Quote: (11-17-2014 02:22 PM)WestIndianArchie Wrote:N.B. This is all based on my experience with Canadian culture.
- I know what social mores are being violated. And touching a stranger, a tap on the shoulder, fingertips on the back, "the claw", gorilla pimping grabs - all of that breaks unspoken rules.
You can get crazy hostile reactions from a tap, nudge, touch - and it will fuck up your approach before it even starts.
I think it depends on the context. I almost never touch girls during the day because it violates their bubble, as you say. But say a girl is standing facing away from me on the bus, I'll tap her on the shoulder to get her to turn around, then open.
I'm quite new to night game so I can't say what's more effective. But I don't think one's breaking "rules" by touching a girl when one opens her in a bar or club. It's pretty normal to touch someone on the shoulder to get their attention in a loud environment. In crowded clubs people's bubbles become almost nonexistent as one has to push through the crowd/brush by others just to walk around. The other night what I'd often do is approach a girl from the side and put my hand on her shoulder to get her to look toward me, then open her. In the many approaches I did, I didn't receive any hostile reactions to this.
There are a number of studies that suggest that people actually have more positive reactions toward strangers who touch them, see points 1-4: http://www.spring.org.uk/2011/04/10-psyc...-touch.php
Both the bus and the club are loud, crowded environments where it's more difficult to pick out an initial address from someone, and the quantity of personal personal space expected is reduced. In these kinds of environments, touching strangers to get their attention is more socially acceptable. I certainly wouldn't do this in a coffee shop or grocery store.