Roosh has a classic blog post about never letting a girl reject you twice.
It's worth it to read or reread the whole thing, that being said, here are the main points I want to focus on:
What are your redlines when hitting on a chick where you decide that she seems to be encouraging you, but in reality is just leading you on? Most men are so thirsty that ANY semblance of a green light from a girl makes them go into tunnel vision and assume that the lay is guaranteed, even though it's one green light amongst many red lights (i.e., mixed signals, and we all know what that means).
Recently, I was out solo and started chatting up two German tourists. They told me they were only in town for three days. In my mind I thought that's a great sign that they're down for random sex, but I kept my cool. I started chatting with the two of them, and, to my chagrin, I couldn't build rapport with the cuter of the two because the uglier one was being much more talkative.
Then some guy started talking to the uglier one, allowing me to get into a 1-on-1 conversation with the cuter one. The guy, like an idiot, bought all four of us chasers, and the girl I was talking to a cocktail.
We talked for close to an hour, and during that time the following happened (no particular order):
-I suggested a venue change to a place nearby about halfway through that she rejected.
-I put my arm around her waist, she didn't say anything or move it away, but she didn't lean in to me or reciprocate in any way, making it feel awkward, and preventing further escalation.
-She let other guys hit on her while I sat there.
-She took a selfie of her and I together (shouldn't have let her do this, whatever).
In regards to the selfie, I told her to send me the picture over What's App, which she did (important for later).
Then, without saying anything, both the German chicks got up, and walked away out of sight. I started mentally kicking myself for allowing the conversation to go on for more than thirty minutes without strong indicators of ONS potential.
I waited a few minutes, then left. I thanked the guy for the shots, and told him that I don't think they're down. He didn't agree, but then again, I don't trust the opinion of a guy whose game revolves around walking up to girls and buying them chasers and cocktails.
I walked to other bars in the area, but they were all closed.
As I get to the last good bar that I know of, and see that it's closed as well, I get a What's App message from the German saying "Where are you? You didn't say goodbye![[Image: wink.gif]](https://rooshvforum.network/images/smilies/wink.gif)
"
I wasn't far from the original bar where I met them. I could have easily walked there in five minutes. Most guys would interpret that message as a strong green light ("she totally wants to fuck you, bro!") but I took a minute to think about it.
First of all, it wasn't a guarantee of anything. More likely than not, by my estimation at least, she was looking for the ego boost of having a guy come running back to her, just so she could reject his advances again. Instead, I thought of Roosh's post, and reminded myself that I'm the prize. She had a chance, and she blew it. I'm not going to reward bad/disrespectful behavior, such as her getting up and not saying so much as "we'll be right back," expecting me to wait around like a lapdog.
I radio silenced her and went home.
Maybe you guys think this was a mistake, maybe not, either way I'd be interested to hear. Things like this take a lot of discipline that many men don't possess, especially since the allure of the unknown makes it so hard to justify NOT attempting or reattempting with a girl that's potentially down. By that I mean it's easy to get caught up in the male hamster trap that "you'll never know unless you try," or "you have nothing to lose" which are good mantras but only up to a certain point.
In most cases you'll never truly know if you were right or wrong, which is why doing this can be so tough. When you're drunk, horny, and out of prospects, it's not easy to think clearly. What stories or input do you have on the subject of calling it quits with a chick that seems to be stringing you on, whether it's related to my story or not?
[color=#FF0000;">tl]tl;dr:[/color]
I met two tourists at a bar and got mixed signals. After I talked to one of them for about 45 minutes, they got up and walked off without saying anything, so I left the bar. Later, the one I was talking to texted me an encouraging message implying I should come "say goodbye." I felt like I was being used to stroke her ego, so I went home, despite being very close to the bar she was at.
It's worth it to read or reread the whole thing, that being said, here are the main points I want to focus on:
Quote:Roosh V Wrote:
Even though she’s not interested, she will encourage the hell out of you just to get you to keep trying, all so that she can receive a big validation boost (something she will never admit to wanting).
...
If she ends the conversation first on her own volition, meaning there was no cockblock or fire in the bar, it’s 100% over.
What are your redlines when hitting on a chick where you decide that she seems to be encouraging you, but in reality is just leading you on? Most men are so thirsty that ANY semblance of a green light from a girl makes them go into tunnel vision and assume that the lay is guaranteed, even though it's one green light amongst many red lights (i.e., mixed signals, and we all know what that means).
Recently, I was out solo and started chatting up two German tourists. They told me they were only in town for three days. In my mind I thought that's a great sign that they're down for random sex, but I kept my cool. I started chatting with the two of them, and, to my chagrin, I couldn't build rapport with the cuter of the two because the uglier one was being much more talkative.
Then some guy started talking to the uglier one, allowing me to get into a 1-on-1 conversation with the cuter one. The guy, like an idiot, bought all four of us chasers, and the girl I was talking to a cocktail.
We talked for close to an hour, and during that time the following happened (no particular order):
-I suggested a venue change to a place nearby about halfway through that she rejected.
-I put my arm around her waist, she didn't say anything or move it away, but she didn't lean in to me or reciprocate in any way, making it feel awkward, and preventing further escalation.
-She let other guys hit on her while I sat there.
-She took a selfie of her and I together (shouldn't have let her do this, whatever).
In regards to the selfie, I told her to send me the picture over What's App, which she did (important for later).
Then, without saying anything, both the German chicks got up, and walked away out of sight. I started mentally kicking myself for allowing the conversation to go on for more than thirty minutes without strong indicators of ONS potential.
I waited a few minutes, then left. I thanked the guy for the shots, and told him that I don't think they're down. He didn't agree, but then again, I don't trust the opinion of a guy whose game revolves around walking up to girls and buying them chasers and cocktails.
I walked to other bars in the area, but they were all closed.
As I get to the last good bar that I know of, and see that it's closed as well, I get a What's App message from the German saying "Where are you? You didn't say goodbye
"I wasn't far from the original bar where I met them. I could have easily walked there in five minutes. Most guys would interpret that message as a strong green light ("she totally wants to fuck you, bro!") but I took a minute to think about it.
First of all, it wasn't a guarantee of anything. More likely than not, by my estimation at least, she was looking for the ego boost of having a guy come running back to her, just so she could reject his advances again. Instead, I thought of Roosh's post, and reminded myself that I'm the prize. She had a chance, and she blew it. I'm not going to reward bad/disrespectful behavior, such as her getting up and not saying so much as "we'll be right back," expecting me to wait around like a lapdog.
I radio silenced her and went home.
Maybe you guys think this was a mistake, maybe not, either way I'd be interested to hear. Things like this take a lot of discipline that many men don't possess, especially since the allure of the unknown makes it so hard to justify NOT attempting or reattempting with a girl that's potentially down. By that I mean it's easy to get caught up in the male hamster trap that "you'll never know unless you try," or "you have nothing to lose" which are good mantras but only up to a certain point.
In most cases you'll never truly know if you were right or wrong, which is why doing this can be so tough. When you're drunk, horny, and out of prospects, it's not easy to think clearly. What stories or input do you have on the subject of calling it quits with a chick that seems to be stringing you on, whether it's related to my story or not?
[color=#FF0000;">tl]tl;dr:[/color]
I met two tourists at a bar and got mixed signals. After I talked to one of them for about 45 minutes, they got up and walked off without saying anything, so I left the bar. Later, the one I was talking to texted me an encouraging message implying I should come "say goodbye." I felt like I was being used to stroke her ego, so I went home, despite being very close to the bar she was at.