman doesn’t mind taking care of the home. I don’t mind that a woman has a job/career or whatever…In fact that’s great! But I don’t want her to feel that she has to work. That’s my job. Also, I’ve been working all these years to get to a position financially to where I can afford the lifestyle my kids deserve and now I’m ready to focus on the right girl and settle down. You’d be surprised how hard it is to find a woman who wants to have kids and settle down these days.” Say this very relaxed, matter-of-factly tone and it will work. Especially if she’s over 32. Result: deer in headlights. And they buy it. Wanna know why?

Because what I say above taps into the psyche of all carouseler women:
1) These women really don’t want to work for a living – they just want something to occupy their time.
2) These women want a man to take care of all their financial needs/wants without them ever having to care about pricetags.
3) Of course, her biological clock is at the 11th hour and 59th minute.
4) The last reason she’ll buy it: hope.

What do you guys think? Have any of you reliably run this strategy with success? If so, how do you go about it and if not, would you consider trying it sometime?
It has its downsides(you might end up tricking a genuinely good girl) but the potential is there.